Author's Notes: I do not own Once Upon A Time which is a show on ABC where Zelena keeps stealing just about everything I've had the Blue Fairy do. It's weird. Also, why does she know everything? Anyway, thanks for the reads and reviews and follows. Sorry this wasn't sooner but I had a race out of town last weekend. Anyway, please, please let me know what you think and happy reading!
"Do you have any idea how weird we look?," asked Beatrice as she sipped her espresso.
Gold turned and handed Beatrice her eggs and bacon. "You should have seen me before."
"I did see you and yes, that was weird and seriously did you try some moisturizer on that?"
"It didn't occur to me."
"What I meant was the detectives."
"Don't worry yourself, sweetheart. Once they've talked to Neal, they'll be on their way."
Beatrice shook her head. "See, I've watched a lot of Law and Order and let me tell you how this looks. Two detectives come to a small town in Maine to look for a missing woman and talk to her fiancé. They find that the fiancé is the father of the sheriff's son who is also the mayor's son. They also find the fiancé is the son of the man who owns the whole freaking town and he is married to the town librarian, who looks like a model and has to be like what twenty, thirty years younger than him?"
"Thirty years? Really?"
"You're really like three hundred years older and you're complaining to me about thirty?"
"Do I look thirty years older?"
"Vanity issues much?"
"Maybe."
"Moving on, let's not even count the second wife's estranged father and oh, yeah, her biological father who splits his time between the library and the sheriff's station because he has a vendetta against a nun. Let's not even go into his sister who has strange weather phenomena following her everywhere and an arson charge."
"A dropped arson charge and if they approach you, you don't speak to them without me."
Beatrice nodded. "Right, because we have to discuss the crap story we made up and then hope Henry doesn't blow the whole thing."
"What makes you think Henry's the weak link?"
"The kid is not a good liar."
Belle entered. "And I suppose you know the qualities that make a good liar?"
Beatrice motioned at Belle. "And here's someone who might be worse."
"You are a terrible liar," said Gold. "Though Beatrice does make an interesting point."
"I do?"
"You do. The longer we take to deal with those problem, the more likely we are to expose our vulnerabilities so we should deal with this problem..."
"Is this going to be like on The Sopranos when Tony calls a guy in the middle of the night to bring a box of trash bags, a shovel and some bleach?"
Gold looked at Belle. "You let her watch The Sopranos?"
"More to the point, how are you planning to deal with Greg and Tamara?," asked Belle. "Rumple..."
"If Tamara were to magically reappear, that would answer all questions and put an end to any investigation."
"Yeah, but our best case scenario is that she tells them we're all a bunch of fairy tale characters," said Beatrice. "Well, you people are fairy tale characters. At this point, I'm sort of the kid in a Disney straight to video movie."
Gold stood at the entrance to the mine. "Where's Merlin?"
Regina walked towards him. "From what Emma tells me, he's off on his own project with Mother Superior. She implored me to help her stop him and whatever punishment he has planned for her."
They exchanged rueful smirks.
"Shall we, Your Majesty?," Gold asked.
They walked down the tunnel.
"What exactly is your idea, Gold?," said Regina.
"Have you gotten anything out of them?"
"Not really," said Regina. "There seems to be no link to whoever they're working for, this society against magic."
"And have Charming and his bride been offering their help?"
"Yes."
"Then I have an idea."
They arrived at Tamara's cell. Regina waved her hand and the bars lifted.
Tamara seethed. "So he's here now? You think Rumplestiltskin can scare me?"
Gold shrugged. "I don't care about scaring you, dearie."
"Then what are you here for?"
"Well, that depends, dearie, are you going to help me?"
"And why would I help the Dark One?"
"Because if you don't I have to do this."
Tamara watched in confusion then wode-eyed, gawking realization as Gold reached his hand inside her chest and pulled out a glowing, beating heart. Her glowing, beating heart.
"See, this is going to make your cooperation much easier," said Gold. "Don't worry, you won't feel a thing."
Gold turned to Regina. "You remember how to use one of these, don't you, dearie?"
Regina glared.
The morning after her family returned from the Enchanted Forest, Belle was still having trouble helping with some of the fallout. That wasn't helped by the bottle of wine she had to help herself through the fallout, but had been helped by the Bloody Mary Rumple made her.
"Rumple..."
"The Charmings," he said with contempt. "The Charmings."
"It's not as if either he or Emma knew," said Belle. She turned to see Beatrice stumbling into the kitchen and grabbed her in a huge hug. "There's my girl. How are you feeling?"
Beatrice groaned.
"Oh, poor thing," said Belle.
Beatrice went and took her stool at the counter. "More pancakes, please."
"Coming up," said Gold. "Although if your mother has her way I'll have to make breakfast for the Charmings."
"You're family with them now," said Belle sitting next to Beatrice. "It's not as if we won't have to see each other."
"Yes, they have a problem and they come to me and beg me to solve it, only now they'll throw in my face that their daughter and my son-" He grimaced, unable to finish the sentence.
Beatrice could only concentrate on her own pain. "My legs hurt, my feet hurt, my arms hurt. I hate walking. And zombie fighting."
"Zombie fighting?," Belle asked, turning to Gold for an explanation.
"Cora's minions," said Gold. He looked at Beatrice. "Though you would have done better to not mess about with the sword and skip straight to the freezing people. That reminds me, Belle, about your grandmother..."
"Catherine?"
"You never mentioned she was the Catherine the Ice Princess. Neither did she, actually."
"Yeah, way to bury the lead, Mom," said Beatrice. "Assuming that is the lead."
"To be fair," said Belle, "you never asked if she was the Catherine the Ice Princess."
"No one mentioned it as a possibility," said Gold. "I just thought she was an old woman who liked to make tea and sarcastic comments. At any rate, Beatrice seems to have inherited her powers."
"Yeah and if somebody could get me an index card on what those are, that would be great," said Beatrice.
Belle smiled at Beatrice. "My grandmother was a princess of the Far North Kingdom. There used to be two. One Ice, one Summer."
"Used to be?," asked Beatrice.
"My grandmother kept the Far North frozen to protect it from ogre invasion."
"God, why can't you people problem solve this ogre thing?"
Gold put a plate down in front of Beatrice. "I am the problem solver which I'm sure our new charming in-laws will remind me of."
"I thought your dad was coming," Emma said to Neal.
"He told me he was handling this," Neal said, looking from his coffee to the detectives. Emma had let them borrow her office and as they spoke behind the glass they could only guess at what deductions they had made.
"They're not going to wait forever," Emma said, nodding as Barone and Keller walked over.
Neal sighed. "Let's get this over with."
"Mr. Cassady, let's talk alone," said Barone.
"We can talk in front of Emma," said Neal.
"You do realize how strange this town looks, don't you?," asked Keller.
"What do you mean?," asked Neal.
"Well, your son's mother is the sheriff, your son's adopted mother is the mayor, your dad owns the whole town and your stepmom..."
Neal frowned. "What about Belle?"
The doors burst open and Tamara came in.
"Neal, Emma, hi," she said. She motioned at Barone and Keller. "These must be the detectives."
"Ms. Milton," said Barone in astonishment.
"I found out you've been looking for me and I knew I had to come back, to explain what happened and apologize for all the trouble I've caused everyone," said Tamara. "Especially that nice mayor."
Emma tried to hide her surprise. "Yeah, I just remembered I have to make a phone call..."
Beatrice walked into the shop to see Regina and her father.
"So you know those detectives are still here, right?"
"I wouldn't worry about it, sweetheart," said Gold. "How was school otherwise?"
Beatrice then saw Regina was talking to a heart.
She pointed. "Uh, that's a, sorry, is that-"
"Yes, it's a heart. It's Tamara's," said Gold. "Didn't you have a French test?"
Beatrice shook her head. "Why do I live in a world where this is normal?"
"Do you mind?," asked Regina. "I'm trying to listen."
"How can you listen to that?," asked Beatrice.
"I'll let you hold it in a minute, I'm busy," said Regina.
"I don't want to hold it," said Beatrice. "Why would I want to hold it? Shouldn't you have gloves on?"
"Beatrice, it's really quite simple. Tamara wasn't telling us what we needed to know and the most efficient way for those detectives to leave is to have her tell them herself she's fine," said Gold. "When you take a heart it becomes enchanted. We control the heart and we control Tamara," said Gold.
"Well, hasn't your classroom gotten kinder?," said Regina.
Gold motioned to the heart. "Why don't you keep to your task? Beatrice." He ushered her out of the back room.
"What does she mean your classroom? Do I have to rip out someone's heart? I don't want to rip out anybody's heart."
"No, sweetheart, of course you don't. You ought to know how it works, though."
"Great, if I find a heart on the ground, I will pick it up and I don't know..." She paused. "Have you done it to Owen?"
"No, we just needed Tamara."
"Then we don't know why he dated Mom?"
"Don't worry, sweetheart. I'm going to find out."
Regina came out to the front of the shop. "It's done."
"Very nice, dearie. Now we just have to wait for the moral outrage," said Gold. He looked at Regina. "I would recommend leaving out the back."
Regina smirked. "They don't scare me."
"Yes, but do you want another long drawn out argument over why you can't spend time with Henry?" Regina looked at him in surprise. He waved his hand dismissively. "Consider it payment for your help today."
Regina left.
"What moral outrage?," asked Beatrice.
The shop's doorbell rang as David and Mary Margaret entered.
"That was quicker than expected," said Gold. "It must be the internet."
"What did you do to her?," asked Mary Margaret.
"First, Mother Superior, now this?," asked David. "We were supposed to be working together."
"One, Tamara is fine," said Gold. "She's certainly safer now than when she was running about town deceiving my son and leaving my daughter to freeze to death in the woods. I took her heart."
Mary Margaret shook her head. "How-"
"To answer your other accusation, Mother Superior is Merlin's problem now. You ought to thank him. As for working together, when you come to me with a problem and I solve it, is that what you mean by working together?," asked Gold.
"You didn't have to do this," said Mary Margaret.
"Then why don't you tell me your solution, dearie?," said Gold.
"And I suppose this is the example you want to set for your daughter," said Mary Margaret, motioning at Beatrice.
"To be fair, I just got here," said Beatrice.
"Don't presume to tell me about my daughter," said Gold.
"I'm telling Belle," said Mary Margaret.
"I mean the heart was already out," said Beatrice. "I feel like we should put it in a Ziploc or something, though."
"This isn't over, Gold," said David.
"Uh-huh."
Belle walked into the kitchen and put her bag down. Gold worked at the stove.
"Beatrice is doing her homework," said Gold.
Belle took a seat on a bar stool at the counter.
"So, the Charmings spoke with you?"
"Yes, they did."
"And?"
Belle shrugged. "I think they wanted me to be more outraged than I was."
"And how is your level of outrage?"
Belle frowned at him. "The detectives left. I understand why you did what you did." She shrugged. "I'm never going to be as good as they are."
Gold narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean as good as they are?"
"If someone told me to put Beatrice in a portal to another land to save everyone from a curse, I would say they could go to hell."
"That doesn't make you less good. That makes you her mother."
"No, it does and I'm fine with that because I would always rather be her mother," said Belle. "You know Neal's not happy."
Gold chuckled. "I expect not."
Belle paused. "And Beatrice? She didn't..."
Gold shook his head. "I took the heart. Regina was the one to command it. Beatrice didn't even want to look upon it. It takes a particular kind of anger to take a heart and she doesn't have it. She takes after her mother."
Belle nodded. "Now that you have Tamara's heart, what do you plan to do with it?"
"Not that much."
"Perhaps you could use it to get some information out of Owen. Or Greg or whatever he wants to call himself."
Gold leaned in. "What did you have in mind?"
"So, you're really doing this?," asked Belle looking from the cart of books to Beatrice.
"Yeah," said Beatrice, turning back to her iPad.
"Are you sure you don't want any help?"
"Mom..."
"Okay, okay, I didn't say anything..." Belle paused. "You do know though if you need help I'm here."
"Help for what?," asked Henry, coming up to the circulation desk with a book.
"Beatrice is organizing a food drive," Belle said proudly.
"Oh, cool," said Henry.
The door opened and Regina came in.
"Hi, Mom," said Henry, abandoning his checkout and going to Regina for a hug.
"Hi, honey," said Regina. "I was just coming by to peruse..."
Belle tried to hide her frown at Regina's blatant lie. She had been in several times this week in search of her son under the guise of looking for something.
"How is school?," asked Regina. "Do you like your new teacher?"
Before Henry could answer, the door opened and David stuck his head in.
"Come on, kid. We have to go to the stables."
"Oh," said Henry. He looked up at Regina. "I'll see you at Thanksgiving, right?"
"I, uh..." Regina shook her head. "I don't think so, Henry."
"Then who are you going to be with?," asked Henry.
"Don't worry. I make my own fun."
Henry nodded and went with David.
"Well, I'll just peruse then," said Regina.
Belle looked over at Beatrice.
"Oh, come on..." said Beatrice, able to read her every one of her mother's expressions in an instant. "We're already having the Charmings."
"When did you start calling them that?"
She shook her head. "I don't know. Just caught on."
Belle looked back at Regina pretending to thumb through the new arrivals then back at her daughter. "Don't tell your father."
"Wasn't going to..."
Belle walked over.
"Regina," said Belle.
Regina turned back. "Your collection seems to be lacking."
"You know," said Belle purposefully ignoring her, "we're having Thanksgiving dinner at our house. The three of us, Neal, Tamara, Mary Margaret, David, Emma and Henry. You could come over if you like."
"I don't think so."
"Please do," said Belle. "It would make Henry so happy. I know he misses you."
"That hardly seems to matter..."
"Well, it does to me," said Belle.
Regina narrowed her eyes. "Why? Why would you help me? I locked you up, I sent you out of town so your daughter wouldn't break my curse. I would have sent you away when you came back."
"Yes, I remember," said Belle. "You love your son, though and he's Rumple's grandson. That makes you part of our family."
"Because it wasn't weird enough!," Beatrice shouted.
"How can you hear all the way over there?," asked Belle.
"I hear a lot of things I don't want to hear," said Beatrice. "Why do you think I got noise-cancelling headphones?"
"Ew," said Regina.
"Yeah. Exactly," said Beatrice.
Owen looked up in surprise as Tamara entered the cell.
"Tamara."
"Oh, baby," she said smashing a kiss against his lips.
"How did you-"
"Snow White let her guard down. She's not very smart. Or pretty." Tamara took out a ring of keys. "Come on. We've got to get out of here. I have a car waiting."
"We came to this town for a reason. We have to deliver the package."
Tamara shook her head. "How can we do that now?"
"Wait until you see what I found."
Belle drove with Gold and Regina still holding Tamara's heart.
"Regina, do you really think Tamara has nothing better to talk about than Mary Margaret?," asked Belle.
"Sorry I'm not doing it the way you would," said Regina.
Belle looked out. "There's nothing out here. We've passed every last farm in town."
"They're pulling over," said Gold.
Belle stopped. They watched as Greg and Tamara got out of their car and walked to what appeared to be an empty field.
"It's some sort of protection spell," said Regina. "Greg says he has something to render the spell..."
"Regina, what is it?," asked Belle.
"Magic beans," said Regina, already seething. "The Charmings have been growing magic beans."
"The giant must have brought one over. Once again, so glad I could help them keep him at normal size," said Gold. He opened the car door. "I've seen enough."
They walked to the field. Owen looked up as Tamara hung her head.
"What?"
"Don't blame her," said Regina. She waved the heart.
"Tamara?," asked Owen.
"I wasn't able to control myself," she wept.
"Now, now, dearie, we'll have none of that," said Gold. He plucked a magic bean from its stalk. "What did you need this for?"
"I'm not telling."
Gold shrugged. "Suit yourself." He threw the bean down and the ground erupted into a vortex. "You can leave now."
"What?"
"See, I can't keep you two around and people seem to frown on me killing you so you need to leave." He nodded towards the vortex. "On your way then."
"What about my heart?," asked Tamara.
"You'll just have to find out," said Regina.
Belle sighed, she grabbed the heart out of Regina's hand and threw it in the vortex.
"Go get it," said Belle.
Tamara and Owen jumped. The vortex closed, leaving scorched earth in its place.
Regina looked at the bean stalks. "And what do we do about this place? Burn it?"
"Right because we couldn't ever possibly need a magic bean for anything, could we, dearie?," asked Gold.
"I know you don't want to go home," said Regina.
"Indeed not, but there other things to do with magic beans," he said.
"Well, which ones don't involve stealing my son?"
Belle shook her head. "I can't believe they did this without saying anything."
"Believe it," said Regina.
"Everyone step back," said Gold.
They walked back outside the perimeter. Gold waved held out his hand and a wave of magic rendered the field invisible again.
"I'm guessing I can't undo that," said Regina.
"You have a history of bad decision-making," said Gold. He turned to face her. "This is for the best."
"So what do we do about the Charmings?," asked Regina.
Earlier That Day
The Storybrooke Library was starting to get a flow of consistent customers. Mrs. Foley came in twice a week, once with her boys, once to lead the book club. Today though she brought a new patron, a squirming little newborn girl.
"What have you decided to call her?," asked Belle.
"Enola."
"Enola," said Belle cuddling the baby. "She still has that newborn smell."
"Do you just have the one?"
Belle nodded. "Trust me, she is plenty. I have no desire to go back to sleepless nights."
Mrs. Foley scoffed. "Try raising boys."
Belle looked at her. "Are you sure we didn't meet back in our land?"
"I think I would remember that."
Belle looked up as David and Mary Margaret stormed into the library.
"Belle, we need to talk," said Mary Margaret.
Belle sighed. "Goodbye, Enola." She handed her off and Mrs. Foley left.
"Belle, he has gone too far this time," said Mary Margaret.
Belle paused briefly, wondering who they meant. Merlin had been missing in action for a few days and she didn't think whatever he eventually did to the Blue Fairy would surprise her. Though Rumple had mentioned the Tamara problem this morning...
"Which one?," Belle finally asked.
"Gold," said David.
"He ripped out Tamara's heart," said Mary Margaret.
Belle considered this. "Okay."
"That's not okay, Belle," said Mary Margaret.
"Did he do something to it?," asked Belle.
"No," said David. "She just sort of turned up and told the detectives she wasn't missing."
"So they'll be leaving?," asked Belle.
"That's not the point," said Mary Margaret. "We can't use dark magic to solve all of our problems."
"Were we just supposed to ask her nicely to tell the detectives she wasn't missing?"
"Beatrice was there," said Mary Margaret.
"Yes," said Belle.
"Aren't you concerned?"
"I'm her mother. I'm always concerned, but I know Rumple is looking after her," said Belle.
"We're family. I just worry," said Mary Margaret.
"I understand," said Belle. "Beatrice is fine, though."
Belle marched into Granny's. Emma was sitting with David and Mary Margaret.
"We need to talk," said Belle. "Outside. Now."
"Belle, what is it?," asked Mary Margaret.
"Outside. Now unless you want everyone in here to know what you've been keeping outside of town."
Emma looked at her parents as Belle marched out the door. "Guys, what is she talking about?"
Mary Margaret and David got up. Emma followed outside to find Gold's car.
"Well, isn't this a surprise? The Charmings aren't as good as they appear to be," said Gold.
"We were going to tell you," said Mary Margaret.
"Oh, when was that going to be?," asked Regina. "Before or after you took my son to the Enchanted Forest?"
Emma shook her head. "What? Regina, are you crazy? I mean, more than usual?"
Gold held up a magic bean. "Then where did we get this?"
"What is that?," asked Emma.
"A magic bean," said Belle.
"We were going to give you a choice if you wanted to come with us," said David.
"You have to understand we can't just let things go back to how they were," said Mary Margaret. "There would have to be conditions."
"Oh, dearie, do you really think you get to dictate terms to me?," asked Gold.
"If I wanted to go back there, do you think I would agree to be your prisoner?," asked Regina.
"Belle..." said Mary Margaret.
"What? Do you suppose I want to go back there? Do you suppose I really enjoyed the way things were?," asked Belle.
"Hold on," said Emma. "You guys were planning to go back to the Enchanted Forest?"
"We want you to come with us," said David.
Regina scoffed. "You mean you weren't going to ditch her like you did the last time?"
"Watch it, Regina," warned Mary Margaret.
"No, Your Highness, you watch it," said Gold. "See, that field is mine now and I don't want to go anywhere. I think you'll find that my son is as opposed to the idea of being separated from his son as I am. So no one is going anywhere."
"You can't do this, Gold," said David.
"Well, unless one of you is willing to sacrifice the heart of the thing you love most, I think I can," said Gold.
"Belle," said Mary Margaret.
"All this time I thought we were supposed to be a family," said Belle. "I suppose that only applies if you need something."
Regina shook her head. "I spent Christmas with you," she said, her voice dripping with contempt.
"Where did you guys go?," asked Beatrice.
She caught their expressions and their lack of an answer as they removed their coats.
"What happened?"
"Let's just say we don't need to worry about inviting the Charmings to anything," said Gold.
"What happened?," Beatrice repeated.
"It's nothing for you to worry about, sweetheart," said Gold.
Beatrice looked up at Belle. "Mom?"
Belle sat down on the sofa next to Beatrice. "Mary Margaret and David want to go back to the Enchanted Forest."
"Oh," said Beatrice. She wrinkled her nose. "Do we have to go back to the Enchanted Forest?"
"We most certainly are not," said Gold.
There was a knock at the door. Gold walked back and opened it to find a woman that was rather stunning in a very familiar way.
"It is cold out there. Thanks for getting the door, handsome," she said striding in on her stiletto boots.
"Just who exactly-"
"Oh, look who it is!," she said as Belle stood. Before Belle knew what had happened the woman was hugging her. She now turned her attention to Beatrice. "And you! You turned out perfect!"
Beatrice was trying to form a retort but the woman was pinching her cheeks. "Mom, help," she said.
"I'm sorry, I don't understand-" said Belle.
"Oh, come on, you remember that, right?," asked the woman. "You were with that one in the jungle, in a state of total ecstasy-"
"Someone please make her stop," said Beatrice.
She pointed at Gold. "I miss the scales, then again, I like weirdos."
"The jungle?," asked Belle.
"Right. You made a wish to me. For a little girl? There she is?"
"Oh, Gods," said Belle.
"Yeah, just the one, sweetie. I'm Venus."
Beatrice leaned over. "Is she for real?"
Belle stared at the woman in shock.
"Did Merlin not mention I was coming?," she asked.
"Why would Merlin mention you?," asked Gold.
"Because I'm his mother," she said pointedly. "I'm here for the whole Blue Fairy thing."
Belle looked to Gold.
"I'm sorry. Did no one listen when I asked if there were any more surprise relatives?," asked Beatrice.
