AN: Thank you for all your support through your reviews and messages here as well as tweets, retweets, messages, and follows on Twitter. You guys are great!
And thank you for your patience. Sorry for the wait. It is finally here! The next chapter.
I really hope that you like this chapter, it is a special one in this story.
Disclaimer: I do not own Lost Girl or any of the established characters. Established characters from Lost Girl belong to The Lost Girl creators. The story is however mine.
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"SHE WHAT?!" Bo screams into her phone. "How could you let her leave Kenz?! It's a nightmare out there! I barely got home safe. She could die!" The dreadful thought instantly makes Bo feel nauseous and sick to her stomach.
Bo just got home, soaking wet and with a few minor cuts and bruises from all sorts of debris, objects, small branches, and twigs flying around out there. As soon as she got home she could see that there were a bunch of messages on her answering machine and when she looked at her cell phone she had dozens of texts and missed calls from Kenzi as well. At first, she thought Kenzi was just worried about her getting home safe, but when she called Kenzi she found out that it was much worse. Lauren is out in the storm right now. - Because of her! If anything happens to Lauren it will all be her fault because she didn't stay at Crystal's. If anything happens to Lauren she will never be able to forgive herself.
"I have to go Kenz! I need to change into some dry and warm clothes and get a flashlight, the first aid kit, and some blankets and then I'm going out to look for her!"
"Bo, you can't! It's too dangerous! You putting yourself in danger as well won't do anybody any good, not when we don't know which route she took. She could have taken at least 5 or 6 different routes, so it's just too dangerous. I'm sorry. We should have stopped her. But you should stay at your apartment, hopefully she will turn up soon." Kenzi says from the other end, but her tone isn't convincing.
"How long after I left did she leave?"
"Probably 20 minutes." Kenzi replies.
Bo's entire body is failing her. She has never been this scared in her life. The other night when Lauren found out about the bet and walked out, Bo experienced the greatest panic she had ever experienced, but that was no comparison to the panic she is feeling right now. "Bloody hell! I have been home for about 10-12 minutes now. I am going to change and get the things I need, and as soon as it has been 20 minutes and 1 second since I got home, I am going out there to look for her Kenz. I will be okay! I can't not go out there! I have to go, it's Lauren!"
"I know! I understand… Just be safe Bo, okay?"
But before Bo can answer the line is dead.
Bo hangs up and immediately tries calling Lauren but the lines are dead. "Dammit!" she exclaims in frustration.
She frantically searches through the kitchen drawers for the flashlight she knows is there somewhere. The streetlights are out in this part of town because of the storm so it is pitch black out there, she will need to find the flashlight before she can leave. Finally she finds it and luckily it works when she tests it. She grabs a few blankets and the first aid kit and puts it all on the kitchen table together with the flashlight. Now all she needs to do is change into something dry and warm. Bo's first instinct is to just leave in her wet clothes as that would be quicker, but she might be out there for a while and she knows that it won't do any of them any good if she is slowed down because she is too cold to run.
Bo starts taking off her wet jacket and blouse as she runs towards the stairs. 3 steps up the stairs she hears the familiar sound of the front door opening and it feels as though her heart stops entirely…. She quickly turns around and sees a soaking wet and exhausted Lauren stumble through the door. Bo has never been more relieved and grateful than she is in this moment. Bo's smiles from ear to ear as she hurries towards Lauren to help her shut the front door, which is being held open due to the wind. Lauren sees her and the look of exhaustion on her face turns into anger and Bo's smile fades a bit. Bo shuts the door and Lauren walks over to the kitchen table and lets herself exhaustedly fall down on one of the chairs.
Lauren makes no attempt to hide her frustration. Staring Bo straight in the eyes, she lets her have it. "You stubborn, hard-headed, irresponsible, careless, frustrating woman! How could you put your life at risk like that by going out into this storm?! Do you not care about your life at all? - Or the people who care about you?"
Bo walks over to the opposite side of the kitchen table. "Me?! Well you aren't much better yourself, are you?! You went out into the storm as well! – Putting your own life at risk! You scared the shit out of me Lauren! I thought you might… I would never have been able to…"
"Well, I wouldn´t have had to go out there if you had just stayed at Crystal's! You walked out! You wanted me to listen, but when things got uncomfortable you left!" Lauren retorts.
They stare into each other's eyes silently for a few seconds.
Bo tries to slow down her breathing and calm herself a bit. "Why did you go after me?" Bo asks curiously.
Lauren is shivering in her wet and cold clothes. "Did you buy that weekend trip at the silent auction?" Lauren asks, her tone softer but her eyes demanding the truth.
"Lauren, you are freezing. You need to get changed into some warm clothes. You'll get sick." Bo says worried. "And I will just quickly send Kenzi a text letting her know that you didn't get yourself killed…." But then Bo realizes that the lines are probably still dead.
"And you need to put on some clothes, it's not easy arguing with you when you are half-naked." Lauren says gesturing towards Bo, who is oblivious to the fact that she is standing there in her bra and wet jeans because Lauren came as she was undressing. "But first, you need to answer my question Bo! You can't keep doing this. I deserve some answers!"
Bo looks down at her wet bra and jeans and has to stifle a smile. Lauren noticed.
"I will answer but if you won't change right now, at least take those blankets."
Lauren grabs the blankets and wraps them around her. "Now. Did you buy that weekend trip at the silent auction?"
Bo maintains eye contact. "Yes."
"Why? Because you wanted to win the bet?" Lauren maintains eye contact but the look in her eyes, the hurt, makes Bo feel like someone is stabbing her directly in the heart.
"No, Lauren…. It wasn't about the bet. I had called off the bet by then. I did it to help the clinic, to make sure that it would stay open. I did it to make you happy. And I wanted to take you on the weekend trip some day." Bo answers shyly. It hurts Bo to think that Lauren would believe that it was all about the bet. Not that Bo blames Lauren. Bo just feels so terrible about hurting Lauren like this and that Lauren now believes everything between them was a lie.
"I don't know what to believe Bo… I don't know how to believe you. You hurt me so much!" Lauren says resignedly. "I believed you. I tried to resist you because I knew I would get hurt, but you pursued me and convinced me to give you a chance. I believed you when you said you really wanted this, that I wasn't just another woman in a long line of women. I believed that what we had was real. All the moments we shared, I thought they were real. I opened up my heart to you, something that was so so difficult for me, especially with your track record. I fell for you. I thought you had fallen or were falling for me too. And then I find out that it was all just part of some bet. Nobody has ever hurt me like this, like you have. And you won't even explain it all to me, answer my questions. You left tonight. I think I deserve some answers. Give me at least that and then I will leave and we won't have to ever speak again." Lauren wipes away a couple of tears.
Bo grabs onto the edge of the kitchen table with both hands, looks down at the floor and slowly exhales. Then she straightens again and regains eye contact with Lauren.
"Give me a chance. Hear me out. Entirely. And if what you hear doesn't change your mind, then you can never speak to me again. You can't leave. I mean, with the storm, you can't actually leave, but when it is safe to leave I will let you leave and never contact you again, if that is what you want after hearing me out. You have no idea how sorry I am, and there are a lot of things I need to tell you, that I want to tell you. So, please hear me out and then you can do what you want."
"Fine." Lauren agrees.
"You are right, I shouldn't have walked out of Crystal's apartment tonight. I do that when things get though, I am not sure why, to protect myself I guess. But I should have stayed and listened to you, accepted you anger and hurt, and waited for you to hear my out. I should have stayed and been honest with you, opened up to you. I am sorry for not doing that. I just don't know how to." Bo explains.
"Just start somewhere." Lauren encourages.
Bo sighs. "You think it was all just about the bet, that it was some game to me, and it might have started that way but you need to believe me when I say that everything that happened between us was real."
"That's just very difficult to believe now. I mean, you made a bet that you could have sex with me! And you lied to me for months."
Bo's thoughts are going a million miles an hour and her heart is racing. How does she convince Lauren about how she feels and that all of it was real?
Suddenly she knows. "Okay. Ask me again."
Lauren is noticeably confused. "Ask you what?"
Bo continues to maintain eye contact. "You have asked me some questions, the 5 questions you were allowed to ask me. Ask me again…Ask me the questions again minus the one about my favourite childhood memory. Ask me the ones I wouldn't answer as well."
"Bo! I'm not playing any more of your games! And I already know the answer to those questions!" Lauren replies annoyed.
"Wait." Bo finds a piece of paper and a pen and starts writing, while carefully considering in which order to list the questions. When she is finished she puts down the pen and passes the paper across the kitchen table to Lauren. "Here. I want you to ask me these questions." Bo says determinedly. "Please."
Lauren hesitantly takes the piece of paper and reads the questions. "Bo, I just want the truth, an explanation. I don't want to play any more games. And as I said, I already know your answers to these questions. Please Bo, just be honest with me." She pleads.
"I will be honest, Lauren. I promise you that I will only tell you the truth. This is not a game. And you knew the answers, yes. But the answers have changed and some of the questions I didn't answer previously. By answering these questions I can hopefully give you what you need, an explanation. Please just ask me."
Lauren keeps staring Bo in the eyes before she lets out a sigh and looks down at the questions again. "Bo, some of this I don't think I want to know anymore."
"Will you just ask me?!"
"Fine!" Lauren hisses. "The first question; "Okay, so you obviously don't have a girlfriend right now, but when did you last have a girlfriend?""
"Well, I still haven't had a girlfriend, but if you remember my answer back then, I told you that I had never dated neither because I had never wanted to, and that I have never wanted a girlfriend."
"I remember"
Still maintaining eye contact Bo continues. "Well, that's no longer true. I still haven't had a girlfriend, no. But I have dated and I have wanted to date - you. When we went to the gala event you kept insisting it wasn't a date, and all I wanted was for it to be a date. You don't know this, but when you called me and asked me to go with you to the galla event, I had been spending the previous couple of days going mad, just ask Kenzi, trying to come up with a way to ask you out because all I wanted was to go out with you. So Lauren Lewis, you are the first woman I have ever wanted to date." Bo pauses and takes a deep breath. "And it was a date, we both know that it was. And even though it didn't go entirely as I would have wanted, we did have a great night for the most part and some of the moments we shared were wonderful. It was my first date ever, and it was one of the best nights of my life, minus some of the drama at the end. But Lauren, when you came to my apartment that night and I saw you in your dress, no words can describe how beautiful you were. You took my breath away. You gave me butterflies in my stomach and made me all weak in the knees. All those things that I thought were mostly just corny clichés from movies and books – I finally understood them, because I was experiencing them. And I have never ever felt so proud to be with someone, to walk into a room with someone, as I did when I walked in to the library with you. So Lauren Lewis, you were my first ever date. And when I took you on the date that I planned a couple of days later, it was also one of the best days of my life. I have never planned a date, but I wanted to plan one for you. I wanted to go on another date with you. Unfortunately that date did not end well either. But , just know that everything that happened at the galla and on the date was true and genuine. It was not part of the bet. The bet was called off long before that. I went on those dates with you and I wanted to go on those dates with you, because for the first time in my life I did want a girlfriend. So Lauren Lewis, you are the first woman that I have ever wanted to be my girlfriend…. Ask me the next question"
Lauren looks dazed and just keeps staring Bo in the eyes at first. She then reads the next question. "How many women have you had sex with? "
Bo cannot help but send Lauren an apologetic look. "I know that I never answered that question, Lauren. I didn't answer that question because I knew you wouldn't like the answer. The answer would have confirmed your belief at that time of me being a "player" or whatever, and it would have totally deferred you from letting me in. But if you want me to, I will tell you how many women I have had sex with, or approximately how many woman I have had sex with. If you really want me to tell you, I will. But before you decide whether or not you want to hear the answer, know that it is probably more than you suspect, but at the same time the number might as well be zero. It might as well be zero because I have never had sex with a woman that I had feelings for or was in love with or anything like that. I don't want this to sound like they are not wonderful women who deserve the best, of course they are, but they were not the right for me. So in that sense, you, Lauren Lewis, would have been my first. And to me, you would without any doubt or comparison have been the only one who really mattered. So, do you still want me to tell you?" Bo asks nervously.
After silently deliberating for a while Lauren arrives at her decision. "No. I don't need to."
Bo is very relieved. Not so much because she doesn't want to answer, more because Lauren's decision suggests that she might believe Bo when she tells her that she is different.
Lauren continues. "Next question is "What's the longest time you've gone without sex since you became sexually active?" But I'm not really sure that hearing the answer to this is going to help, Bo." Lauren says a bit frustrated.
"Well, last time the answer was 5 days. That's no longer the case. I haven't counted the days, but now it's about 35-40 days I believe." Bo pauses.
Lauren seems noticeably surprised by the answer.
Bo continues. "I wish it was longer. It should have been longer. Listen Lauren, I haven't really wanted or desired any other woman since I met you. The last person I had sex with was Janet., the woman we met at the galla event, and I only did it because I was struggling with the feelings I had for you. I kept telling myself that I wasn't falling for you, that I didn't have feelings for you, because I didn't know what to do with those feelings. And in an attempt to prove to Kenzi, but honestly mostly to myself, that I didn't have feelings for you, I had sex with her. But since then I haven't had sex with anyone. I only wanted you, Lauren. I still only want you, Lauren Lewis." Bo says honestly.
Lauren wipes away a tear. "Dammit, Bo! You are saying all of this, saying all the right things, but it doesn't change what happened. It doesn't change the fact that you were lying to me all this time."
Bo struggles to keep her emotions in check and to avoid crying herself. "Please Lauren, ask me the next question."
Lauren covers her eyes with her hand for a moment but then complies. "There are two questions listed together next; "Why?" and "Have you never been in love?"" Lauren says confused.
"Yes, I can't answer "why" without answering the other question as well." Bo takes a deep breath and exhales, preparing herself for the next part. "Listen, there are no words for how inconsiderate, immature, stupid, idiotic, and heartless the bet was. But it was before I knew you, it was before… I should have never made the bet. I can't put into words how difficult it was for me to see your heart break when you found out about the bet. The frustration, the panic, and the hopelessness I felt when you found out is indescribable. But it was all before I fell in love. It was before I fell in love with you, Lauren Lewis. I had never romantically had any real feelings for another person, until I met you. I didn't let myself get attached to any of the woman I met, I held them at a certain distance, I wasn't willing to let them in. I was too afraid to get hurt, too afraid that they would leave me, that they would see the real me and see that there wasn't anything in me worth loving." Bo can no longer hold back her tears and they start making their way down her cheeks. She wipes a few of them away before continuing.
"Lauren, you are the most intelligent woman I have ever met, so you have figured out by now that my abandonment issues and all of that stems from the abandonment by my parents when I was a kid. I don't want to go into all of that right now, but parents are supposed to love their children unconditionally, mine didn't. Not only did they leave me, they were also terrible parents until they did. So when my own parents couldn't even love me, why should other people be able to…? - So I have kept all the women I have met at a distance and just never allowed myself to get emotionally attached to them, fall for them. But then you came along…. And I don't think I had a choice anymore. I fell for you… And as soon as I accepted that, I called off the bet."
Lauren, who is crying just as much now too, stops her. "When did you call it off?"
"The day after you called me drunk from the bar toilets. So we never kissed or anything before after the bet was called off." Bo reassures.
"Why then? Why that day?" Lauren asks.
"Because that was when I realized, and accepted, that I had feelings for you. Do you remember when we played "never have I ever" at the cabin, I admitted to never having slept with another woman because sleeping with another person is very intimate to me?"
"I remember."
"Ask me again."
"What?"
"Ask me again."
Lauren's annoyance is obvious. "Have you ever slept with a woman?"
"Yes. I have slept with you, Lauren Lewis. That night when you called, drunk as f*** and pleaded me to have sex with you. I had wanted to have sex with you so badly for so long. I have never wanted I woman like I want you Lauren. But I couldn't. I would never take advantage of you like that. I took you home and you were just a mess. You were so sad and hurt about Evony. I hated seeing you like that, knowing that I couldn't do anything to make it better. But I did what I could. I stayed with you and made sure you were okay. And then you asked me to stay with you until you fell asleep as a sort of comfort. I couldn't say no to you. I lay down next to you and held you until you fell asleep. That's what you know, the parts that you can remember. But laying there with you, holding you, felt so good and made me feel at peace in a way that I can't remember feeling for the longest of times. I loved it. And I fell asleep like that, holding you. So Lauren Lewis, I slept with you. - And I loved it. I didn't wake up until the next morning, and when I woke up next to you I could no longer fight it. I could no longer fight the fact that I had feelings for you. I left before you woke up and went straight over to Vex and called off the bet."
Bo pauses for a second and walks around the kitchen table so that she is standing right in front of Lauren. "Once I realized that I had completely fallen for you, I was terrified. I freaked out, because I don't know anything about relationships, and I didn't want to hurt you. I'm not relationship material. I don't know how to do any of it. I didn't believe that I was capable of loving, and I knew that you deserved better. But also I have been terrified of letting you in, because it would hurt too much, but it is out of my hands. I am completely, utterly, head over heals, for the first time ever in my life, totally in love. I am in love with you Lauren Lewis." Another tear rolls down Bo's cheek. "The reason why my answers to these questions have changed, is because I have changed. My life changed the day I met a girl at a bar. I started changing the day I met you Lauren Lewis. My life hasn't been the same since our hands first touched and you turned me down. Nobody has ever rejected me like you did. I started feeling something that I had never felt, even if I didn't know what it was or what was happening. You have changed me Lauren Lewis."
The tears are now rolling fast down Lauren's face. Bo gently wipes a couple of them away, and as she does Lauren closes her eyes.
Bo decides to continue. "Before you say anything, I know the last question. At the cabin you asked me what my hopes and dreams are for the future. When you asked me that question at the cabin I couldn't give you any other answer than "I don't know", and I couldn't because it was the truth. But that is no longer the case." Bo takes Lauren's head into her hands and looks straight into her eyes. "As I said before my life has changed. I have changed. I do know what my hopes and dreams are for the future now. I want you Lauren Lewis. I want you to be a part of my future. I want to share my future with you. I have never been as happy as I am when I am with you. So more than anything I hope that you will be able to forgive me, so that I can show you that I, Bo Dennis, have fallen in love with you, Lauren Lewis."
Lauren starts to outright sob but doesn't say anything. After a while Bo gets a bit worried, she doesn't know if this is a good or bad sign.
"Lauren, talk to me." She pleads as she tries to get Lauren to look her in the eyes again.
Lauren gets up from the chair, the two of them standing very close. Lauren stares into Bo's eyes. It is impossible for Bo to read Lauren's expression. Then, without warning, Lauren grabs Bo's face and kisses her passionately and hungrily.
Lauren pulls away after a while. "Damn you Bo Dennis, for making me fall in love with you!"
Bo smiles. "You have? Do you forgive me?" She asks carefully while wrapping her arms around the blonde's waist.
Lauren looks at her, all serious. "You still haven't put on a shirt…. You tell me you love me, while standing there looking all sexy in just a bra and wet jeans! What do you expect me to do?! – I'm only human…" Both of them burst out into laughter before kissing each other passionately again. "Just never lie to me again like that."
"Oh Lauren, I promise you!"
Bo reaches down, grabs Lauren's thighs and lifts her up on the kitchen table. All the tension, all the lust, all the desire, all that has been going on the last couple of months is being unleashed in this moment. Bo grabs Lauren's beautiful golden locks and uses them to draw her even closer. They are already close, but Bo has an urge to be even closer to the blonde. And judging by the blonde's tight grip on Bo's waistband and her shoulders, Lauren feels the same way.
Lauren arches her back as Bo slowly and carefully places kisses all the way down her neck, across her chest, on her breasts and down her stomach while she slowly unbuttons her wet blouse. Bo meets Lauren's eyes again. "God, you are beautiful woman." Lauren gets back up and tightly holds Bo's face in her hands while kissing her fervently.
Bo lifts up Lauren from the table, letting Lauren wrap her legs around Bo's waist, and slowly Bo walks towards the stairs, never letting their lips part. But before ascending the stairs she stops and presses Lauren gently up against the wall. The blonde moans and grabs even tighter on to Bo's back. They stay there for a moment, losing themselves in each other and in the moment.
Bo starts to ascend the stairs and lead them up to her bedroom. Bo has been with many women, but this is different. This is so much more than just sex. For the first time ever, Bo makes love to a woman that night, and together the two of them weather the storm.
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AN: Thank you so much for reading! I really do hope that you liked it? Please let me know either way.
I had been looking forward to write this chapter for a long time. And from the beginning this had always been the point of the questions – to have Bo answer them again.
Now, I have to acknowledge that I unfortunately do not have as much time for writing as I would like to. I would still really like to continue this story if you guys are interested in me continuing it? But if I do, I can't promise when chapters are updated. Sometimes they might be 10 days apart, other times it may be weeks. Please let me know.
Any future charters would be a bit more upbeat and fun with them dating and trying the whole relationship thing.
Twitter: Susanne_KJ
