Author's Note: Happy New Year! I hope 2014 is a blessed year for all of you! Anyway, there is an Author's Note at the end of the chapter that I would appreciate very much if you read (I promise I wrote it for your benefit not mine). Swim Until You Can't See Land Thank you so much for your very complimentary review! I will be making references to the mythology, but expect me to twist it now and then. Yes, things seem to be going swimmingly between Sigyn and Loki now, but of course it would hardly be a good story if things stayed so smooth. I am very excited that you find the characters to be well-rounded and sympathetic! I have been really trying to achieve that! I hope you continue to enjoy the story. Snow White Queen Does Loki really know how to change Sif's hair or was he telling the truth? Who knows. Either way, Sif's hair is going to be staying black :) Sigyn certainly sees herself with her envious dragon captor, I just hope Loki doesn't decide he really does want to lock her in a tower. Something tells me Sigyn would not appreciate that! Your closing had me giggling. I hope you also have a very successful and lucky 2014! I look forward to your reviews as always. Reteka Hyuuga yes, it is tough to know which side to root for. They both have good points and not so good points. I couldn't resist a little dagger practice despite how cliché it is. I am a sucker for some clichés I suppose!
"Who said I was free to leave training?" Loki jested as Sigyn drug him down the hall.
"Why else would you have come over to me?"
"To save you from the wrath of Sif?" He tried.
"Doubtful. Besides, you had trained long enough." Sigyn returned.
"So what topic do you wish to discuss today?" Loki asked.
"Poetry!"
"Poetry!?" He replied, crinkling his nose. "Truly?"
"Yes, poetry! For once I don't wish to discuss something that is merely practical." Sigyn said excitedly while looking over her shoulder at Loki.
His expression went from a smile to a surprised look and Sigyn turned her head to see what had caused the change in his expression. She didn't turn fast enough however, and crashed into the King and Queen of Asgard. Sigyn was smaller than the Royal couple so she merely bounced off of them and back into Loki. She quickly released Loki's hand realizing that Odin and Frigga probably wouldn't approve of their son, a Prince, being drug around the castle by a young woman. She clasped her hands behind her back as innocently as possible.
"Forgive me AllFather! My Queen! I was not paying attention as I turned the corner…"
Sigyn trailed off and bit her lip, not sure of what to say.
"It is certainly all right Sigyn." The AllFather assured.
He seemed amused that Sigyn thought she could cause him any harm by simply running into him.
"Would your mother approve of you running in a dress I wonder? It is hardly Lady-like." Frigga asked with a small smile.
"Probably not." Sigyn confessed. "I will be more careful in the future."
"Well I shan't tell if you do not." The Queen assured in the tone of a close confidant.
"So where are the two of you headed in such a hurry?" The AllFather inquired of Loki.
"The library." Loki responded.
"Should you not be training with Thor and the others?" Odin pressed.
Sigyn thought she saw Frigga squeeze Odin's arm in reproach, but the AllFather seemed to ignore it.
"We just came from there." Sigyn defended a tad too forcefully.
Sigyn's hand almost shot to her mouth in surprise. She couldn't believe that she had just interjected herself into a conversation that was clearly meant to stay between father and son. Odin looked down to Sigyn and raised an eyebrow at her.
"You did, did you?"
"Yes, AllFather." She replied while continuing to look him square in the eye.
The AllFather's blue eye pierced hers for a few silent moments, and Sigyn began to fear that he would throw her in the dungeon or something for her insolence. Instead he simply nodded his head.
"Very well, off with you two." He dismissed with a wave of his hand.
Loki placed one hand on Sigyn's waist and gently grabbed her by the arm with the other before leading her off to the library. Neither of them spoke until they were safely in the privacy of what had become their own special room.
"Loki…I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to speak to your father like that! I had no right to…"
Loki placed a finger over her lips to silence her.
"I've never heard anyone other than my mother speak to my father in such a manner before. Not only did you interject yourself into a conversation that did not concern you, but you refused to back down, as any sensible person would have done, when the AllFather turned his gaze upon you."
Sigyn unconsciously flinched at Loki's verbal scolding. He might as well have struck her for the dread she now felt.
"Loki I…"
"Shhhh. Why are you so frightened?"
"I just don't want you to be upset with me. I already know I made a mistake…"
"A mistake? You have certainly made one, but not the one you think. You mistake my words for anger instead of what they truly are."
"…and what are they?"
"Admiration."
Sigyn found herself speechless at Loki's statement. He chuckled softly at her dumbstruck attitude and pulled her over to the table to sit.
"I believe this is the first time I have ever rendered you utterly speechless." He noted while looking for a book on one of the shelves.
"I find it difficult to believe that you are not upset with me."
"Why would I be upset? You took up my side against the AllFather himself. Few in Odin's own council would have been brave enough to do that, let alone the daughter of a nobleman. If you want my honest take on the situation, I think the AllFather was slightly impressed with your nerve."
Loki finally found the tome he had been searching for and he brought it to the table. They spent several hours taking turns reading the poems to one another and explicating them. They finally came across a poem that Sigyn was all too familiar with.
"Fidelity's Fault, now this one I know." She sighed.
"Would you like to skip it then?"
"No, but you should read it." She encouraged.
Loki pulled the book closer than began to read.
"The Spring welcomes all with its scents of lavender,
But the sweet smell dies in the harsh of Winter.
A dog welcomes its master with a shout,
But the greeting is silenced by time.
A young maiden crowned with myrtle is welcomed by her lover with a kiss,
But as her crown fades so does her love.
The fault with Fidelity is that she claims to be faithful,
When the only thing truly faithful is Death."
"That sounds more akin to an epitaph than a poem." Loki noted when he finished reading.
"Well this 'epitaph' happens to be my favorite." Sigyn noted.
"That is rather morbid." Loki pointed out.
Sigyn sighed.
"I find it fascinating. Most poetry dredges on and on about unrealistic ideals of love, yet this poem dares to ponder a topic that is far less pleasing to our sensibilities."
Loki still looked doubtful in her poetic tastes so she continued with her explanation.
"You have never lost anyone near to you, have you?"
Loki shook his head 'no'.
"Then you cannot possibly understand my fascination with death for you have never had to confront it. To you, and many like you, this poem treats death simply as a tragic ending. I however, see the hope in it. Death is a promise that despite how differently we each have lived, we will all have to face death in the end. I find it comforting to know how my story ends for it takes out so much of the uncertainty that life holds. I can live my life day-to-day confident in the knowledge that though I will make mistakes, those mistakes cannot alter the final fate I must face. You may not believe me now, but one day death will not seem such an enemy, and on that day you will welcome it as a friend."
Loki pondered her words silently for a bit.
"You are an intriguing young woman Sigyn Halldordóttir."
"And is that good or a bad?" She pried.
"It is most assuredly a good thing." He replied.
He closed the book of poetry.
"Sigyn, I need to know something…"
He looked to Sigyn for permission to continue, and Sigyn gave a nod of her head.
"If you had affections for someone… say Fandral for example, you would tell me would you not?"
"Well I suppose it would depend on the someone, but sticking to your example…yes, I would tell you if I had affections for Fandral."
"But there are some you wouldn't admit to me?"
"A few."
"Like whom?"
"Thor."
"You wouldn't tell me if you had affections for my brother?"
"No, I would fear that you would think I was merely using you to get to him. Though you needn't fear, I have no feelings, aside from those natural to friendship, towards your brother." She assured.
Loki studied her for a moment, but he seemed to believe her so he continued his line of questioning.
"What of me?"
"Excuse me?"
"Would you admit it if you had feelings for me?"
Sigyn took a deep breath. She had to tread cautiously here.
"No, I would not. I would fear that such an admission of affections, if not reciprocated, would be detrimental to our friendship. I would not be willing to sacrifice so important a relationship for such a fleeting fancy. If I was to have feelings for you however, I would show it in other ways."
"What ways?"
Sigyn shifted a little in her seat.
"Well it might be possible that I would tremble under your touch, or forget to breathe when you are near me. Maybe I would blush under your gaze, or perhaps I might…I might do this…"
She brought her hand up and Loki instinctively flinched. Instead of slapping the Prince as his subconscious must have told him she would, Sigyn placed her palm gently on his cheek. His skin felt cool under her touch, and Sigyn felt a shiver run through her body. She pulled her hand away in a flustered fashion and looked away from Loki even though she could still feel those emerald orbs boring into her.
"And what of you? Would you tell me if you had affections for a young lady?"
"Perhaps, but as you have already pointed out, it would depend on the young lady."
"So would you tell me if those affections were directed towards me?"
It was Loki's turn to think over his answer, and Sigyn could feel her stomach knot itself up in anticipation.
"No, but like you I would show it in my own subtle manner."
"How?" She asked breathlessly.
Loki stood from his seat and leaned over Sigyn.
"I would walk so close to you that our hands might just brush, or ghost my lips over your ear as I confide my darkest secrets to you. Though if I were to truly show you, it might look something like this…"
Loki rested his forehead on Sigyn's and their noses barely brushed. Her heart seemed to race, and she was certain that Loki could hear its frantic pattering. She tried to fight the urge to smile, laugh, and cry from frustration all at the same time. There was a pressure building in her chest that she was becoming less and less able to fight. He might as well have been torturing her with his close proximity. Without thinking, Sigyn bridged what little space existed between their lips, pressing hers softly and naïvely into his. The contact only lasted a moment before Sigyn pulled back. She rose from her chair and hastily put some space between herself and Loki.
"Forgive me My Prince, I do not know what came over me. I beg that you forgive my lack of judgment and give me your leave so I may return home."
The words spilled out of her mouth, and she was out the library doors before Loki had time to reply. She had never reached the stables in so short a time as she did that afternoon, and the journey home was as fast as she could urge Roan to go. The first place she headed when she reached the house was Frida's room. She knocked on her sister's door with urgency and practically threw the door open the moment Frida beckoned her to come in.
"I kissed Loki…" she stated before Frida could welcome her.
Frida stared at Sigyn with her eyes wide.
"You did what?" She cried, dropping her needlework onto her lap.
"I kissed Loki." Sigyn replied before throwing herself on Frida's bed and burying her face in the covers.
An unexpected laughter filled the air and Sigyn looked up to give Frida an annoyed look.
"It's not funny Frida!"
"On the contrary my dearest Sigyn, it is very funny. I wish I could have witnessed it. Watching you pull the Prince into a fervent kiss would have been quite the thing to see!"
"That is not how it happened!" Sigyn defended with a pout.
"Whatever you say Sigyn." Frida replied in a tone that said she didn't believe Sigyn. "So is he any good?"
"Good at what?"
"At kissing Sigyn, kissing."
"I don't know… I don't really have anyone to compare him too, and it was so quick that I wouldn't have had time to compare him even if I did."
Frida picked up her needlework again.
"How did he respond?" She pried.
"I don't know…"
"What do you mean 'you don't know'?"
"I didn't stay to see his reaction. I kissed him and ran."
Frida began to chuckle.
"Well what if he enjoyed it? Wouldn't he be disappointed that you didn't stay to finish what you started?"
"Frida!" Sigyn gasped.
"I'm not saying you had to sleep with him Sigyn, but a peck on the lips and nothing more? Why that was just cruel!"
Sigyn couldn't believe what Frida was saying.
"Frida I highly doubt Loki appreciated being kissed like that… maybe I should write him an apology…"
"You will do no such thing Sigyn! I mean I wouldn't suggest doing it again, but I highly doubt that Loki minded having you kiss him."
"Oh don't worry, it will not be happening again. I just hope that it doesn't make things, you know, awkward between us." Sigyn confessed.
"Trust me Sigyn, things will only be awkward if you allow them to be." Frida assured.
Deep down, Sigyn hoped Frida was right on all accounts.
Author's Note: Well this is the first time I have used an Author's Note at the end of a chapter in a story that is still under progress. I just wanted to explain something regarding the chapter that I didn't want to address till you read it. I know some people use stories and poems inside their stories to hint at what is to come in their story, but that was not my purpose with the poem. Sigyn's fascination with the poem and its implications stems from the fact that in many ways Sigyn is more mature than Loki despite the fact that he is older than she is. Loki has grown up in a highly regulated and gilded world while Sigyn has experienced events and emotions that he has never had to deal with. I just wanted to address that before anyone started to panic.
