"And that's where I found you," Perry says quietly, recognising my current state. "In the forest, barely conscious."

I don't reply. He massages my shoulder briefly. "I'll leave you alone for a while so you can get to grips with this."

He leaves.

I curl up on my bed and cry and cry and cry and cry until I have no more tears left and then I cry some more.

Ferris…

I can't believe he sacrificed himself for me. He rejected his chance at freedom and gave it to me so that I could be free. Then he was taken away and most likely killed for it…

He was my only friend in there and he gave up his freedom for me.

Now I know where I got my depression from.

The anxiety started with the separation anxiety I got from being ripped away from my parents.

The memory loss is my brain trying to get rid of the memories of those two excruciatingly painful experiences.

The depression is from my loss of Ferris.

That's why I am the way I am.

I am a former test subject with both physical and emotional scars to show for it.

I was torn away from my parents as a child, I was injected with a horribly painful substance, I was electrocuted more times than I can count, and I lost my closest friend who surrendered his chance at freedom so that I could have it.

That's why I am the way I am.

My scars should have made me stronger but they didn't. They taught me that life is hard but instead of being toughened from it, I was weakened. I received anxiety, depression, memory loss, and all sorts of painful memories that I don't want.

That's why I am the way I am.

I get up off the bed and run out of the shed. I run as fast as I can and I don't care where I'm going. I don't want to live with all these painful memories. My parents, my physical torture, Ferris. It's all too much. I don't want the memories. I want to forget.

I want to forget.

I see the car too late. It hits me and sends me flying heavily onto the sidewalk, injuring me badly. My legs and arms are numb, my head is dizzy, and I can barely move. I struggle to my feet and lean on a trash can for support. Even though I'm not entirely feeling all that anxious, my inner voice tries to help.

Judy, you're hurt. You need to find your way back home.

I don't want to.

Judy-

I said I don't want to! I don't want to live with these memories anymore!

Judy, you've only remembered for a few minutes. Before that, you lived four years without remembering why you are what you are. You need to be honest with yourself about how bad these memories feel so you can move on. You need to think about it and think about it until you feel better about it.

I don't want to feel better about it! I want these memories gone!

You can try and do something about that later. For now, you need to make your way back home. You know I'm right, Judy. You won't survive out here for much longer.

…I know. I need to find home.

Good. Now, where do you live?

I live with my mate. I live with-

Oh no…

Oh no…!

Oh no!

OH NO!

WHO DO I LIVE WITH?

Judy, breathe slow!

I HAVE A MATE BUT I CAN'T PICTURE HIM AND I DON'T REMEMBER HIS NAME!

Calm down! Think logically!

NOOOOOO!

Judy, get up! You can't lie there for much longer or you'll die of your injuries!

I don't care! I don't have anywhere to go!

Yes you do! You may not be able to remember him but you have a mate who loves you and cares about you and he'll come and find you! You have to help him! Get up and start walking back the way you came!

What's the point? I'm going to die anyway. And that's good. I'll finally forget. The pain will be over.

Don't let Ferris's sacrifice be in vain!

…Ferris…

Judy, please. Think about Ferris. He wouldn't want you to forget him. He would want you to remember what he did for you. He sentenced himself to death to allow your freedom. Don't waste it, Judy. Don't waste the opportunity he gave you.

I-I won't…

Good, Judy! Get up and walk. You can do it. Quickly!

I'm trying…it hurts…

Of course it hurts, you were hit by a car!

Not helping. Okay…there's the park…but it looks different…

Maybe you're on a different side?

Oh no…I don't know which side I'm on…

Breathe slow, Judy.

Breathing hurts, inner voice! Everything hurts! I'm not going to make it…

Think of your mate!

I DON'T HAVE A MATE!

Judy…!

I-I can't remember my mate…I'm such a horrible person…I can't remember…I have no home…

Yes you do! Just please hold on!

I can't.

I'm so sorry.

My mate…

I'm leaving. The pain is too much. My heart is failing. I'm not going to make it.

JUDY!