'Cause you are the piece of me

I wish I didn't need

...

If our love is tragedy

Why are you my remedy?

If our love's insanity

Why are you my clarity?

- Clarity by Zedd ft. Foxes


Crashing his car into the river seemed like such a great choice at the time. (Admittedly, he did miss it every now and then, but cars could easily be replaced.) Harley however, could not. Joker knew that Batman would save her, but if he had known where the Bat would be taking Harley, he might have reconsidered those choices he made.

Days passed and he worked on an escape plan to break her out of Arkham. What do you mean she's not here? Where else would she be? No one knew. It didn't matter how many he asked or how many he killed. There was no one who could tell him. Oh well, she'll probably turn up soon.

Days turned into weeks and during those weeks, he took out his rage on a lot of people and went out on killing sprees. Even his most trusted henchman Johnny Frost had to put up with a lot more than usual. One of those things being having to listen to his boss's complaints and tantrums. Why hasn't she come back yet? She should be here by now! Johnny, hand me that crowbar, will ya?

Weeks turned into months and the killing sprees stopped all of a sudden. The people of Gotham lived in fear, choosing to stay indoors and wait for his next move. But it never came. Batman could take it when the Joker was up to his shenanigans. Whatever the Joker did, it was always unexpected and to have him simply go into hiding was most unexpected indeed. That was something the Batman could not take. When it came to Joker's crew, they were always on edge. They were so used to having him yell at them or give them orders, but now there was nothing. Joker had locked himself up in his and Harley's room for days on end and no one knew what he did in there. Still, they were expecting him to one day turn up in the doorway and assign them with duties, as per usual. That day never came.

Worried for his employer, there was one time that Johnny walked into the room which the Joker was occupying and keeping himself isolated. He wished he hadn't. Not once had he ever expected to find the Joker of all people in such a state. On the floor, there was a circle of various items: guns, knives of all shapes and sizes, but also roses and… baby clothes? Johnny did not want to dwell on that. His eyes fell on the several computer screens that were lit up at the very edge of the circle. All of which were displaying her face. In the very middle of the circle was where the Joker lay – all naked and in a fetal position. Just like a newborn baby, except this one was tattooed and anything but a baby. Johnny had never seen him so… vulnerable before. Vulnerable wasn't really a word one associated the Joker with. There was also a piano in the room which had been torn apart and when Johnny took a step forward, he stepped on one of the many playing cards strewn across the floor. He stopped himself as he noticed the Joker whimper. Yes. The Joker. Whimper. In that moment, Johnny knew what had to be done. No orders needed. He turned on his heel and quietly left the room.

Joker looked at himself in the mirror as he put on the red lipstick. It didn't keep his lips from feeling dry, however. No matter how much lipstick he put on, there was only one thing that could help – her lips on his. Today, he was wearing a white shirt with a brown vest on top, black pants and black gloves. He had to look presentable in front of Harley. He went to sit down in the middle of his perfectly arranged circle. She would be so proud of him once she saw it. He closed his eyes and waited for her to come.

"Harley? Where are you, pumpkin pie?"

"I'm right here, puddin'." She came to sit with him. She cupped his face and frowned, for it pained her seeing him this sad. "Where is your smile?" she asked. He chuckled lightly. How silly she was.

"Why, you took it with you, of course! But now that you're here… may I have it back?"

"You'll have to come closer for that," she whispered and bit her lower lip. Of course. Of course she would keep his smile on her own and now he would get it back. He would get her back. Without her, there was no reason to smile anyway. Their lips met and he felt whole again.

"I missed you so much," he purred. Harley leaned in for another kiss, but Joker tensed up when he heard footsteps. Someone was coming. The door opened.

Joker stirred back to life, pointing his gun at the intruder. Oh. It's just Johnny. Indeed it was. Johnny sat down to face his boss, trying to ignore the fact that he had drawn a black smile around his mouth. "Where is she?" Joker asked, his voice dark and gravelly. He lowered his gun, but was ready to raise it again should he not get the information he so desperately craved. Complicated? Well, I've never heard that one before. Not just her, huh? Don't test me, Johnny, just get to the point! Louisiana? Out of all places, she's in fucking Louisiana? What do we do, you ask? "We're going for a drive."

He breathed in and out, slowly taking in the fact that he wouldn't have to look for her anymore. He would see her again. Soon. His smile took form once again. It had been so long. He lay down in his perfect circle and there it was – his laugh. Oh, how I've missed you.


A/N: I was inspired to write this one-shot when I saw a piece of concept art for Suicide Squad. If you go to my tumblr (quinn-of-coney-island) I'm sure you can find it there if you scroll down a couple pages. (Let's just say it gave me major feels. I'm not crying, you're crying.) So this is my attempt at trying to enter Joker's mind and in this case it was very painful. Emotionally painful that is.

I also have to say thank you to everyone for following and reviewing! I never expected to get so many readers! And all of your kind words make me so happy, you have no idea! I take my time to answer your reviews, because I want you all to know just how much it means to me! I wish I could answer all the guest reviewers as well, but since I can't, I'm saying my thanks to you guys now: thank you! 3