She remembers talking to post-Chronos Mick through the clear, shatterproof material of the Waverider brig. She remembers talking to Savage.
This hurts more.
He's sitting in a characteristic Snart sprawl against one wall, one long leg tucked underneath him, one stretched out before him. He's somehow reacquired that damned ball he'd been throwing around so long ago in the hold, but he's just tossing it from hand to hand, eyes distant.
They snap to her, though, when she enters, and those restless hands still.
She sits on the bench nearest him and takes a deep breath, trying for some serenity. That's been in short supply for a while now.
When she looks up, he's watching her with an expression that almost breaks her, something rawer than she's ever seen on him before...except, perhaps, at the Oculus.
"Hey."
"Hey." He shifts a little to face her a little better, the expression modulating into something a little more guarded. "Mick, huh?"
"Mick," she confirms.
A smile briefly touches his face. "Did he tell you to stop being an as..."
"Ha, ha, very funny." But she can't help but smile back, a little.
They regard each other in silence. She knows her eyes are lingering on his face, but his are doing the same to hers, so...
"Mick says you started remembering after you shot at me in 1969," she says suddenly.
He winces, and starts to say something, but she waves it away. "It was battle. If what you say is true, you didn't really remember at that point. What I want to know," she leans forward, holding eye contact, "is what happened after."
His eyes flicker away. Then back.
"I remembered the kiss first," he says suddenly.
The air seems very still.
"At the Oculus," she whispers.
"Umhmm." His eyes close. "I thought I'd never seen you before Thawne recruited me, but I couldn't ask any of the… them. And it kept happening. A bar brawl, throwing someone into a jukebox. You were there. So was Mick. There was a song playing."
She smiles; she can't help it. His eyes open; his lips quirk. "Then it was the Vanishing Point. The ships." The smirk vanishes; his shoulders tense. "And 'me and you.' "
She says nothing. He continues.
"Eventually, I'd wake up every day with a headful of new memories. Mick as Chronos. Talking to my younger self. Lisa after the Pilgrim. The Old West. Jax, Stein, Raymond, Hunter. Saying a big, old 'fuck you' to the Time Masters, there at the end."
She winces this time. He pauses, eyes on her, then continues.
"That was it, really. After that, it was all there, I think…except for a gap between the Oculus and the day Thawne showed up in Central City to recruit me."
"Why did you accept?"
He pauses, then sighs. "Sara, I had a nine-month gap in my memories. I had no idea where Mick was. Even my safe houses had nine months worth of grime built up, and no one I'd worked with knew where I'd been either. Including my sister. I was pissed."
"And Thawne…what? Offered you a score?"
The scorn in her voice makes him pause again, but then he shrugs. "Yes. I was a crook, Sara. What did you think I was?"
Something there, in his voice…
"A hero," she tells him, standing up. "You were a hero."
"I wasn't then."
"And what are you now?"
She waits, but he doesn't respond. His eyes are on the floor.
But as she walks out the door, she hears him whisper, "I don't know."
