Thanks MyLadyDay and Vergina-spva for beta'ing


Chapter 6

Slowly, Izo pulled back, another wave of relief washing over him when he saw that Thatch's eyes were open. He was awake. He was really awake.

Thatch looked at him blurrily, blinking his eyes. "Izo," he muttered.

His voice was hoarse, but it was Thatch's voice, a voice Izo thought he might never hear again. Just hearing it made him tear up, but he wouldn't cry, not again. He had done that enough these past few days. He just nodded, taking Thatch's hands into his.

"Wha… Why…?" Thatch mumbled.

Izo's heart was beating fast. Thatch seemed to have some trouble saying what he wanted to say, but just to hear his voice was more than he could have asked for.

"Why aren't you wearing make-up?"

Perhaps it was the relief, or the days' worth of pent up worry and frustration, but suddenly, Izo got irrationally angry. "That's the first thing you ask me after being in a coma for a week?!" he yelled.

Thatch blinked at him. "Coma?"

All the anger drained from him as quickly as it had appeared, and Izo moved forward to wrap his arms around Thatch. "I'm sorry," he whispered, and despite his resolve, tears welled up in his eyes when Thatch hugged him back.

"Izo," Thatch said after a moment of silence, "what happened?"

Izo let go of him and sat down on the edge of the bed. He had every intention to tell Thatch about that traitor Teach, but the words stuck in his throat. He let out a sob and covered his mouth with his hand. His whole body was trembling, and he knew that he would break down as soon as he opened his mouth.

Thatch's brow pulled into a worried frown and he took Izo's hand in his. "It's okay, you can tell me later. I just–" He winced in pain when he moved slightly.

"Are you okay?" Izo asked worriedly.

"Yeah, it's just my back…" Thatch trailed off. "That's why I'm here, isn't it? I don't remember hurting my back."

"I should get a doctor to check you out," Izo said and pressed the button next to Thatch's bed to call a nurse, one he usually forgot was there.

Almost immediately, a nurse came in and she all but squealed when she saw that Thatch was awake. "Izo, I'm so happy for you!"

He smiled at her. "Could you please fetch a doctor?"

"Of course!"

Thatch raised his eyebrow, a gesture Izo hadn't realised he had missed so much, but all he could do was shrug. He had befriended a lot of the nurses' staff while he was here and several female doctors as well.

The nurse came back within a few minutes with a doctor. While Izo usually got along very well with women, doctor Kureha was one of the few people that actually terrified him. He immediately stepped aside when she moved to the bed to manhandle Thatch – because that was the only accurate description of her examinations.

"Izo!" Thatch called out, and suddenly, he looked scared. "Don't go."

Izo took his hand, but one look from Kureha told him he was in the way. "I'll just be outside to call the others, okay? I'll be back soon, I promise."

Thatch nodded, visibly relieved.

Izo walked to the exit. The news had travelled fast, because everywhere, Izo was congratulated and hugged by staff members and long-term patients. Izo smiled and had trouble not to start crying again.

When he finally made it outside, he looked up Pops' number in his phone. As soon as he heard Pops' soothing voice, he broke down. He tried to tell his father that Thatch was awake, and by some miracle, Pops actually understood him through his sobbing. He assured Izo that he would call the others and that Izo should stay with Thatch for now. He didn't have to tell Izo twice.

After Pops had hung up, Izo took a deep breath and blew his nose in a handkerchief. He still couldn't believe this was actually happening. Thatch was alive, he was awake. Perhaps everything would be okay, after all.

Taking another deep breath, he called Perona as well, despite the hour. She would want to know anyway.

Perona answered the phone almost right away, and she promised to stop by soon. She and Thatch weren't exactly close, though they tried to get along for Izo's sake. It wasn't that they didn't like each other, they just didn't have much in common, except for Izo. Still, Thatch would appreciate the gesture.

After they had hung up, Izo made his way inside again. Kureha seemed to be finished with her examination, and by the looks of it, she was pleased with the results.

"He'll need lots of rest, but it looks like he'll make a full recovery. Now, are you gonna ask me how I look so young or what?"

"Later," Izo hastily said and walked into Thatch's room again.

Thatch was looking tired, but he smiled when he saw Izo. "You came back."

"Of course I did." Izo walked towards the bed. "The doctor is very optimistic."

"Yeah… Izo, she said I was stabbed in the back?" Thatch asked with a frown.

Izo sighed and crawled onto the bed. Out of habit, Thatch moved over as much as his current condition allowed.

"What do you remember?" Izo asked.

Thatch frowned. "I… I think I was home… No, I just came home, because I had spent the weekend at Nojiko–" He sat up straight, wincing in pain again. "Nojiko! I have a girlfriend!"

Izo's mouth pulled into a thin line.

"Don't I?" Thatch continued hesitantly. "Oh God, don't tell me–"

"Nojiko is fine. Everyone is," Izo hastily reassured him.

"Everyone?" Thatch asked worriedly.

Izo sighed and then smiled. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't confuse you, or cause you needless worry. Everything is fine." Though, to be honest, he had to admit that he hadn't even thought about calling Nojiko. He probably should.

With a sigh, he made to move off the bed, but Thatch's arms wrapped around him prevented him from doing so.

"Don't go," he whispered again.

"Okay. Okay, I won't go," Izo reassured him and laid back down on the bed. "I'll stay here." He wrapped his arms around Thatch's torso, like he had done so many times before. Thatch's warmth and steady breathing always soothed him.

Sleep was pulling at him, but he tried to fight it. What if he woke up and this had all been a dream? What if Thatch had never been awake?

But Thatch's presence was soothing, and during the past week, he hadn't gotten much sleep. Through half-lidded eyes, he looked up at Thatch, who had already fallen asleep. Perhaps Izo could permit himself a few minutes of shut-eye…


A warm, large hand on his back gently woke him in a familiar manner. Izo pushed himself up on his elbows a little and rubbed his eyes. "I wasn't sleeping," he mumbled.

Pops smiled warmly at him. "You were, and I'm glad about that. But this isn't the place."

Izo nodded and sat up.

As soon as he lost Izo's warmth, Thatch started to stir and opened his eyes. "Izo, where…? Pops!"

"Welcome back, son."

Izo looked on endeared as their father hugged Thatch tightly. Silently, not to disturb their moment, Izo went to the waiting room, where he was greeted by all his brothers, including Ace.

"So, it's really true?" Haruta asked.

Izo nodded, too overwhelmed by emotions to talk. He was immediately caught in a group hug, something that didn't happen often, but that was a good thing, because every time it did, Izo wasn't sure if he would survive.

They were shushed by a nurse, because it was the middle of the night and other patients needed rest too. But since they were all Thatch's direct family, they couldn't be sent away. However, they needed to promise to go inside with only one or two at the time, and if Thatch got tired, they needed to leave.

Pops emerged from the room after a while. "You can go see him now."

Marco and Ace went inside first, while Pops took a seat in the hallway between the brothers. He looked tired, but happy, like everyone else, and wrapped an arm around Izo.

When Marco and Ace came back out again, Jozu and Vista took their places, but Izo barely noticed them leave as his eyelids slowly slipped shut again.

He perked up when someone gently shook his shoulder. When he opened his eyes, Jozu was standing in front of him. "Come on, let's go."

"Go?" he asked confusedly. "Go where?"

Jozu smirked. "So you were asleep."

"No, I wasn't!"

"Izo," Pops said, "you need some decent sleep, so Jozu will bring you home."

"No, but Pops! I need to stay! What if he needs me?" Izo said almost desperately.

"Thatch needs his rest as well, and here he'll get all the care he needs, but you won't. Go home, Izo, and get some sleep. You deserve it." Pops gently touched his cheek.

Izo looked around. All his brothers were looking at him with a mixture of encouragement and worry. He hadn't realised before, but he must have made them all worry a lot, while at the same time they worried about Thatch. He shouldn't have done that to his family.

Slowly, he nodded and took Jozu's extended hand. "Goodnight then, I guess."


Izo had immediately fallen asleep as soon as his head had hit the pillow, and the next morning, he slept in late.

When he finally woke up, he resisted the urge to call the hospital to see if yesterday had really happened. It had to have, otherwise Izo would have never gone home.

It was when he was extensively brushing his hair that he realised it, and the brush fell out of his hand.

He had kissed Thatch, and not in a brotherly fashion. Thatch hadn't pushed him away or anything, rather, he didn't seem to realise what was happening, but that was only to be expected since he just got out of a fucking coma.

Izo closed his eyes and buried his face in his hands. What if Thatch realised later, just like he himself had? He had been too overjoyed at the time to comprehend his own actions.

He couldn't face Thatch anymore.

It was not that he thought Thatch would hate him or be disgusted by him, because Thatch wasn't that kind of person. However, he was the type of person who wanted everyone to get along and was happy, which would bring him into a dilemma. He would want to keep Izo in his life, but also be aware that spending time together might hurt Izo, and he would feel guilty about doing so. It would only lead to awkwardness and mutual feelings of guilt.

Izo had long ago accepted that there was just no getting over Thatch, and that Thatch would never feel the same way about him. He could bear that, knowing that at least Thatch was happy, as the alternative was both of them being miserable.

It wasn't the first time he thought Thatch found out about his feelings, but even he couldn't be this thick-headed, could he?

Izo let out a humourless chuckle. All those times he had thought Thatch had figured it out and almost had a heart attack, especially short after he had realised his feelings. It had been false alarm every time back then, but…

Izo decided he wouldn't go back to the hospital, at least today, and tried to get his mind off Thatch by painting. He was behind on his work, since he had spent so much time at the hospital, but Perona, who worked part-time as his assistant, had cleared his schedule for last week, so he had no missed appointments with clients and patrons.

Painting gave him the distraction he needed, until midday, when he received a text from Thatch. It contained many spelling errors, probably due to the coma, but the message was clear: Thatch wanted to know if he would stop by today because they needed to talk.

Izo stared at the text for a while, trying to calm his racing heart. It didn't mean anything necessarily, right? Maybe Thatch wanted to talk about something else. Maybe he was just bored. Maybe…

Finally, he wrote a text back, saying that he didn't have time today, but he would stop by as soon as he could. He didn't like lying to Thatch, but at least he could convince himself that he indeed was busy, because he was a week behind on his painting.

After dinner – the first dinner he made himself and ate at home that week – Thatch suddenly called. Izo stared at the vibrating device, trying to take calm, deep breaths.

Izo sighed. Whatever the reason was for Thatch to call, Izo couldn't ignore him. He didn't even want to. He desperately wanted to have him in his life, even if it was awkward.

Before he could change his mind, he picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey." Thatch's voice still sounded like he had a bit trouble talking, but he didn't sound as tired anymore. He didn't sound happy either, and Izo fidgeted with his clothes.

It stayed silent at the other end of the line.

"Thatch?" Izo asked, as it felt like a stone dropped on his stomach. There wouldn't be anything wrong, would there? "You wanted to talk about something?"

"Yeah…"

Izo sighed in relief. Thatch was still there.

"Izo… They told me."

Izo's blood ran cold. There weren't many people who knew about his feelings for Thatch, and none of them would spill his secret, would they?

He forced himself to breath normally. "W-who told you what?"

"The guys. They told me what happened. Why I'm here."

Izo remained silent for a second. On the one hand, he was relieved that Thatch still had no clue about his true feelings, but on the other, Thatch sounded upset, and why wouldn't he be? He had learned that the man he had considered his friend was the reason he was in the hospital, not to mention said person was the cause of Ace's and Marco's injuries and was dead now.

Thatch made a choking sound, and it took Izo a moment to realise he was crying. He didn't know what to say. Thatch had been upset before, of course, but it was usually about women and he got over it pretty quickly. But Izo couldn't remember the last time Thatch had cried, not even when he was a child.

"Thatch," he said softly. Thatch was probably still a bit affected by the coma, but still, hearing him like that broke Izo's heart.

Thatch took a shaky breath. "They also told me that you were the one to find me. I'm so sorry, Izo! I'm sorry you had to see me like that…"

"You have nothing to apologise for, Thatch!" Izo said, but the memory of Thatch, lying in a growing pool of his own blood was burned onto his retina and would remain the subject of his nightmares for a long time.

"You saved my life, Izo... If you hadn't been there, I wouldn't be here either." Thatch's voice was barely above a whisper.

Izo swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in his throat, but Thatch's words brought him on the verge of crying as well. He had cried more than enough this past week, but he couldn't help it.

"If the roles were reversed… If I had seen you like that, had to sit on your bedside for days, not knowing if you'd come back to me… Izo, I wouldn't have been able to do it," Thatch continued, his voice trembling. "I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"It doesn't matter anymore," Izo said suddenly with a newfound firmness in his voice. "Teach has paid for what he did, and you showed him by not surviving one, but two attempts on your life. He's worthless. The only thing that matters is that you're alive, and I'm never letting anyone take you from me again."

Thatch was silent for a moment, but when he started to talk again, his voice sounded much lighter. "You're amazing."

Izo's lips curled into a smile. He was glad to hear Thatch returning to his normal self. "Of course."

"I love you, Izo."

It felt like his heart would beat out of his chest. He knew Thatch loved him, like a friend and a brother, but still, the words did something to him. Thatch was very open about his feelings, usually through gestures, but he had never said those words out loud before – not sober anyway, and when he was drunk, Thatch suddenly loved a lot of people.

Finally, he took a deep breath and somehow managed to keep his voice even when he said, "I love you too." It was the truest thing he had ever told Thatch.