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Sonic Z
Created: May 11, 2009 – Completed: June 29, 2009 (Revised: April 7, 2013)
[Disclaimer: Sonic and characters from the franchise are owned by SEGA. Any other characters, not owned by SEGA, are owned by their respectful owners.]
(Warning this may contain strong language and sexual content, viewer discretion is advised.)
Sonic Z episode 2
"The LOLing Episode"
Big the Cat is walking down the street listening to "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani.
Big: I still don't know what a "Hollaback Girl" is.
Inuyasha: Maybe because it's YOUR MOM.
Big: What the… where'd YOU COME FROM?!
Inuyasha: That's not what she said. [Runs away.]
Big: [Stands confused without motion]
Knuckles: What up, big gangsta? [Pats Big's shoulder roughly.]
Big: Umm… nothing much. By the way, what's a "Hollaback Girl"?
Knuckles: (shrugs) I don't know, but hey have you been getting some lately. [Moves eyebrows up and down.]
Big: (laughs) Yeah, I got some from Amy and Cream.
Knuckles: Oh hell yeah! How does it taste?
Big: [Rubs stomach.] Mighty damn tasty. (licks lips) I want some more of their cakes.
Knuckles: I know right, they even made some at the party, why didn't you come?
Big: (gets nervous) Umm… to be honest I was masturbating… eww sorry…
Tails: (yelling) Virgin!
Big: (yelling) Well at least I'm not gay!
Tails: (yelling) SCREW YOU!
Big: Yeah, I already know that I screwed your mom last night.
Tails: [Pimp-slaps Big.] B*tch, don't talk about MY MOMMA! [Pimp-slaps him again.] What's my name, b*tch!?
Big: (scared and crying) Daddy stop!
Tails: Shut up, b*tch! [Slaps him again.]
Knuckles: Holy Tikal! Tails you got mad props, homie. [Gives him dap.]
Tails: [Holds his Pimp cane.] Thanks, brah.
Knuckles: So… (snickers) hahaha you're a Pimp… for gay dudes. (laughs loudly)
Tails: [Stares at Knuckles and Pimp-slaps him.]
Knuckles: [Falls to ground.] (sniff) I'm sorry, daddy. Please DON'T HURT ME!
Tails: (chuckles) Shut up, b*tch. [Slaps both of them.]
Sonic and Amy are in a flower field.
Amy: (sniffs flower) Mmm… isn't this pretty, Sonic?
Sonic: Hell no, as a matter a fact this is really gay. [Falls asleep.]
Amy: (gets mad) Ugh! (thinks) Hmm… I got something for you. (laughs evilly)
Sonic wakes up in an Alien Spaceship.
Sonic: (wakes up) Hmm… what the… [Is tied face-down to a table.] Where am I?
Alien #1: He's awake #2.
Alien #2: Excellent. Let the anal probing begin.
[A big machine is slowly turning to Sonic's behind.]
Sonic: (struggles to get free) Oh hell no, you're not gonna stick that in my ass!
[Alien #1 presses a button and a dildo comes out of the machine and is slowly twisting around.]
Sonic: (struggles) You guys are really f*cked up you know that!
[Alien #1&2 smiles as the dildo enters Sonic's rectum.]
Sonic: (screams in pain) GOD! F*CK! B*TCH! A*SHOLES THAT SH*T F*CKING HURTS, DAMMIT!
At the flower field…
Amy: (evil laugh) Heheheh I can't wait to see the expression on his face once he knows I buried him.
Rouge: (laughs) Yeah, I know right. Girl, you are putting your man in check.
Amy: [Looks around.] Where is he?!
[Rouge checks the spot where Sonic was sleeping and a black spot is left behind.]
Rouge: (smiles) Looks like he's been abducted.
Amy: You mean…
Rouge: Yeah.
Amy & Rouge: Anal rape for Sonic. (laughs loudly)
Back at the spaceship…
Sonic: Ugh! Amy, is that you? This is not funny.
Alien #2: Amy? Who's that? I'm #2.
Alien #1: And I'm #1.
Sonic: What the f*ck?! Y'all… really are aliens?!
Alien #1&2: (nods)
Sonic: (screams) AHHHHH!
[Sonic is dropped off in the middle of the woods and the spaceship disappears.]
Sonic: Ugh! (rubs butt) God d*mn my ass hurts.
Shadow: What are you doing here, Sonic?
Sonic: Shadow… I was just…
Shadow: (interrupts) Never mind, I don't want to hear your life's story. Why the hell are you rubbing your ass? And where is Maria?
Sonic: For one, I got anal raped; second, I don't know.
Shadow: Number 1, that's really gay and number 2, b*tch best be getting my money.
Sonic: Oh God no… you're a pimp too?
Shadow: Better f*cking believe it.
[Naruto comes out of nowhere and chokes Shadow.]
Shadow: (choking) Uh! What the f*ck is this!
Naruto: You copied my catch phrase, believe it!
Sonic: I thought it was "dattebayo!"
Naruto: (looks at Sonic) Don't make me kill you too.
Sonic: (scared) Umm… ok. 0.o [Backs away slowly then runs.]
Shadow: (struggling) Sonic you p*ssy get back here!
Naruto: Your ass is MINE!
Shadow: (screams) AHHHHHHH!
Chris Crocker: LEAVE SHADOW ALONE! [Gets shot, falls to the ground, and dies.]
Shadow: [Puts gun away.] (sigh) God I hate him. [Hears screaming.] Oh God NO!
Fred: (high-pitch voice) HEY, IT'S FRED!
Naruto: [Points kunai to his neck.]
Shadow: [Points gun to his head.]
Wherever Tails is at…
Tails: [Pimp-slaps Cream.] B*tch, where's my money?
Cream: (cries) I'm sorry Candy-Daddy Tails, but nobody has been wanting this p*ssy lately.
Tails: B*tch, no excuses! [Pimp-slaps her again.]
Cream: [Falls down and shoots Tails.] Take that, B*TCH!
Tails: [Falls down and starts crawling.] Help! Pimp down! Pimp in distress! Oh sh*t I got blood in my perm.
Cream: (shakes head) Pathetic… [Walks away.]
Tails: Damn You! (holds sides and sees Alien #1&2) Who the hell are you?
Alien #1&2: (smiles)
Tails: Oh no! 0.o (screams)
[Sonic hears screaming.]
Sonic: (ear twitch) Was that Tails… (hears more screaming)
Tails: Please help! This is Tails asking for help!
Sonic: Nope, definitely not Tails.
Tails: Ugh! This dildo really hurts in my fox's rectum!
Sonic: Yep, that definitely wasn't Tails saying that.
Tails: SONIC, JUST GET YOU'RE ASS OVER HERE AND HELP ME!
Sonic: What the f*ck?! I must be tripping. Now I'm hearing things.
Tails: (screams in pain) GOD D*MMIT, F*CK! YOU GUYS ARE F*CKING A*SHOLES!
Alien #1&2: Let's go. [Leaves.]
Tails: Damn, that fricken hurts.
Ashton Kutcher: Ha! You Have Been Punk'd!
Tails: Wha…?!
At Ashton Kutcher's Studio…
Ashton Kutcher: Man that was a funny prank we did. I got two of our people in our crew to put on these alien suits and anal rape people with dildos like: Sonic the Hedgehog, which screamed like a b*tch, and Tails, the expression on his face was priceless after I told him "He's been punk'd!"
Tails: [Bangs on the door.] OPEN THIS GOD D*MN DOOR, I'M GONNA KILL YOU!
Ashton Kutcher: Go masturbate or something you virgin fox!
Tails: [Breaks down door.] (evil stare)
Ashton Kutcher: Oh sh*t, I gotta go! I'm Ashton Kutcher see ya next time!
