Levi is Mr Motivational today... interesting methods of motivation but effective none the less, enjoy :)
Two week's worth of training and Armin found that he was beginning to get used to it. He had become accustomed to the breathlessness that came after a particularly hard run and the burn in his arms and stomach from holding himself up on them for a few minutes. In fact now he relished that feeling as it meant that he was pushing himself harder and harder each time. He could run for longer and he didn't always feel as if he was going to pass out when he stopped. He had also been managing to hold himself up in that position for longer and sometimes even without Levi having to push his backside back down into a straight line.
He was getting more used to Levi too. He was still terrified of him and there was still every chance that Levi would beat the shit out of him during every single one of their sessions but, so far, the worst Armin had received was a clip round the back of the head while, standing on one leg, he had wobbled when he was supposed to be keeping his balance. He was always surprised to see that Levi actually turned up every morning. Armin had half expected him to tire of it and tell him to go and get fucked.
Armin found that he was actually starting to enjoy spending time with Levi. Yes, he was blunt and crass and often terrifying but there was more about him than the other captains Armin had come across. The only other he knew that was about as mad (if not madder) than Levi was Hange and Hange was certifiably insane. Sometimes, if Armin was lucky, while holding himself in a particular position Levi would tell him about when he used to live in the underground. It was nothing more than mindless chatter to Levi and it wasn't as if Armin had ever asked him about his life but he sometimes liked to talk and it served to distract Armin from his aching muscles for a few seconds.
Levi was fascinating and Armin found himself thinking that he had had it quite easy living in Shinganshina. No wonder Levi was so angry all the time... As well as all that the man was a god-damn hero and Armin looked up to him more and more the more he discovered about him. So much so that he had learnt how to tie a cravat and often found himself, after a secluded shower in the bathroom no one ever used, parting his hair so that he looked a bit like Levi.
The first time he had done it he had immediately washed it out knowing that if Levi ever saw him like that he would beat him to within an inch of his life. Armin had promised him that it wasn't about hero worship and he was determined to stick to that promise. He had managed to avoid another beating and he would like to keep it that way. Unfortunately one evening he hadn't washed it out properly and it was still stuck like that the following morning.
Might as well go for broke, Armin had thought as he tied the cravat around his neck but when he got onto the training ground and saw the murderous look that crossed Levi's face when he saw him he instantly wished that he hadn't.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Levi snarled.
"I... um..." Armin had no explanation. He had already learnt that Levi could be more irritable than usual first thing in the morning and the look in his eyes said that if Armin lived through the next few minutes then he would be very fucking lucky indeed.
"Arlert you had better make the explanation for this phenomenally good," Levi said, his voice dangerous. Whatever he could say was not going to be good enough so Armin took a deep breath and readied himself to sign his own death warrant.
"I don't have one Sir," he said. He could feel himself trembling as he stood there, waiting while Levi studied him. Whatever was going through his head, whatever punishment he had planned it didn't seem to be coming and Armin allowed himself to relax a little. That had been a stupid move on his part because, before he could do anything, Levi grabbed a fist full of his hair and pulled him down, shoving his knee into Armin's stomach. He let go and Armin fell to his knees, clutching his stomach and trying not to make a sound. I deserved that...
Before he could recover Levi planted his boot in the middle of Armin's shoulders and shoved him down, face first, into the floor. Armin just about managed to turn his head at the last second again but he could feel the dirt and gravel cutting into his skin and the pressure on his head making him dizzier as Levi pushed his head further into the ground. Just as he thought he was about to pass out the pressure on his head let up and Levi gave him another kick to the stomach.
"I said what the fuck do you think you're doing?" Levi growled again kicking Armin onto his back and pressing his boot down, hard on his throat. Armin gasped for breath.
"Sir I... I can't breathe," he said as Levi's boot pressed down harder, cutting off his air supply.
"Then use what you've got left to fucking answer me," he snarled.
"I'm sorry Sir," Armin said as best he could. "I wasn't thinking, I was just messing around one night and I thought it looked good and I..." The rest of his sentence was cut off by Levi pressing down again.
"Doing an awful lot of talking for someone who supposedly can't breathe," Levi observed. Armin's vision began at fade and he reached up blindly to grasp ineffectively at Levi's ankle. Levi kicked his hand away and as the pressure of his throat left Armin took in big gulps of air. He coughed, rolling onto his side so that he didn't choke on his own saliva, before pushing himself to his hands and knees rubbing his throat.
Before he could recover he fell Levi's boot connect with his stomach, sending him sprawling back to the floor. He curled in on himself holding his stomach and hoping that this was going to be the last of it.
"So tell me again what did you think you were doing?"
"Being an idiot," Armin replied, his voice gravelly and his throat sore.
"Will I catch you doing it again?"
"No Sir," Armin said. The pain in his stomach subsided and he just about managed to push himself up so that he was sitting at Levi's feet. He reached up and pulled the cravat off. "I'm sorry Sir, I just..."
"Just what?" Levi asked when Armin offered no end to his sentence.
"I just didn't want to look like myself for a little while," Armin finished. His cheeks were burning and he hung his head in shame, not wanting to meet Levi's gaze. He closed his eyes expecting to feel another blow but it never came. Instead he felt Levi's hand on his head, gently ruffling his hair back into its normal state. He looked up at him with wide eyes. It was the first time Levi had touched him without hitting him or forcefully manoeuvring him into a position to hold; it was strange but comforting.
The moment passed and Levi flicked Armin hard in the centre of the forehead. He bit down on a yelp of pain, but it still sounded in the back of his throat, and he reached up to rub his sore forehead.
"Be your own fucking person," Levi told him. "If you're only doing this because of some fucked up hero worship then I will kill you myself right now. I don't need another kid following me around looking like he's in love and getting in the way, it's too much of a burden."
"It's not Sir," Armin said, "I promise. I'll get stronger and I'll become a better soldier. I'm not going to be anyone's burden."
"Then get up and prove it."
With great difficulty (although not as much as the last time Levi had beaten him to a pulp) Armin shakily pushed himself to his feet. He still felt rather woozy from having had someone stamp on his throat for too long but the pain was starting to lessen and he could breathe properly again. Once he was standing he straightened himself up and saluted. He could feel his entire body trembling slightly but he stood his ground. At least I'm not bleeding this time...
"Are you ready to continue training?" Levi asked.
"Yes I am Sir," Armin replied, determined.
"Good," Levi said. "Follow me."
He lead Armin over to a wooden frame, very much like the ones they used for practising how to use the ODM Gear, fixed into the ground. Unlike some of the others this frame consisted of only the two posts in the ground and a third connecting the two of them. There was a wooden stool in the centre of the two posts, which Levi went to stand on. He grabbed hold of the connecting post and pulled himself up using just his arms until he was able to swing his leg over so that he was sitting on the frame. He made that look so easy!
"Stand on this," he ordered nodding at the stool. Armin dutifully obeyed and went to stand on the stool. Being slightly taller he found himself at eye level with the post Levi was sitting on. "Hands up in front of you, palms facing towards you" Levi ordered.
Armin did as he was told and watched as Levi pulled two pairs of shackles out of one of his pockets. He secured one each around Armin's wrists and secured the other end to the post. Once he was done and he seemed happy that Armin was staying put he swung his leg back over the post and dropped himself gracefully to the floor.
"What am I supposed to be doing Sir?" Armin asked. He didn't see how being handcuffed to a post was going to help him get stronger in the slightest.
"I'd want to hold on to that post if I were you," was Levi's reply.
"Pardon?" Armin asked. With no other warning Levi kicked the stool out from under Armin's feet and he dropped, crying out in surprise and clinging to the post for dear life.
"Now you're going to want to keep hold of that post if you don't want to fall and break either of your wrists," Levi said. "Once you can pull yourself up, like I just did, ten times then I'll let you down."
"I don't know how to," Armin cried, panic bubbling up inside him. If he lost his grip then he would fall and falling with the shackles around his wrists would most likely cause damage, if not permanent damage.
"It's very simple," Levi said calmly. "Just use the muscles in your arms to pull yourself up, nothing more to it than that."
Armin closed his eyes, he could feel his grip on the post starting to slip. His breath was beginning to come in faster and shallower and he couldn't pull enough air into his lungs to try and stay calm. His legs were flailing, trying to find some kind of purchase for his feet but there was none. He had two ways out of this; complete Levi's impossible task of using his muscles to pull himself up or fall and let his wrists break and be out of commission perhaps forever if the damage was bad enough. He couldn't go back now... not when he was so close to actually being able to do something.
"Arlert," Levi's voice cut through the panic in his head and he opened his eyes to see him staring up at him levelly, "you can do this, just take it slowly and once you've done one you can do it again."
"Yes Sir," Armin said. He tighten his grip on the post and, pushing every ounce of strength he had into his upper arms, slowly began to pull himself up until the middle of his chest was level with the post.
"Good," Levi said from bellow him. "Now lower yourself back down slowly and then do it again. That's one."
Using his grip on the post Armin began to slowly lower himself back to the position he had been in at the start before he began to pull himself up again. He concentrated on breathing through the pain in his arms as he continued to raise and lower himself, Levi shouting encouragement up to him. The more he did the easier and harder it became. Knowing how to pull himself up made it easier to actually do it but with each one the muscles in his arms began to grow more and more tired and it took longer. He was gripping the post so tight that his knuckles turned white and he was sure that he wasn't going to be able to prize them off once he was done. He had tried to keep counting so he would know how long the torture was going to continue for but concentrating on breathing and staying conscious had taken priority.
"Ten," Levi said finally and Armin could have cried with happiness. He could feel his arms shaking, sweat was pouring down his face and his hair and clothes were sticking to him. "Here." Levi placed the stool underneath him and Armin stepped onto it, relief flooding him as he was able to relieve the pressure from his arms.
Levi jumped from the ground to grab onto the post and pull himself up so that he could swing his leg over the post to sit on it. Armin felt a stab of jealousy – Levi really did make it look so easy but, then again, he had been doing it for years so of course he made it look easy, it was easy for him. He unlocked the shackles and Armin let his arms drop, hugging them to his chest as blood began to rush into them making them ache even more.
"You did well for a first time," Levi said from where he still sat perched on the post.
"The desire to not have my wrists broken was good motivation," Armin chuckled softly but regretted it instantly as a fresh pain shot through him. The rest of the day was not going to be pleasant if that kept happening.
"Do one more and pull yourself up so you're sitting up here," Levi said. "I'll help you," he added as Armin's face fell.
Armin took a deep breath and reached up to grab the post again, ignoring the agony coursing through his arms. He took another deep breath and began to pull himself up so that his chest was level with the post and continued to push, fighting through the pain until his arms were straight. Levi grabbed the back of his jacket and helped Armin to heave himself up and swing his leg over the post so that he was sitting opposite him.
"Now if you're ever hanging from the side of a building and your ODM Gear stops working you can pull yourself up and back onto the roof," Levi said. So there was a point to that torture, Armin thought. "Next I want you to hold onto the post and swing your left leg round so that your knees are together."
Armin took a deep breath, terrified that he was going to fall backwards and break something, and grabbed hold of the post. He closed his eyes, not daring to look as he swung his left leg over the post to meet his right. He slowly opened his eyes. He could feel himself trembling and he didn't know whether that was through fatigue or the fact that the muscles in his arms were still aching but he tightened his legs around the post, pulling them upwards to try and hold himself upright.
"What do I do now Sir?" he asked.
"Now you lean back over the post and you use your core muscles to pull yourself up and in and you do that ten times as well," Levi replied.
"But..."
"Don't worry; I'm here, I'm not going to let you fall," Levi said. He placed both of his hands on Armin's knees. The angle was slightly awkward but Armin felt better having his hands there than not. "Link your fingers and place them behind your head and slowly lower yourself down so that you're hanging off the post.
Armin held his breath as he began to slowly lower himself backwards so that he was hanging upside down from the post. He could feel all the blood rushing to his head and it made him feel sick. The sooner he could get this one over with the better.
"What do I do now Sir?"
"Pull yourself up into a sitting position," Levi replied. "Think of it as doing sit-ups but in mid-air and hanging upside down."
"I feel kind of dizzy," Armin said.
"Faster you do them the faster you can get up," Levi stated.
Armin grit his teeth and slowly began to heave himself up to what would be a sitting position if he had been on level ground, before lowering himself back down. This exercise felt as if it was much easier than the last, the part that was the most unpleasant was having all the blood rushing to his head every time he lowered himself back down. It still hurt like hell but the pain wasn't the worst part about it, it was just about manageable.
Once he had done about five he felt the hands on his knees disappear and the next time he pulled himself up he saw that Levi was no longer holding him in place. He tightened his legs to keep himself from falling but he didn't feel as terrified that he was going to fall. It might have been because the position was better, it might have been because Levi was still sitting next to him, it might have been any number of thing but, for whatever reason, Armin felt more secure as he continued to work his muscles.
Finally he had done ten and when he pulled himself up one last time he felt Levi grab the front of his jacket with one hand and place the other on his back and help him pull himself up so that he was sitting on the post again. His gripped the post hard, letting his head fall forward as dizziness caught up with him. Levi's hand never left his back and Armin was very grateful as he was almost certain that he would fall back if he had to keep himself up.
"Now if you're stuck hanging upside down you can pull yourself up so that you can free yourself," Levi said. Armin just nodded, not trusting himself to speak. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah," he said finally. "Just feeling a bit light headed and dizzy."
"We'll get you back on the ground and you might feel a lit better," Levi said. "You remember how you got up here?"
"Yes Sir."
"Good, do that but in reverse."
That instruction could have been much more helpful but Armin nodded and did as he was told. Slowly, so that the world didn't start to spin and make him lose his balance Armin swung first one leg, then the other over the post so that he was supporting himself on his arms again. His muscles began to protest the instant all of his body weight was put on them but he managed to lower himself with control rather than just letting himself drop. From beside him Levi did the same, letting himself drop to the floor once he was down.
Armin found purchase on the stool before letting go of the post and returning to ground level. His head span and he fell back onto the stool, hanging his head between his knees and breathing heavily to stop the rolling in his stomach. He felt a hand on his back rubbing soothing circles in between his shoulder blades. Once his neck felt like it would support his head again he looked up into Levi's face.
"You alright?" Levi asked.
"Yes Sir," Armin nodded. His head was no longer spinning and he had stopped feeling the urge to be sick.
"Can you stand?" Levi asked.
"I think so," Armin replied. Legs shaking like a baby deer he managed to push himself to his feet to stand in front of Levi. He was a little wobbly but he was standing and that felt like a huge achievement in and of itself.
"And now we'll go for a run," Levi stated.
"You can't be serious," Armin said, his eyes wide with horror at the prospect of having to run after all of that. Levi fixed him with an unimpressed raised eyebrow.
"Do I look like I'm fucking joking?" he asked.
"No Sir."
"Good, 'cause I'm not," Levi said. "Now try to keep up."
He set off at a run and there was nothing Armin could do but follow. His legs ached slightly from the previous exercise and he was already lagging behind before they had really even begun. He grit his teeth and pushed himself forward. One day, he thought, one day he was going to keep pace with Levi and maybe even out run him. It didn't help his self confidence that Levi had a lot more experience than he did, both out in the field and in training, but he had to keep reminding himself that. Of course Levi was going to make it look easy – it was easy for him.
By the end of the run Armin's legs ached and his lungs burned. His clothes were sticking to him and he felt dizzy. Almost as soon as they had stopped his legs gave out and he fell to the floor, catching himself on his hands and knees.
"Aww was it too much for you?" Levi asked mockingly.
"No Sir," Armin panted in return.
"Then get on your feet," came the harsh command. Armin tried to push himself up but his limbs weren't cooperating. His whole body was shaking and he was certain that he was stuck where he was for the foreseeable future.
"I can't..." he said weakly. Levi snorted derisively.
"'Can't' won't help you to make this difference you're so desperate for," he said. "'Can't' won't stop a Titan from making you their next meal, in fact, 'can't' will get you killed."
"Sir..."
"If you win you live, if you lose you die," Levi stated. "How do you expect to win if you don't fight. Now prove that this is what you really want and get on your feet."
Armin took a deep breath, bracing himself against the floor and gritting his teeth in preparation for the next onslaught of pain. He placed both his palms on the floor and pushed, forcing weight onto his aching legs. It took a lot of effort – much more than it should have done – but Armin managed to push himself to his feet. Once he was standing he clenched his fist and shoved it to his chest in a salute, determination shinning fiercely in his bright blue eyes. He could feel himself trembling with the effort but it didn't matter: he was standing. A rare smile graced Levi's lips.
"Well done Arlert," he said. "We'll make a solider out of you yet, kid."
"Thank you Sir," Armin said feeling a swell of pride in his chest. He couldn't stop the smile that threatened to rip his face apart but he didn't care. Receiving praise like that from Levi was the equivalent of winning a gold medal. It had taken a long time for him to get it and it might be the last time he ever got it so he was going to savour it.
"Now go get cleaned up," Levi ordered. "I'll see you at breakfast."
"Yes Sir."
Levi turned and left the training ground. Armin watched him go, holding his stance the entire time just in case he turned around. He didn't know how much longer he could hold himself up for but if there was one thing that he did not want was for Levi to see him collapse again. He doubted that he would come back just to beat him to his feet again but whatever little respect he had managed to gain would instantly be lost. Finally Levi turned and disappeared from sight.
As soon as he was gone Armin let his legs finally give out and sank to the floor again. This time he didn't even try to move, he just sat there and waited for his muscles to stop clenching. He knew he should push himself to his feet to stretch them out but he couldn't quite bring himself to move. He lay back against the hard, cold ground. In a minute, he thought to himself, I'll get up and carry on in a minute but almost before he could finish that thought he heard Levi's irritated voice in his head.
Get up and finish, you lazy useless shit-heel.
Armin heaved himself back into a sitting position and then forced himself to his feet again. If he was going to do this then he was going to do it properly and he couldn't... wouldn't miss a day of training because he had put himself out of commission simply because he was allowing himself to be lazy. If he was going to do that then he might as well give up now and that sure as hell wasn't an option.
