Nick was still calling Liv's name when he jumped into the back of the ambulance that was rushing Kara to Mercy Hospital. The EMTs were working feverishly trying to stop the hemorrhage from her left arm and right side. She was unconscious and was bleeding out right before Nick's eyes. Olivia still hadn't responded to him as he continued calling her name. Just as he was about to hang up to call back again, he heard a male voice answer him.

"Hey she's alright, she just sort of fainted. She's in a daze right now but she's fine. Which hospital are you heading to?"

Nick looked at the phone confused, wondering who in the hell was he talking to. "What do you mean sort of fainted? Is she ok? Who the hell is this?"

"This is Elliot. Liv is fine; she's just trying to wrap her head around what's going on. What hospital are you at so that I can make sure that she gets there safely?

What the hell is she doing with him? Now is not the time, focus on Kara. "We're heading to Mercy Hospital now. Where is Noah?"

"He's here with us. He's also fine, I just texted Lucy to come and watch him while we're at the hospital. I've got everything under control. As soon as Lucy gets here we will be on our way to Mercy," assured Elliot.

Nick didn't particularly like the guy but he was happy that he knew what to do in the middle of a crisis. He's still an asshole. "Ok thanks. How is Liv? Is she still out of it?"

"She's ok. I think she's back, wait a minute," said Elliot to Nick. He put the phone down on the floor as he started to stroke Olivia's hair out of her face. He kept soothing her as he started talking to her. "Liv, hey you're alright. I need you to nod if you can hear me," she nodded. "Ok good, I know that you're still in shock but I need you to hold it together for me, alright?" she nodded again. "Come on stand up with me honey, stand up," commanded Elliot in a mild tone. Once Olivia was on her feet, she looked at Elliot as tears clouded her eyes. She reached out and grabbed him as she sobbed into his chest. "Shhhh, it's alright Liv. You told me yourself that she's a fighter. It's ok sweetheart, it's ok." Nick heard the entire exchange over the phone. He knew that he shouldn't get upset but he didn't like the fact that Elliot was the one consoling her one bit.

Nick was sick and tired of listening to Elliot doing his job over the phone so he started yelling Liv's name so that they would know that he was still on the line. "Liv! Hey Liv, talk to me. You alright?"

Olivia let Elliot go and searched for Nick's voice. She picked her phone up off the ground and said her first words since receiving the news that Kara had been shot. She wiped her face and tried to compose herself before she spoke. "Nick, how is she? How's Kara?" her voice barely above a whisper.

"She's fighting hard Liv. I rode in the ambulance with her and she was unconscious but she was still fighting. The EMTs managed to stop the bleeding in her arm but they were having a hard time controlling the bleeding of her side. They rushed her into surgery as soon as we made it to the hospital."

Olivia listened closely as Nick updated her on Kara's condition. Knowing that she was the reason why the young detective was fighting for her life broke something deep down inside of Olivia's heart. "It's my fault you know…" she said it so lowly that Nick didn't hear her.

"You say something Liv?"

"It's my fault why she's in surgery bleeding out right now. I got her shot, Nick. It's entirely my fault."

Nick was so confused as to why Olivia would be blaming herself for Kara's shooting. "That guy was a low life; it's not your fault. He was an animal; he has two bodies under his belt that we know of."

Three including Kara and I'm the one to blame. "I know he's an animal. I'm the reason why he's back on the streets…" Liv was about to finish the rest of the story when Lucy and two officers knocked on the door. "I've got to go Nick, Lucy just got here I will see you soon."

She was gone before Nick could respond to anything that she had just said. He had many questions but they would have to wait. Now was the time to rally around Kara, praying that she pulled through. Olivia explained to Lucy what was going on and made sure that the officers stayed with the two of them until they were sure that the threat was completely over and no other perps were involved in Scott Evans' plan. With one last kiss for Noah, Olivia was out the door with Elliot hot on her heels. He drove silently, waiting for her to speak first. When she didn't he decided to break the ice.

"So does the perp that you beat the other day have anything to do with why you're taking this so personally?" asked Elliot, reading the situation perfectly.

Amazed at how well Elliot read her, she nodded before speaking. "Yes. Kara was doing the interrogation with me, when I snapped. He threatened me and everyone around me because I embarrassed him by kicking his ass. He couldn't get to me so he attacked her. I'm the reason why she's clinging onto life right now. If I didn't lose my temper she would be just fine but no…I provoked him and now Kara might die. She's just a rookie El; a sweet, smart, young, detective with her whole life ahead of her. She loves country music of all things, ya know? She said 'a sistah can like country.' I can't even—"

"You can't blame yourself. Yeah you attacked him, yeah you lost your temper but you didn't pull that trigger, he did. It's not on you, Liv. So stop blaming yourself and get it together before you head into that hospital. She needs your strength right now, not all of this doubt and blame."

They pulled up right outside of the emergency wing of Mercy. Olivia cleaned her face and gave herself a once over in the mirror before taking Elliot's hand. "Thanks El, you're right. You always know just what to say well…except for when you don't," smiled Olivia for the first time that night. "Honestly El, thank you for everything that you've done for me today. You're the best, I mean that."

Accept it Elliot, friend zone. "I know," smiled Elliot as he released her hand. "Well I got you here safe and sound. Go on in and be strong for your friend."

Olivia thought that Elliot was coming in with her but she understood why he decided against it. She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, "I will be thanks again." And with that, Elliot drove off into the night as Liv prepared to go in to be with her squad.

The emergency wing of Mercy Hospital was filled with a sea of blue. The NYPD had packed out the small waiting room, waiting impatiently to hear some good news about their wounded sister in blue. Olivia frantically scanned the room looking for Nick or any other members of her squad. The first person that she spotted was Carisi in the corner to himself with his head in his hands. Liv fought through the crowd to reach him as she put a hand on his shoulder.

"Carisi has there been an update?"

Carisi shot up, smoothing his uncharacteristic unruly hair back before he answered his Sergeant. "Nothing Sarge, they haven't told us a goddamn thing!" People started to look at the duo as Liv tried to calm him down.

"Ok Carisi, it's ok. Where is everyone else?" asked Liv.

"I don't know. I just came back from outside after some nurse refused to get a doctor to give us an update. I needed some air."

Olivia was no fool, she saw that there was more than him being upset about just a co-worker but now was definitely not the time or place for that conversation. "Ok come on, let's find the others."

The two of them weeded their way through the masses looking for their squad. Finally Liv laid eyes on the only other person that she wanted to see more than Kara right now. His eyes met hers and they naturally gravitated towards each other. Without thinking they both threw their arms around each other and stayed that way for what seemed like an eternity. This was home, Olivia knew it and Nick knew it. In the midst of chaos and confusion, they settled each other simply by being themselves. When they finally ended their embrace, they looked into each other's eyes for the first time since they both knew that this was it for them. A doctor finally coming out with an update is what snapped them out of their temporary euphoria. As soon as everyone saw the doctor, people started speaking all at once before he silenced them all with a whistle.

"Detective Kara Snow is still in surgery; she's lost a lot of blood and required a transfusion. The bullet in her left arm was through and through. The bullet that pierced her side caused a tear in one of her kidneys and hit a few other arteries. We're trying to stop all of the bleeding now. If the kidney is too damaged we will just remove it. The blood loss is our main concern because she can stroke out. It's too soon to tell if she's out of the woods now because of the blood loss but we're doing everything that we can for her. Has her next of kin been notified?" asked Doctor Henderson.

"Her parents have been notified and are on the next plane to New York coming from Memphis," answered Lt. Murphy.

"Good that's all for now and we will keep you updated." The doctor turned to leave before turning back around to inform the officers about another patient. "Oh before I go, Scott Evans died thirty minutes ago in surgery. That's all."

"Nobody's going to shed a tear over that sorry son of a bitch," said Fin. His fellow detectives nodded in agreement. The detectives settled in to stay, waiting on the fate of the rookie detective. Everyone was shaken up by one of their own being shot but Nick noticed how personal that Liv was taking it. Before saying a word to her, he grabbed her hand and escorted her outside so that they could talk.

"Hey how you holding up?" asked Nick.

Olivia shrugged not wanting to get into what all of what she was feeling on the inside. She was afraid that if she told him that she would break down and not be able to pull herself back together for Kara and the rest of her squad. Even though Murphy was still acting CO, Liv felt that they were still her squad and they deserved the best from her at all times.

"I know this is personal for you Liv. First of all, I know that you're very fond of Kara and the second thing I can't quite put my finger on it. But it's something though, I can feel it," explained Nick.

Olivia sighed deeply before she spoke. "The other day at work, Kara and I interviewed Scott Evans for raping Lisa Tyler." Nick's interest peaked, given that Evans was heavily tied into his case as well. Liv continued, "He confessed to raping her by saying that you can't rape a prostitute. Before the interview finished, he got all in my face threatening me and I lost it on him. Kara had to pull me off of him as he continued threatening me and my family." Nick's fists involuntarily clenched. "I got sent home and wrote up for assaulting Evans. When I got back the next day I found out that they threw out my confession claiming coercion, they let him go Nick." Olivia didn't have to explain the rest; Nick knew exactly where this was going.

"I can't imagine how you must feel but you've got to know that this isn't your fault babe. This guy should have been locked up a long time before he even raped Lisa Tyler. Evans and his partner Patrick Moore have five bodies under their names, two of them belonging to Evans. He should have been locked up babe, it's not on you. Don't blame yourself; it's not your fault."

Olivia absorbed all of the information that Nick had just relayed to her. Logically she understood it but it still didn't assuage her own guilt. "Whoa, that's a lot to take in but I understand. And before you ask, the only reason why I didn't tell you was because you were knee deep in your own hot case. You told me that you needed to focus and I didn't want to distract you so I took care of it myself with Elliot's help…" She slipped the last part in there hoping that he was still reeling from a previous confession.

Nick took a deep breath like he had learned to do so in anger management. He did this several times, feeling his body calm down with each deep breath. He closed the distance between himself and Olivia as he took her face in his hands as he spoke. "For future references, when someone threatens my family please distract me. Two, I know that Elliot is your best friend or whatever but I'm your man. You come to me first when you have a problem and then we can figure it out together. Lastly, I'm going to need you to know the difference between an emergency and the need for us to talk about something that we both already know is inevitable. If I would have known any of this I would have given my case off to Bernard or somebody else. You're more important to me than a big case, Olivia." He released a deep breath before continuing, "I want you to understand how hard that was for me to say without yelling, progress." She smiled at his obvious unnatural self-control; she could tell that he was pissed. He brushed her lips lightly before he added, "I can't promise you this same reaction if this happens again."

Olivia couldn't hold in her laughter any longer. She grabbed the back of his neck bringing his lips to hers as she planted a deep kiss on him. He welcomed the kiss as his hands tightened around her waist. She broke the kiss, as she continued to run her fingers through his hair. "I love you, Nick."

"I love you too Olivia, so much." He kissed her again with all of the passion that he felt in his heart for the sexy brunette in his arms. All of the drama, lonely nights and longing were worth it if the end result was having this woman in his arms professing her love for him. Their moment of bliss was cut short by a voice coming from the entrance door of the hospital.

"Oh uhm, sorry to interrupt but Doctor Henderson is back with an update," drawled Amanda.

Olivia sighed heavily and grabbed Nick's hand before responding, "We're right behind you." Olivia prayed for the best while knowing that if the worst happened, she didn't have to go through it alone.

Five months later…

Olivia was now back in charge of the 16th precinct, Special Victims Unit, as Lieutenant Olivia Benson. Her squad had just gotten back into the swing of things. The unit had been through a storm and they were now finally out on the other side of it stronger than ever. Olivia had a surprising new number two, that she worked well with in Sergeant Odafin Tutuola. He had initially refused but Liv persuaded him into being her second in command. Although Olivia liked to believe that she was the one responsible for him taking the job; Fin came to the conclusion that he was getting 'too old for this shit' and figured that he would enjoy dishing out orders from time to time.

Rollins and Carisi were still holding it down for the 1-6. Rollins didn't give Carisi such a hard time anymore given all that they had been through. He was like a little brother to her and she now enjoyed showing him the ropes. Olivia looked at her squad from the comfort of her office admiring how they all had grown. Her eyes traveled to the desk that used to be occupied by Detective Kara-Lynn Snow as a sad smile stretched across her face. The shooting of Kara changed a lot of things at the 1-6. It brought the squad closer as they said goodbye to the rookie from Memphis, Tennessee. She decided to head back home after the shooting to be closer to her family. Even though she was only with the unit for a short period of time, the detective definitely left her mark in all of their hearts, especially Lieutenant Benson's.

Olivia arrived home around seven thirty that night after a rather smooth day at the office. She walked in to the smell of home cooking and the laughter of her two favorite guys. Her face lit up when she saw Nick and Noah's faces covered in spaghetti sauce. Not only had her squad grown stronger in the last five months but so had her relationship. She and Nick were now living together in Olivia's apartment until they found a house of their own. They were in love and committed to each other and they couldn't be happier. The future was on the horizon and she couldn't wait to take the journey with Nick by her side.

"How are my two favorite guys?" asked Olivia with that signature thousand watt mega smile on her face.

"Now that you're home, we're great. Right buddy?" asked Nick to a giggling Noah. "You should take that as a yes," joked Nick. "How was your day babe?"

"Good but so much better now, I missed you today," said Liv as she kissed Nick tasting the sauce that still covered his face. "You taste good," she kissed him again. "And I missed you too big boy," she took Noah from Nick's hands as she peppered his face with kisses sending the adorable little boy into a frenzy.

Olivia never thought that she would have a family life. Never in a million years would she think that she would feel so content being so domesticated but she was. She still loved her job but nothing compared to the happiness that she felt when she came home from work to the two best guys in the world. After dinner they put Noah to bed early so that they could have some celebration time, celebrating nothing in particular, just happy to be in love. After a very physical round of love making the two lovers lie in each other's arms reflecting and lounging in their afterglow.

Nick pressed his lips to Olivia's temple before he whispered, "Wow…that was wow. That was amazing, you're amazing and I consider myself a very lucky guy to have you. I love you, baby. "

"I'm sure you do consider yourself very lucky, most guys would after what I just did to you," teased Olivia which earned her a playful swat on the ass. "Oh, I'm just joking babe. I love you too."

"You better because you're never going to get rid of me. I want this forever, Liv. I'm ready for the next step whenever you are," said Nick as his serious gaze found her gorgeous eyes dancing with delight.

"Wow, you know Nick, I never thought that all of this would come as a result from that one night that I decided to take a chance and put myself out there. It has been rocky at times, with some ups and downs but I am so glad that I did and I'm so happy that you're mine. I remember you telling me that you were leaving and that night I started to wonder what if you stayed…never did I expect to have the life that I always wanted from the man conceived only in my dreams. I'm so glad that you stayed my love."

No other words were uttered. The physical expression of love taking over as the future promised endless possibilities of blissfulness together.

THE END

Thanks for reading. A sequel might be in the future but I got a very interesting request for a story that terrifies me. It's out of my comfort zone and it is also centered on a ship that I don't even know if I ship lol. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed 'What If You Stayed?' because I enjoyed writing it.