"Aaron." Amy smiled brightly as she bounced down the steps of her school, goosebumps raising on her legs as the brisk March air hit her bare legs. Sometimes she wished that she hadn't gone to a catholic school – or any school that required uniform. She was already dreaming of spending the weekend lounging in her worn jeans and baggy sweatshirt.
She was surprised to see Aaron standing outside her school. He had been away for work the last few weeks; she figured the last thing he would want was anything taking away from time with his wife. He smiled back at her but she could tell it was forced. Over the last two years, she had grown quite adept at reading his emotions, especially the ones that he tried to hide. The bad ones. "I haven't seen you in a while. I wanted to see how you are. I was in the area with Haley and she's getting her hair done so I figured I'd walk you home while I wait."
She stopped at the step that brought her eye level to him. "What is it?"
"Let's walk a bit." He grabbed her book bag and began walking. She noticed he didn't even try to deflate her worries.
After walking for a minute, Amy couldn't handle the silence. "How was London?" she asked.
"It was nice. I think you'd really like it. There were theatres that I think you'd like. The Globe. Cute bookshops. Of course, I didn't see any of them."
"You went to the theatre capital of the world and you didn't see anything?"
"I did buy you a present though." He reached into the plastic bag he was carrying and pulled out a wrapped gift. He handed it to her but she waited until they had reached the nearest bench to open it. She neatly unwrapped the paper and pulled out a complete works of Shakespeare.
"Oh, wow. Aaron, this is great, thank you." She wrapped her arm around his neck and gave him a hug. "Seriously, though, you could have seen a play at the Globe."
He made a reach for the book. "Well, then I guess I can just take this -"
She pulled it out of his reach. "I'm sorry. You were completely right to not see a play." They walked a little further in silence. Amy held the book close to her, acting as a security blanket for the storm she knew that was about to come. "How's Haley?"
"She's good. She missed me of course."
"How could she not?"
Hotch laughed. "But, of course, work is work so when I got back last night, I couldn't go straight home. She wasn't too thrilled about that."
"You must be really jet-lagged."
"Yeah, a little."
She stopped walking. "Are we going to talk about it?"
"It's jet lag. It's hardly interesting." He smiled at her. "It's not bad. The group that abducted you – three of them got life. The youngest got a shorter sentence and of course the lawyer is trying to appeal but I don't think it's going to make a difference."
"And the man who bought me?"
"There's still nothing. But I haven't stopped. I'm still looking for him." Hotch looked over at Amy: her arms were crossed but her nails were digging into them. She had gone a few shades paler than she walready was. He took off his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders. "Here. You look cold." The jacket fell to just above the knee and covered her hands, so he had to roll up the sleeves. Amy just stared dead ahead.
"Tell me."
He stopped walking to face her. "Amy, this isn't a good idea."
"Aaron."
He started walking again. "I got the call at 12.30 that a young girl was taken from her front yard. I went to the address with Gideon. Your grandmother was in the kitchen. Your mother was upstairs..." Amy listened as Hotch recalled the events that had led to him finding her. She still found it hard to believe that there was a time when he cared about her and she didn't know he existed; she had almost forgotten that a life existed outside of the world she was in. She listened as he told her about how he had found her, hoping that something he said would jog her memory, something to tell her who had hurt her.
But nothing came to her as their story so far came to a close.
By the time the story ended, they were perched on the wall outside of her grandmother's house. "This is so frustrating. I almost wish that he'd take another girl just so there'd be something. I know that sounds awful." She knew he was looking at her with pity on his face. "Or Crystal?"
He shook his head. "That's not necessarily a bad thing. She could still be alive."
"Can I have a look at the case file?"
"Amy, no."
"Please. Maybe I'll remember something-"
"Amelia. I need you promise me something: I need you to leave this to me. I promise you, I will catch this guy but I need you to promise me that you will live your life as normally as you possibly can."
"I don't know how to live anymore. Everything feels so fucked up."
They sat there for a while, quiet, letting the words hang in the air. Finally, Hotch broke the silence. "I feel like I should reprimand you for that."
"It's like I'm not me. I'm someone completely different and I'm trying to come to terms with that and find the man who changed me. None of this is fair."
"We can make this normal. You're not alone."
She smiled weakly at him. "It feels like you're all I have."
"Well, I'm always here."
"I should go." She looked up at the house.
"Why don't Haley and I take you to dinner next weekend? I can tell you all about London." Amy's smile came back to her.
"Ok."
Amy made her way up the drive to her house. She was was barely throught her front door when she heard her grandmother calling her name. She frowned. She was only ever called 'Amelia' when she was in trouble. She checked her watch. School had ended almost an hour ago: she and Hotch had taken longer walking home than she expected. She dropped her bag by the staircase as she walked toward the kitchen, pushed open the door and...
"JJ!" Her blonde haired, blue eyed friend beamed at her as she looked up from her cookies and milk. Lydia was standing by the fridge, arms crossed and her grandmother was sitting across from JJ at the island. "What are you doing here?"
Lydia pulled herself away from the fridge and moved over to the counter. "So you didn't know your friend here was coming?"
JJ stared at Amy, silently trying to convey a message but gave up. "Remember? I'm looking at Georgetown next week and you said I could stay. The last time I called."
Amy shook her head. "Yes. I did. I meant to say it to you, Gran, but I spaced. That's ok, isn't it?" She walked over and robbed a cookie from JJ's plate, popping it in her mouth before wrapping her arms around JJ.
"Oh, darling, I wish she could but I just don't know where she could stay."
"Lydia's room?" Amy suggested.
"No. I'm here all next week."
"Oh joy. You have a room near college."
"I can't get any work done there. My neighbour is... rowdy. So I'm staying here."
Amy felt her temper rising. She grabbed JJ's hand and pulled her up. "Then she can bunk with me." She led JJ up to her room and collapsed and the bed. JJ flopped onto her stomach next to her.
"I'm sorry if I got you into trouble," JJ offered. "And I'm sorry I lied."
"You didn't get me into trouble. I can handle Lyd. But you ran away?"
"My parents are fighting. I just can't handle it. I needed a break. When they're not fighting they're talking about Roz. And I love Roz and I miss her but I just... needed a break from it all."
"Did you at least tell your parents you were coming here?"
She shook her head. "I left a note and jumped on a bus. They knew about Georgestown next week but Mom was supposed to be bringing me. I knew that us alone for a prolonged period of time would mean talking about Roz and I don't want to talk about it."
"JJ. It's ok. Call your parents. You can stay here. Whatever my sister says. I'm so glad you're here."
"What's going on with you?"
"Nothing great."
"What's that?" JJ pointed at the half wrapped book next to Georgia.
"Oh, a present. A friend of mine spent a few weeks in London."
"We should go to London. Like right now."
"Oh, yeah, let's do it. With my non-existant passport." There was a knock on the door. "Come in."
Lydia walked in. "I need to talk to you."
She stood by the open door. "Ok, then," JJ said, pulling herself off the bed, "I will go take a shower." She grabbed her rucksack.
"Down the hall on the left." Lydia closed the bedroom door after JJ and walked further into the room, sinking into Amy's armchair, lifting her feet onto the footrest. "No, please. Make yourself comfortable."
"I don't think you should see him anymore."
"What are you talking about?"
"Aaron Hotchner. I don't think it's safe spending so much time with him."
"And why not?"
"Amy, you don't know him. You don't know what he could do."
"I'm not listening to this."
"Yes, you are. He's not safe. He could be a killer or something."
"Lyd, Aaron is one of my two best friends. He teaches me things. He teaches me how to defend myself. He's the safest person I could be around. I honestly don't know where this is coming from. Wha- are you jealous or something?"
"No, I'm not jealous."
"Do you want to be with him?"
"NO. Amy, even if he is safe, he's married. It's not right. It's not good."
"Lydia, I am not going to stop spending time with him. If you knew what he's done for me..."
Suddenly the door opened. Gran walked in, a stern look on her face. "What is going on in here?"
"Lydia's being a spiteful bitch." Amy folded her arms across her chest, digging her nails into her arms.
"Amy!"
"She can't stand the idea that I have something that is solely mine that makes me happy. Like JJ. She couldn't wait to stick her opinion in there, could she?"
"I'm looking out for you, Amy. There is so much wrong with your relationship with Hotchner."
"There isn't," Amy pleaded.
JJ and Sophie were standing at the door.. Grammy looked from one girl to the other.
"Perhaps, it would be a good idea to not see him quite so much."
Amy shook her head in disbelief. "You can't be doing this to me..." She could feel her chest tightening. "I ger her trying to but you. - of all people – know what he means to me. What he's done. Grammy, please!"
"I'm not saying to stop seeing him altogether but perhaps a couple of times a month instead of every once or twice a week. After all, he is quite a busy man."
As her chest tightened, Amy felt the bile rising to her throat. She barged through the people standing between her and the exit and stormed out of the room.
JJ stared in disbelief at the scene. Then, angry, she turned on Lydia. "What is the matter with you? Can't you see this guy is clearly important to her?"
"That's the point. We hardly know this man. She should be staying away from him."
JJ shook her head. "Where would she go?"
"What?"
"Amy, your sister: where would she have gone?"
"The pool. She likes the water. It calms her."
The three Marlowe women turned for the door. JJ blocked the exit. "You -" She pointed at Lydia. "- want to take away her best friend. And you -" She turned to Grammy. " - are letting her. I'll bring her around.
JJ walked out to the pool. She couldn't see Amy anywhere. She spotted her clothes by the edge of the pool. JJ walked over and peered in. Amy was sitting at the bottom of the pool. JJ stripped down to her underwear and lowered herself into the cool water – the hairs on the back of her neck and on her arm stood as the liquid made contact with her. She sank to the bottom and tapped Amy on the arm. Amy looked at her and, together, they rose to the surface.
Amy gasped for air. JJ looked at her – she had clearly been crying. "Are you ok?"
"It's like in Cinderella. She is like an evil stepsister who doesn't want me to have anything. She blames me for Mom and dad leaving and I can't tell her the truth."
"Why can't you?"
"Because god forbid Gran let anything taint those precious ears."
"What is the truth?"
Amy shook her head. "I can't... I'm ashamed. Aaron says I have nothing to be ashamed of but I AM the reason my mother left. I AM the reason shit around here was awful for a year." She let the tears flow. "It's all my fault."
"Listen, you don't have to tell me what happened, but I KNOW that you aren't to blame for any of this." She wrapped her arm around Amy. "Amy, please, trust me: you are at fault for nothing. You're sister is being just awful; and you're grandmother – I'm sure she doesn't mean to but she is totally favouring your sister. And, honestly, I don't know why because you are a fucking Queen compared to her." Amy looked at her as JJ pushed their foreheads together. "I would be proud to call you my sister."
Amy let out another sob and wiped her eyes. "I can't give him up, JJ. He knows what's been going on with me. I promise, there is nothing romantic between us but I need him – and not in a sexual way."
"Talk to your grandmother."
Amy stared off into space. "How bad was it? When your sister died?"
"It was like I lost a limb. I needed her but I've learnt to... adapt. I always have these moments where something happens and I think, 'I need to tell Roz about this' and then I remember that I can't." She looked at Amy. "Amy, I swear to God, if you hurt yourself in any way I will NEVER forgive you."
"I was thinking about running away."
"We could run away together."
Amy bit her lip. "Where would we go?"
"We could start in New York: earn money waitressing on Broadway and then you could get a job as a model and I could write plays and tv shows."
"We could both model and write for Vogue and get free shit. And then we'd live in Paris and eat croissants for breakfast and have an apartment overlooking the Siene."
"And we could winter in Iceland, and Ski and bathe in lakes on top of Geyser."
"And backpack through Europe."
"And then move to London and we could get work in the Globe." Amy's smile fell. "That's never going to happen is it."
"Yes it will. We can make it happen if we really want it."
The girls sat in silence, contemplating their futures.
