CAN'T STAY AWAY
The journey was going to be at least an hour's drive before the transfer would take place. I was just sitting in the back of a police car, sulking to myself for allowing this to happen.
And then suddenly, out of no-where...a car rammed directly into the side of the police vehicle. The police car was driven off the road and crashed against a billboard. The police car sustained a huge dent to the opposite side where I was sitting. The GCPD officer was knocked unconscious by the collision.
The driver of the other car stepped out of the vehicle and moved over to the damaged police car.
The driver knocked on the window.
I was struggling to move my hands which were still chained together. I finally managed to get into a position where I could get a grip on the door handle. I opened the door and swung my legs around. A stretched out hand was offered down to me, taking hold of me and carefully helping me out of the police car.
There stood either a psychopath driving like a lunatic...or a hero trying to rescue me. I very much doubt it was Batman. With blurred vision, I looked up at my saviour.
Oh for fuck sake...welcome aboard the irony train.
Of course...of fucking course it was The Joker. He raided the police officer's pockets and stole the key to my handcuffs. I stretched my wrists out to him angrily. He unlocked my handcuffs and then kissed me.
I backed away from his kiss. "What sick game are you playing?" I asked, rubbing my now-unchained wrists.
"The same game which clearly you're not playing properly." he stated, looking at me disappointedly. "You got arrested again? I thought you would've learnt by now that you can take care of yourself."
I shoved him backwards. "You left me in the rain, in the dark, I was freezing cold and you drove off and said 'goodbye'! Never to see me again!" I shouted. "How much more do you want to hurt me, huh? If breaking my heart, nearly killing me and abandoning me multiple times isn't enough...then what is?"
"You were being taken to Belle Reve. As soon as I found out, I was determined to get you out of this arrest before you got over there. The car took a dent, sure but it's not exactly my car so it doesn't matter. Anyway...are you hurt?"
"Only emotionally..." I said, still angry at him.
"I appreciate your anger, but I had a good reason. This Suicide Squad will get you killed, and I'll gladly kill every one of them to ensure you're safe." he explained. He still cared? How did I know he wasn't making all of this up...just like he usually does. "I meant what I said, Harley." he assured me he was telling the truth.
I believed him. For no other reason than love would he smash up an expensive supercar. Not for fun...well, maybe for fun but that was unlikely. I got the gun from the police officer's holster and pulled the trigger, shooting the officer dead. I then kept hold of the pistol, firmly grasping my finger near the trigger.
Wanting to slowly squeeze the trigger...but how could I?
Joker walked up to me, removed the gun slowly from my hands and placed it on the floor gently. He held me close, rubbing his hand on my back and holding me tightly.
He looked at me, with deep and sincere affection.
"You really are the best boyfriend a girl could ask for...puddin" I slowly wrapped my arms around his body. "I thought I'd really lost you." I said, sadly looking at him.
"I'm always here for you, always" he assured me, kissing my cheek. "Always" he repeated.
I realized just how fake this 'I'm here for you, I'm always here for you' rubbish was. My temper worsened.
"No you're not! You abandoned me so many times I've lost count how many times you've abandoned me! Left me to die and left me on my own!" I shouted, pulling away from his romantic gestures. I blatantly let him know exactly how I was feeling. "Give me one good reason I should forgive you"
"Well...I did just save your life?"
"Only because you put me in danger in the first place!"
"You're a grown woman, you don't need me. You can look after yourself, you even carry a knife around with you all the time."
"Not anymore...the knife is now on the floor somewhere back at the restaurant." I shrugged.
"I always carry a spare" he smiled, getting a knife from his pocket and holding it out in his hand.
I took the knife and flicked the blade, examining it. I then sheathed the blade and tucked it inside my bra, the best place to hide a concealable weapon.
"You're too prepared, you know that" I smiled back at him.
"Come on, I got something I think you'll like." he announced, reaching into the boot of his stolen car.
I wandered over there curiously. He presented the gift in his hands. It was a baseball bat, was this my original 'goodnight' baseball bat?
"Is that my baseball bat?"
"It's a new one, custom-made from the most hard-wearing and hard-hitting material. Finished professionally with the same written decorations you had on it before, plus a few special extra ones I added. The little jester doodle, that's my personal favourite. Know why?"
"Why?"
"Because it reminds me of you" he smiled.
I took the baseball bat from his hands, it felt heavier than my other one...but it was very well crafted. I admired the details closely, rotating it around to see the full extent of the textural decorations.
"It's beautiful" I smiled at him. But then I realized that this might be a distraction to make me fall for his bullshit again. I raised my guard. "This won't make me forgive you, you'll have to do better than that"
"I'm not trying to make you forgive me, Harley. You know yourself you will always run back to me, and I know that I will always run to save you. Even if I intentionally or unintentionally try and kill you, know that I still love you."
"Don't bother sweet talking me...you're just sick, and you made me sick too."
"Sick makes it sound like there's a cure, there is no cure for insanity. You're stuck like it, and so am I. So get used to it, sugar." he said patronizingly.
"I am used to it. I finally understand why I still come running back to you. After everything you've done..."
"And why is that?"
"Because you can't survive without me. And I feel sorry for you."
"Is that so?"
"The thought of losing me made you breakdown and cry...you probably even tried to kill yourself."
"Bravo... Doctor Quinzel makes one heck of a house call, doesn't she?" he clapped his hands slowly. "There's a reason you keep coming back, and you won't figure it out because there is no more psychiatric knowledge in that brain of yours." he explained. "The real reason you keep coming back to me is because you are co-dependant on me. I'm an addiction, one that you must have or you suffer from withdrawal. My emotions don't make any difference to you. And don't pretend that they do."
"What are we, some old married couple arguing? I should've known you were bad news from the moment I met you!" I yelled out.
"You did know, you knew what you signed up for...you got yourself in too deep. I did warn you that you might not like what you see or hear. But did you listen? No...no you didn't. So don't throw the blame at me, it's not my fault."
"How is it not your fault! You deliberately turned me into a psychopath just for your own personal gain!"
"And yet clearly I didn't engrave a deep enough message into your thick skull." he said, grating his teeth towards me.
"You're angry at me? You just left me on my own! And it's not even the first time!"
"And you got yourself arrested, and guess what? It's not even the first time!" he shouted, humorously twisting my words.
I swung my baseball bat at his chest until he collapsed on the floor. When he collapsed on the floor, I kicked him...I kicked him with deep searing aggression. I knelt down to his body, staring him in the eyes with anger. I grabbed him by his hair and held it firmly.
"You going to kill me?" he asked, cackling.
"That's what you want, you want me to kill you. I'd rather just leave you here to bleed."
"Just like in Blackgate huh?" his voice and laughter was painful to listen to. I think it was painful for him to laugh or even speak by now.
I released my grip on his hair. "No, in Blackgate you were an escape route." I prepared the baseball bat and raised it over my head, ready to smash it down and hurt him further. "This time, you'll just be left here to die. Bleed out until you finally just die. Then I won't have to be hurt by you anymore"
"You don't have the guts" he said spitefully.
I threw the baseball bat on the ground and decided to use my fists instead. I punched him in the face. "You made me murder innocent people!" I punched him again. "You made me commit crimes!" I punched him again. "You made me get arrested, and nearly rot in prison!" I punched him again. "You made me into a psychopath!" I punched him again, harder this time. "But the worst thing...the worst thing you did...you made me...you made me actually fall in love with you!" I punched him with increasing anger and rage. Blood was now spilling out from his mouth and was visible on his face.
"I can't help it if I'm so irresistible" he laughed painfully.
"Shut up! Just shut up!" I screamed.
"What's the matter? Are you afraid to accept who you've become?"
"Who I've become? If it wasn't for you...I'd still be working in Arkham!"
"And yet you hated it there" he smirked. "Isn't this much more fun and interesting than that corrupted shit-hole?"
"I guess...I guess it is...fuck...why...how do you always manage to get me to see things from your side?" I asked, feeling depressed and looking at his bleeding face.
"Because if it wasn't for me, you'd be dead."
Fuck...he was right, he saved my life. He saved me from Arkham. He saved me from nearly getting sent back to Belle Reve. And he saved me from...myself. I nearly killed him, and although he's nearly killed me so many times...can I really blame him for my own actions?
I can't...it's not his fault he's like this...he's exactly the same now as when I fell in love with him back at Arkham. Nothing has changed...I realize that I will always love him, he's right.
It's an addiction...and it's killing me.
