RISE AND SHINE
I pounced on Mistah J, dressed in my full jester outfit...domino mask, fun jingly hat, white face-paint and dark makeup.
"Morning puddin!" I shouted excitedly.
A large groan filled the room, he swiped me off the bed. With a thud, my bottom hit the floor. I got straight back up and began bouncing on the bed with happiness.
"What the hell is wrong with you? Go back to sleep!"
"It's seven in the morning, puddin! We have a big day ahead of us!"
He shuffled his body further up the bed, leaning against the head-board and pillow. "...We?"
"Mhm! Today we'll finally get revenge on Gotham and B-man!" I announced.
"Why...would you have a plan for something as big as that?" he asked mid-yawn.
"I read your plans, the ones you left on the table! It's all perfect, I did exactly as you described! Look!" I threw the large blueprint on the bed and unfolded it. The blueprint covered most of the bed once unfolded.
"You stupid girl, that isn't even finished!" he yelled, grabbing the blueprint and throwing it on the floor. "If you want to plan to kill someone, don't! I do the planning, you just mess everything up!" Grumpy Mistah J makes an appearance. "And another thing" he scowled at me. "Don't wake me up in the middle of the night or early in the morning!"
"Why not?" I asked playfully.
"Because I might be half asleep, imagine you're Batman and kill you." he smirked evilly.
"How likely is that?"
"Pretty damn likely... if I'm trying to sleep that means leave me alone."
"That's no fun!" I shoved him off the bed. "I want some fun! You want some fun too!" I leant over him. "Morning puddin! We're gonna have some fun today. Don't even think about being mad at me, today I'm playing Mistah J and you're Harley Quinn!" I giggled at the end of the dictatorship I just gave him.
If his face was any angrier I think he'd be mistaken for a cooked tomato. Hehehehe I'm in such a great mood this morning. His piercing green eyes stared up at me, causing his teeth to bare themselves. I might as well not bother telling him to not be mad at me, I think that makes him more mad.
"Harley..." he started, trying to resist pounding me into the ground and screaming into my ears. "That's an amazing idea" he agreed, smiling and getting up from the floor.
"You're not mad?"
"Why would I be mad?" he paced around the room, rubbing his fingers on his chin. "Oh...maybe because you woke me up when I told you not to!" he shouted. "For, let's see this must've been the third or fourth time?"
"Ordinarily, I'd respect you trying to get some sleep Mistah J...but this is too important!"
"Is it my plans which are unfinished again...?"
"No..."
"Then...by all means...do tell!" he said sarcastically.
"We kill B-man!" I announced excitedly.
"...You've said some stupid shit...but this is just ridiculous. Oh!" he paused. "This is a joke? That's actually a really good one! You'd make a good Mistah J!" he laughed incredibly loudly.
"I was being serious, puddin"
"Oh no, you're the puddin today, puddin" he twisted my words...maybe this whole 'role switch' thing wasn't such a good idea.
"Right...you're playing that game with me...I understand, it was stupid of me to think this would work" I said hopelessly.
"You're Mistah J, you make that decision, puddin!" he stated playfully.
"Alright...enough of this role reverse shit, I don't want to be the plan-maker" I moaned.
"Oh! But puddin, you said you wanted more authority!"
"Whatever, just slap me and get on with the rest of your day" I turned around and braced myself to be hit by his hand, or whatever object was in the room. But there was no violent touch from Mistah J. My eyes were covered by a set of fingers, I was unable to see who it was. "Mistah J?" I asked nervously.
"Nope, not anymore" the voice answered. I tried to scream but one of the hands moved over my mouth and the other grabbed me by the neck. "Christ, Joker really went all out on you, didn't he?" My interrogator presented their face to me, still pinning their hands on my person. "Surprise! I bet your 'puddin' never pulled off something as extreme as this, did he?"
I couldn't believe my eyes, I hoped for my sake that they were lying to me. I blinked. My eyes were not lying to me. It was Empress. Unbelievably...she managed to sneak into the apartment, distract or perhaps even killed my puddin...or maybe had him kidnapped by her other thugs or something...I don't know! Shit...shit!
I was really panicking at this point. Terror was clearly shown in my eyes. I bet she feeds on other people's suffering. I tried to muffle under her gloved hand.
"Harley Quinn...the one true girlfriend to The Joker, what would he offer me for your safety I wonder...?" she asked sinisterly, lifting me up by the head and pulling on one of the ends of my jingly jester hat. She pulled it off my head. "Under all of that makeup and jester crap you're just a pathetic little girl, crying for some attention" she got a knife out from her pocket. "But you won't be getting anymore attention. When I kill you, you'll finally understand what it feels like to be under appreciated..." she clenched her fingers around my jaw, making me perch my lips. "Don't worry, Mistah J is safe and sound... on his way to hell" she said spitefully. I tried to move my mouth, she removed her fingers from my jaw to at least allow me to speak one or two words.
"You bitch! Where's Mistah J!" I asked angrily.
"No wonder he fell for your bullshit, you're so pathetic you're cute" she pounded her lips against mine and closed her eyes, embracing me forcefully. Empress was playing with my emotions further than Mistah J even would. I pushed away from her kiss, wiping my mouth of that disgusting black lipstick she just wiped all over my face. "What's the matter? I thought you liked attention?" she asked, slapping me violently. "As we speak, we're currently making life for your 'puddin' very difficult. Me? Well...I'm here on more...personal matters" she explained, moving the knife around in her fingers and staring down at the blade, and then directing her attention back to me.
"Where is he? And what tha hell are you talkin' about!" I yelled, throwing several objects at her...including a table lamp, a pack of cards and a coin.
They all missed, she effortlessly dodged them. Either that or I was terrible at throwing.
"Where's the fun in that?" she asked ironically. It was ironic because that sounds like something Mistah J would say.
"Stop pretending to be Mistah J! You'll never be better than him... you mean mercenary lady!"
"I'm not sure about you, but when your clown partner in crime teamed up with my cousin I didn't think that was a bad thing..." she paused, throwing the knife angrily. It hit the wall, just inches away from hitting me directly in the head. She fought against any strength I had and pinned me up against the wall, picking the blade out of the fresh hole in the stud-work. "But you just couldn't help yourself, could you?" she put the knife towards my throat. "You just had to finish it, you couldn't leave him breathing...no, that'd mean competition for The Joker. And we both know that wouldn't end well for you." she looked at me seriously. "I bet Jerome is enjoying teaching Joker a lesson. I'm here to return the favour."
I looked at her blankly, with slight horror.
"That's...That's impossible" I muttered.
"Nothing is impossible, my poor naïve little Harley Quinn...maybe you'll learn that soon enough." she wanted to slit my throat...but she decided it'd be more entertaining to keep me alive. She's too much like Joker...it's fucking creepy. She reached into her leather jacket and pulled out a loaded revolver from the holster around her waist. She released her grip, throwing the knife on the ground but held the gun in my face instead. "Now you're in my funhouse, and the rules have changed" she laughed. Basically imagine Mistah J's laugh, and then add about one hundred percent more creepiness to it. "Maybe Joker will emerge out of this little therapy session and finally have the balls to put a bullet in your head. Would I? I could...but you're too useful" she smirked.
"Why are you really here?" I asked bluntly.
"Oooh! Getting to the point, I like it! Hell, I might even go lesbian for you." she winked. Empress leaned in and licked my cheek flirtatiously. My face was cringing at her attempted affection. "You don't believe I'm here to kill you because you murdered my cousin?" she adjusted her finger nearer to the trigger. "Well...in a way you're right...because I want you alive. I want you to see the look on his face when I finally put my blade into his skin and rip him apart. Then that bond between the both of you will be broken."
"And then what will happen ta me?" I asked nervously.
As much as I wanted to scream at Empress, try and kill her and everything else...well, I can't because she's literally holding a gun just centimetres away from my face. And her finger is positioned firmly on the trigger.
"You'll either be dead or in a relationship with yours truly. Then we'll see how much you like abusive relationships. If you thought Joker's love was painful...then welcome to your living nightmare" she smiled maniacally. "I am your living nightmare. Jerome is your living hell"
"I'd sooner put a bullet in mah own brain then become yur girlfriend!" I shouted, putting my hands on the gun and pointing it closer to my head. "I'm not scared of a gun! I've had enough'a them pointed at mah head than I can count!"
"No, you're not scared of dying." she paused, seemingly analysing my emotional state. "You're scared of losing Joker, you're scared of losing your sanity. Although Joker supposedly 'changed' you into Harley Quinn...I can see within five minutes that Doctor Harleen Quinzel is still inside of you, and you're scared to admit it." she could see my emotions, she could read my fears from giving her nothing than what she wanted...pure terror. "I can see your fears, and unlike Scarecrow's fear gas... this isn't a hallucination." she stroked my head, running her gloved fingers through the strands of my hair. "I prefer you without that ugly jester hat, you're much more simple...a lot easier to understand." she smirked, removing the domino mask from my eyes. "Why hide your true self behind a mask? Masks are made to be worn to keep others from suspecting who we really are. I know everything about you, Harley Quinn. I know more than your 'puddin' ever will."
"Prove it" I said.
"The fact that your legs are trembling, and that you haven't grabbed this gun and shot me in the face yet... proves enough. I know you're easily capable of killing me, and yet you're forcing yourself against it. It's almost like that minuscule percentage of sanity is speaking up and proving all my theories to be correct."
"Theories?" I asked curiously.
"You don't love The Joker"
Those words...the fact she even had the audacity to say such a thing to me was enough to make me want to kill her. My nose crinkled, my eyes pierced into her arrogance.
"Fuck...you" I looked directly at her, showing my seething frustration.
She kept the gun pointed at my face and got out her smartphone from her pocket. She was calling someone, I wasn't sure who it was. I couldn't hear the person on the other side, but I could only assume it was something to do with Mistah J.
"Mhm, yep. Oh, she's just peachy." she giggled. What's that? Yeah sure, I bet she wants to talk." she pressed a button to make the call go on speaker. She offered the phone close to my mouth.
"Harley?" he asked. Mistah J! It was his voice, but he sounded in pain.
"Puddin!" I shouted sadly.
"Harley...listen, I'm in a pretty shit situation here...Jerome's alive...I have no fucking idea how but he's alive...and he's watching me right now." he explained. "Batman's now on his way to help, I know it was stupid but I haven't got many minutes left, he'll burst through here any moment...I hope you're alright, my beautiful girl." his voice turned more like a whisper...but Empress heard all of it. I heard his head get slammed into the table and then the thug resumed control of the phone, Empress took the call off speaker.
"Yeah, she's fucking mental...no of course she won't do anything, she's a broken down mess. By the way, Joker called Batman...be prepared for a fight. No matter what...that clown does not get out of there alive...got it?" she ordered, ending the call and shoving the phone back in her pocket.
"You won't get away with this." I stated.
"I already have" she smirked. "When The Batman follows my carefully planned trail of crime, he'll fall right into my trap. I have a whole team of professional female assassins waiting for his arrival." she smiled at me. "Don't worry, Joker's death will be really slow and painful...just like yours!" she explained, grabbing me from behind and pointing the gun at the side of my head.
