this is my longest chapter yet. im strangely proud.

but anyways, someone recently pointed out that there are cars in the naruto universe - a fact that i was unaware of.

(in my defense, it has been a loooonng while since i read/watched naruto)

it was also mentioned that sasuke had mangekyo even before he knew the truth about itachi.

and i would like to point out that while implied, i never did say that he didn't have mangekyo. all i did was say that he didn't have the eternal variation.

and i never revealed whether or not he knows, did i?

;)

thanks for reading!


PART FOUR

The castle was huge. And according to Hogwarts: A History, it was filled with secret passageways and moving staircases. Honestly, the building would most likely prove to be just as much a headache as the wizards residing within it.

Sasuke had decided to move into the castle a few days before the students did, hoping to at least get some idea of his surroundings. So far, he'd found that the task was far more difficult than he'd expected, as not only was the castle constantly moving, but the resident poltergeist seemed to take immense pleasure in harassing the shinobi.

He would've done something about the ghost they called Peeves, but he had yet to see the thing in person. All of the pranks had all been carefully planned traps. (Sasuke had managed to avoid all of them, but some were too close for comfort.)

The paintings are a pain in the ass, too, he thought, trying to ignore the enchanted artwork. They'd bothered him incessantly since he'd began combing the castle, setting detection traps and the like. Some were well-intentioned, others downright malicious. But they were noisy and distracting, so it was a relief to set down the last trap and retreat to the room he'd been given.

It was large - almost unnecessarily so - and very luxurious, something Sasuke could appreciate. And it was conveniently placed in an area that was a good mix between "near the kitchens" and "tucked away in an obscure corner of the castle that was unlikely to be discovered by nosy little kids".

And to no surprise, he had found numerous listening devices, but ultimately decided to let them be. Not even Naruto would have been stupid enough to just blurt out sensitive information. And anyway, asides from the contact (whose name Sasuke still couldn't quite make out) , who would be sneaking in and out regularly to personally deliver messages and reports, he had no-one to talk to.

Which was, in all honesty, fine with him.

The Sharingan-user picked up a small, almost blindingly pink letter and opened it, scanning the contents for what seemed to be the millionth time. The missive was, in short, a type of threat/warning about some Ministry woman who would be "helping him settle into life in the most esteemed school in all of Wizarding Britain" and "supervising the professors and their teaching methods".

A spy.


Sasuke frowned at the painfully pink (it seemed to be her color, unfortunately) , rather toad-ish woman sitting at the table, smug expression on her face. The students had only begun to notice her, now that the Sorting Hat was finished with the last kid and she had made some comment about how things were when she was a student.

He rolled his eyes, not really listening to the Headmaster welcome the wizards back to Hogwarts. It was only when the woman interrupted with an obviously fake, airy cough that he began to focus on the proceedings. The surrounding professors seemed torn between indignation and surprise, a reaction mirrored by the students, as the woman stood up and began her rather patronizing introduction. Sasuke stiffened as her tone changed into something a little more business-like.

Damn.

At this point in time, he had about three options…

The Uchiha's mind raced, trying to figure out which course of action would be the best. As his train of thought came to a close, Dumbledore beckoned him over. Raising a dark eyebrow, he shunshin-ed to the table, eliciting a collective gasp from the congregated wizards.

"You must be the shinobi that Minister Fudge speaks so much of," the toad simpered (she had admittedly recovered fast from the shock of what Sasuke was pretty sure she thought was Apparition in Hogwarts - a feat described as impossible). "I am Dolores Umbridge, we will most likely be working together at one point or another."

Sasuke resisted the urge to gag. Absolutely not, he thought venomously, although on the surface, he made sure to maintain a collected facade. " …" it was pretty obvious that she was expecting a response. He contemplated just leaving right there in a fit of childlike vindictiveness, but eventually voted against it, after a long and rather uncomfortable stretch of silence. "Uchiha Sasuke."

"A pleasure," she said, holding out a hand.

This time, after a curt "Likewise", he did leave.


The rumors had set flight remarkably fast. It started with his abrupt appearance, and ended with his mask. He didn't actively take part in the rumors, but did keep and ear out for any particularly interesting (or worse, accurate) versions.

One, in particular, had been spot-on. At first, he had been the slightest bit concerned that his cover - not really much of a cover, as anyone who was familiar with the name "Uchiha Sasuke" would have known - had been blown, but remembered that to anyone else, it was just another outlandish story. Especially because the guess had come from a Ravenclaw they called "Loony" Lovegood. He'd decided to investigate, but came to the conclusion that the girl, actually named Luna, was harmless, if not a little strange.

And anyway, if she did prove to be a real threat, she would be dealt with.

Sasuke sighed silently, trying to clear his head when the shinobi had spotted a certain pink-clad woman almost waddling his way. Unbidden, his brain made the calculations to how long it would be before she reached him.

Plenty of time to leave. Or to kill her, come to think of it.

Sasuke smirked. As if he hadn't thought of that already.

"Umbridge," he said once she came within earshot. "Do you need something?"

The woman was flustered (The takeover of the school probably isn't going as smoothly as she thought) , but she managed to nod and say, "Yes, but in private" in a certain tone that oozed arrogant superiority.

In short, she was looking down at him, a thought that sent his blood boiling as he followed her to a less populated corridor.

What does she even need me for? he wondered, though a part of him did have a sneaking suspicion.

"The Ministry needs your help."

Sasuke didn't bother to suppress the cold grin dominating his features - it wasn't like anyone could see his face anyways.

Minister Fudge pulled through.

"The payment is 10,000 Galleons."

Ten times the amount Hogwarts offered.

This was going to be fun.


thanks again for reading, my awesome potatoes!

(i cant tell whether or not that was a hetalia reference...) (eh, whatever)

please review.