A/N: because where else am i going to throw these stupid ideas? XD
Wishy and i needed something stupid and fluffy, so here's some bad jokes about kink-stuff Blake and Yang get into while bored with Sun away back at Haven~ XD
ENJOY!
Mal-Wyvern
In another universe where the Vytal Festival wasn't ruined, Grimm and White Fang didn't invade, Maiden power shenanigans didn't happen and Pyrrha Nikos won the tournament like everyone assumed she would, things went off without a hitch and life returned to 'relative' normal for the students at Beacon.
Well, sort of, the foreign students had to return to their home countries and schools, a few with promises to visit when they could. Such as Sun who gave his girls a big hug and promised to send them both as many pictures of his Abs, and other things, to make sure they didn't forget him, while Yang promised to send plenty of 'videos' of her and Blake to keep him warm at night.
Weiss completely ignored Neptune as he tried to give her a giant bouquet of white roses…
Ruby was zipping around all the new people she met, saying her farewells and got the life squeezed out of her from Penny who promised to sneak her way back to Beacon when she could.
A week or two and things were again 'relatively' back to normal…
"Hey, Blake! Check out what I got!"
Blake, who was currently reading a book (that was totallynot porn) as she lounged on her bed. Yang had gotten some package and she was half convinced it was just another stack of pictures of Sun's abs, which they both enjoyed greatly and probably sold a few off for a tidy sum. Her enhanced hearing picked up a bit more than the usual flapping of photo paper, in fact that sounded like some plastic, and metal and-what?
Now fully curious, Blake slid her totally-not-porn-book down to spy the blonde brawler and what she was unwrapping. Instantly her amber eyes widened and she held the book to her face to hide the obvious blush, "Y-Yang?! What the-How the-Why the-… wha-?"
"Hehe!" while the cat girl blinked and tried adamantly to hide her obviously growing blush, Yang just smirked like she'd won the lottery, "Oh this?" what she held in her hand jingled, consisting of a holster with a belt and a very specific rubber piece, "Oh noooooothing… hehe," Yang slid the piece down, running her finger along the ribbed surface, being as obviously suggestive as possible as Blake's grip on her book got tighter, "Why it's just a human sized cat dick, courtesy of Mal-Wyvern~"
At this point Blake was positively twitching, her amber eyes dared a glance at the box that thing had come in and yes, right there, on the top was the trademark Mal-Wyvern logo. Her cat ears twitched as she looked back up at her partner who seemed in the process of putting the holster on, wrapping it around her waist and not seeming to bother taking her clothes off, "Uh… wha-?"
With her tongue sticking out, Yang pulled the side straps, fitting the holster on snuggly, even if it was over her clothes figuring to just test it out. She could alter the fit later, this was just too much of a fun opportunity to screw with Blake considering the look on her girlfriend's face, "I know, I know, it's totally racist, but I figured I'd have to try it AT LEAST once," a snicker as she turned to see Blake still staring, "Between you and Sun, I feel so left out as just little ol' me~"
Blake's brow twitched, her eyes darting right to that thing on Yang's waist, "That-That looks painful…" not that the idea stopped any of the blush rising to her face or the sudden warmth below her stomach.
Yang smugly walked over to her girlfriend, leaning on one arm and staring at Blake with the cockiest grin known to man, "Oh, but its ribbed for your pleasure~"
At this point Blake was obviously vibrating as her brain went completely blank.
Seeing she had no resistance, Yang tucked her finger over the book her partner had been reading, easily taking it out of her hands and standing back up to flip through a few pages, "I mean, I know you guys are basically human other than a few things, but I figured, why not~ Mal-Wyvern's right there on the Net, and they live for this kinda perverted stuff right?" flipping a few pages still getting no response from Blake, "Besides, I'm sure they got pervy stuff like this in your books," stops at one page and her grin spreads, "Damn, is this guy a Unicorn Faunus or Narwhale?"
Suddenly Blake's hand reaches up, but instead of grabbing the book she grabs Yang's collar and pulls her girlfriend close enough to almost kiss her, amber eyes glaring that specific way that Yang knew meant her porn wasn't enough at the moment.
Yang gave that cocky grin, throwing the book over her shoulder, "So, am I going to get you yowling tonight my sexy kitty?"
There was a sudden look of challenge in the cat Faunus' eyes as she tugged on her partner's collar, speaking directly to her lips, "Why don't you come here and find out," and if either didn't notice there was a sudden rumble to her voice, almost like a purr.
SLAM!
Sadly, this delightful scene was interrupted by Weiss and Ruby walking in, like they normally would since this was also their room.
… but the second they noticed what was going on, wide lilac eyes staring at them and amber ones glaring, they paused.
Ruby's mouth fell open, unable to comprehend.
Weiss started twitching, unable to say anything.
"Uh…" Yang looked like a deer in headlights, standing there, in her clothes, with a cat-styled dildo in a holster around her waist, "I can explain?"
There was a distinct sound almost like growling as Blake's bow was oddly low.
White brow twitching, Weiss quickly grabbed Ruby and slammed the door shut. Taking another moment to twitch the heiress grabbed her partner's arm and started dragging her down the hall.
"Wait! WEISS!" Ruby flailed, trying to get her partner's attention, "Why did my sister have a-mphpphhmm…?" silver eyes blinked as the older girl had turned around, still twitching, and put her hand over Ruby's mouth.
"Nothing!" Weiss said sternly, "We saw! NOTHING!" then dragged her off to the gym for some practice.
Ver. 2
"Hey Blake! Check out what I got!"
Blake's bow twitched as her nose was buried in one of her books (totally not porn) as her partner went about unwrapping some package she'd gotten. For a minute the cat Faunus ignored the blonde brawler as she was really getting into the steamy bits of her story… until the sound of bubble wrap, a few pops, some whirring and Yang snickering to herself caught her attention.
Now curious, Blake raised a black brow as she lowered her totally-not-porn book just enough to glance at her partner. She was rather comfortable on her bed, laying down mostly and hoped Yang hadn't gotten something ridiculous that would throw her off-that is until she caught a look of something yellow and wiggling and her bow perked up and her eyes locked on this new thing.
"Teeheehehe…" Yang was giggling to herself fiddling with a little remote as her latest 'toy' moved about. Apparently this time she'd gotten what looked to be a pair of yellow cat ears that sat on her head and a matching tail that easily attached to a belt around her waist. The odd thing was both moved, not just regular stationary stuffed ludicrous Fake-Faunus stuff, these ones seemed to be fairly high tech as the second Yang stopped fiddling with the remote she put it in her pocket, and wiggling her brows, the ears and tail seemed to act accordingly to what 'mood' she was displaying.
Blake was now sitting up and staring at her girlfriend.
After testing out wiggling the tail, the blonde looked around to make sure it was working and spotted her partner staring at her. "Blake!" she jumped up and down running to right in front of her girlfriend, wiggling the ears, "Check this thing out! It's so freakin' awesome!"
The yellow cat ears wiggled and so did the tail, and Blake's amber eyes seemed to widen as she couldn't look away, "Buh… wha-?"
Yang sounded like she was squealing, probably one of the only things that made it obvious she was related to Ruby in anyway, as she stood up, arms close to her chest and bouncing, the tail sticking straight up and the ears flat, "I figured if I was gonna get this silly crap I'd go for the bitchin' high tech stuff," she leaned over pointing at the ears as they moved, "The ears got some weirdass receiver that makes them react to moods, which link up with the tail to do the same, so supposedly they react like a normal animal or Faunus features so-er, Blake?" she stopped talking when she noticed Blake had this glazed look on her face.
Then as if in a haze, the Feline-Faunus just raised her hand, putting one finger on her girlfriend's lips to keep her quiet, "Shhhh…" she only removed it when Yang's blonde brows quirked and the ears reacted accordingly. Blake made a gesture with her hand, "Now, turn…"
"Er, Blake?" that blonde brow remained up.
Amber eyes narrowed and her bow went low, "I said turn."
Yang gave her partner a startled look, she didn't normally give commands, but whatever! "Kay?" the blonde brawler stood up about a foot away and spun around.
"Slower…" there was a bit of a rumble to Blake's voice as her eyes seemed to get narrower.
A blonde brow rose as something popped into her head, Yang smirked, putting one hand on her hip and the other on her chest, turning to the side and giving as sultry a look as possible, feeling as the tail went mostly up and waved slightly with the robotic ears down, "Why Blake," her voice was low, lilac eyes narrowing with a wide smirk on her face as she leaned over, obviously posing to accent her butt and breasts, "You like what you see~"
There was definitely some manner of rumbling coming from the cat woman, in fact she seemed to be shaking.
Lilac eyes blinked somewhat surprised, "Uh, Blake, you're vibrating," her eyes went a bit wider as some manner of wicked smirk started to form on her partner's face and a chill went down Yang's spine, "You don't even do that when you're reading…"
Blake gave her partner something of a smug Cheshire smirk before quickly grabbing her and tossing her on her bed on her stomach.
Yang had all of a moment to squeak, pushing her face up from the foot of Blake's bed before she felt the black clad girl straddle her just below her butt, feeling a slight tug at the belt around her waist, "Uh, Blake?!" there may have been a squeak in her voice.
Blake sat for a moment on her partner's firm ass, tugging at the mechanical tail as she played with it, before her amber eyes locked with the almost scared lilac ones looking at her from over the blonde's shoulder. Then the feline Faunus smirked, stretching out her lilt body along her partner's back, pushing her long hair out of the way and making sure she felt every inch of her, "Yang, you know how when cats are out of season they like to stick around their own sex?"
Yang's mind went blank.
Blake could feel the tail trying to stand up on her stomach and it was absolutely adorable the way those fake ears went flat as Yang was obviously processing. Not caring, and making sure her female lover understood her meaning by laying her weight on her back and letting her feel herself purr, Blake reached forward and bit the back of Yang's neck.
"uh-uh-huhhhhhh…" this time there was definitely a squeak.
SLAM!
The door burst open as Weiss and Ruby walked in…
… and the second they spotted Blake straddled on what appeared to be a stupidly euphoric Yang, with some weird yellow cat ears on her head, and Blake of all things biting her neck glaring at them, they stopped.
Ruby was staring dumbfounded, unable to process what was going on.
Weiss started twitching, then pointing at them with vicious fury, "WOULD YOU TWO STOP HAVING SEX!"
There was a growl from Blake and some incomprehensible sound from Yang, who looked to be close to drooling.
With an angry screech Weiss turned around and dragged Ruby out before the poor girl was scarred by the perverted sex games of her sister.
"Buh?" Ruby managed as she was being dragged away from their room, "Weiss… I don't…. understand? Wh-why was Blake on top of Yang? Were they wrestling?"
"YES RUBY!" Weiss shouted in fury, "THEY WERE WRESTLING! AND NOTHING ELSE!" meanwhile in her head she was plotting how many different ways she could get the two of them spayed.
A/N: i write this purely to screw with Weiss~ there's just something fun about her yelling and Ruby being adorably 'what?'
and yes, Mal-Wyvern is Bad Dragon... if you look it up, its your own fault XD providing niche stuff for everyone~ no matter the universe~ XD
Review? :D
Till next -salute-waves- Sayounara, Mina!
-Ikasury
