Jack spent the last few days before the break virtually silent and alone at school. Even Lindsay sensed his mood and left him alone. It was for the best: otherwise he was not sure he could have kept to a civil tongue. He was irritable and actually talked back at his father when the man decided to offer his critique of Jack's form in sparring.
When he had arrived at the tournament he felt like all his preparation was in vain. He was bone tired. He slept poorly and when he managed to sleep, he was plagued by dreams of Kim running away from him or worse, running towards Kai. He fell back into his quiet and stoic behavior and his father was visibly pleased. He was talking about a proper gift for Jack if he brought victory. His mother looked at him searchingly and asked him once whether he wanted another afternoon together. Part of him wanted to spend time with mom. To soak the feeling of being loved without conditions. Somehow he didn't feel worthy of it. Perhaps in some ways he wanted to punish himself. Knowing that he failed Kim made him want to at least succeed in being his father's son. So he trained. And worked. And listen to his father. And ignored the increasingly hollow feeling inside and a heavy chest.
It was his sensei who sat him down and made him tell what happened between him and Kai. In a stillted language with awkward pauses Jack managed to tell Rudy the entire story of him and Kai and their last conversation. He managed to avoid a direct mention of Kim, only vaguely saying that there was a common acquaintance who happened to witness the entire exchange. He told Rudy that he wanted to warn them of Kai and that he probably succeeded, making himself just as unpalatable as Kai.
"So you see, I failed as a martial artist to keep a level head. I disappointed my father and, I think, I pretty much guaranteed that Kai would try something sneaky tomorrow."
Rudy was silent for a moment and then patted Jack on his back.
"Jack, I am old enough to be your older brother so I will give you this advice. You are bound to ignore it, as it's not about Karate, but I'll do it anyway. Being studious in school and dojo is admirable. Being respectful of your father is too. But those things alone in and of themselves won't make you happy."
"I never thought that happiness is the goal of Karate. Or in following father's wishes."
"Yes, but unhappiness is not a necessary byproduct either. In the end, it's your life and you will live it."
The next day was the day of the tournament and Jack fought through his roster, making to the final round in his category as expected.
Just as Kai made it.
During the break, fully expecting something underhanded, Jack remained in the main hall with Rudy by his side and in full view of judges. He looked up to see his father sitting proudly among the audience and sighed. Sometimes he wished his grandfather alive. Grandpa Brewer managed to unite the honor code implicit in all martial arts with the competitiveness of the sport. He also could curb everyone's behaviors, reminding his sons that they were family first.
He kept looking at the crowd, not finding his uncle Thomas. This happened often. His uncle was busy and travelled a lot. He had a crew of people, who were trained in various martial arts and could be used as stunt doubles or extras on sets. He was constantly away and training his crew and couldn't always make it to Kai's competitions. Instead, Kai's mother was there and she looked just as excited being here as she would be visiting the dentist. If Jack were inclined to be fair to his cousin he would feel some sympathy for him. While Jack had his father meticulously planning his life, Kai was often left to his own devices.
He saw his mother and took a second look to make sure. She stopped coming to this sort of events long time ago. She wasn't a martial artist and didn't always know what he did or accomplished. She was proud of him, to be sure... But at some point, only fellow practitioners could fully understand what has been done or what happened during the fight. Slowly but surely she was fazed out of conversations and eventually she stopped coming altogether. That she came to this particular tournament more than anything told Jack that his emotional equilibrium has not being the same. His mother felt that she needed to be there for him. At once grateful and ashamed, he nodded at her.
Then came the moment when their names were announced. It always threw people off when the match was preceded by Brewer vs. Brewer.
Putting his helmet on and trying to clear his mind, Jack stepped into the center of the mat just as Kai did the same.
They circled each other on the mats, neither making the first move.
"What's the matter, cous? Did that feisty blonde douse you after all? You lost you fighting spirit?" Kai was smirking and baiting.
"No more than she did you, you creep. Yeah, that's right. That's what she calls you behind your back. I don't date by choice, you... You must be desperate if you resort to stalking." Jack apparently wasn't above cheap shots. This particular one seemed to have landed well, if the momentary twitching of Kai's right eye was any indication. Then his expression smoothed.
"Oh, I don't need to stalk. Didn't you know? I am to share the Thanksgiving meal with her. I bet her pie is delicious..." Kai finished triumphantly and his smile was all teeth.
Jack literally saw red. He didn't know how it came about and he was sure that Kim had not willingly agreed to any of it, but he apparently hasn't quite let go of being hung-up on her and he finally stopped moving and raised his clenched fists.
Kai shifted his right foot forward, but before he could execute a move Jack had landed two solid punches to his stomach throwing Kai off balance. Before Kai could recover, Jack went in for the attack. His fist met the Kai's side in a harsh blow. Completely off balance now, Kai aimed a poor punch at Jack. At lightening speeds, Jack side stepped the punch, and sent a forceful kick towards his cousin. His foot connected with Kai's wrist. One could almost hear the crack from where the foot met the hand.
Jack stepped back half expecting the fight to be over and the judge to call it, but Kai wasn't down yet and he didn't back down.
Instead Kai seemed to snap just like his wrist had, and he stepped forward using his long legs to his advantage. He threw an onslaught of kicks and punches towards Jack. A few sunk into him. One hit him on his thigh and he knew he'd have a bruise there. One grazed his face, where he knew if he hadn't had helmet, it would have caused a black eye. Unfazed by it, Jack danced away from any more kicks and ducked down avoiding any more punches, and, when Kai left an opening, he jabbed his cousin's stomach. As Kai went to shield his stomach from the attack, Jack sprang up into a kick with a flip, allowing for two blows directed at Kai's head and face. Both kicks connected perfectly. This was enough to send Kai down and the fight was finally over. The judge called it for Jack and he stood there, breathing heavily and watched his cousin weakly getting up. The whole match could not have lasted more than ten minutes, yet his muscles trembled and the exhaustion settled in.
The crowd clapped and he could hear his father's voice cheering him on, but it was coming to him as if he was underwater. His sight was fixed on Kai. The fight, the rage were slowly leaving him and he was disgusted, horrified, ashamed at what he has done. What he had wanted to continued to do. The utter brutality and animalistic hunger that he felt had completely surprised Jack. He had circled his opponent and sized him up. He played to the cousin's weaknesses and put him in situations where Kai's strengths didn't matter.
The win was perfect and, in some ways, graceful. The aftermath of the rage that Jack felt was less so. The fact that his father cheered so loudly and that Kai looked at him with certain respect, made him sick.
He was no better than them. He was just like them. He was what his father wanted: competitive and willing to hurt to win. He saw his mother and her face... her expression... her eyes... It was true then: there would not be any more quiet afternoons cooking together. She probably wouldn't want that.
He barely had time to make it for the bathroom before he dry heaved in the stall.
Kim saw Jack, impossibly quiet and deliberately disinterested in everything that school had to offer, and she almost thought that he regretted his words and actions in the GreenBean. But, she was still smarting from his dismissal and disappointment over her miscalculation. She pushed away any concerns she had for him and relished in feeling offended and proven right in her own first impressions.
Thankfully, the fall break came and she could avoid seeing the frustrating boy for a bit. She roped in both Milton and Jerry to come with her to check the animal shelter that she thought was double billed. There were three more addresses in her list that she added on. Milton was thinking the culprit was the computer bug or negligence of the previous volunteer, who had Kim's job. Jerry was more inclined to think that someone was cheating the charity off. Since both were convinced that they were right, Kim used it as a leverage to get both of them to come with her.
They piled into the Geronimo and made their way to the address listed. On the way there, they grilled her about the altercation between Jack and Kai. Apparently the news of it trickled down through the grapevine and people wanted details. Of course, Kim was at ground zero, so to speak, and they wanted to hear from her.
Kim was ambivalent about what to say. She wouldn't deny that the trash talk between cousins was a juicy bit of gossip. She felt that it was less so, when you consider that she was somehow the unwilling subject used for the said trash talk
She didn't flatter herself: it had little to do with her and was entirely about the two guys and their egos. She was conveniently there and Kai was a nasty sort to try and unsettle his cousin by getting at his acquaintances, however perfunctory.
She settled on telling her friends that the fight wasn't physical - because in Jerry's retelling the two cousins were bruised and bleeding - and it essentially was a sports trash talk between two competitors. She did not tell them of her own involvement.
"It makes sense. They will have to face each other in the upcoming tournament. The way I understand it, a lot of things ride on it. You know from Julie that their sensei are sort of feuding. And their fathers are also always competing... It makes sense that all these factors contribute to the animosity between them. And in light of the serious tournament, you can understand that they will be under pressure."
Milton's words were reasonable. And completely on point. And maybe Kim would have been more willing to hear them, had it not been for her personal disappointment.
"I get that, I do. But he has a choice not to to engage in this rivalry. Ultimately it was he who chose to go ahead and make it about prevailing over his cousin, instead of concentrating on being his best in karate. All martial arts are about self discipline and inner balance, not about winning. This attitude will not help him. After all, when his father is gone and he is no longer competing, that cousin of his would be his only family."
She delivered this piece of wisdom with all conviction and certainty that she didn't have and both boys left it at that. Kim though wasn't off the hook yet. Jerry had another bit of gossip. It would seem that Randy was determined that Kim actually liked him and only stayed away because of the conflict with his basketball obligations and friendships with the cheerleaders. Apparently even Randy understood that Donna had officially shunned Kim. So the rumor had it, Randy was planning some sort of grand gesture to prove to Kim he is serious about them (what? how?) and has been campaigning for the jocks to accept Kim despite the official warning from Donna.
He even picked on Jerry because he thought that Jerry had sights on her. And the time Kim flipped him over his head was the final thing to make Randy certain that he liked her and wanted her.
Kim now lamented her own bit if cleverness in the lunch room that first time he talked to her. She thought she diffused the situation, but it actually might backfire. Beyond the truly shocking notion that he thought she liked him, was the mortification knowing that he talked about it to others (Brody and jocks) and who knew? Maybe someone believed him.
She didn't dwell on the fact that a certain pony-tailed athlete might have heard this bit of gossip. And that it made her feel all sorts of uncomfortable. There was nothing between them. They weren't even a 'pleasant acquaintances.' At least not according to him. So why was she discomfited at the thought that he might believe Randy and his delusions? She needed to stop thinking about him.
And she would deal with Randy problem when it became an issue.
