Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, because the gayness in the actual story just wasn't there.
A/N: I am foolish as fuck and people at my college are finally started to discover the level of which I can about them or their feelings towards me is nonexistent. If you don't like me that's cool cause I didn't get my ass out of bed this morning to see or please you. Sorry ranting...
For texting Bold is for the strange texter, and Italic Bold is Bella
I don't what has been going on with me today, and I don't know what this feeling is in my chest. I feel like I should be comatose since Edward just left me and he is supposed to be my soul mate, but right now with Tanya in my presence it doesn't feel as pain. Not to say I don't feel my heart clench when I think about him or any of the Cullen's, but with Tanya I don't think she would allow my world to fall apart around me. I'm not sure how I feel about this.
Tanya P.O.V.
It has been almost two months since Bella and I sat in her kitchen playing 20 questions while she ate breakfast. I really had fun talking to her. I found out that she had only moved to Forks a year prior to live with her father Charlie. Her mother Renee lives with her new husband Phil while they travel because he plays minor league baseball. I found other interesting facts about her too, and I still have the urge to learn more.
"Thinking about Bella are we?" My sister Kate asks as she sliding into the sit next to me on the couch. We are currently occupying the Cullen's old house until the one we've been meaning to build for a while is ready. Luck for us Carmen was ready and we already have a good amount of it done already in this past few months. I don't particularly care for this house too much.
"Of course I am. I'm also thinking about our movie marathon at her house tonight." After Bella and I finished our game of 20 questions I felt like she had shared enough. I didn't want to overdo it in risk of her shutting down. So I suggested we watch a movie. One turned into two that somehow turned into an all-day thing.
"Is somebody planning on getting some lovin' tonight?" Kate asked with and evil smile.
"Even if I was, which I'm not, why would I tell you?"
"Because I'm your favorite sister and you wouldn't be able to hide it from me if you did." Well she had one good point there.
"First off you're not my favorite since I don't have favorite. Second, I can hide whatever I want considering it's my mate I don't have to tell you anything. Finally, Bella still isn't over Edward so there will be nothing happening today except movies and maybe talking." I love Kate really I do, but she knows Bella is a delicate subject right now and I don't appreciate the sex jokes.
"Must you always be so serious? I'm just trying to lighten the mood and kill some time before you have to good!" She can be a brat sometimes I swear.
"Well stop. Bella and I are in a good place right now and I don't need you messing with that. She is finally starting to open up and I don't need to have sex on the brain while we talk."
"Fair enough, and shouldn't you be heading that way now?" I look at the clock and quickly race out of the house. I left Bella this morning after she woke up and promised to be back in two hours. I'm also making her promises and making sure I keep them so she can see that I can be trusted.
I stop long enough to say hi to Irina, Carmen, and Eleazar as they come back from their hunt and then continue to Bella's house. It only takes me about 5 minutes to get there and lucky for me I have 1 minute to spare. I gently knock on the door and wait.
"You know you can just come in right?" Bella says as she answers the door with a smile.
"I could do that yes since you never lock any of your doors." I say with a bit of annoyance. "But it's rude to just walk into somebody's house like that unless you're family." I say as I walk past her in the living room and take my now usual spot on her couch. Throughout the weeks I have been coming home with Bella after school and helping her with her homework since that used to be either Edward or Alice's job. In that time I have claimed a designated spot on her couch.
"Whatever you say," Bella says as she closes the door and joins me on the couch.
"So what moves are we watching today, or are we just going to watch whatever on the cable?" I noticed Bella had a very distant look on her face.
"Tanya, can we talk for a bit instead of what movies?" She asked as she turns to face me as she tucks one of her legs underneath her.
"Of course we can angel. What would you like to talk about?" I ask as I turn towards her allowing her my full and undivided attention.
"Have you heard from the Cullen's?" I feel like she's trying to get the harder questions out of the way right off the bat.
"Yes, but that was simply because one of them called me." I'm really hoping she doesn't ask which one it was.
"Okay," She says as she slowly nods her head as she thinks.
"Would you like me to call them?" It pains me to ask her that, but if that is what would make her happy then I will do it. I'm really hoping she says no.
"No, I don't believe I want to see or talk to any of them right now." Yay!
"Is there something else you want to talk about?" I ask as I see her fidgeting with her fingers still not looking at me.
"No," she says unsure.
"Bella look at me please." I whisper as I place my hand under her chin and gently encourage her to make eye contact with me. "What's on your mind?" I ask still whispering.
"Why are you still here? I mean you've come over every day after school to help me with my homework, you come over every night after Charlie goes to bed to stay with me so I can sleep, you call me angel, and I just don't understand." I could easily see confusion and fear in her eyes.
"What are you afraid of?" I decide to ask her before I answer her question.
"Right now I honestly don't know. Everything is just so confusing right now and you're just appeared out of nowhere! I feel like in all this time I don't really know anything about you besides your name, where you're from, and a few things about your family." Well she kind of has been doing most of the talking these past few weeks. Whenever she felt like opening up I did feel the need to interrupt her, and when we weren't talking about her we were talking about whatever random thing that we thought of.
"What would you like to know?" I hoping she will forget about her earlier questions because she isn't ready for the truth and I don't want to lie to her.
"How old are you?"
"I don't know the exact number anymore, but I'm sure I could figure it out if I truly thought about it. But to answer your question I am over 1000 years old." She looked at me amazed.
"Out of the Cullen's Carlisle was the oldest at only about 300. You seem more modern then he is?" She doesn't flinch anymore when any of the Cullen's is mentioned except for Edward. That's still a fresh wound. I never found out what he said to her in the woods that broke her.
"We make more of an effort than they do to keep up to date with the current culture. I may be over 1000 years old, but that doesn't mean I have to act like it for the rest of eternity." I don't agree with how set in their ways the Cullen's are. It's like they are forever stuck in the era they were turned in even though the world continues to change around them.
"Do all of you go to high school over and over again like they do?"
"Oh god no everybody in my coven was turned to late in life for anybody to mistake us for high school students. Instead we all go to college or find jobs using the degrees we already have. Sometimes we open a store or two just to give us something to do really or we just stay at home and avoid the human population all together." I'm trying to make sure I am as honest as I can possible so she sees I'm not trying to hide anything from her.
"How old where you when you were turned?" I don't feel like she's going to run out of questions anytime soon.
"I was 26," I didn't need to elaborate that one.
"Why do you come to my house every day after school and help me with my homework?" Damn I was hoping she would forget about those questions.
"Because I know Alice or Edward would help you with your homework every day and I want to help you maintain your grades." No point in lying seeing as how I am working on building trust between us.
"How would you know that?"
"Alice told me," This is probably going to lead us back to one of her earlier questions.
"Is she the one that you've talked too since they left?" She has a really good memory I'll give her that, and she's asking really good questions.
"Yes she is."
"Am I usually your topic of choice when she calls?" I can hear anger in her voice and a deep sadness in her eyes. It breaks my undead heart.
I honestly don't quite know how to answer that question. While yes we do talk about her, nothing bad of course, we mostly talk about when and how I'm going to tell her about all of Edward's lies. Since they just left less than a month ago I feel like it's too soon to tell her anything about why I showed up when I did. "We do talk about you yes, but nothing bad I promise." I hope that is a sufficient enough answer.
"Okay," She says as she turns to face the television.
"Wait, okay? Is that all you're going to say?" Well that was not what I was expecting at all. I don't know if that's a good thing or not.
"In all the time I've known Alice she never does anything without a reason. So if she calls you and I am your topic of choice then there must be a real reason behind it. So far you haven't give me a reason not to trust you so I'm going to leave that alone for now. Oh and you took a while to answer which means that you are trying to find a way to tell me the truth without lying to me which I appreciate. Edward never had a problem lying, omitting things, or completely ignoring what I said." She looks sad when she says his name, but I can see that she is slowly starting to be okay with everything that has happened.
"I promised myself I would never lie to you and I plan to keep that promise."
"I appreciate that." Bella says barely above a whisper as she looks off into the distance. I can tell she has a lot on her mind that she either isn't sure about or doesn't know what to say. Either way she'll walk when she's ready.
"Well if you don't have any more questions for today would you like to watch a movie?"
"Sure," was all she said as she goes back into deep thought. I wish she would vocalize her thoughts, but I'll wait until she's ready.
Bella's P.O.V.
I feel bad for interrogating Tanya the way I did earlier, and she was so nice about it which makes me feel worse. The fact that she answered all of them says a lot. We spend the rest of the afternoon watching movies or whatever else came on TV, but I wasn't really paying attention. I'm still confused by the way I feel about her and the fact that I've still been receiving random text isn't helping me at all. I look at my phone as it buzzes notifying me of a text. Speak of the devil and they shall appear.
Are you still confused about Tanya?
Why is she the topic of choice every time?
Why do you answer a question with a question every time?
It is still too early for Tanya to show up since Charlie is still awake. They haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet, but I'm thinking that they should.
Because I am nothing if not consistent.
I'm simply trying to help you figure some things out.
You sound like my best friend who moved away about a month ago. Always trying to help whether I ask for it or not.
Maybe she was always so willing because you don't know how to ask. She sounds like a good friend.
I had a feeling you would say something like that.
Sooooo Tanya?
What about her?
Do you like her?
Something about this is off. Usually they are never this direct and to the point. They sometimes ask how my day is and other things before they try getting into the whole Tanya topic.
Yes I like her we are friends after all.
We both know that's not what I meant.
You know my name but I don't know yours still. Why is that?
You never asked.
Touché. So what's your name and why are you so interested in Tanya and I?
If you think about it you know who I am. I've never tried to keep it a secret. Also you and Tanya need to have a talk because Edward lied to you.
So far you have not answered any of my questions and in turn created more. What do you mean Edward lied to me?
Haven't you noticed how Tanya never avoids answering your questions and she never just ignores what you say. I'm sure if you ask her she will be more than happy to answer.
You suck.
Well, all this person has managed to do is confuse me to no end, and now I doubt everything I thought I knew about Edward. And what do they mean Tanya would be more than happy to answer? Does she know something I clearly don't?
I'm sorry, but I have to go now. Goodnight Bella.
I don't bother responding because now all I can think about what I'm going to say to Tanya when she gets here. I want answers and apparently she has them. Maybe she knows why I feel so connected to her. In these past few weeks I have gotten over the original shock of having feelings for her I am just still confused as to what these feelings are exactly.
As I spend more time with Tanya I notice I miss the Cullen's less. It doesn't hurt to hear their names and along the way I don't know when but whenever I hear Edward's name all I feel is hatred. I feel it burn and tighten my chest. It's all his fault I lost my family and for that I will never be able to forgive him for that. So now I hear that he has lied to me and Tanya knows exactly what about. I can't wait to hear it. I'm sure it will just add fuel to my fire.
I look up as I hear somebody crawling through my window. I doesn't take me long to realize that it's not Tanya.
"Hello Bella," Carmen says as she walks over to me and pulls me into a hug.
"Hi," I whisper trying not to blush. Carmen since we met has always been very motherly towards me. "Where is Tanya?" I ask worried that she's not coming tonight.
"She sent me to come pick you up. You're spending the night with us."
"Oh, umm okay." I say as I gather some clothes to wear tomorrow since I've already in my pajamas. I also make sure to go to the bathroom to grab my brush and anything else I might need. Carmen is still waiting for me in my room when I get back.
"Are you ready to go sweetheart?" I've truly missed having a mom around. When the Cullen's left I thought I had lost the only mother I ever truly had, but she was easily replaced by Carmen. I can't help but smile as I think about that.
"Ready when you are." I say as I watch her close my window and grab my hand as she leads me out of the room. I don't even need to ask her what she's doing before she answers.
"I don't want to risk you getting hurt if we leave out of your window." She says as we reach the front door. I can't help but smile again. None of the Cullen's cared about me getting hurt when they used to sometimes get me out of the house.
"Thank you." Carmen gently squeezes me hand as we walk out the front door and I watch her turn around to lock it. I didn't even notice her grab my keys.
Carmen doesn't say anything as she gently picks me up and slowly, for a vampire at least, takes off towards what I believe to be their house. Hopefully Tanya is there and willing to answer my questions because right now I have too many to swirling around in my head.
A/N 2: I'm sorry if you don't think this is the best chapter. Which I must admit it's not to me, but I've been very off this week since my friend is coming down to my area to get her test to see if she has cancer. I'm praying she doesn't. Anyway I now have the story set up perfectly for how I want it to go now so the chapters should really start following. Anyway until next time!
