AN: Sorry for the delay! Summer and all that… Next chapter is almost ready to go so it won't be too long until the next one. Enjoy!

Tara POV

It had been nearly two weeks since Mrs. Woodley's accident and things weren't getting much better. Adam's mom would be in county jail until she went to trial and there was no telling how long it would take to actually get a court date. Gemma had arranged for the club lawyer to represent her, but Mrs. Woodley had declined, instead choosing to take her chances with some shitty public defender that couldn't give a shit less about her.

In her infinite wisdom, Mrs. Woodley had also refused to grant John and Gemma permission to take in Adam. I don't know what the fuck she was thinking. I know she hated them, but did she really think some foster care bullshit was a better choice for her son? I guess the answer was, of course she didn't. She just let her bitterness overshadow her judgement and held on to her resentment like a lifesaver, to the disservice of her own flesh and blood.

Of course, Adam hadn't taken it lying down. He had begged her, pleaded with her. When that didn't work, he argued with her, threatened to disown her. When that hadn't worked, he finally decided to let go. It was the only thing left for him to do. He kept up with her case through her lawyer, but aside from that, he gave up. After all the years of holding on to the hope that she might wake up from her disillusionment, he finally realized that the mom he remembered, the mom who packed him lunches and bought him his first dirt bike, that mom was gone… forever.

But the drama hadn't stopped there. Ms. Blackmon had thought she could actually get Adam to stay with a court appointed foster family. I guess she had banked on him being uneducated on the way the system worked. After hours and hours of research, I'd discovered that all he had to do was claim he was exercising his right to leave home and, because of his age, there'd be nothing they could do about it. Foster families could only do so much under the eyes of the state. I guess Child Services just had to make a show of things, act like they were trying to get involved and help without actually doing anything. They were just checking an item off a to-do list. They couldn't keep him there.

All that said, things were still awful. After bailing on the foster family, Adam had bounced around for a few days avoiding state mandated welfare checks before Gemma practically tied him down and forced him to stay at her house. That lasted only a few days before the tension with Jax had boiled over and Adam went back to his house. I never got a full explanation of what happened, but it was enough that the Teller house was absolutely out of the question in Adam's eyes.

So there we lay, twisted in bedsheets in an empty house, staring at the ceiling in Adam's room, passing a joint back and forth.

I shifted my weight, curling in closer to him. He absently smoothed my hair back, away from my face.

"I'm glad you're here," he told me, no emotion in his voice.

I glanced over at him, but he was still staring at the ceiling.

"I'm glad you finally let me," I responded. I tried to keep the emotion from my voice, but it was hard. Adam had been distant and I knew I couldn't blame him but it wasn't easy playing the role of the supportive, understanding girlfriend. I wanted to be there for him. I wanted him to reach out. He hadn't really been up for seeing anyone since it happened and, as much as I didn't want to let it bother me, it did. This feeling of being unwanted was too painfully familiar to me.

I felt Adam shrug against me. "I'm sorry, T. I don't want to upset you. I just need to figure some shit out. I don't want my shit to bleed all over you."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "But it is," I managed to whisper.

He hugged me closer to him. "I know," he sighed.

"You know I'm here for you; whatever you need. I know you're going through some shit. I get it. I understand. I don't like letting people help me deal with my shit either. Just... don't disappear on me, okay?"

Now he was looking at me. "I won't, T. I promise. I just gotta figure my shit out. What am I gonna do?" he asked. The pain echoing in his words clutched at my heart.

"Why can't you stay with John and Gemma, just for a little while? They'll let you save what you make at the cages. You can save enough for a deposit, get an efficiency. I can help. I can pick up a babysitting gig or something. I can pitch in.

He moved so both arms were wrapped around me. "You're too much, T. I can't ask you to do that."

"You're not asking. I'm offering."

"Same thing. I'm not gonna let you do that."

"Well then at least stay with them for a little bit, just so you can figure things out-".

"You know I can't do that," he interrupted.

"Sure you can. Gemma is driving me nuts asking about you. She'd love to have you there."

"You know that's not what I mean. You and Jax…" he started.

"Adam-"

"No, Tara. The two of you…I don't know how it was between you guys. I don't know shit about the two of you back then. But I know how it is now. And how it is now? Shit, that's all anyone needs to know to understand however it was then. He loves you."

"Adam, no-"

"And you love him."

"Adam, stop it. Why are you doing this? I'm not in love with Jax and he's not in love with me. We're history; ancient fucking history. Adam. I'm with you. When I'm with someone, I'm with them. 100%. How do you not understand this about me by now? What ever happened before doesn't matter. This matters." I told him, pointing between the two of us.

"But T, it does matter." He whispered, lacing his fingers between mine. "It matters because that's why I can't stay with them. Just because it's ancient history to you doesn't mean it is to him. We barely tolerate each other as it is. How do you think it's gonna be living there, 24/7, you and me in front of him, day in day out?"

"First of all, it's not going to bother him. I told you, we're past all that shit. And second, who cares if he did have a problem with it? Gemma and John asked you to stay, he's gonna have to deal with it."

"Come on, T. You know it doesn't work like that. It's his home as much as theirs. That's only gonna end badly, and you know it."

I wanted to argue with him, convince him he was wrong. But buried beneath all the bullshit I used to barricade the truth, I knew he was right. Whatever peace he and Jax had made was only for my sake and there were no guarantees that the mutual understanding would stay in place forever, especially in close quarters.

"So what are you going to do?" I asked in a small voice.

He kissed the crown of my head and breathed in. "I don't know, T. I've got no plans. I'm just gonna lay here like this and see what comes my way."

XOXOXOX

Jax POV

The guys and I had taken to hanging out at my house since dad had pretty much banished us from the club house after mine and Adam's little altercation. Mom had been pissed but the pitying face she made when she'd seen me was ten times worse than any temper she could have unleashed. Part of me wished she didn't sense how deep things with Tara went for me. Even if she was my mom, it felt too personal for someone else to know; a tiny truth I wanted to keep to myself. But it was also the only reason she had cut me any slack; a blessing and a curse, I suppose.

She had a soft spot for Tara too; probably the only girl mom had ever cared about honestly. I think she saw what I saw; Tara had the whole world against her but she was still a fighter. She didn't want pity; she didn't want to ask for help. She didn't even really want to acknowledge anything was wrong. She buried her truths in the graveyard of her soul and, somehow, mom seemed proud of her for that. I had a feeling, if mom had ever wanted a little girl, she probably would've conjured up someone like Tara, without even knowing her.

Ryan's phone went off next to me and I reached over to toss it to him and saw Tara's name flash across the screen. Well, it actually said ROCKY, but that's beside the point.

I tossed it across the room to him and he answered it. I don't know why I expected him to look surprised, they were friends after all. The imaginary lines that had been drawn across the group after mine and Adam's fight were invisible to Ryan and Tara knew that. He was probably the only one of us she felt comfortable calling.

I dragged my hand down my face. Adam's words echoed in my brain, 'are you ever gonna let it go?' It seemed like the answer was a resounding 'no'. Shit, she could be half way across the country and I'd probably still think about her crazy ass every day. I don't know what she'd done to me, but it was starting to feel irreversible.

Ryan hung up and started gathering his shit.

"Where are you going?" Opie asked.

"Oh, that was Tara," he explained looking sheepishly over at me. "She's out of chronic and asked if I could drop off a half." He paused. "You don't care, right?" he asked me.

I rolled my eyes. "Far be it from me to get between a girl and her weed," I told him offhandedly.

He still looked unsure.

"Dude, it's cool," I assured him. "I didn't get in a fight with her."

Ryan laughed. "Shit, you should be glad too. She would've actually done some damage to that ugly mug of yours."

I shrugged. "I don't hit girls."

"Oh, I think she would've left a mark even if you did… maybe especially if you did," Ryan laughed.

Opie snorted. "What are you, her manager? Booking agent?"

"Shit, I wish! I'd put money on her for sure. Think about it – stick her in the ring against some of those crow eaters?" Ryan shook his head and laughed. "I'd pay to see that."

He did have a point. If it wasn't Tara, it would definitely be entertaining. But knowing what I know, I didn't have the heart to root for that, even if she would most definitely kick some ass and make some money.

"How are you getting over there?" I asked.

Ryan shrugged. "I was just gonna walk. Frankie's not gonna come pick me up just to drive me around."

"Why don't we go with you?" I asked.

Ryan looked at Ope and then back at me. "Yeah, sure man. I think Adam's at work anyway."

"Doesn't matter if he isn't," I told him, a little cockiness seeping into my voice. "It's not like she'd kick us out."

"Alright, bro. It's cool with me," Ryan replied, pulling the straps tighter on his backpack.

I grabbed my Reds and dug out a box of Menthols Tara had left the night we broke into Tiger Tote. Always better to come bearing gifts just in case.