I am really enjoying writing this.
I know some people were really sad after the last chapter.
Yeah... It doesn't get happier here...
Chapter 4- The Moon: New
Tenten had been walking with seventy pounds of clothes and weapons on her back for seven hours now. She left her apartment before the sun rose and departed for Shukuba Town. Her hair was tied up in her usual two buns, though they were a bit unkempt and loose.
She didn't sleep the night before and instead focused on packing everything she didn't want to leave behind, such as some one-of-a-kind blades she owned, and gathering some spare money for shelter and food. After showering and changing into some fresh clothes, a short, light blue kimono and baggy dark blue pants, she heaved her bag on her back and left the village.
Perhaps Tenten should have felt more upset about leaving home, but Konoha hadn't felt like home since she left for the war. Home is were she felt grounded and loved. In the village she felt like she floated through her days and that people could care less about her. They all had their own lives and she had no right to force herself in them.
Especially Neji's.
She shook her head roughly at the thought of him. Tenten had been trying to prove her worth her entire life, she wanted to prove that her merits would not be lessened because of her sex. And yet she succumbed to the one flaw that could be used against her.
A shinobi must never show weakness...
But she wasn't a shinobi any longer, was she, though she was still a woman. Disillusioned, she thought about a poem she heard a woman sing once.
Tenten was only nine, her father had died maybe a week prior, and she walked around the village heartbroken and alone. In front of a bathhouse, a woman sat playing a shamisen sadly. Her face was smeared with heavy make-up and her kimono was soiled and threadbare.
The woman then sang a song so sad and haunting, Tenten knew she'd never forget it.
Hana no iro wa.
Utsurinikeri na
itazura ni
wa ga mi yo ni furu
nagame seshi ma ni
It was then Tenten decided she would never be like that woman. She would overcome whatever adversaries she faced and be strong. She would be remembered; a name kept alive in history.
The song came back to her as she walked through the gates of Konoha. "A life in vain," Tenten murmured, "My looks, talents faded like these cherry blossoms paling in the endless rains that I gaze out upon, alone."
The road to Shukuba was quiet,with only a few people passing her by. She walked with an old man for a while, who offered her a ride on his cart until they reached a fork in the road. He planned on selling spices in an entirely different country, and gave Tenten the most disapproving look when she told him she was going to Shukuba.
She arrived when it was nearly noon and immediately hated the city. As soon as she walked through the gates she was nearly run down by a man carrying a rich couple in his cart, groped by drunken men and women that lingered on the side of the road and mugged by a twelve year old who cried when she twisted his arm behind his back.
Konoha was a large village, with its fair share of annoying city-dwellers, but it was nothing like this city. It smelled like alcohol and cigars and the only sound in the air was the ringing of slot machines. Prostitutes lined the streets dressed like geishas and street vendors argued with their customers.
After scouting the city, Tenten decided on a quiet inn far away from the main activity in the city. It wasn't too expensive, clean, and relatively close to the Shukuba Kabuki Theater.
She settled in her room and unpacked, her mind frazzled. She'd left home so abruptly she didn't plan how she'd contact Takara. It couldn't be as easy as simply walking to the theater and asking to speak with her, could it?
Regardless, Tenten changed her clothes again, to something the didn't stink of a day's sweat. She fixed her hair so her buns were neater and left the inn towards the theater.
She was at the entrance after a few minutes. Tenten gazed about the large gathering hall in slight awe. Draperies of red silk hung from the rafters and the wall were adorned with painting of the theater's most famous performances. It was beautiful architecture with simple, but equally lovely decor.
"What are you doing in here?"
Tenten turned at the shrill voice behind her and locked eyes with young woman with golden blond hair dressed in a fancy red kimono.
"Excuse me," Tenten bowed politely, "I don't mean to intrude." The woman scowled. "Well you are. The next performance isn't for five months, you know. Our actors need complete privacy from the public."
"I'm not trying to disrupt you," Tenten assured. "I only wanted to speak with Takara."
The woman gave her a blank look then chuckled and finally broke into sputtering, mocking laughter. "What makes you think that you can just request to speak with our leading actress? She is rehearsing, first of all. Second of all, I'm sure she has no interest in talking to you."
Tenten frowned and felt her jaw clench. But she didn't get too annoyed. She was a shinobi, and trained to sneak into fortified palaces. She could get past this rude woman.
"You don't seem to understand. I'm from Konoha." Tenten watched the woman's face brighten with satisfaction . "I've traveled here to persuade your troupe to come perform in our village."
The woman approached her with a warm, schmoozing smile. "Oh, please excuse me. I didn't know you were an agent. Most of the agents were get are men. Let me see if she is in her dressing room. I'll be back soon."
Once she was out of earshot, Tenten couldn't help but laugh. She didn't think the lie would work so easily. She assumed the woman would have her speak to the director, and she'd meet Takara through him. Really, what kind of agent talked to a performer about taking a show to a village and not the director or owner of the troupe.
Tenten waited patiently for several minutes and collected her thoughts. She had decided while she walked to the theater to be as kind and calm as possible despite how uncomfortable this meeting may be. Her stomach was in knots, so she used structured breathing to calm down.
As she inhaled, she had a huge urge to raise her arms and slowly pose, as she used to do after she sparred. Her father told her that he was taught the slow movements when he was young, as he was highly temperamental, the poses helped him relax. Instead she closed her eyes and imagined she was in a field somewhere, decompressing after intensive training. It was memory-like and comforting.
"Your breathing is too shallow," Neji's voice told her. In her mind they were young again. They'd just met, in fact. "I know how to breath," she had retorted. "Fixing your posture will make your breathing less rapid," he said coldly. "Well, you focus too hard on your breathing. Relax, why don't you?" she spat back.
"Being lax leads to forgetfulness, and I cannot afford to forget," he said, so gloomily that it surprised her that someone so young was in such abject despair. "You can't afford to forget what?" she asked, despite herself.
In reality though, she was still in the theater, and the blond was speaking to her."Takara would be delighted to speak with you," the blond told her. Tenten shook out of her reverie and gave her a professional smile. "Thank you. Where can I find her?"
"Takara is in her dressing room on the third floor. There are stairs down the hall that lead backstage. Take the stair up and find the door at the end of the hall with her name on it. I'd take you myself, but I have some things to attend to."
Tenten nodded. "I think I can remember," she lied. Of course she'd remember, but the less attention she could draw to herself the better.
The blond tottered off then, the heels of her sandals echoing in the hall.
Tenten departed for the dressing rooms, the halls strangely empty, despite that the troupe was already rehearsing for their next performance. She climbed three steep stories and walked down a long hall, names of the actors on each of the doors. At the very end of the hall there was a room with double doors and Takara's name gilded on the doors in gold.
She stared at the closed doors for a while, her heart in her throat.
I can do this, she thought. But part of her felt like running. The same part of her that wanted to stay in Konoha. The same part that wished she'd stayed with Neji the night before.
Tenten hated that part of herself. It was the side of her that wanted her to surrender herself to her deepest emotions, feelings she had long since thrown away in her quest to become the best kunoichi she could be.
A shinobi must never show weakness...
And despite not being a shinobi any longer, she held onto that rule. It was the only thing motivating her to knock on the door.
So she did.
End of Part 1: The Moon.
Next Chapter:
Part 2, Chapter 5- The Star: Red
A life in vain.
My looks, talents faded
like these cherry blossoms
paling in the endless rains
that I gaze out upon, alone.
Yeah, this completely ironic poem was written by one of the Six Poetic Geniuses of Japan, Ono no Komachi.
I would highly recommend reading more of her poems if you can find them.
See you guys in part 2!
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