Here it is friends, enjoy. I'll talk more about my life in the past week on the bottom. Haha.
It's a bit emotional, and Rocky... I like how I wrote him in this. Calum as well.
Read on! Happy St. Patrick's Day and... I own nothing.
Except for my love of drummers, omg. Ratliff is a cutie with his facial hair ;)
Enjoy.
Rydel stared at the big clock ticking in front of her. Her leg was swinging back and forth as she had one crossed over the other and she just silently sat on the couch, waiting, waiting, waiting.
More than anything she wanted to get up and leave.
But she couldn't.
She had made a promise to Ratliff (and herself, most importantly and mainly for herself) that she'd get through this. If Ross could do it, she could too.
At least that's what she kept telling herself.
The door dark wooden door opened and she looked up to see a fairly young woman came out of it, she gave her a warm smile.
"Are you Rydel Lynch?"
She had to give the woman credit. At least she hadn't immediately recognized who she was.
She nodded, "yeah that's me." She stood up and smoothed out her dress.
"Are you by yourself?"
She nodded again, "yeah, I wanted to come.. um, alone. I'm over eighteen so I didn't think that would be a problem."
The woman shook her head, holding out her hand, "not at all, I'm Dr. Jamie Moon. But you can just call me Jamie."
"Moon. Huh, that's the name of my brother's-nevermind." Rydel stopped herself from continuing that sentence. She didn't want to draw attention to who she was or who her brother was quite yet. After all, she had just met the woman, who knew if she was going to keep seeing her. Jamie led her all the way to the end of the hall, and then into a room. She softly closed the door behind her and Rydel spun around. She uneasily looked around and then noticed, yet another couch, over on the other side of the room, by the wall.
"Please, take a seat, get comfortable."
Rydel did as she suggested and then it was silent.
"Okay, Rydel," Jamie said as she took out a pad of paper and then a pen. She positioned herself so that she could focus on her and then she smiled at her again. "Tell me about yourself."
"Um, okay, my name is Rydel. Obviously, I'm um, twenty years old and I live in Northridge." She shrugged and didn't say anything more.
"Is your first name-"
"Like the high school in Grease, yes. It is," Rydel finished for her, then she realized she just interrupted the psychologist and quickly covered her mouth with her hands, "I'm so sorry. I didn't meant to."
"It's okay, don''t worry about it."
Rydel nodded, "I um, I don't know what else you want me to say," She admitted, looking down at her bright teal fingernails. "I'm just, this whole talking thing is kind of new to me."
Jamie looked up, "and why's that?"
"I'm not normally much of a talker and I know that is and sounds so bad, but I've never talked much to begin with, about anything. It wasn't until last night when I finally opened up to my boyfriend that I realized it wouldn't be so hard, but it is and I don't know where you want me to start or what you want me to say." She was rambling and internally rolled her eyes at herself.
"How about we just start with simple questions and you answer what you want to okay?"
That was fair, she supposed.
"Okay." Rydel answered quietly.
"You mentioned your name, your age and where you live, but tell me more."
"Like what?"
"Your birthday, where are you from? From here in California? Tell me about your family," Rydel tensed at the world family and Jamie took notice of it and wrote it down. "Or, tell me about your boyfriend, hobbies, interests, anything you'd like to start with, go ahead and do it, when you're ready."
Rydel took a deep breath and closed her eyes, "okay, well, um… my birthday is August 9th, I was born in 1993, I was born and raised in Colorado, but I moved out here five or six years ago, I have four brothers, one older and three younger. I have an amazing boyfriend who's very… just amazing. He's good friends with my brothers and I and I don't know, he's just amazing and I'm lucky to be with him. He's very sweet and he really loves and cares about me, I can see it whenever we're together and I feel the same way. I could go on and on about him, by the way." Jamie laughed and she paused for a moment, collecting her thoughts, "I have a lot of hobbies, I play the piano, I write songs with my brothers sometimes and I dance, I love to dance, that's probably my most favorite hobby of all. I also sing and um, yeah." She wasn't about to give away the fact that she was in a band with her brothers and her boyfriend away so easily just yet. This woman didn't recognize her, she didn't want to give her a reason to fangirl or whatever it was older women did. Plus, she also wasn't very comfortable with that fact that she was saying as much as she was about her personal life to a complete stranger.
It was silent as Jamie nodded and wrote down a few things.
"Your mother, she was the one who set up this appointment right?" Rydel nodded, "she said that you had some unresolved issues that you had to deal with and talk about." Rydel nodded again. "Well, since this is the first session, I won't make you speak about it quite yet."
Rydel let out a sigh of relief.
But then, she thought of something.
"You're not going to tell anyone anything I tell you right?"
Jamie shook her head, "not without your permission, the only time I will is if what you tell me is either harmful to yourself or to other people. Other than that, our sessions are very confidential."
Rydel just gave her a nod back and realized that she was doing a lot of that.
"Okay," She finally answered.
"So," Jamie put her pad down beside her and then casually leaned back. "We've still got forty minutes, what do you want to talk about?"
"I don't really want to talk about anything, honestly."
"Well, you're here for a reason aren't you?"
"Yeah, my mother told me to come here and then my boyfriend encouraged me to come as well, because I told him… a lot of things that happened in the um, past and I just feel a bit overwhelmed right now."
"That's pretty normal," Jamie nodded, "but you do know that if you want help and the proper treatment, you have to talk, right?"
"I'm aware."
"Okay, so why don't you tell me what you're hiding."
Rydel looked at her, surprised, "I'm not hiding anything." Her hand reached onto her neck and she started to play with the band's guitar pick that she, Ratliff and Ross, especially, always kept around their neck. Jamie leaned forward a bit and looked at it.
"What's it say on your necklace?"
Rydel looked down, "it's says R5."
"I've heard of them, are you a fan?"
Yeah, she wasn't sure if the therapist was playing a game and actually knew who she was or if she was just genuinely curious. It was confusing the hell out of her.
"No, I'm in it. I play the keyboard and sing."
Jamie smiled, "I know."
"Wait, what?"
"I knew who you were the moment I saw your name on my appointment list. I have a ten year old daughter."
"Oh, okay." Rydel wasn't really sure how to answer to that.
"So, now that we have that out of the way and you know what you say to me is going to be completely confidential, why don't you really tell me about what's on your mind?"
Rydel shrugged, "I don't really know you."
"Fair enough. Then, we'll just get the introductions out of the way and then when you feel comfortable enough, you can tell me anything you want, okay? How's that sound?"
"That sounds okay." Rydel answered and then let out the big sigh of relief she hadn't known she was holding. She could do this, she knew she could.
"Draw four, whaaat?" Laura put the card down and then Ross smirked at her, rolling his eyes as he drew four cards and then held them up to his face. He adorably looked at her over the cards and she did the same, both of them bursting into laughter when the door to his room opened and before he could blink he was immediately hugged tight by his mother.
"Hey, mom…" He said hugging her back.
She pulled away, wiping underneath her eyes and Ross saw that she'd been crying. He instantly felt really bad. "I tried to come earlier, as soon as I got the news last night, actually, but the dumb stuff wouldn't let me through since visiting hours were over."
"But you're my mother," Ross looked at her confused, "don't they make exceptions for that?"
She shook her head, "apparently since you're over eighteen, it doesn't matter." She put her hand on his cheek, "how are you feeling?" She asked and then before he could say anything, she turned to see Laura was sitting on the other side of the bed and immediately Stormie went over to her, giving her a tight hug. "How are you as well? And the baby?"
"We're both fine," Laura answered, "he's not doing too much and I'm okay."
She looked up at her and Stormie gasped, "what happened to your cheek?"
"Um…" Laura stalled, looking at Ross who just shook his head.
"It was me, I slapped her," He said, guiltily and looked down at the cards in his hands. "I didn't mean to though, I swear."
"Oh, Ross…" Stormie said, "I know you didn't mean it-"
"It was during his episode, he thought I was… um, Mark." Laura told them both and Ross looked up at her, "Did you know that touching your shoulder when your back is turned is a trigger? Did your father ever do that?"
He nodded, "yeah, he did it a few times and the once before he hit me and started talking shit."
Laura nodded, "well, that explains a lot then."
"You know I didn't mean it right? I wouldn't ever hit you, not ever. I-"
"Ross!" Laura got up and put both her hands on his cheeks, she leaned her forehead against his, "I know you didn't mean it, why do you think I'm still here? I'm not going to ever leave okay? I promise. But you have to promise me you'll take your medication now, no matter what."
"Is this why you had an episode?" Stormie asked him and Laura moved away from him, "you didn't take your medication?"
"Isn't it always the reason?"
Stormie knew better than to berate him considering he really did feel badly about what he'd done to Laura and for not taking his medication so she did the same thing she always did when he had his episodes, she just hugged him and held him tight, rocking him back and forth.
And like always, tough guys Ross, hugged her back, clutching onto his mother's shirt like he was three years old again and afraid of being dropped. He hid his face in her shoulder and just sat there. Then, after a few moments, he held his arm out to Laura who immediately sat closer to him and he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tight as Stormie moved away from him.
"It's okay, Ross, it's okay." She whispered, "it's all over now, you're okay."
After about five minutes, he seemed to pull away from her and she just looked at him.
"How's Riley?" He asked.
"He's-" She felt it then, something in her stomach. She gasped and put her hand over her stomach and then she felt the same flutter again, but she realized it wasn't really a flutter. She tearfully looked up at Ross.
"What?" He asked, "are you okay? What's-"
She grabbed his hand and put it on her stomach, then she smiled, "wait a second," She whispered.
It happened again and Ross looked up at Laura, before putting his other hand on her stomach.
"What's going on? Ross? Laura?" Stormie's voice cut through their thoughts.
"The baby-" Laura breathed as she felt it again and the smile on Ross' face grew wider, "he's kicking."
Ross suddenly pressed his lips against hers and she giggled, the baby kicked again.
"Oh no," Ross groaned, pulling away from her a bit.
"What?"
"Riley's going to be just like Rocky and Vanessa," He told her and she smiled at the thought.
"He probably knew you had kissed me too." She teased and then pressed her lips gently against his. He kicked again and she laughed. Ross laughed with her and then they broke apart, Laura asking Stormie if she wanted to feel Riley's kick soon afterwards.
"Hey, Rocky, you okay?" Ratliff asked, taking a seat on the couch beside him. Rocky, who had just been staring at the television blankly, slowly turned his head to face him.
"Yeah, fine," He answered, "I'm gonna chill with Vanessa any minute though, she's coming over."
"Oh yeah?" Ratliff asked him and he nodded. "How's that going?"
Rocky shrugged, "we kissed once like two weeks ago, so we're still kind of at the same place we were two weeks ago."
Ratliff studied him, noticing that he seemed a bit distracted, almost emotionless. Totally the opposite of how Rocky usually was.
"Hey, dude, if you want to talk at all, about anything, I'm always around," Ratliff told him, putting his hand on his shoulder and Rocky gave him a small, soft smile.
"Yeah, thanks bro. Same goes for you." Rocky answered, just as the bell rang. He stood up to go answer it and was greeted by a smiling Vanessa. She immediately walked through the door, "uh, hey?"
"Hi," She smiled at him and then reached up, giving him a chaste kiss on the cheek, "where is everyone?"
"Uh, Ryland's upstairs, I think, Ross doesn't live here," Vanessa gave him a look, he shrugged in response, "um, Riker's out with Brooke, mom's visiting Ross and Rydel's out," Rocky answered, he looked behind him. "But Ratliff's in the other room."
Vanessa nodded, "okay, well, I just got off the phone with Laura, who called me screaming, well, not really screaming because then she might do something to harm the baby, I don't know though because I'm not on expert on pregnancies and babies-"
"You know you have a habit of rambling just like Laura does, I just noticed that." Rocky commented.
"That's because we're sisters you dork," Vanessa answered back, "anyway, she was super excited."
"Oh yeah? Why's that?" Ratliff asked, joining their conversation and giving her a quick hug, "hey V."
"Hey," She smiled back at him and then looked at Rocky, "you better call Ryland down, this is some pretty big news."
Ratliff motioned with his hand in between Rocky and Vanessa, "you're not like pregnant too are you?"
Rocky smacked him upside the head, "dude! She just said Laura called her with big news."
"Yeah, one, ow, two I missed that part," Ratliff answered, glaring at Rocky and rubbing the back of his head.
"Ryland! Get your ass down here!" Rocky called up the stairs.
"Oh yeah, that's really nice of you," Ratliff shook his head. Rocky just rolled his eyes and Ryland hurried down the stairs.
"What is it?" He asked.
"Vanessa has news for us, I assume it's regarding Laura and Ross," Rocky answered, he gave Vanessa a nod, "proceed."
"Thanks, anyway, guys, Laura just called to tell me she felt the baby kick for the first time." She smiled wide and then Ratliff's mouth dropped open, Ryland's eyes widened and Rocky smiled. Though, she noticed his smile didnt quite reach his ears like it normally did. She made a mental note to talk to him about that later on. "She also told me that when Ross kissed her, Riley kicked her and interrupted them, so she's about ninety-eight percent certain he's going to end up like Rocky and I in the interrupting thing, but anyway, how cool is that?" She squealed.
"That's amazing!" Ratliff answered her.
"Yeah, wow…" Ryland nodded, "I can't believe it."
"Since we grew up playing hockey, do you think he's going to as well? Or is he going to play soccer?" Rocky wondered out loud.
"Well, Laura and I grew up playing soccer, so you never know." Vanessa answered.
Rocky and Ryland shared a look, "we gotta teach that kid how to play ice hockey." Rocky replied.
"Or, he could play both sports, just throwing that out there," Ratliff said as the front door opened and Rydel walked in. She noticed that everyone was crowded around in the living room.
"What's going on?" She asked, giving Ratliff a quick kiss as his arm wrapped around her.
"Vanessa just told us some awesome news," Ryland answered, "Riley's going to be an ice hockey star," He discreetly high-fived Rocky as Vanessa shook her head and then Rydel gave her a hug.
"Laura called me and told me Riley kicked for the first time today."
"No way," Rydel gasped, "oh my god, that's amazing."
"She said they tried calling you, but your phone was off." Vanessa looked at her confused, "it's never off, why was it off?"
"Oh, um…" Rydel looked at Ratliff, before looking at Vanessa again, "I was um, I went to my first therapy session today and I couldn't have my phone on," She explained.
"How did it go?"
Rydel shrugged, "it was okay, I thought the therapist didn't recognize who i was at first, but then she did and had me talk a bit about myself. She was definitely something though." Her eyes lit up, "oh! And get this, her last name is Moon. I can't wait to tell Ross."
"That is a crazy coincidence," Rocky commented.
"Tell me about it," Rydel muttered, "anyway, it was nice seeing you Vanessa and thank you for telling me the amazing news, because really, it is amazing, but I haven't seen my boyfriend all morning, so if you'll excuse us…" She winked at her pulling Ratliff with her and Vanessa giggled.
"Go have fun, but uh, not too much fun. We've already got a baby on the way!" Rocky called after them and Rydel waved her hand in the air in response while Ratliff just gave him the finger.
"Yeah, I'm just gonna go upstairs and… I got nothing, see ya!" Ryland waved at them and then Rocky and Vanessa were left alone.
"So, what do you want to do?" Vanessa asked him, she smiled, her hands held up as if she was presenting herself to him, "I'm yours all day."
Rocky looked deep in thought for a moment, before he stopped closer to her and put his hands on her waist, "all mine?"
She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck, "all day and night."
He grinned, "awesome." Then his smile went away and he blinked, moving away from her he sat down on the couch.
"What's wrong?" Vanessa asked, sitting down beside him. "Is everything okay?"
He looked at her, "honestly?" She nodded, "not really."
"What happened?" She asked, her voice gentle. She looked down at his hand and put hers on top of his. He held it tight and then leaned his head against hers.
"Ross had an episode last night, a bad one. Like, a really bad one."
"Is he okay?" Vanessa asked.
"Yeah, he's fine, he's at the hospital right now. But I was the one who took him and he was just…" He trailed off, his voice breaking as tears formed in his eyes. "He wasn't himself, you know? It was like he was a completely different person and I couldn't get him back. No matter what I did, I couldn't bring my brother back." The sound of his voice broke Vanessa's heart and she hugged him.
"It's okay," She whispered, holding him tighter. He pulled away from her and she saw that he had tears still in his eyes. "He's back now right? That's what's most important?"
He nodded. She could tell he didn't want to talk about it any further, so she gently pushed him until he was on his back, then she lay her head on his chest and took his hand in hers, holding it tight.
"Get some rest." She told him, "when you're feeling well rested and better, we'll go see Ross and you can talk to him, because I think that's what you need to do, you need to talk to him." Rocky silently nodded again and she reached up, giving him a soft and gentle kiss before smiling at him and laying her head on his chest again. "I'm not going anywhere," She promised, staring ahead and blinking here eyes. "I'm here for you."
Ross was so bored.
Laura had left to go back home and take a shower.
His mom had gone home to make sure everyone else was okay.
He had pretty much played about ten games of UNO by himself. Something he hadn't even known was possible until he tried it.
His hospital bracelet and the IV were causing his skin to itch.
He couldn't sleep, at all.
And to make things worse, there was absolutely nothing on TV.
He kept switching channels, waiting for something, anything to catch his interest when he found an old episode of Austin&Ally. It was from the first season, when Austin had tried to help Ally gain recognition. He smiled at the memories of filming the episode. It had been one of his favorites.
The door to his room opened, but he paid no mind to it. He was so into what he was watching he hadn't noticed the three people who had entered the room.
"Great memories huh?" He heard and looked to his left to see Raini, Calum and Laura were all there. His eyes lit up and he smiled.
"Hey guys," He said and then to Raini, "to answer your question, yes. Good, amazing memories."
She smiled and then gave him a hug, though once she pulled away from it, he saw the tears in her eyes. Calum hugged him too, but to his surprise, his hug was tighter, more meaningful.
Laura just sat down on the bed beside him and took his hand in hers, linking their fingers together.
"We're so glad to see you're okay," Raini smiled at him, tears slipping down her cheeks. "I, I mean, we…" She gestured to herself and Calum, "were so worried when we found out what happened."
Ross looked at Laura's still bruised cheek, a wave of guilt sweeping over all over his body. "I don't even remember what happened, that's the worst part."
Calum sighed, sitting down on Ross' bed right beside him. Raini moved closer to where Laura was and silently, the three of them watched the episode Ross had been previously watching together for a few minutes.
When it was time for a commercial break, Calum was the first to speak, "why did you feel so helpless?"
Ross had never heard anyone ask him that before, or use that word, specifically to describe how he felt. Helpless. It was fitting, it was perfect.
"I didn't want to feel sick anymore." He finally answered, not breaking eye contact with him. "I hate knowing that I'm sick, that I'm going to be, for that rest of my life."
"It's hard, I get it, but it's something you can control." Calum told him, "and I'm not lecturing you to give you a hard time or to be a big brother or whatever, but I'm just saying this as one of your best friends." He paused and Ross nodded, both Laura and Raini staring at him intently, all of them ignoring that the show had come back on. "You scared the shit out of me," He finally said, his tone conveying his emotions as it was a bit shaky. For the first time ever, since any one them had met, they saw tears in Calum's eyes. He was the tough one, the one that never cried (next to Ross, of course), never got angry or emotional. He was just Calum, the happy go lucky guy that everyone knew and loved. But this, what happened to Ross, was something that everyone in the room, could see had affected him deeply. "When I got the call about what happened, it scared me. I thought you were going to die or that you had tried to kill yourself and it made my heart want to explode. Not in the good way, but you get it. I couldn't sleep and I couldn't eat, not until I could see for myself that you were okay." Ross nodded, his eyes filling with tears as he just silently acknowledged Calum's words. Then, without warning, Calum just hugged him again, holding him close as Ross hugged him back. "I can't lose you, man. You're the closest I've got to a real and legit bromance." Everyone laughed softly at that, including Calum, he pulled away from the hug. "The next time you feel helpless or like you can't do this on your own, I don't care what you have to do to remind yourself, call me. I'll come right over and if I'm in Canada, I'll fucking walk over if I have to, if not take the next flight over here. I'm serious, okay? I don't want to lose you and I'm pretty sure everyone in your life that loves you feels the same way."
Ross nodded, "I love you too, Calum." He answered, his voice emotional. "Thanks."
Calum nodded and then smiled, "who else am I going to pull pranks with on Raini and Laura during filming? Or take random hikes or coffee runs and confuse the shit out of random strangers?"
Ross laughed at that, "that's a pretty fun game we play, dude."
"Sorry, but um, what game?" Laura asked.
"When we go out together, we get a lot of questions, like are you Austin and Dez? Or Calum and Ross? And we like to mess with them, tell them we aren't who they think we are and then right after their convinced, we apologize and take pictures with them and sign shit so it makes them pretty happy," Calum explained.
"I'll never understand you two, you both are definitely strange." Raini commented and everyone laughed.
"Guys," Ross looked at his costars, his best friends, his extended family. "I'm sorry I scared you, I didn't mean to feel so…helpless, and I just want you to know that I love all of you."
"We love you too, Ross," Raini assured him, squeezing his hand.
It was silent, then, "we still teaching Riley how to become a prank master?" Calum asked and Laura's mouth dropped open.
"Hell yeah bro." Ross fist bumped him and then with a roll of Laura's eyes and a giggle from Raini, they all gave each other a big group hug.
"Aw, that's cute." They broke apart to see Rocky and Vanessa were standing in the entrance to the room. Vanessa was smiling and Rocky was looking at the intently. She stepped forward, "you guys are really the most adorable cast I've ever seen."
"Thanks," Laura smiled at her sister.
"You okay?" Rocky asked Calum and Raini who nodded. Raini sniffled and Calum wiped underneath his eyes.
"We've got to go," Raini looked apologetic, "but I'll come back and visit you tomorrow."
Ross nodded and she gave him a hug, before Calum did the same.
"I'll probably see you in a couple of hours," He said and Ross laughed. "I'm going to dominate you in UNO."
"You're on," Ross told him and with that, Raini and Calum left, leaving behind the two sets of siblings. Rocky had his hands in the pocket of his hoodie and was staring at the ground.
"Um, Vanessa, do you maybe want to go get something to eat with me in the cafeteria?" Laura asked, sensing that Rocky wanted to have a talk with Ross alone.
Vanessa nodded, "absolutely, we'll be back." She put her hand on Rocky's shoulder and reached on her tippy-toes to kiss his cheek.
Ross and Laura exchanged a smile and with that Laura got up, leaving with her sister as Rocky slowly walked over to Ross' bedside and sat down beside him.
It was silent for a few moments as they watched another Austin&Ally episode.
"So how are you feeling?" Rocky asked him.
Ross shrugged, "I feel like I fucked up big time and now have all this unwanted attention on me."
"You sort of asked for it you know, by not taking your medication, I mean."
Ross shrugged. "I didn't ask for this damn illness."
"No," Rocky agreed, "you didn't, but you have it. And there's nothing you can do, but either make it worse or make it better."
Ross didn't say anything.
Rocky just stood up, walking to the door when he paused and turned to face Ross. "We should talk."
"You looked like you were about to leave," Ross answered, "are you mad at me?"
"No, I'm not," He answered, "I'm worried."
"Well, don't be. The doctor's gave me a new medication and-"
"Ross, come on." Rocky shook his head, going back over to him as Ross sat up and looked at him. He put his hand to his head, almost as if in disbelief. "You're acting so indifferent about this."
"I'm not acting-"
"You have no idea what happened last night, none at all, and you have the fucking guts to say that you wished people would stop giving you attention?" Rocky demanded, "you brought that on yourself, you chose to not take your medication. You knew what was going to happen, it's not like it hasn't happened before."
"Why are you attacking me?" Ross snapped, "you're acting like Rydel did when this happened when it was just her and I."
"This has happened with Rydel?" Rocky demanded, "what the fuck is going on with this family? First dad and all the shit he does and now you and you're apparent inability to take your damn medication. Oh and let's not forget what happened on tour when you didn't or when you were in Puerto Rico. I'm sure after the first two times you'd learn what to do by now."
Ross was annoyed he couldn't get in Rocky's face. The damn IV stuck in his arm was preventing him from doing anything.
"You know what? You tell me what it's like being bipolar and get back to me." He snapped, almost yelling at him. "Until then, don't talk about things you don't understand!"
"Do you have any idea what I went through with you last night?" Rocky yelled at him. "Do you? No! You don't!"
Ross was silent. Rocky was never emotional. Like Calum, he was the happy go lucky guy. He never cried and rarely ever got angry. He was usually the calm, comic relief.
Rocky started to breathe heavier, his eyes filling with tears as he brought his hands up to his face and ran them down, looking away.
"Rocky," Ross managed to say after a few moments, "what happened last night?"
"I'm sure you've been filled on everything that happened before you and I left for the hospital," Rocky said, in a much calmer voice. "Well, after we left, you started to fight me, you thought I was dad and kept trying to get me to let go of you. You started calling me names, said things like, 'I'll never turn out like you, everyone hates your fucking guts' and then you pushed me to the ground and put your hands in your hair. You let out this crazy, animalistic scream that if it wasn't for me being there probably would've landed you in a mental hospital." He paused and Ross just stared at him in disbelief. "You almost hit me, but I got out of the way before you could, then as soon as I got you to the hospital, you seemed to snap back into reality because you realized what happened with Laura and started to fight me again, by saying that you had to get to her and apologize to her because you didn't want to lose her. You said she and Riley were what were most important to you and if you lost them both, you were going to kill yourself. You even picked up a needle that you had somehow gotten ahold of, I'm still not sure how, to be honest and you threatened to do it. You were convinced Laura was going to leave you and you just kept threatening to kill yourself over and over. I couldn't stop you. It was like you were gone and I couldnt bring you back. No matter what I said or what I did, it was like you were forever gone and for a few minutes there I thought it was true." He paused, the tears in his eyes finally over flowing and going down his cheeks. "I couldn't help you and it hurt that me, your older brother, really couldn't help you this time." He paused again, looking down at his feet, before lifting his head up. "They had to sedate you, because you were going crazy. The look in your eyes, was almost murderous, you even hit one of the nurses and the doctor because you weren't thinking straight, they had sedated you after all that, so you slowly started to calm down and you fell against me and I just sunk to the ground with you, holding you tight, almost like I didn't want to let you go. I cried, Ross, for the first time in a long ass time, I cried like I had just lost my favorite teddy bear or some shit. I had to let you go, but I sure as hell didn't want to."
"Rocky," Ross's voice cracked, the tears in his eyes spilling over and they just stared at each other for a few moments.
"I can't lose you Ross and last night I was so scared it was going to happen," Rocky was full on crying and Ross closed his eyes, letting his head hang as he cried with him. Then, Rocky had gone over to him and hugged him so close and so tight, Ross was almost unable to breathe. "I love you, Ross, I love the fuck out of you and if anything were to happen to you, I don't know what I'd do. You're the best brother anyone could ask for, honest and… we need you here, Rydel, Ratliff, mom, Ryland, Riker, Laura, Raini, Calum, Maia, Riley, Austin, Vanessa and I. I need you okay? Please, dude, don't ever feel like you're alone, because you aren't."
Ross just nodded and hugged his brother tighter.
"Don't let dad's words get to you, you're nothing like him. You never will be." Rocky said quietly.
Ross nodded again as Rocky pulled away and looked at him. "I know that now, thanks." He smiled at him and Rocky smiled back.
And for the first time in his life, Ross had seen Rocky cry like a baby losing his favorite blanket.
"I love you, Rocky." Ross told him.
"I love you too," Rocky said hugging him again, he cried into his shoulder.
After a few moments, they broke the hug and wiped under their eyes, just as the door opened and Vanessa and Laura walked back inside, they had a huge smile on their faces.
"What's up?" Rocky asked.
Vanessa looked at Rocky, "are you okay?" She went over to him, putting her hand on his shoulder and he nodded, hugging her tight.
"I'm much better."
"And you?" Laura asked Ross, "how are you feeling?" She got on the bed beside him and lay down. He put his arm around her.
He shared a look with Rocky and then looked at Laura, playing with her fingers, "I'm okay." He answered, "I feel good, I feel… I feel infinite."
Laura smiled and kissed his cheek.
"So, what were you two happy about?" Rocky asked.
The sisters exchanged a look, knowing that whatever had just gone on in the room minutes before, would probably just stay in the room. Other than a few words about it, the bond that Rocky and Ross now shared, would probably never break. And though Laura wanted to know what happened, she knew it was good for them, Ross especially.
Laura felt a kick and then grinned at him, "I was just telling Vanessa about how Ross and I had kissed earlier and Riley decided to kick me and interrupted us." She motioned for him to come closer and he hesitantly put his hand over her stomach, before Laura just grabbed it and put it on for him. "It's okay, but just wait a second." She whispered and he nodded. Then, he felt it. The kick. He grinned.
"So he interrupted you two huh?" He asked.
"Yup," Ross muttered.
He shared a smile with Vanessa, "he takes after his aunt and uncle. How cute is that."
"Yeah, that's exactly what we need," Ross muttered again, "another Rocky, Vanessa's not so bad." He teased and Rocky shook his head, playfully shoving him. Ross stuck his tongue out and Rocky just rolled his eyes.
Laura giggled and then settled down, laying her head on Ross's chest, "So you two are watching some Austin&Ally?"
"Yeah, fetus Ross and Laura, where it all started," Rocky answered, he looked at his brother and at his brother's girlfriend. He put an arm around Vanessa and she smiled up at him. "Where the best celebrity story of all time started, pretty damn cool if you ask me."
"Yeah," Ross agreed, he smiled at Laura, "you're right. It is pretty damn cool."
Ross wrapped his arms tightly around Laura as she lay on top of him, her head on his shoulder, her fingers lightly tapping his arms as he put his cheek on top of her head.
"What are you thinking?" She asked him, her voice quiet. She lifted her head so that she could see him, her hands on his chest, her chin on top of her hands. He shrugged.
"I'm not thinking of much right now, except that I'm happy you're here," His eyes looked around the room, "in this ugly hospital room."
It was silent after that, with Ross deep in thought again and Laura thinking about a few things herself.
"What color should we paint Riley's room?" Ross asked after a few more seconds of silence and Laura's eyes went to his. "I'd say a combination of our favorite colors, but let's be honest… orange is not really the most amazing color out there."
She giggled, "it's a pretty nice color, just not my favorite."
"I like to eat them," Ross teased and she laughed. "Let's brainstorm some ideas, we could… we could paint it yellow."
"That's your favorite color, smart one."
"We're not painting it red that's too… strip club for me."
Laura raised an eyebrow, "yeah? And when have you been in a strip club? I've been with you practically every minute since we met, excluding when we were at home and when you were on your six month tour…" She trailed off, her eyes blinked and her mouth dropped open slightly, "oh my god, you went to a strip club on tour!"
Ross gave her a look, "really? No, relax. I've never been to a strip club before. I've just seen movies, you know those things they have where people see things that aren't normal in real life?"
"Some are." She said quietly.
"True." He shrugged, a smile then spread across his face, "you know Rocky said when I turned eighteen, he, Ratliff, Riker and I were going to go to a strip club?"
"Yeah? And did you?"
He gave her that same look and she giggled, "no, obviously not."
"Do you want to someday?"
Ross shook his head, "I don't have to go to a strip club. I'm good." He grinned and she smiled back, then his eyes lit up.
"What?" She asked him, amused.
"I thought of the perfect color for Riley's room."
"I'm listening…"
"Green."
Laura's head snapped to him, "I mean, green is both Ratliff and Rocky's favorite color, at least some sort of green and they both helped me a lot. Ratliff with my dad's fucked up secret and Rocky last night." His tone held emotion and Laura just felt her heart fill up with a lot of warmth towards him.
She leaned up and softly and gently pressed her lips against his, she smiled and nodded, "green it is. Green's the color we'll paint Riley's room." He smiled against her mouth and then kissed her again, wrapping his arms around her waist.
"I really wanna flip you over right now," He said into her ear, "but I can't so… pretend I did and giggle." That statement alone actually made her laugh and cupping his face in her hands, she just gave him a deep and passionate kiss.
They continued to kiss, Ross making her giggle in between them, by poking her or gently biting on her lip or doing some random Ross thing, when the door opened.
"Ahem," They heard and broke apart to see a nurse was standing in the door way. "Sorry to interrupt, but you, mister, need to take your medication."
Ross nodded, "okay, but just one thing before I do that." The nurse raised her eyebrow and Laura just looked at him. He leaned in and quickly kissed her, then smiled. "Okay, ready now."
Laura just shook her head and smiled as the nurse handed him a plastic cup of water and a few pills. He took them and after the nurse checked to make sure he really had taken them and left, Laura lay her head back onto Ross' chest, lying on her side, since now with her pregnant belly, it was getting harder to stay on top of him without moving to his side anyway. He had on arm around her, his fingers in her hair, he gently tugged on it.
"Back to that?" She asked, not looking up at him. She could sense he was smiling as he tugged on her hair again. "You are such a preschooler."
"I can't help it that I love to cuddle and tug on your amazing hair," He answered back, giving her another tug. "Don't lie, you know you're a fan of it."
"Sadly, it's the truth." She sighed and then looked up at Ross. "Promise me, no matter what, you'll always be your goofy lovable self."
He smiled sadly, resting his chin on the top of her head, "I promise." He whispered and then tugged her hair again causing to giggle, which made him smile in return.
"This is a sad movie," Rocky commented, adjusting his legs so that they were more comfortably on the coffee table, Vanessa's head on his chest as he just played with her hair.
"You're right it is," Vanessa agreed, "very, very sad."
"Why did we pick this one?"
She shrugged, "it was there and I heard it was good…" She trailed off and looked over Rocky to see both Rydel and Ratliff staring them with looks of… well, they couldn't really name it. It was basically a 'what the fuck is wrong with you two' face.
"Guys," Ratliff said, "we're watching The Lion King."
"It's a sad movie, okay?" Rocky pouted and Rydel rolled her eyes at her younger brother.
"Glad to see you're back to well, that isn't really what we call normal." Rydel said to him and he just playfully pushed her, causing her to laugh.
"The Lion King is a great movie, don't diss Simba and his ability to be fucking awesome." Rocky defended and Ratliff nodded, holding his hand up Rocky somehow managed to high-five him.
"We are dating two very strange people," Vanessa commented.
Rydel's eyes lit up, "oh my god, you two are dating! Did you hear that? They're dating! Since when? How? Who? Don't answer that, but answer the other three."
"Since like a second ago," Rocky scoffed and then received a playful smack from Vanessa. "I mean it's not official yet or anything."
"Better," Vanessa smiled at him.
He just smiled back at her.
"Is that what we look like?" Rydel whispered to Ratliff and he nodded, leaning in closer to her.
"I think so, but remember, no one's as bad as Ross and Laura."
"True," Rydel agreed.
"What the hell are you four watching and why?" Another voice was added into atmosphere of the room and they all looked to see Riker was standing in the entrance way next to a girl nobody recognized.
"It's the Lion King," Rocky began.
"I know that."
"And it's amazing." He finished, he stared straight ahead, "it's Ross' favorite movie." He added.
"Yeah," Rydel nodded, "that's true." She smiled over at him and he smiled back at her, an understanding passing in between them.
"So, who's the lovely lady standing next to you?" Ratliff asked Riker.
Riker grinned, "this is Brooke, Brooke, these crazy people you see sitting in front of you are my brother, Rocky, my sister, Rydel, some dude I know named Ratliff and awesome sauce, Vanessa."
"Ratliff," Rydel narrowed her eyes at Riker who just smiled at her, "is my boyfriend and a part of our band. So's Rocky."
"You're missing a member aren't you?" She asked, looking confused.
"Yeah, Ross… he's uh, he's not here," Rocky answered. "He's also our brother and then you have Ryland, who's probably upstairs getting laid or something."
"Maybe you two should go interrupt him." Riker smiled over at Rocky and Vanessa.
"Nah that only works with Ross and Laura," Vanessa shot back, her eyes focusing again on the movie.
"Um, do you have a bathroom I could-I mean of course you have a bathroom, what home doesn't? But I was wondering if I could possibly use it and where it is?" Brooke awkwardly asked and Riker nodded, he led her to where she needed to go and then came back, sitting down beside Ratliff. Rocky paused the movie and raised an eyebrow at him.
"She's been dying to meet you guys," Riker said. "So, try not to embarrass me okay?"
Rocky and Rydel shared a look, their mouths dropped open, "embarrass you? Us?" Rocky pointed at himself and Rydel. "Why would we do such a thing?"
Riker just shook his head and Ratliff playfully pushed him over.
"Really, the one you should be worried about is Ross." Rydel said, "not us," She added, her finger going in between herself and Rocky.
"Yeah, not even Ryland's that bad." Rocky agreed.
Riker just rolled his eyes and blushed. "You guys are definitely something." He said.
"And guess what big bro? You have the pleasure of having us for siblings so you should feel honored." Rocky said and Riker just laughed.
"Feeling better?" Vanessa asked Rocky as he walked her to her car. He had his hands in his jacket and nodded.
"Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better, actually." He smiled at her and she smiled back, "thank you."
"It was no problem, really." She said and he stepped closer to her. His hand went up to her cheek and he cupped it, leaning in closer to her, he softly pressed his lips against hers.
"Goodnight."
She smiled, then kissed him again, "goodnight." She whispered and then with that, broke away from him and got into her car. She started it and Rocky rolled down the window.
"Don't forget to text me when you're home," He winked at her and she smiled.
"I won't." With that, she backed out of the spot and Rocky watched her leave, before going inside and once again, joining Ratliff and Rydel on the couch. The movie had long since been over and they had all talked for a bit, before Vanessa said she had an early call time the next day and had to leave.
"So, how was it?" Rocky asked Rydel and she looked at him confused. "I mean, therapy." He amended.
"It was… definitely something. I'm going back in two days."
"You are?" He asked and she nodded, "why the change of heart? I could have sworn you against it not even a day ago."
She shrugged, "If Ross can go through what he did and still come out okay, then I think I can too."
Rocky smiled at her, "that is pretty amazing."
She nodded and smiled back, laying her head on his shoulder. He hugged her from the side and then the three of them sat there in a comfortable silence for a few moments.
"So where's Riker?" Rocky asked.
"Upstairs, I probably wouldn't go up to your room for a while," Ratliff said, but then he grinned, "actually do what you want to do."
"I'm not a total cockblock." Rocky defended.
Rydel lifted her head and gave him a look.
"Yeah, alright, good point." He stuck his tongue out at his sister and then squeezed her shoulder before getting up. "I'm not gonna be a third wheel here so I'm gonna go see if Ryland wants to play video games or something. Peace out."
He messed up Rydel's hair on his way out of the room and she just laughed, throwing a pillow at his back before settling back into her spot with her head on Ratliff's chest and a smile on her face.
So I just wanted to say that the episode I mentioned in this chapter is my second favorite after the episode with Austin and Ally trying to get to know each other better. That was the first one I ever saw, but the one when he tries to help her get recognition, so funny, so cute. So amazing.
Also, I'm like eight episodes behind haha. I haven't seen it since the first season three episode, I just barely finished the one with them imagining life if they hadn't met Austin, but he was there, sort of, so it confused me a lot. They did meet him, they just didnt create a friendship or whatever with him. I don't know. It was a confusing one for me. If you want to explain it to me, that'd be awesome :)
I just started watching Bates Motel and holy crap wow, is it amazing. The acting in it is just.. amazing, Freddie Highmore could not have been casted more perfectly for the role and yeah. I've never seen Psycho, but this show. I'm addicted to it. So good. Watch if you don't, and if you do watch it, watch it again, haha. Just kidding. Or am I? Dun, dun, dun... I'm super hyper right now if you couldn't tell.
I do realize though that Rydel, Ratliff, Ryland especially and Riker haven't gone to visit Ross at the hospital yet. Don't worry, they will in the next one. Major Rydel/Ross talk coming up in it and it's gonna be a good talk. Very good.
So uh, yeah. That's my life. In the last week I mean. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and... thanks for all your amazing reviews on the last chapter. I worked hard on it and I'm glad I got such a positive response from it. You guys rule.
Much love xx
