Sunlight peeked through Natasha's eyelids, beckoning her to wake up. Slowly the feeling of her limbs came into focus and she uncurled herself from Bucky. Careful not to wake the blonde sleepy soundly beside her, she climbed down from the top bunk of Phishie's bunk bed and stretched.

What time is it?

Taking her phone from the charger, she looked at the screen. 10:21. Not bad for a summer day she guessed. Putting the cellular device in her pocket, she made her way to the kitchen.

There was nothing better than a hot cup of coffee in the morning... however Phishie didn't have a coffee maker. So instead, Nat took a sprite from the mini fridge and a hot pocket from the freezer.

"The breakfast of champions" Nat laughed to herself about the familiar phrase used by her friends. See, whenever the gang was at Phishie's house they tended to eat a lot of junk food which also included breakfast. The Breakfast of Champions was any junk food they ended up eating when they were at Phish's house. They were champions after all.

Looking over at the couch it seemed her "EDM artist equivalent" was still heavily passed out on the couch. The Mau5 was all sprawled out, limbs hanging off, blankets on the floor and was that... was that drool? Natasha walked over to get a better look. Yep, that was definitely drool. Gross.

Watching him snore, Natasha was her equivalent such an idiot? (because you are one...?). Nevermind the fact he had flown all the way to Texas from Canada, he had broken into the house. It's a felony called breaking and entering? It's pretty simple the title is literally how you do it. You break something, and enter. In this case, Joel had broken the garage door and entered Phishie's house. And all of this because he was worried about his friend... it was cute, really.

The problem was what had happened when he got here. Now he had to deal with being a father. Sonny had taken the role of motherhood like a phish to water... well the idea of it anyway. The goblin had a long way to go before he was actually motherly. But if Joel was anything like her, (as her 'mini Deadmau5' status claimed) it was going to be a lot harder. In her past, little kids actually used to scar the crap out of Natasha. Yet, every little child she had ever met adored her. It had taken a long time for her to adjust to them and eventually consider having her own someday. She guessed if she warmed up to them that meant there was hope for Joel too. Well, hopefully.

She was broken out of her thoughts by a groan.

"I need coffee."

Below her, Joel begin to stir just a bit but refused to open his eyes, knowing the bombardment of light that would be coming his way if he did.

"Hate to break it to you, but Phish doesn't have a coffee maker."

The Mau5 peeked a squinted eye at her. "What kind of household doesn't have a coffee machine?"

"The phishie kind?" Natasha smiled stupidly at her own joke.

Joel groaned. "Fuck!"

Natasha wasn't sure if his out burst was due to her lame pun or the lack of coffee... probably both.

"You could make a coffee run. There's a Starbucks nearby."

"Ehhh, I don't have the camera with me."

Natasha rolled her eyes. "I didn't mean that kind of coffee run. Besides I don't think Sonny wants to be in the same car as you right now anyways."

Joel sighed at the reminder of the recent hiccup in the relationship with his best friend."He's still mad at me, eh?"

"I hope that's rhetorical," Natasha said, making her way to the kitchen. "Not only is the answer obvious, you know him better than I do."

Deciding to make popcorn because why the hell not, Natasha put a bag in the microwave to pop. Above the constant pop of exploding kernels, she heard Joel exclaim.

"Owsla!"

Natasha turned at the sound of Joel's voice. There he sat, open mouthed at a certain blue alien teenager. Owsla had completed yet another stage of growth overnight.

But currently she had an angry pout on her adorable lips.

"Dad."

"What the fuck happened to you?"

"Joel!"

"I mean! Like... you're a teenager now!"

Owsla rolled her eyes like the reason was so obvious. "Yeah Dad, it's the unshrinkafication process."

"The what what? I didn't know about this!"

"Mom knew, and maybe if you weren't..." Owsla paused as she tried to come up with the right word. She decided to follow her Mother's example. "Weren't 'such an asshole' you would know too!"

Joel just gaped at the moody teen as she quoted Sonny. It was safe to say she had no idea what her words meant but still.

Hiding a smile, Natasha got out some cereal. "You want some breakfast Owsla?"

"Uh.. Sure.."

Natasha just grinned at the entire situation. She knew she had just been feeling sympathy for her EDM equivalent but she couldn't help giving him a hard time.

"You aren't very involved in your daughter's life are you?"

"I got here like 12 hours ago!"

"Wow," Natasha continued. "And you've been asleep for most of them. Shows how much you care."

"Yeah Mom was up all night working, what were you doing Dad?"

"Okay, first of all," Joel moved to stand at the opposite end of the island across from Owsla. "Never mind the fact that I was on a plane for six hours yesterday, Sonny is not your Mother, he's too irresponsible and I'm not your father either."

"If you're not my father, you can't make my life decisions!" Owsla fired back.

"But I'm the responsible adult here!" Joel pointed out.

The teenager shouted back at him in retaliation. "That's why you're my father!"

"But I'm not!"

Owsla's face fell, a crestfallen, hurt, puppy face on her features. "But Dad... You and mom love each other, right? That's why I'm the child created from your love for each other."

Joel starred at her stupefied sputtering as he tried to cover up his shocked blush. "Don't say unnecessary things like that!"

"Unnecessary? As in it's obvious?" Natasha muttered, snickering to herself as she retrieved her popcorn from the microwave. With it, she watched the drama before her unfold like a movie.

"Forget it! I don't even understand why I would want you to be my dad! You couldn't be a good dad even if you tried!"

That sentence set off the inevitable shouting match between the two of them as they slowly leaned towards each other, yelling.

"I could be a great dad if I wanted!"

"Prove it!"

"Maybe I will!"

"Then you're my dad!"

"Okay, I am!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Daughter and father starred at each other breathing heavily from their shouting match. Owsla snapped out of it first, leaning back to smile with a curious look on her face.

"Is this the type of special relationship between fathers and daughters? I've never done this with Mom before."

Natasha looked at Owsla with a grimace at what her twisted sense of daddy daughter bonding was now. This having a child thing would definitely be a slow process for Joel... Emphasis on the slow part by the look on the poor artist's face.

When Joel finally straightened up from leaning across the table, he was blinking rapidly trying to process the words that had come out of his mouth. "Okay, I am!" He let out a groan as he ran his hands down his face frustratedly. His damn mouth and competitive nature had gotten in yet another mau5 hole.

"Alright alright, we all just woke up and its just too early to be shouting." Natasha grabbed some cereal for Owsla and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, escorting her to the table. "Here's some breakfast, though I'd suggest letting it soak in the milk a bit, it's better that way."

"Morning gu- woah... Owsla?"

"Good Morning Phishie!" the newly grown teenager at her breakfast table smiled at her brightly.

Phishie walked into the kitchen peering at the alien curiously. When her gaze shifted to Natasha, the semi-red head shook her hands.

"I am NOT the alien expert."

"She's a teenager?"

"Yes." Nat nodded in affirmation.

"Okay then." With that, Phish went to grab a poptart from the pantry. Meanwhile, Joel decided to stop banging his head against the table. Languishly, he sunk into s chair across from Owsla, starring suspiciously at the child who had made him- no CONNED him into being a f... fa... faaa... fath... He couldn't say it. This just shouldn't be happening. How the hell was this happening? Tiredly he bit into a poptart as he tried to make sense of it all.

The sound of shuffling socks interrupted his inner monologue. Soon the goblin appeared, rubbing his face tiredly. The tell tale sign of a late night were apparent by the dark circles under his eyes. He yawned loudly as he stretched. Joel instinctively knew he had stayed up all night working on a new single.

"Dude, put some pants on."

Sonny looked down at himself. He had his usual black t-shirt on and a pair of red plaid boxers along with his socks. "I have boxers on..."

"There is nothing but girls in this house man."

"Says the man who refused to wear a towel." Sonny grumbled.

"I'm lesbian, Phish is asexual, and Bucky is his sister. I don't think it matters that much... unless you're getting off on it Joel." Natasha smiled oh-so innocently.

"What! No!"

"Do you have orange juice?" Sonny asked.

"Yeah, in the fridge."

Grabbing the orange juice he unscrewed the cap and began searching for a cup. Then he turned around and immediately dropped the whole thing. "Owsla!"

"Sonny!" Phishie exclaimed, the orange juice spilling everywhere.

But the raven haired man just ignored her as he walked towards Owsla. Bumping into the island, he proceeded to get on it, walk across it, walk onto the table and jump down right next to Owsla's chair. Grabbing her, he hugged his child fiercely, starting to cry.

"Whyyyy! I told you to stay small forever!"

"I'm sorrryyy!"

"One day you wake up and your kid is all grown up and teenagery and soon you'll be older than me!"

"Don't worry Mom, I'll try to be a strong, independent woman like you." Only Natasha caught sight of her rolling her eyes

"Soon you'll be married and leaving me!"

"Moooom! You're embarrassing me!" Owsla looked away blushing.

Joel's eyes widened as he watched the two of them. "Married? No boys till you're legal. We don't want lawsuits."

Sonny looked at his best friend. "Oh Joel, don't be so harsh... just tell any suitors your mama has the resources to dispose of their dead body and get away with it." and the big smile he had when he said it made it all just as creepy as you're thinking.

"She could be into girls, like me, you know." Natasha pointed out.

"Are you hitting on my daughter!"

"What? No I'm just saying she could be-"

"I'll show you!" with that, he got ip to chase Natasha.

Immediately Natasha got up and ran. Now, Sonny was a black belt, but he usually forgot that when he needed the skills (which was how he got that scar across his chest but that's a story for another day). So usually Natasha wouldn't bother with the short man's threats... but Owsla seemed to bring an unusual protective side of him, so she decided not to risk it.

"Sonny! Cut it out! Stop chasing me goblin!" she yelled at him as she was chased around the table.

"Oh my god! Mom, stop!" Owsla, the poor teen, buried her face in her arms, embarrassed beyond belief.

But no one was willing to stop it so Sonny chased her around the table intill they finally came to a stand still. Natasha debated what to do intill she found an escape route through the kitchen. If Sonny followed her between the table and island, it might just buy her enough time to run down the hallway and barricade herself in one of the bedrooms. She was an expert at playing the door-game with her brother and Sonny didn't weigh that much so he had less body weight to throw around to his advantage. Then again, he also had the option of continuing on his side of the island. If he did, he would surely catch her at the refrigerator. But knowing her plan was the only way to end this endless charade, it was just a risk she would have to take.

She took off. And like a final piece of a jigsaw puzzle, she could see her picture of freedom coming together as he followed after her on the preferred route. What she hadn't accounted for in her plan however, was the fact Phish was cleaning up Sonny's orange juice spill from earlier.

Not only was her poor friend in the way, the floor was still covered in slippery liquid. Luckily for Natasha, her assassin reflexes and years of dance came in handy. Without a second thought, she easily lept over the danger zone, avoiding a massive collusion, and landed safety on the other side.

Everything seemed clear for the path of freedom, intill she remembered the 5' 4" man behind her. And this man didn't have assassin reflexes or years of dance experiences. Nope, he was just a fumbley goblin and so the unavoidable collusion commenced.

"Look out!" Phishie cried out in warning.

But it was already too late. With socks on his feet and a slippery, half cleaned, he never stood a chance. So, without much pre-amble, he found himself falling face first into a puddle of orange juice.

The room was oddly silent intill Sonny tried to get up, just to fall again, slipping on the wet floor. The gang burst into laughter as they saw his face, orange juice coming down in rivets. Natasha was laughing particularly hard as she stood above him, admiring her (however accidental) work.

Sonny glared at her from below. "Shut up."

"Hey, you're the one who spilled it in the first place and then didn't clean it up. It's a suitable punishment..." and while Natasha really tried to stop herself, she couldn't help her one liner that came out of her mouth next. "But hey, although you're on your knees, the height difference isn't that noticeable."

Sonny gaped at the tall red head above him. "Why! You! Little!"

"Who you calling little?"

Finally Joel took pity on -his daughter- who was dying of embarrassment due to continued shenanigans of her mother. So, before the hoodlums could go at it again, he called out to his best friend.

"Sonny, come here he commanded."

"B...but!"

Playing the rank card, Joel looked over with a cold stare, repeating himself in an authoritative tone. "Over here, now."

And like a good little goblin, he flopped down in the chair next to Joel, a pouty puppy look on his features.

With all this commotion going on, the racket had finally gotten loud enough to wake Bucky up. She finally decided to get up and come into the kitchen... only to immediately turn back around to go back to bed.

"I don't even want to know." she said, walking back down the hallway.

"Wait, Bucky! Aren't you hungry?" her girlfriend called after her.

"Not hungry enough to deal with whatever that is."

Rolling her eyes, Nat ran after her with a hot pocket, knowing her girlfriend would go hungry if she didn't eat now.

"Here," she held it in front of her. When Bucky hesitated, the semi-red head gave her a stern look. "Eat it."

Deciding she didn't want to get beaten up by her assassin girlfriend so early in the morning, she obediently bit into the other end but making sure to give her a defiant look as she did it. But Nat could care less that her girlfriend was irritated with her. Happy that she was fed, she kissed her on her forehead. Bucky was known for skipping breakfast a lot.

In the kitchen, Phishie had finally finished cleaning up the orange juice spill and Sonny was eating breakfast, trying to ignore the stern looks coming from his best friend beside him.

"Are you going to eat Owsla?" Phishie asked while throwing away the last bit of paper towel she had used to clean up the massive spill.

"Yeah eat up." Sonny agreed, waving his spoon at her. "You know they say breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"I will, I will... as soon as I find the pod goop." Owsla sighed, head resting on her arm.

"You don't have to eat that slimy stuff! Here, try some of this." Sonny encouraged, pushing a spoon of his own cereal towards her. "Look! Here comes the train! Chugga chugga chugga chugga chu, chu!"
"No!" Owsla began to duck the insistent food train. "Mom! I'm two days old anymore!"

"Well at least eat something. Being a moody teenager doesn't mean skipping breakfast." Joel reasoned.

"I'm not that moody dad!" Owsla complained.

"What else do you want me to call it when you refuse to eat?"

"I'm not being moody! It's just I don't know if I can digest human food... I'm only supposed to eat the pod goop."

Phishie cleared her throat awkwardly. "Um... well... we don't have any more of that. The rest of the pod goop was lost when the pod crashed... You already ate the last of it."