Chapter 8: Admitted Feelings
Pharazphel lay in her bed, deep in her thoughts. It was all she could do while she continued to recover. She still felt anger toward Boromir for keeping her trapped in Gondor. She hated it that he kept her a prisoner, away from her country.
However, Pharazphel began to have doubts about herself. Pharazphel groaned as her broken arm gave a twinge. Glancing and grimacing at her wounded arm, she began to wonder if Boromir was right. What if Faramir hadn't been there to stop her? Would she reach Rohan alive? Pharazphel was confident she would have. Yet at the same time, she began to think Boromir was right to keep her.
Pharazphel's mind began to change about Boromir. She felt that she was too hard on him. She knew that he truly didn't mean to keep her from Rohan. Boromir was only trying to do what was right. Pharazphel knew she was being stubborn. She realized that she made a mistake quarreling with Boromir. She was determined to set it right.
That afternoon, Faramir greeted the Houses of Healing. Pharazphel was sitting up in her bed.
Faramir beamed. "My brother did not exaggerate your strength."
"He certainly did not," Pharazphel said, beaming back. "I will admit that much. What brings you here, Faramir?"
"I believe that you know the answer to that," Faramir replied.
"Indeed," Pharazphel replied. "You are here to speak to me about your brother."
Faramir sat by Pharazphel's bed. "I know you do not want to be here. I cannot blame you. I understand your position. Please, try to understand Boromir. He was only doing right by keeping you here. Neither he nor I could bear to imagine what would happen if you left like this."
Pharazphel sighed. "I know. I am only beginning to see it."
"What brought on this change of heart?" Faramir asked in surprise.
"You may be surprised to find that I have plenty of time to think whilst I lay here," Pharazphel said wittily.
"Not surprised at all," Faramir laughed.
"I have thought about Boromir since I arrived here," Pharazphel said pensively. "I know he is an honorable man, as are you. Yesterday, I felt as if he was nothing but a captor. However, I was only lying to myself. I must admit that I have been so blind. I did not realize the goodness that you and him are doing me."
"There is no need to forgive," Faramir said with a smile. "Boromir can be stubborn, I'll admit."
"Well then, that is a trait that we have in common," Pharazphel said with a smile. "We are both too stubborn for our own good."
"Boromir is just like our father," Faramir said. "They are both strong and proud. I only dream of being capable of the great deeds he has accomplished."
"I think you are," Pharazphel said sincerely. "You are one of the most honorable men I have ever known. What makes you doubt your worth?"
"I love my father, but I often doubt if he loves me," Faramir said glumly.
"How could your own father not love you?" Pharazphel asked, puzzled.
"You have not met my father," Faramir said. "Boromir is my father's beloved son. There was a time when my father loved me. Now, I am but a ghost in my father's eyes."
"I do not think that is true," Pharazphel said gently.
"And what makes you so certain?" Faramir asked.
"If a parent does not love their children, they are not parents at all," Pharazphel said simply. "Your father loved you and he loves you still. One day, both of you will see it."
"That is encouraging counsel," Faramir said gratefully. "This is strange that I came to give you counsel and you advise me."
"I suppose that makes us even," Pharazphel laughed.
Meanwhile, Denethor was growing impatient and furious. He had summoned Boromir to the castle for news of Pharazphel.
Boromir entered the chamber and bowed. "What is your bidding, Father?"
"I have heard that you have not yet sent that woman back where she belongs," Denethor said, his lips quivering.
"Father, please," Boromir begged. "Pharazphel still needs rest. She is a guest here."
"She is uninvited and she should go back to her home in Rohan," Denethor said, his voice rising.
"Forgive me, Father, but I will not send Pharazphel away," Boromir said, his voice like stone.
Denethor was stunned. "You have feelings for that wench?"
"Pharazphel is a strong, wise woman, and no wench," Boromir argued. "Why do you scoff at anyone you deem less than me?"
"You did not answer my question," Denethor countered. "Do you have feelings for her?"
"If I were to reply, you would only tell me that they are a fantasy or some spell cast by Pharazphel," Boromir said knowingly.
"I will not have this," Denethor said. "Do you have feelings for that girl or do you not?"
Boromir sighed. "I do and that is why I must not let her go."
Denethor said nothing.
"Forgive me, Father," Boromir said, as he bowed and left the room.
Boromir sighed as he approached the Houses of Healing. He had felt terrible for keeping Pharazphel away from Rohan, even if it was the right thing. He only hoped that she would understand him.
He saw Pharazphel lying in her bed. He took notice that she looked fit for battle, save for her broken arm.
Pharazphel noticed Boromir and raised herself. "Hail, Boromir."
"You look as if you are in good health today, Pharazphel," Boromir said warmly.
"Indeed, I am, except for my arm," Pharazphel said.
"I hope that you have been comfortable," Boromir said.
"I have been. I have been treated well by my hosts," Pharazphel said gratefully.
"I do not wish to be your captor for much longer," Boromir said bitterly.
"You will not be," Pharazphel said, her tone unreadable.
Boromir swallowed and sighed. "I do not mean to be a captor for you. You are only trying to help your country, and I was wrong to call you foolish."
"No, Boromir," Pharazphel said humbly. "After what you and Faramir have done for me, it is I who should be making amends. My love for my mother and my country got the best of me. I was too stubborn to see that you were only doing the right thing. Forgive me. I was wrong to treat you so harshly."
Boromir smiled and placed his hand on Pharazphel's shoulder. "There is nothing to forgive, Pharazphel. We were both too proud to see our faults."
"If there is but one thing my mother did not teach me, it was patience," Pharazphel said lightheartedly.
Boromir laughed. "I can see that your mother taught you well."
"Indeed, she did," Pharazphel replied.
"I hope that you know why I have kept you here, other than what I have stated before," Boromir said earnestly. "I care about you, Pharazphel. I admire your courage and spirit."
"And I you," Pharazphel said solemnly. "You are an honorable, valiant, and kind man. You have my utmost respect."
"I am sorry that I have kept you from Rohan," Boromir said.
"I will reach Rohan and aid my country sooner rather than later," Pharazphel said gently. "I am glad that you brought me here. You taught me a great deal. You have been a wonderful companion."
"I am glad to have met you and been your companion," Boromir said compassionately.
Now that they had admitted their feelings, Boromir and Pharazphel were merry. However, there was a bittersweet feeling for Boromir. In those few weeks since he had met Pharazphel, he had only realized he cared for her. Now that Pharazphel was nearly healed, she'd soon be off to Rohan. Boromir considered this and knew that would be a tragic day.
