January 11, 1991

6:57 pm, Thursday

I went to go see my dad today.

The bus always comes to pick the kids up from school right when the bell rings. Even though I am not eligible to take the bus, according to the school who would rather have a kid walk home alone, the driver likes me and will willingly give me a ride. She passes by my street anyway and usually leaves me in the corner. Today, however, I didn't want to spend an entire afternoon with Eiji after what happened yesterday. I stayed on the bus for a little longer than normal. I gazed out the window, glad that Yuudai wasn't on this bus, when the graveyard caught my eye. I waited for the bus to stop, which it did only a few blocks away, and thanked the lady before getting off.

I shuffled most of the way there. Graveyards were never my favorite place to hang out. The high gates were a bit rusted from years of weathering. My feet crunched under the small layer of snow from last night. A chilly breeze passed, making me snuggle further into my coat. Even though I wasn't as informed in religion as most kids my age should be, by standards, I said a little prayer while walking around. A few of the tombstones were chipping, a few even on the verge of breaking in half. It was sad to see so many forgotten beings gathered in one place. Finally, much to my relief, I found what I was looking for. Far out, beside the barren trees at the end of the yard, was my father's grave. Before, when money wasn't a problem, my mother used a lot of it to make my dad's funeral special. Only close relatives and friends were allowed. She had the stone specially made and engraved, hired cooks to make food for after the ceremony, and even had the graveyard closed to everyone else not invited. It was when she was still mom, and loved me and my dad with all her heart. Now, years later, I stand next to that same stone. I dusted off some of the snow and sat down, not caring if my pants would get wet.

And I just sat.

What else was I to do? My whole life changed after that day, when my father was officially given the right to rest in peace and move on to whatever was out there.

My mother broke. She began to drink, something she hadn't done since her and my father met in college. She drank, again and again, in the morning to until late at night. At first I would be there to comfort her, hold her while she cried out for the man she loved until she eventually cried herself to sleep. Then the violence began. The blaming, the name calling, the pushes, the slaps, the kicks, the punches. Oh, the blaming was the least harmful, physically that is. It would instead leave my younger self broken for many years until I was able to comprehend what was going on. She blamed me for what happened. If I hadn't been sick then dad would be alive. If I wasn't around, and went to school like my mom thought I should, then he wouldn't have been out there. If I wasn't born she could still be with him.

Would my dad be happy with what he saw? Is he watching me right now, shaking his head at how bad things are? Would it be my fault again? Did I not do enough to help mommy? Did I fail both of them? So many questions that I can't have answered until I'm with him. Hopefully, I will find my answers beforehand.

I felt a breeze, but unlike the colder ones on my way here, this one was warmer. Comforting. The breeze seemed to wrap around me, engulfing my body in a warm embrace for a few unforgettable seconds. Before I could even think my body was already reacting to the touch, reaching up to return the warmth. It was gone as soon as it came. With the loneliness of life forgotten at the moment, I got up and walked away from my dad, giving a small goodbye before fully turning away.

I made the journey home with a bit more hope and the comforting feeling of being protected.


Well, that was the next chapter. I wanted to show how much Akihito actually loved his father, and show a bit of how much things have changed for him in just a few years. More will be revealed later on in the story, like how his father died, why his mother blames him, etc. etc. Also, sorry for the slight add in on religion. I thought it sensible to add that he prayed for all of the bodies there, to show that he is caring. I meant no harm and have little knowledge to Japanese religion. Don't look to into that part and go along with it...please...

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you all for the feedback and all of the nice reviews. I read through all of them and love to see how you guys view some of the elements of the story. Feel free to add any insight or if you feel something should be added. A reviewer gave me the advice to keep the setting in Japan instead of starting in America, like some of the earlier readers will know before I rewrote those parts. Doing a bit of research adds to the effect of the story and I don't mind doing it at all.

The next chapter should be out in the next few days. If not tomorrow than Thursday, mostly because my schedule is full on Wednesday. Other than that, have a good one and see you guys soon.