"So, what kind of job do you think Luffy's got?" Zoro attempted at small talk as he leaned back on Sanji's couch.
"I dunno, could be anything with that guy." Sanji mumbled as he stared down at his hands. He'd been doing it ever since they'd finally found the apartments and Zoro was starting to get worried. He was pretty sure he treated them properly… The burn cream should be helping and he didn't wrap it too tightly. Zoro frowned.
"Maybe he's a male stripper." Zoro attempted to make the cook laugh, or fight, or anything. But he was absolutely silent. "Oi!" Sanji continued to stare down at his open palms. "You dumb cook, what's wrong?" Sanji sighed deeply and looked up at Zoro. "Do you need me to take you to the hospital? I thought I'd done an okay job with the first aid but if you need-"
"What am I supposed to do now? I can't fucking cook like this…" Zoro clamped his mouth shut when Sanji spoke. Sanji looked like he wanted to let his face fall into his hands, like most people do when they've been utterly defeated. But he couldn't even do that now or he would just be putting himself through even more pain. "Damnit, I can't even put my hair up in a tie like this!" Zoro frowned but was somewhat relieved. He knew Sanji had a high pain tolerance and if he was complaining about his hands instead of crying over the pain, that meant he was doing fine.
Well, as fine as one could be after burning themselves during a complete mental breakdown.
"Your hair was getting too long anyway. Get it cut." Sanji frowned and looked away.
"Dumbass. Ladies love long hair." Zoro shrugged and got up from where he was sitting, walking around Sanji's small apartment and taking in the surroundings.
Still empty. Zoro's ever present frown deepened and he looked down the hall towards the bathroom. Zoro knew it wasn't his job to make Sanji feel more at home or any shit like that but… Well, if Sanji had something actually decent to come home to, maybe he would stop being such a pain in the ass all the time. Yeah. And if none of the other guys were gonna do it, it would have to fall on Zoro. Maybe he could convince Nami that she should help out the cook and not himself.
But then it wouldn't be the same. Wait what? I don't want to help that shitty bastard! The only reason I wrapped up his hands is because it would be wrong not to. Zoro searched through Sanji's bathroom cupboards until he found a dark green hair tie and snapped it onto his wrist. He also picked up a comb sitting on the sink and left the bathroom.
When he re-entered the living room, he was surprised to see Sanji staring at him wide-eyed.
"What?"
"You found it on the first time… I'm just-" Sanji contorted his face to look as if he were on the verge of tears and placed his hand over his chest so that only the tips of his fingers grazed his loose shirt. "I'm so proud of you."
"OH SHUT UP!" Zoro shouted as his face went red. Why Zoro was even bothering to help this dumbass was a mystery to him. He only ever acted like this when they were alone though. If the two of them were hanging out with the rest of the group, nobody could stop them from fighting. Zoro had wondered on more than one occasion if they were putting on an act in front of people without even knowing it. That theory was debunked pretty quickly after Sanji was leading Zoro home one day and they ended up getting into such an intense fight that they were glaring at each other for a week.
Zoro sighed and walked over to where Sanji was sitting on the couch. Sanji took his hand away from his chest and smirked at Zoro. Zoro continued to glare at the blond and grabbed him by his shoulder, forcing him to turn until he was sitting sideways on the couch.
"Oi! What do you think you're doing asshole?!" Zoro sat himself behind Sanji and whacked him on the head with the brush he'd grabbed. "Bastard! What-" Sanji cut himself off when he felt his brush running through his hair. Zoro smirked at the speechless blond as he slowly dragged the brush through soft locks of blond.
"Damnit cook… if you hadn't fucked your hair up so much during your little freak out, this wouldn't be so fucking hard…" Sanji's entire body seemed to tense up and Zoro wasn't sure whether it was because he just reminded Sanji of his meltdown, or if it was because Zoro was now playing with his hair. Either way, he wasn't struggling, which was a good thing.
"Why are you..? I mean, why-" Sanji attempted to question.
"You were bitchin that you can't put your hair up. I'm just doing this to shut you up."
"You doing it isn't the same as me doing it… you damn caveman…" Zoro was happy to hear Sanji fighting back again rather than sitting and staring at his hands like they were completely gone and not just burned.
"Well it's the best you got right now so suck it up curly."
"How does a Neanderthal like you even know how to do this?" Zoro grunted in response. "Not gonna tell me? Alright, I'm fine to start making assumptions." Zoro rolled his eyes.
"Kuina used to make me put her hair up whenever we sparred together."
"But her hair's so short."
"Well duh, she got a haircut after I started refusing to help her any longer. She could do it fine by herself anyway…" Now that Zoro thought about it, it was probably her way of trying to bond more. Make Zoro feel more like family rather than the random kid that Koshiro picked off the street.
"Oh yeah, by the way… when I saw you at your house on Saturday morning… you had three swords on your belt…" Sanji muttered as Zoro continued to run the brush through Sanji's hair.
"Yeah?"
"Do you use them all at once?" Zoro rolled his eyes as if the answer were obvious.
"Yes, I do."
"How the fuck do you do that?" Zoro chuckled a little. He had this same conversation with everybody that's seen him training before. Luffy was the first one he'd told. He though that Zoro was the coolest guy in the entire SCHOOL! Zoro, of course, didn't care about that kind of stuff, but it still felt kind of nice to hear it from Luffy.
"I put one of them in my mouth." Sanji burst out laughing. Well that was a new reaction.
"Holy shit! SERIOUSLY?! That's fucking hilarious! Just imagining you running around with a sword sticking out of your mouth!" Sanji laughed. Zoro felt a vein throb dangerously in his forehead and was tempted to just rip at Sanji's hair. "That's just too much, you have to show me some time!" Sanji continued to laugh and Zoro allowed himself to smile at the blonds change in attitude.
Sanji's laughter died down after a while and Zoro was able to get most of the nastier tangles out of his hair. How Sanji had mucked his hair up so much was a mystery to him.
"You do realize how incredibly fucking weird this looks, right?" Sanji asked.
"Oh yeah? I hadn't noticed by the way I'm brushing your hair like you're some teenage girl getting her BFF ready for prom." Sanji snorted and turned his head slightly to look at Zoro. "So, if the 'ladies' love long hair, how come you haven't gotten any since you got here?" Sanji smile immediately faded to a sneer and he turned away.
"Obviously because I'm not just looking to 'get some' you caveman! I'm looking for love!" Zoro didn't have to see Sanji's face to know there were hearts in his eyes and that goofy smile plastered on his face. "Women are meant to be treated tenderly and sweetly! Not like just another way to get yourself off!"
"So you're saying that if you were offered sex by the hottest girl in school tomorrow, you would say no?" Zoro heard Sanji practically choke on his own spit and whip his head around fully to glare menacingly at Zoro. Although, the intense blush on his face made the look he was attempting much less fierce.
"OF COURSE! I COULD NEVER TAKE ADVANTAGE OF A LADY LIKE THAT!"
"And if Nami asked you?" Sanji's faced burned even hotter and Zoro had to use all the strength he had inside of himself to keep from laughing. Sanji looked so pissed that there was practically fire in his eyes.
"How could you even suggest that?! She is an angel from the heavens and I would never sully her body in such a disgusting way!" Zoro raised an eyebrow. "I mean, of course I would make sure that the experience would be the most beautiful thing she ever… experienced! But I have no right to be the one that takes her innocence from her!"
"Have you ever actually had a girlfriend?"
"How could you even ask that?! Back in my home country, I was the most amazing and thorough lover in the entire city! I treated every woman I came across as the gift from the heavens that they were and-"
"And you're avoiding the question." Sanji bit his lip.
"So what you bastard?! I don't need to actually be with a woman to admire her beauty!" Zoro decided to drop the pointless conversation as he tied Sanji's hair up in the green elastic. Once he was happy with it, he pulled his hand away and threw the brush next to him on the couch. "Anyway, it's not like you're one to talk! If I've never had a girlfriend, there's no way you've ever had one!"
"Actually, I'm apparently called the bad boy in school." Sanji turned to look at Zoro, shock written plainly on his face. "I've had a couple of girls actually try to ask me out. I always say no of course…" Sanji muttered something that sounded like 'bullshit' under his breath as he turned away.
Zoro stared at the back of Sanji's head and furrowed his brows as he remembered the reason that he was actually doing this. Zoro looked over Sanji's shoulder and cringed at the bandaged appendages he saw. When he was wrapping them, Zoro was in a bit of a hurry… even though he was sure he did a fine job, he was still worried that maybe they were just a bit too tight. It's not like he was a professional either, he'd just done what he taught himself to do while he was on his own. It would probably be safest to take the blond dumbass to an actual doctor…
Well I wouldn't have had to do it all if this fucking idiot didn't do this to himself!
Zoro raised his hand and rested his palm on Sanji head, his fingers threading through blond strands lightly. Zoro pressed down roughly and heard Sanji grunt in displeasure.
"Oi, what are you doing now?!" Sanji attempted to turn his head and look at Zoro, but Zoro kept his grip firm and the cook's head still. "Let go damnit! Or do you want my foot up your ass?!"
"Sanji." Sanji must have sensed the seriousness in Zoro's tone because he immediately fell silent. "Don't do that to yourself… ever again."
"Of course not dumbass… that shit hurt." Zoro felt a hint of a smile pull at the corners of his mouth. The two were silent for what could have been a couple minutes or a couple hours. Time had dragged to a slow crawl for the both of them and the spell of silence wasn't broken until what felt like an eternity had passed. Zoro heard Sanji take in a deep breath and watched his shoulders slump just slightly. "He… he never wanted a kid."
"Your dad." It wasn't a question.
"Yeah." Sanji looked tempted to fiddle with something. His fingers were twitching and Zoro didn't need to see his face to know he was probably biting his lip. He always did that whenever he couldn't get his hands on a smoke at school. He'd bite his lip or chew on a pencil, and then he'd beat it out the door when the bell rang and light one up.
"Pretty sure he didn't want to get married either… just needed somebody to hit." Zoro had guessed as much by the way Sanji would talk about the two. On the rare occasion he would mention them, he would speak so gently of his mother and spit his father's name like it was poisonous. Of course it was an abusive relationship, nothing else it could have been.
"I wasn't meant to happen. But… I think dad just saw it as another way to put her through pain, so he let her have me." Zoro got up from where he was sitting behind Sanji and moved to the kitchen. He'd thrown Sanji's pack of cigarettes on the island once they'd gotten to his house. Zoro pulled a smoke from the pack and walked back over to the blond. "She always protected me… always gave me whatever food she got. Whenever he would try to go after me… she would get in his way." Zoro stuck the cigarette between Sanji's lips and Sanji visibly relaxed.
"One day, he went too far. Hit her too hard. I tried to protect her but I just… I just got in the way." Sanji reached up and ran the tip of his finger along his temple as his teeth clenched. Sanji took another deep breath before continuing. "She hit her head on the corner of the table and…" Zoro placed a firm hand on Sanji shoulder as the blond let out a shaky breath. "After that, he forced me to help him hide the body… Fuck, if I hadn't been born, she- she could've gotten out! She stayed because of me…" Zoro squeezed Sanji's shoulder.
Zoro hoped that Sanji understood what Zoro was attempting to get across to him. Even though they fought a lot, they understood each other well. They both knew what was too far of a line to cross without even speaking it. What Zoro was trying to make Sanji understand at that moment was that he didn't have to keep talking. He'd said more than enough.
Zoro was surprised when he suddenly felt hands gripping onto the front of his shirt. Zoro felt his cheeks colour as Sanji pressed himself against Zoro's body. He felt so warm and Zoro was sorely tempted to wrap his arms protectively around the cook. Sanji's forehead rested against his collarbone and Zoro feel could tears beginning to stain his shirt.
"D-damnit cook! Your hands!" Sanji shook his head and whimpered. Zoro could only guess that he was recalling his memories all over again, just like he had at the stand. Zoro gave in and pulled Sanji tightly against his chest, winding his arms around Sanji's back and burying his nose in his hair. Zoro felt like he had to say something. Fuck, anything at all but just sitting there silently.
He could tell Sanji that it was all okay now. That he was there for him. He could say that he would protect him, never let anything so horrendous happen to him again. But would that truly matter coming from Zoro? The guy that Sanji couldn't stand to be around. But if actually couldn't stand to be around him, they wouldn't be in the position they were. They wouldn't be sitting frozen in time on Sanji's shitty couch in his empty apartment. Sanji wouldn't be clinging to him as if letting go would cause him to drown in the memories he'd long since repressed and ignored.
Zoro wracked his brain as he tried to think of anything he could say to pull Sanji back out of this pit that Zoro had practically thrown him into.
But he couldn't think of a thing that would change how desperately scared Sanji would be feeling at that moment. So he sat there and breathed in the subtle scent of vanilla. Vanilla, smoke, and a mixture of spices. It was unique and completely and utterly Sanji. Sanji's shampoo. Sanji's smokes. Sanji's passion for cooking. Zoro ran his hand over the small ponytail he'd just done up in Sanji's hair and played with the tips of hair that poked out.
Shit, if he can hear how fast my heart is beating right now I'm fucked. Zoro screwed his eyes shut and attempted to take deep breaths to calm himself, but with every breath he took came that damn scent. Sanji's subtle smell overpowered everything and practically shorted his brain. The only thing keeping him grounded was the fact that he knew he absolutely needed to comfort Sanji. He couldn't let whatever fucked up emotions he had started to develop get in the way.
"I was so weak… I couldn't do anything, no matter how much I wanted to! Now he's back out and- and I can't-!" Sanji sounded absolutely outraged with himself. Like there was nobody in the world that he hated more than himself in that moment. Zoro felt like shit for practically forcing Sanji to speak about his past, but if he'd kept it all in inside for any longer…
Zoro grabbed Sanji gently by his chin and tipped his head up. His eyes were red and puffy and tears stained and streaked his cheeks. His cigarette that remained unlit hung from his lips that were trembling with effort to hold back all the emotions damning up inside.
Zoro felt his heart throb painfully and his throat tightened as he finally decided what to say.
"Sanji." Zoro took the cigarette from Sanji's mouth and let it rest in the palm of his hand, crushing it and rolling it around. Zoro sucked in a breath through his nose and his heart thrummed in his chest as he leaned forward. "You are anything but weak."
Sanji's lips were soft and… salty.
