I don't own greys anatomy, just borrowing characters for my own amusement.
WARNING: SMUT
Derek woke up to an empty bed, a little sore and disappointed. He and Meredith had spent almost all night after the kids went to bed making love, fierce, passionate, kind of dirty love. Meredith had this urgency in her last night, almost as if she would die if she couldn't be with Derek. He understood her need, he had felt that way after her drowning and again after she had gotten clearance after having Bailey. They shared that need for each other after truly horrific accidents took place, they weren't sure why but they had an idea it was the thought of not being together again. He was excited to wake up to a naked Meredith and have sex once more before they started their day so he was upset to find her side of the bed unoccupied.
Derek glanced at the clock to find that it was only eight AM. He pulled himself out of bed, feeling all of his aches and pains. The muscles in his thighs were screaming with pain and his back was unusually sore. He hadn't realized how much he worked last night, but boy does Meredith know how to burn him out. Derek and Meredith had only had sex once since his accident and it had been that time in the hospital. Sure, it was great but only as great as it could be in a hospital. They had limited space and they couldn't be loud, which everyone knows they are pretty loud lovers.
Last night was like Meredith's way of saying, "welcome back" and Derek's way of proving his loyalty and love to Meredith.
You…you're everything. I love you and I'm not going to stop loving you. I can't live without you. I don't want to live without you, and I'm going to do everything in my power to prove it.
Derek remembered his promise to Meredith before the accident. He didn't really think almost getting killed was a good way to prove himself so he'd have to make it up by providing mind-blowing sex and maybe some breakfast. He was kidding, of course. He knew it was going to take a lot of time to regain Meredith's trust and rebuild their marriage, something he so desperately wanted to do. Derek planned to start to prove himself to Meredith by staying at home with the kids for a couple more months rather than going back to work in two weeks like the chief said he could. He could work on some Brain Mapping stuff from his home computer when there were deadlines coming up. He was content with his career at this point and he really wanted Meredith to thrive. He had thrown so much doubt at her work and he never stopped to realize how badly he made Meredith feel. He knew she still felt that way but she would never say anything because that's the way she is, she bottles things, and keeps things from him. She had probably called Cristina to talk to her about her insecurities but Derek knew her well enough to know she was hurting and doubting the weight of her work.
Derek's heart sank as he remembered one of their fights. Meredith had called in sick to work one day shortly after they decided they were staying in Seattle so that Meredith could focus on her career. What Derek didn't know was that she had found out that Maggie was Ellis and Richard's daughter and she turned to Alex and a bottle of tequila to work through her crap and try to get over her mommy issues. She had showed up to the board meeting and Derek was concerned because she never calls in sick. But then when she said that she was fine, just a little drunk he was beyond pissed.
You said you had to stay here to make the most of your career. When she tried to interrupt him and explain why she had stayed home he completely disregarded her and cut her off Wait, so I gave up the Brain Mapping Initiative so you can play hooky and get drunk with your friends? Is that why we're staying in Seattle?
He remembered spitting through his teeth at her. He could remember her face, a look of shock and hurt and pure anger. Her face said that she had given up, that their marriage was done. Derek was so insensitive to Meredith and her reasons for staying in Seattle. He knew it was hard for her to leave her home but he thought she would understand his need to be an active member of this project. Part of him even felt like she owed this to him after she destroyed his Alzheimer's trial. Of course once he found out about Maggie's parents he was there for Meredith but he wasn't very apologetic at the time for his words or actions. Now all he could think of was how sorry he was, he couldn't believe he was such a jerk to his wife. All Derek could feel lately, besides extreme thankfulness for his second chance at life, was guilt. Meredith had been taking such good care of him and he had been such an ass to her before his accident. He freaking kissed another woman and although he knew right away he only wanted to be with Meredith and that he missed his wife and kids, he still couldn't believe he had done such a thing. He was still shocked that Meredith even took him back but he was grateful and he couldn't wait to start proving to her that taking him back was a good idea, that he was a good, solid idea.
Derek quickly dressed and checked on the kids, they were still asleep, which was a blessing. They were normally up and running by this time but they had gone to bed much later the past few nights so that they could spend more time and catch up with their dad. He missed being a father so much. Sure, he missed his kids when he was in DC, but Derek never realized how much he enjoyed being around them and helping them. He couldn't help to feel a little sad that he'd missed seeing them grow up even in the slightest amount of time. He honestly was so excited to stay home with his kids and get to know them all over again.
Derek made his way throughout the house looking for Meredith, he figured she had woken up early and was drinking coffee on the porch or something. He was again matched with disappointment when he couldn't find her. He called her cell only to have the answering machine pick it up. He couldn't remember if she was on call or not but he assumed she had gotten called into the hospital earlier and he was in charge of the kids this morning.
Derek decided he was going to make the kids their favorite breakfast but when he tried to recall what their favorite food was he couldn't. Derek once again felt like shit. He wanted to curl up and disappear, he felt like such an ass and a failure and a terrible father. His father would've never forget his kids' favorite foods. Derek was sort of resembling Ellis Grey these days and he fucking hated it. His stomach rolled at the thought of calling Meredith her mother in a fight they had before he left for DC.
The self hatred was coming in strong today and Derek didn't think he could keep down much food if he tried so he settled with some coffee for himself and he would just make the kids eggs and pancakes. He promised himself he would jump full force back into his Seattle life. No more presidential meetings and suits and late nights working in labs and no more of Renee. He was more than happy to have more cuddle sessions and navy blue scrubs and early mornings making breakfast and more of Meredith.
When he was done making breakfast, Derek woke the kids up. They excitedly ran into the kitchen when they heard he had made pancakes. He was sure to make a mental note that pancakes were now the breakfast favorite in the Shepherd dream house. Derek went to the fridge and got out the whip cream and maraschino cherries he knew Meredith always kept hidden in the back. The kids squealed with happiness as he made a smiley face on their pancakes with the sugary goodies.
"Don't tell your mother I'm giving you guys all this sugar, please. She'll kill me." Derek told the kids with a smile and a wink.
"Of course we won't daddy! Mommy never lets us have sugar anymore because she says it'll make us crazy and then she'll go crazy. I don't really get it. Sugar is so yummy and it makes us so happy!" Zola rambled with big, bright eyes. Derek was sure that he could never say no to Zola. She has truly been the apple of his eye since day one.
"Yeah mama mean!" Bailey agreed in his not yet formed speech. Bailey was only two so he wasn't really using full sentences or pretty much any correct grammar.
"Hey, your mama is great Bails. I hope you guys didn't give her a hard time while I was in DC. She's been working so hard to make you guys happy." Derek knew his kids weren't actually mad at their mom for not allowing them sugar but he couldn't help but jump to her defense. He again thought guiltily of all the times Meredith probably had to handle the kids herself when they were giving her a tough time.
"Daddy, is your head booboo okay?" Zola asked as she peered up at Derek's head.
"Yes, Zozo I'm doing great. The booboo is almost all healed." It was true, he was recovery quickly with no headaches or nausea or anything.
"Can we play surgeons later so I can check it?" Zola asked.
"Yeah surgents surgents!" Bailey screamed, bouncing up and down. Derek obviously agreed, laughing and smiling the whole time.
Around one o'clock in the afternoon Derek stirred from his nap with the kids to the feel of lips on his forehead. He opened his eyes to find his beautiful wife kissing his head. "Hey. When did you get home? I didn't hear you come in." Derek caught his wife's lips in a kiss.
"Just now. Sorry I got called in around four AM. Poor girl got hit head on by a drunk driver. She made it, thank god. I just don't understand why people find the need to behave so carelessly." Meredith went on as she hung up her coat. She took a moment to look at her husband snuggled up with her kids on the couch. "God, I've missed this view. What'd you do to tire them out? Especially Zola, she never takes naps anymore."
Derek gently picked up the kids and moved them to the other couch so Meredith could sit with him while he caught her up on his day. She sat down next to him and leaned her back into his side so that she was laying on him while he played lightly with her hair. "We had such a fun packed morning. We drew pictures and then played with dolls and Legos. Then we had to clean everything up only so that they could take out their brand new kitchen and plastic foods to play chef and house, which by the way nice addition to the toy pile as if we really needed a make believe kitchen with every food item imagined, Mer. Then finally we played doctor so they could stab me in the head multiple times. They used my real stethoscope, it was so cute but definitely not fun when they dropped it on my head. Thank god we never actually gave Zola that suture kit for kids, I think she would actually cut into my brain." Derek truthfully did have the time of his life this morning playing with his kids, even if he did have to clean a big mess and get poked and prodded.
"Wow, sounds like quite the morning! How does your head feel? You shouldn't let the kids play with your head too much Derek. It's only been a couple weeks since your surgery." Meredith turned around and reached up to Derek's head, running her fingers along his very pink and still very new scar.
Derek only shrugged and said, "I'm okay. They were just having fun and they were gentle enough."
"If you say so. Please just be careful. I don't want any bleeders, okay? How have you been feeling? Any headaches? Or nausea? Shooting pains anywhere?" Meredith questioned, searching his face for any sign of pain or weakness. She came up with nothing as he smiled and shook his head, pressing his lips to hers once again and pulling her into a long, passionate kiss.
"How could I possibly have any pain with you around? Especially after a kiss like that one." Derek smiled at her as if she was the only thing in the world. She had missed him and that smile so much.
Meredith bit her lip and looked over to the kids. "How long have they been asleep?"
"I don't know, maybe like twenty minutes?" Derek said, confusion knitting together his eyebrows.
"Well when they nap its normally for an hour, hour and a half. You know what that leaves us time for?" Meredith asked suggestively. She smoothed her palm over his chest and brought her lips to his neck.
"Oh, a quickie. I love those, I've missed those." Derek grabbed Meredith's hand and led her to the bedroom, locking the door behind them.
Once inside, Derek attacked Meredith's neck. He licked at the spot he knew made her moan, effectively turning her on. He stripped off her shirt and then his own before she reached down to his belt. Her hands worked expertly at undoing his belt and the buttons to his jeans and then forcefully pushing down his pants. She ran her fingers against the now hard bulge in his boxers, eliciting a moan out of him. She slipped her fingers into his boxers and cupped him while she reconnected her lips with his. Derek couldn't take it anymore and pushed off his boxers, allowing his cock to spring free. Meredith pulled free from his mouth and dropped to her knees. Derek leaned up against the wall for support and threw his head back with a slight bang as Meredith's mouths enclosed around his hard length.
"Oh my god, Mer. Mmmm." Derek moaned as low as he could in such a pleasure-filled situation. Meredith's tongue continued to swirl around him. When she felt him tremble a bit, his normal warning that he was close, she quickly pushed him all the way into her mouth, feeling him enter her throat.
"Holy shit!" Derek barely was able to breathe at the sudden feel of the tightness. He grabbed hard onto Meredith's hair as she started humming with him in her throat. He couldn't hold it anymore and started jerking inside her mouth as he harshly finished.
"Wow, I forgot how good you were." Derek panted. Meredith replied with a wink as Derek's fingers worked to strip her of her bra. Once the article was discarded, he attacked her breasts with his mouth and hands, bringing her nipples to hard peaks. While he was sucking on one, his hands were flicking the other nipple. Meredith moaned, so happy her husband still knew exactly what to do to turn her on. Derek's mouth began to trail down her stomach, stopping when his tongue met her waistband. He helped Meredith push off her pants and the tiny strip of lace that covered her wet center. Derek got on his knees and gently pushed Meredith against the wall, hitching her leg onto his shoulder so that his mouth could reach her sweet pussy. His tongue pushed inside of her, quickly drawing a loud moan from the back of her throat. He ran his tongue throughout the length of her, stopping to push inside every chance he could. When he knew she was getting closer, he sucked at her clit and pushed two fingers inside of her, driving her crazy with pleasure. She squeezed her legs together hard on his face and hand as she felt herself getting closer. Most guys would pull away but the pain she inflicted only made Derek hungrier. He ravished her even more, bringing her quickly to finish. Meredith thrusted towards Derek's mouth and spilled, allowing him to lick up her sweet extract.
Derek came back up to her lips, kissing her hard, letting her taste herself on him. He pulled back to turn her around so that her hands were pressed up against the wall and he was facing her behind. They loved dirty quickies and nothing said dirty like taking her from behind. Meredith pushed her hands against the wall and stuck her ass towards Derek's hard member. His hands spread across her back, running down the length of her spine to grab hold of her ass. He squeezed her ass roughly and then quickly pushed into her. Meredith threw her head back in pleasure. Being taken from behind was her guilty pleasure and she loved that Derek was always up for it. She felt him grab onto her hair and pull as he thrust into her again. She tried to meet his thrusts to maximize their pleasure. She slide her hands farther down the wall, allowing herself to bend over more almost as if she was about to touch her toes. Her ass pushed farther into Derek's face, which she knew he loved. She felt Derek twitch a bit, knowing he was close to finishing. Realizing this too, Derek moved his hand in between her legs, working at her clit, flicking the sensitive nub just the way she likes.
"Oh Derek, keep going please. Don't stop, I'm SO close. Harder, Der, harder! Fuck me harder." Meredith begged. Derek still couldn't believe how dirty and demanding she could be in bed but he loved it about her. He granted her pleas as he slapped her ass hard and pounded into her another time. They both know she'd be marked up but they didn't care. "Ugh, Derek again. Please, help me finish. Fuck me Derek hard!" Derek again did as she asked. He smacked her ass, pulled out slightly and again rammed into her. Meredith cried out and her thighs tightened. Her pussy clenched his cock as he released inside of her. Shortly after, she spilled all around him. They lay against the way for a few minutes after, catching their breath and taking in the breathtaking, dirty sex they just had.
"Wow." Derek mumbled.
"Yeah. You've still got it, Der." Meredith teased. Derek laughed and kissed her back. God, she loved when he did that. It was such a sweet, loving gesture that she just couldn't get enough of. Derek pulled out of her and handed her her robe while he pulled on a pair of sweatpants.
"Do you hear the kids, are they up yet?" Derek asked.
Meredith pressed her ear to the door before replying, "No. Why do you wanna go again?" She teased, raising her eyebrows.
"No, I'm exhausted. Jesus, I think we've had more sex in the last twenty four hours than we've had our entire relationship." Derek joked. What a funny joke though, they both knew they were sex crazed and they'd done it way too many times to even think about counting. "I want to lie down with you for a little while. I didn't get to wake up with you this morning."
"Ugh, I was hoping for more sex." Meredith pouted, climbing into bed with her husband.
"Wow, you've been so horny lately. What's gotten into you?" Derek teased.
"I've just missed you and I've missed sex." Meredith laughed. As much as she loved sex, she always appreciated the times where they just lied in bed talking or cuddling.
"Trust me, Mer, you have no idea how much I've missed you." Derek scooted closer to Meredith, pulling her in for a kiss and cuddling her. They had both missed this. DC had ruined so many things for them and changed so many aspects of their relationship but reuniting had been so amazing so far. Neither of them could deny their attraction for each other still and their unfaltering need for each other. Meredith clutched tightly onto Derek, thinking of the time she almost didn't get to have this ever again. Derek clutched tightly back, kissing her head as she drifted off to sleep.
So I know this chapter was kind of a downer and kind of sucked since we all want merder to be happy and leave their problems in DC. But in reality, thats not how marriages work and thats not how merder would work on the show either. Derek was super mean to Meredith throughout some of 10 and most of 11. They were constantly fighting and going at each other's throats and thats not just something that goes away. Of course near death accidents will distract the hurt for a while but I think its important to bring it up and rehash some of those feelings of guilt and hurt and sadness. The next chapter will definitely have some kind of conversation between Meredith and Derek about the past but I promise to be nice! Also, I feel super responsible to represent these characters accurately so Meredith will continue to doubt herself compared to Derek a bit more and she will always lean more on Cristina than she does on Derek. You have to remember that merder's relationship wasn't necessarily one built on support but rather lust and attraction and relief. It was like I was drowning and you save me.
As always, leave some love, xx.
