But if there's a pill to help me forget,

God knows I haven't found it yet

But I'm dying to, God I'm trying to

Stiles POV:

I know that whatever we have isn't real, well at least on Derek's half but for me it was getting harder and harder to find where to draw the line between friends with benefits and being in a relationship especially the longer our little tryst continued. In the beginning it was easy, it was just sex but as time wound on we found ourselves doing other stuff as well stuff like any normal couple would do. Like snuggling up on the couch watching tv together or even just spooning in bed after a particular trying day or experience with the latest big bad. It was really nice, I mean we were still having mind blowing sex but it was also nice to think that perhaps Derek wasn't just using me for sex afterall that perhaps he felt something more for me too.

One night while on the outskirts of the reserve, the pack came up against a particularly nasty trio of wolves hell bent on death and destruction in Beacon Hills and due in no small part of using myself as bait, we had managed to corner them but they weren't going down without a fight. Scott had managed to distract one long enough for Derek to attack it from behind and after some teamwork between the two of them they managed to rip the throat out of the first wolf. The Second was occupying Allison, Isaac and Lydia who between the three of them were having some success in incapacitating said wolf. In taking stock of the scene in front me I quickly realised that one of the enemy wolves were missing. Unfortunately, my realisation came a little too late and next thing I know there's a hand wrapped around my neck from behind and wrasping breath in my ear, "You think you and you're friends have won? You think you and the big guy," as he said this he steered my gaze towards Derek, "will get a happily ever after? You're weak. You have no abilities that could make you useful to the pack unless perhaps maybe you're that good in the sack." As this is being said I can feel him grinding in to me and I am frozen in fear and the only thing I can do is whimper and close my eyes. With my friends otherwise engaged it dawns on me that no one will come to my rescue. This is wolf is right, I am useless I can't even protect myself, is it any wonder Derek doesn't love me back the way I love him. I have resigned myself to this fact and as I do I feel the hand around my neck tighten, restricting my breathing and just as I am about to pass out I feel my body sailing through the air and my heading hit what I think is a tree and then everything goes black.

"Stiles. Stiles come on wake up." The voice sounds so familiar but yet in my addled state I can't place it. As my senses slowly begin working again, two things become very clear. The first is that the pain in the back of my head is beyond excruciating and that there is some sort of slick substance running down the back of my neck which I soon realise is blood. My blood. The second is that there is a slight pressure on my hand but it is not until I open eyes that I realise that its Lydia holding my hand and that there are five faces staring back me, each with varying looks of worry on their faces. I groan as I try to sit up from position on the floor of the woods but before I can get too far in that thought a hand is placed in the middle of my chest slowly forcing me back into a lying down position. The hand on my chest, surprisingly enough was Derek's. Scott however was the first to talk, "Dude, you gave us all quite the scare. Don't ever do that again. I don't know what I would do without my brother." He said with a small smirk on his face. I was in too much pain to really respond with anything more than a grimace, which made all their faces return to one of worry. Thankfully, Lydia broke the uncomfortable silence, "Right we can't leave him here, he needs to go to the hospital." Ever the sensible one, she squeezes my hand as she speaks. "No he doesn't he come back to mine." This statement from Derek has everyone's eyes leaving me and turning to him like he had just sprouted two heads or something. Realising all the attention his last statement had just gotten he quickly continues, "I can heal him, alpha powers remember. Besides it might take a little while and take a lot out of me so its better I do it at the loft then out here in the middle of the words." His explanation seemed to appease the rest of the pack. Before Isaac added, "Yeah and besides his dad is out of town remember, so if he does have a concussion he probably shouldn't be alone tonight so where better for him to rest and recuperate then with an alpha." He seemed pleased at himself at the statement, I was in too much pain to really consider why. Scott was next to speak, "Alright then its settled, Derek, Stiles will go with you back to the loft, if you need anything or anything happens call me." He says this as he looks pointedly at me. Isaac and Scott go to help me off the ground but before they have the chance Derek scoops me up in his arms, bridal style, and the pack makes their way back towards the cars. Derek proceeds to strap me into the passenger's seat of the Camaro before fishing the keys for my jeep out of my pocket and tossing them at Scott. I vaguely remember seeing Scott and Isaac piling into my jeep and Allison and Lydia getting into Lydia's car before hearing the rumble of the Camaro beneath me and then we were headed towards the loft.

I must have fallen asleep on the way to the loft because the next time I open my eyes I am lying on the couch and not in the sitting in the car. "Good you're awake." I hear his voice coming from the kitchen as he walks in carrying a bowl and a wash cloth, placing both on the coffee table in front of me before gently lifting my head and sitting down so that I am now leaning with my head in his lap. He gently, lifted my head and began to clean the now dry blood from the back of my head. As he did so I realised he was pulling the pain from me as it started to lessen and as such I was able to concentrate more on the light caresses that Derek was now pressing to the side of my face. I looked up into his eyes and he stared back at mine. "You scared me tonight." He said barely above a whisper but still clear enough for me to hear. Before I could respond he leant down and kissed me and it was unlike any kiss we had shared previously. Where usually our kisses were rough and fuelled by need, this one seemed more tender, like we had all the time in the world. We reluctantly pulled away and slowly got into a more comfortable position in which we were both lying on our sides on the couch and he was spooning me, an arm pulling my back firmly against his chest. Both exhausted, it didn't take long for either of us to drift off to sleep but as I did I couldn't help but think I truly love this man and that thought brought a smile to my face.

We were woken the next morning unexpectedly by two voices before either one of us could shake our sleep induced daze, there was suddenly two people standing in the doorway to the loft staring at us gobsmacked. Next thing I know Derek has unceremoniously dumped me on the floor in his haste to get up. That shakes Lydia and Isaac from their places at the door as they race forward to help me from the floor as Derek had made no effort to help me himself. "What are the two you doing here?" Derek says gruffly rubbing a hand on the back of his neck, clearly making every effort to avoiding addressing the fact that Lydia and Isaac had just walked in on us snuggling on the couch. Lydia threw a duffle bag at Derek and replied, "We thought Stiles might need some clean clothes and we wanted to make sure that he was okay but it seems as though he was in very capable hands." She said this last bit trying to keep the smirk off her face, which just made me blush. After hearing this Derek's mood seemed to go from bad to worse, so I decided to ask Lydia if she wouldn't mind dropping me home on her way to drop Isaac back at Scott's. She agreed and after changing I made a hasty retreat out of the loft, Derek ignoring me the entire time.

Nobody spoke again until the three of us were in the car and it was Isaac who broke the silence. "So you and Derek huh? I knew it" he said it like he was so pleased with himself. "What do you mean?" I managed to get out, stunned from my place in the backseat. "Come on Stiles it's obvious that you guys have chemistry, I'm just surprised it took you guys this long." Lydia said without taking her eyes off the road. "Its plain to see that you both have feelings for each other." She continued before Isaac chimed in with "Yeah he definitely loves you." This made me laugh and both of them turned from their places in the front seat to glance at me. I answered their looks explaining my laugh, "The feelings you're seeing are mine for him, all that I am to him is a warm body." It hurt to voice these thoughts out loud but I continued. "I am just a means of distraction until Braeden decides on their future and then he will dump my sorry ass like yesterday's newspaper." Lydia thought for a second but spoke once more, "Maybe that's how it started but last night I saw the way he looked at you, how worried he was. I think perhaps his feelings for you are stronger than you think. Talk to him, tell him how you feel. I think you could be pleasantly surprised by his response." Could Lydia be right? Is it possible that Derek likes me back, maybe even loves me like I love him?