I wake up once again in darkness. The crisp night air coming through the open window makes me hope that part of this festival is a bonfire.
I get up and dress in a blue dress that I replicated based on a pattern I wore on New Earth. As I slip my shoes on, Chakotay walks into the room dripping water from his recent shower.
"You can't stay out of the water today, can you?"
"The water experience in the vision quest didn't get me clean. Besides, this is the first tribal festival I have attended in a decade, with my wife-to-be no less. It's a special occasion."
Chakotay dons his leather pants and a loose cream top.
"Children, the festival is starting. It would not do to have the guests of honor be late." Mothers are the same everywhere.
We enter the living room to find Kolopak and Yatzil already there. Kolopak is dressed in a similar fashion to Chakotay. His pants are closer to tan and his shirt is darker than Chakotay's. Yatzil is wearing a maxi dress that is pure white. The contrast between her dark hair and skin and the dress is magnificent.
"Mother, you look stunning."
"You make me proud, daughter. The dress is very nice with your skin and eyes."
I see Chakotay rake me over at the same time as Kolopak is busy looking at Yatzil. I have stopped being surprised at the similarities I find in these two men.
"Come on children."
I am about to take Chakotay's arm when Yatzil intercepts. "Come daughter."
I look back for a second at Chakotay before doing as I am told.
"This festival will begin by blessing your future union. Normally a daughter of the tribe would be brought by her parents and then leave on the arm of her intended. Since that won't work, I'll just have to be a stand in."
"I am pleased to be brought into the folds by you, mother. You birthed the other half of my soul. You are more my mother than mother-in-law."
"So I am, daughter."
I can see that my words please Yatzil, not that that is my intent. I truly mean every word.
After a few minutes I realize that I am being led to Anam.
I hear Chakotay from a few steps behind me say to Kolopak, "a festival at Anam. It is very important, indeed."
Answering my silent inquiry Yatzil says, "a festival is held at Anam only when honoring something or someone whom the spirits have blessed. You, your union to my son, has been seen in many vision quests. The tribal leaders believe it to be blessed. As do I."
The last few minutes to Anam are in silence. The sight that greets me is almost more magnificent than the one I saw early this morning. The full moon is reflecting off the polished rock creating the appearance of the sky on the ground. It is like a crystal clear lake that can be stood on.
The tribal leader begins his speech knowing we have arrived without ever even looking our way.
"We stand on this land given by the great spirits. For generations, our ancestors wouldn't rest until they found the place blessed by the spirits. On a night much like this, generations ago, a lone warrior made his way to Anam. As he saw the sky reflected on the rock, he knew his tribe's journey was at an end. It was now time to rest."
"Anam is a sacred place to our people. A portal to worlds beyond our comprehension. It is a place of blessing and understanding. Tonight we honor the future union of two kindred souls. Just this morning they sat at Anam and walked together in the spirit realm. Just this morning, Kathryn realized that Chakotay's spirit animal had been walking in her vision quests during trying times. Just this morning, Chakotay recognized that their spirit animals had the same eyes."
Silence had been reigning, but a loud whisper carries on the wind when the last sentence is told.
"All those who walk the physical world hope to meet a soul that is the same as theirs. Kathryn and Chakotay have done the impossible. Through that, they have saved each other and all of us."
"The sacred blessing of Anam on the lady with fire in her hair and her Angry Warrior."
"Anam." Everyone replies.
Yatzil takes me from the top of the hill to the center of Anam. Three paces behind me, Kolopak is leading Chakotay in much the same manner.
Yatzil drops my hand before cradling my face in between her palms. "Anam, my darling daughter."
Kolopak leans in and whispers something to Chakotay before kissing his cheek. "Anam, my son."
With that Chakotay turns to me and places both hands on my shoulder. I place my hands over his heart.
"My Woman Warrior, you still raging rivers and calm infernos. The spirit world sings of your triumphs. I am blessed in the knowledge that you will soon be my wife. Anam to you, my love."
"My Angry Warrior, you bring calm through your contrary ways. The ancestors set you in my path to protect me from all harm, including myself. With you I am safe. Anam to you, my love."
Once again all those congregated speak at once. "Anam, mighty warriors."
The rest of the festival is filled with people coming up in small groups offering blessings and advice.
The advice ends just as the sun rises on Anam and is reflected on the faces of the tribal members. Beside me, Chakotay puts his hand behind my head and pulls me in for a searing kiss. I can feel the eyes of the tribe behind us, but I can't help but respond.
As we turn, I see a family. One that Chakotay ran from for a decade. I can tell in his eyes that he sees the same thing. I take Chakotay's hand and put our fingers together before softly saying, "Anam."
