Chapter 7: Hunting and Gathering
"People have a hard
time letting go of
their suffering.
Out of fear of the unknown,
they prefer suffering
that is familiar."
-Thich Nhat Hanh
The moment the word 'pass' crossed Kakashi-sensei's masked lips Sakura felt a strange combination of both relief and anger. How dare the man make them worry like that? How dare he let them think their future goals were for naught? Her spine straightened with righteous indignation, but her stomach was positively writhing with the combination of nausea and blooming excitement.
She quickly cast a glance at her teammates to see how they were taking the news. Peeking to the left, she noticed Sasuke's haughty smirk- as if he had expected Kakashi's declaration all along. Naruto on the other hand was much more vocal about his enthusiasm.
"Shinobi! Shinobi! Shinobi! I am a shinobi!" Naruto chanted as he danced about.
"Yes, Naruto, you are now officially a genin," Kakashi-sensei drawled. "But do any of you know why I decided to pass you?"
Sakura chewed on her lip for a moment. Perhaps Kakashi-sensei realized on his walk to the Hokage Tower how talented they were? Naruto after all did produce multiple shadow clones, and Sasuke had always been an exemplary student in the academy, so surely whatever tactics he applied were impressive.
And as for herself… Sakura frowned. She knew that she had not performed to the best of her ability. Her skill with a whip was notable, and she did manage to mask her chakra, thus hiding herself well. But she had not attempted any truly remarkable offensive maneuvers, and no display of ninjutsu at all…
But perhaps her teammates had managed to impress their lazy sensei and he changed his mind, not wanting to hinder their future. She bit down on her lip harder.
"Because we are totally awesome! Believe it!" Naruto practically shouted.
Kakashi-sensei made a noise that was akin to a sign, "Not exactly, Naruto."
Kakashi's lone eye focused in on the orange clad boy. "Naruto, you displayed absolutely no subtly, which is not a good trait for a nin. Instead of planning an attack, you simply charged and hoped for the best. You need to work on using your head and not just blindly rushing into things. If I were a real enemy, you would be dead."
"Tch, dobe," Sasuke scoffed from beside Sakura.
Naruto's entire body swung around, blue eyes narrowed, "What was that teme?"
"I wouldn't be so quick to judge Sasuke." Kakashi said, interrupting what was sure to be another bickering match. "You too had your faults. You're arrogant and have tunnel vision. I admit your skills are impressive, but impatience and over confidence led to an easy defeat."
"Hah- take that you arrogant teme!"
Sasuke's lips thinned slightly, but otherwise he displayed no outward reaction. Nothing to tell of disappointment, humiliation, or humbleness. Nothing to even hint at the annoyance Sakura was sure he was feeling towards Naruto's needling.
Sakura sat up straighter when Kakashi's eye landed on her. "And finally you, Sakura. You're strategy was good, I will admit. And your skill with the whip was unexpected. But you were easy prey to one of the most basic genjutsus. One that I know is taught at the Academy."
Sakura could feel her throat tighten as she remembered the misty version of Great Uncle Itsuki towering over her. Dark eyes, hot breath, trailing fingers… She shook the thoughts away.
If she was going to be a capable shinobi, let alone a good one than she needed to get over the incident. Being paralyzed with the repulsive combination of fear and disgust would only grant an enemy the advantage. She couldn't succumb to this weakness…
"Yes sensei," she replied, trying hard to ignore both Sasuke and Naruto's eyes boring into her.
Kakashi's dark eye narrowed for a moment, before he straightened out of his relaxed posture. "Each of you failed to recognize what the true lesson behind the bell test was- teamwork. If you had worked together from the beginning than I am confident you all would have passed, even with the restrictions I listed. There is a reason that shinobi are placed in teams. And each of you need to learn how to work with each other."
"Not all shinobi work in teams," Sasuke countered and Sakura noticed his fist clenched in his lap.
Kakashi gazed at him in silence for a moment. "That's true, some shinobi are sent on solo missions. But for the most part nin work better in teams. Your teammates can make up for your weakness and you can add to their strengths. The reason I passed you is because you all just demonstrated teamwork in giving Naruto lunch."
Sakura felt a dull sort of bewilderment at his statement. She had passed the bell test and become a genin because she had given Naruto lunch? Nothing to do with their potential, or how impressive they were, or Konoha believing in second chances. Just a riceball…
Without saying another word, Kakashi-sensei turned and started walking towards the training ground's exit.
"Hey, where are you going?" Naruto called after him.
"I'm going to show you three something very important. Do try and keep up."
Sakura followed behind an exuberant Naruto, who was practically nipping at Kakashi's heels like a puppy. Her emotions were having a rogue battle inside her to decide whether she felt happy, embarrassed, or relieved. The only thing she knew for certain was that she was determined. She would work harder, become better.
"What did you see?" a quiet voice from behind her asked.
Sakura looked over her shoulder to see Sasuke's permanently intense eyes staring at her.
"What do you mean?" she inquired, internally hoping that he wouldn't ask the question she dreaded.
Sasuke fell into step beside her. "I saw you. When you were behind the tree, cloned as Naruto. I saw Kakashi's genjutsu hit you. So, what did you see?"
Sakura kept her face as blank as she would while experiencing one of Grandmother Satomi's insult tirades. She kept her eyes on the two figures ahead of her. "That's a bit of a personal question, don't you think?"
She caught a glimpse of Sasuke's appraising look out of her peripherals.
"I suppose. But we are teammates after all. Like Kakashi said, your weaknesses-"
Sakura flinched noticeably at the word.
"-are my weaknesses. And I can't afford to be weak."
The look she shot her new teammate was poisonous. Sasuke's usually stoic expression actually morphed into shock at her venomous glare.
"Don't worry teammate, I've got it covered. It won't happen again," Sakura practically spat.
Sasuke offered his own dower glare in response.
She internally fumed at the nerve the Uchiha had. He was an individual that practically had a 'keep out' sign nailed to his chest when it came to his private business and yet he dare interrogate her about her own? The genjutsu was meant to show an individual one of their worst fears, and Sasuke knew that… Surely his manners were not so unrefined that he would be able to understand what a faux-pas asking about it was…
"Well I'm glad to see you two are getting along so well," Kakashi-sensei said, drawing their attention.
He was standing in front of the shinobi memorial stone. Sakura had witnessed more than once a person visiting or even weeping over the engraved names.
"Hey sensei, where are we going?" Naruto questioned.
"We are actually here Naruto. On the stone in front of you are the names of Konoha's greatest shinobi heroes."
Sakura watched in mounting disbelief as Naruto's face lit up and he ran over to the stone. "Awesome! I'm going to be on this stone one day! Believe it!"
Green eyes watched as her sensei's figure hunched over. Sakura quickly debated with herself on whether or not she should tell Naruto that that stone was a monument to the dead, but decided that Kakashi-sensei must have brought them there for a purpose. He could explain how harsh reality was to the energetic blonde.
She looked to her right to see Sasuke standing stiff as a board, eyes frantically searching over the names. She wondered if he was looking for those of his family.
"Naruto," Kakashi-sensei began, his tone unusually serious compared to his normal drawl. "The names on the stone represent all the shinobi that have died in service to our village. They are heroes because they gave up their lives so we could live peacefully."
Naruto's enthusiasm wilted into uncharacteristic somberness, but he made no move to back away from the stone. Instead blue eyes took in the names with a more respectful light.
"The names of my old teammates are on that stone. My best friend's name is on that stone," Kakashi continued.
He turned and his dark eye somberly took in the freshly minted Team Seven. "I am going to tell you something- something that is regarded as controversial in most shinobi villages, but I want you to take this to heart. You have been taught that nothing is more important than the mission- your morals, your safety, even your lives. And in many ways that's true."
Sakura inwardly agreed with his statement. Even if the instructors at the academy tried to instill the seriousness of being a shinobi into their students, they still tended to skim over the more gruesome details of what that could entail. But Sakura had researched and read in between the lines enough to understand what everyone glossed over. Shinobi died, or were left behind for the sake of their missions. It was reality.
"Those who break the rules are scum. But those who turn their backs on, or leave their teammates behind are even worse than scum."
Sakura's eyes widened at Kakashi's contentious, almost treasonous speech.
"Missions are important. They are important for keeping our village safe- but nothing is worth your teammate's lives. While together, Team Seven will be your family, and no one sacrifices family," Kakashi said, voice impassioned.
And for perhaps the millionth time that day, Sakura felt shock enter her system… Team Seven was to be family? But she already had a family… Granted not a very accepting, or loving, or even close family. But they were family all the same. And Sakura wasn't sure if she wanted Kakashi-sensei, Naruto, or Sasuke treating her like the Haruno clan did. She wanted them to think she was a strong kunoichi, not a doormat to cruel words and false-superiority.
She looked over to see how her new 'family' members were reacting to Kakashi's declaration.
Naruto seemed as if he was torn between disbelief, excitement, and uncertainty. He shot Sasuke a grumpy look, but his whiskered cheeks lifted when his blue eyes clashed with her green.
Sasuke on the other hand was standing stock still, and his already pale face looked as if it had gone even paler. Dark eyes that were always so unreadable looked full of pain in the brief glimpse she caught.
"If you do not think you can abide by that rule, than I am sorry, you cannot be a genin…at least not in my team." Kakashi somberly stated.
Naruto in an uncharacteristic show of seriousness said, "I can do that." He blushed slightly, "it will be nice to have a family."
If only he knew…
Sasuke remained silent, but nodded sharply in ascent. Sakura figured that he would sell his own kidneys to become a shinobi, so agreeing to this temporary family, even superficially was worth it.
And Sakura couldn't help but agree with what she was sure the raven- haired boy was thinking. Because family had never been something that inspired warm feelings within her. And if she were to grow close to any of them and they died, it would be devastating.
But at the same time, she was determined to become a shinobi. And the path to her future greatness lied with these people. So she would accept them as her teammates, and maybe even form a tentative friendship. But they would never ever befamily. She wouldn't let them.
"That sounds acceptable," Sakura agreed, wondering at the ominous feeling in her gut.
Kakashi's eye crinkled in a sure sign of a hidden smile. "Good. Now take the rest of the day off. Train, rest, work on your hobbies… We will meet on the bridge tomorrow morning at the same time."
And with an almost condescending wiggle of his fingers, Kakashi-sensei was gone in a poof of silver smoke.
Sakura stared at the spot that Kakashi had been standing. For all that family members scorned or academy instructors praised her on her observational skills, she had seriously misjudged the man. Sakura had figured that he was a type of lone wolf- his mask and lazy disposition only added to her theory. But he had just shared that he was more of a pack creature- fiercely devoting himself to his team and expecting the same from them in return. Sakura was not sure if she could fully commit to that though. She had always fancied herself a lone wolf too.
"So, Sakura-chan," Naruto slyly said, breaking her from her thoughts. "How about we go get dinner together? To celebrate being official genin teammates!"
Sakura didn't necessarily want to be the one to dull the earnest excitement in Naruto's blue eyes, but she had also just figured out the perfect way to spend her free time. However, she was sure her other teammate would be happy enough to play the bearer of bad news, so…
"Shouldn't you be inviting Sasuke-san too then? He is our teammate too, after all."
Naruto's face twisted into a scowl, and Sasuke, who was heading towards the street paused.
"I suppose the teme could come…" Naruto grumbled.
Sakura inwardly cursed, not anticipating Naruto actually extending his dinner invitation to his rival.
Sasuke turned around and looked at her and Naruto for a moment. "No thank you," he finally said, his words polite, but voice hard.
"Too good for us, eh teme? Well Kakashi-sensei doesn't think so!" Naruto growled, darting down the street after Sasuke.
Sakura dared to let a little smirk free. At least some things in life would always be predictable. And as annoying as her two teammate's bickering was, it would keep their thoughts from lingering too long on her. Which was a good thing.
She walked briskly to her destination not knowing how much time Sasuke's haughty demeanor would grant her before Naruto came back around looking for her. And even though a small part of her felt guilty, she had work to do. Naruto was a thick-skinned (and skulled) boy after all; he would shake off her disappearance. Besides, he did just leave her at the memorial stone right after issuing a dinner invitation, which was hardly polite…
Still, her conscious informed her that this was not a great way to begin forming bonds with her teammates. But as she pulled open the heavy doors to the Shinobi Library, Sakura figured it would be worth it. She needed information now. On one masked man in particular.
Walking over to the front desk, Sakura spotted a clearly bored brown haired chunin boy lounging on the clerk's desk. Exhilaration made her heart beat faster as each step drew her closer to the counter.
She had never been allowed in this library before- only registered shinobi could enter. And while Mizuki-sensei had given her scrolls from here before (something that she was sure was against the rules), she had never been allowed to peruse freely before.
The gangly chunin lazily flickered his eyes to her headband. "Proceed," he said, his attention already tuned back to a small orange book.
Sakura felt almost affronted at his lack of caution. For all he knew she could be henged or a student who failed their genin test! And to think that someone no more competent than a lazy house cat guarded a building that stored some of the most powerful and dangerous information the village had! If she had known that, Sakura would have tried her hand at sneaking in a long time ago.
Shaking her disgruntled thoughts away, she walked past the boy, her eyes widening at the explicit image printed on the page of his 'reading material'. Scowl firmly in place Sakura marched forward, wanting to ask the chunin where the bingo books were kept, but not wanting to pull him from his pornography.
So she wandered aimlessly for a while. Her attention being pulled in all different directions, as she spotted too many sections containing interesting information… But she was here on a mission. So with great reluctance and slight discipline, Sakura ignored the other titles, as she searched. And after fifteen minutes of scouring the east side of the building, she stumbled upon an entire aisle of bingo books.
The shelves alone were almost three times her height, and each one was jam packed with slim black books. Her green eyes scanned the shelves, noting that each shelf represented a Hidden Village.
Sakura smiled when she finally found Konoha's shelf. Pulling a random book at eye level out, she flipped to the back cover and looked at the date. It was about fifteen years old. She delicately put it back in place.
Taking a step back Sakura pondered for a moment- how old was Kakashi-sensei exactly? His odd hair coloring would normally indicate that he was reaching the elderly stage of his life, but Sakura had watched him during the bell test and he was incredibly fast and nimble. Granted, retired shinobi were still forces to be reckoned with, but Kakashi-sensei's body spoke of a much more youthful age.
Her mind also reminded her of the conversation she had had with her mother this morning. Her mother knew Kakashi-sensei, or she knew of him at least. Which would put Kakashi's age somewhere between his thirties and forties, if Sakura guessed right.
She moved further down the shelf and then shook her head at her own stupidity…why was she looking for an old bingo book? Kakashi-sensei was still alive and if he was as competent a jounin as she suspect, he would have a section devoted to him in the current copy.
Crouching down, Sakura picked up the very last book on the bottom of the shelf. She checked the back cover just to be sure and was pleased to see this was Konoha's current bingo book. A book full of faces that were either Konoha's own criminals, or Konoha's elite that were wanted in other shinobi nations… Sakura fully intended for her own face to grace these pages in the future.
She leafed through the book until she hit the 'H' section. Kakashi-sensei's profile was the second on the list. A medium size picture of his masked face, lone black eye and unruly silver hair stared back at her. And Sakura's eyes widened as she looked at the status listed next to his name- S Ranked. And while Sakura figured that his lazy demeanor was a front to cover calculating intelligence, she had never thought her sensei was this big of a deal.
Come to think about it, why would he even be hired as a jounin sensei, if his talents were clearly suited elsewhere…
While her mind swirled with the implications, she also thought of the possibilities. The things that an S ranked nin could teach her… Green eyes reverently absorbed the rest of the information on the page.
Hatake, Kakashi, known alias: The Copy-Cat Nin, Cold Blooded Kakashi, and Kakashi of the Sharingan.
Sakura's eyes froze on the last alias...sharingan.
When Sakura was young she had read a book on the great shinobi clans and how the fierce and noble Uchiha clan possessed the sharingan. Later, when she had started attending the academy, Sakura learned through gossip what exactly the sharingan was- or at least what the public was allowed to know. It was a blood limit that allowed the user to copy any jutsu and use advanced genjutsu. But as far as Sakura knew, the only people that were able to produce the sharingan where the Uchiha clan…
Sakura's eyes narrowed as she puzzled through what this could mean…Was Kakashi-sensei actually an Uchiha? She studied his photo again- he sure didn't look like any of the other clan members she had known. And surely if he was a secret clan member he would have taken Sasuke in after the massacre. The only other option she could think of was that her sensei had much more in common with her and he was a bastard of one of the now dead Uchiha clansmen.
But as her eyes skimmed down the page and Sakura read just who exactly Kakashi's father was, her wild theory was nixed. Hatake Sakumo- The White Fang of Konoha, one of her childhood heroes was his father. Sakura wondered if it would be appropriate to ask him if he had a pack of nin dogs too…
Reading through the rest of the information Sakura had gleaned that Kakashi-sensei excelled at both taijutsu and ninjutsu. But with his possession of the sharingan, Sakura was sure that he was formidable in wielding genjutsu too. Her sensei appeared to be a jack of all trades, and yet a master of them too.
It was impressive and mustered more confidence in the girl. She was sure that now that Team Seven had passed the bell test, he would take their training more seriously. Kakashi-sensei was also much younger than she originally had guessed, only being in his late twenties. His odd hair color was a genetic quirk, much like her own.
Closing the book, Sakura placed it back in its spot and headed towards the exit. She was sorely tempted to linger and lose herself in the vast wealth of information, but her rumbling stomach alerted her that it was dinnertime.
As she reached the service desk, Sakura noticed a platinum blonde girl had joined the chunin boy.
"If your parents are being such a pain in the ass than why don't you just get your own place?" the boy asked his company, his eyes barely glancing up from that same orange book.
"Renji, are you even listening to me?" the girl demanded.
Sakura approached the desk and both of them stared at her for a moment.
Renji sighed, "You need to sign this," he passed Sakura a sign out sheet.
Sakura dutifully autographed the line, while half listening to their conversation.
"Mai, you're a shinobi, you make enough money that you can afford your own place."
Pushing the paper back, she quickly left the library, her mind lingering on the two chunin's words. Now that she was an official shinobi, she was considered an adult of the village and would be paid to partake on missions.
And because she was legally an adult, she could live on her own… A smile played on her face for barely a second before her shoulders slumped- her father would never go for that. If it were a choice between her presence (something he couldn't stand) and the neighbor's gossip at seeing her leave, he would choose for Sakura to stay.
But now that she was a shinobi (something he despised) and she was growing up to look nothing like him (which was expected), but also less and less like her mother, perhaps he wouldn't mind having the constant reminded of his wife's infidelity out of the house. Sakura actually smiled as she thought up ways of possibly broaching the subject over dinner.
When she arrived at her family's house, her father was already seated in the dining room, sipping on sake. And by the ruddy color in his cheeks he had been for a while. Sakura could hear her mother preparing dinner in the kitchen and moved towards the room.
"Oh, Sakura, you're home," Mebuki said. "Help me bring these dishes out, will you?"
Sakura wordlessly accepted the large platter of fish, wondering if her mother would even bother to ask if she had passed Kakashi-sensei's 'survival training'
Mebuki followed her out of the kitchen with the rest of the plates. Sakura could feel her father's eyes burning into her as she arranged the dishes before taking her seat.
Her mother followed suit and soon the three had descended into a tense silence- the only noises heard was the gentle scrapping of plates. Sakura felt the weight of the uncomfortable atmosphere smother her and she recalled Kakashi-sensei's words. He had wanted Team Seven to be family- but the way she felt around the Harunos was suffocating.
"So, did you pass? Are you a ninja now?" Kizashi suddenly barked, his glassy eyes fixed on her.
Sakura deliberately allowed herself another moment to chew her food, while internally calculating what her father's motives for asking her were.
"Yes," she replied after a moment.
Kizashi's lips twisted in a predictable sneer, but Sakura was more interested in the way her mother had paused, fork half raised for a moment after her answer.
"I suppose you will be needing more money for more weapons now," Kizashi grumbled.
It was something he always fumed about each time a letter from the Academy came home instructing parents to buy practice shruiken or small kunai for their students. But as much as he grumbled, Kizashi would buy her the nicest, most expensive pair, making sure that only she knew how aggravated he was at wasting money on her and a career he despised.
But now that he had brought up money…
"Actually, I will start receiving payment for any missions I go on, so I can buy my own weapons," Sakura said, watching as her father digested her information.
He took another swing of sake and grunted, "As long as you buy the good ones."
Sakura continued nonchalantly, "And if we go on enough missions I will be able to move out of the house soon…"
"Absolutely not," Mebuki firmly stated.
Sakura stared at her mother in wonder. She hadn't considered her mother possibly refusing her request, only thinking her father would be a potential obstacle. Kizashi too was staring at his wife.
Sakura backtracked trying to think of a plausible reason for her mother to approve of this, instead of the arguments she had planned for her father.
"With missions I could be coming and going at all hours of night. I would not want to disturb you or father," Sakura calmly stated, watching as her mother's lips thinned. Her father on the other hand actually looked like he was considering her reasoning.
And while Sakura knew that her mother loved her, she did not know why she was so determined to keep her rooted in such a malicious house. But what the girl hadn't considered was that her mother would go as far as to appeal to her father's reputation to keep her under their roof.
"Sakura you are twelve years old. I don't care how many missions you take, you are not leaving this house at least until you are of age." Mebuki's blue eyes darted over to her husband, "Besides, just think of what the neighbors will think at us letting a little girl live on her own."
Kizashi frowned. And for a brief moment Sakura actually thought that her father and her were on the same page. Because for a moment both of them had thought that they would be rid of each other.
Draining the last of his cup, Kizashi slammed the empty ceramic on the table and his dark eyes met her, "You mother is right. You are staying. You get to be a little leach for at least another four years until it is acceptable for you to leave."
He grimaced and Sakura mirrored the expression. So close…
Calmly setting her fork down, Sakura delicately wiped her lips, trying to cool the raging storm she was feeling inside.
"May I be excused?"
Mebuki nodded, her eyes following her daughter's small form as she rose, tucked her chair in and departed from the room, quiet as a ghost.
Sakura was sorely tempted to slam the door to her bedroom, but she didn't want to consider the verbal and possibly physical lashing she would receive from her father. So instead she flopped down on her bed and closed her eyes, trying to push away the hopeless feeling churning in her gut. She should have never pictured what freedom would be like on her walk home. Because now that she wasn't granted it, it left a bitter feeling in her throat.
Alone she would not have to be constantly reminded that she was only a Haruno by name. That she was an unwanted bastard that never truly belonged to the 'prestigious' Haruno clan. No more sleepless nights wondering if she would be dragged to the basement. No possible chance of seeing Great Uncle Itsuki…
Sakura viciously shook her head and shoved the incident to the back of her mind. She was not going to think about that any more. She was a shinobi- she was strong. Stronger than some perverted old man that had the audacity to think she was easy prey!
Inhaling deeply, Sakura let her eyes close and fell into an easy sleep. Exhaustion from the long and complicated day lulled her into a dreamless sleep.
A/N: Hi everyone, sorry that this took so long. I have had possibly the most stressful week of my life. So thank you for being patient.
Also I didn't get as much feedback on the last chapter as expected, which isn't a bad thing, but I was a little nervous at how you liked/disliked my take on the bell test.
Please continue to read and review.
-Nyx
