Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 8:


"Jane."

I opened my eyes to the darkness, rolling over and mumbling, "What?"

"There's been an accident."

I was starting to wake up more. "What?"

Paul grabbed my arm and started to pull me out of my bed. "A car accident."

My eyes widened, even in my sleepy state. "David? Is he okay?"

"Not David," Paul said to me, handing me my jacket and pulling me towards the door.

I walked outside in my pyjamas, still a little frantic. "Paul, who the hell are we talking about?"

He sighed, opening the door to the car for me. "Just get in."

I got in the back, behind my mother, who was ready to go, and Paul, who was doing up his seatbelt. "What the hell is going on?" I asked loudly - too loudly for the quiet night. Or maybe it was morning.

It was dark. That was all I knew.

My mom glanced at me through the rearview mirror. "Your father's been in an accident."

I didn't know what to think or say, but the first thing that came out was, "Is he dead?"

"No," she answered. "But he's has been greatly injured."

I still didn't know what to think. "Oh." I made myself more comfortable in my seat. "Where are we going?"

"The hospital in Atoka County."

"How far?" Paul asked, letting me know that he had probably just been waken up too. I saw it then in his disheveled hair and pyjamas.

"About two hours," mom said, gripping the wheel nervously.

"Can we sleep?" I asked.

My mom chuckled lightly, catching my eyes in the mirror. "Of course, Jane."

I nodded, laying down in the backseat and sighing heavily. I had napped for about an hour, and when I woke up, we were parked. I sat up to see that we were parked at a gas station. I stretched out before reaching over the front seat and tapping Paul's shoulder. "Paul."

Paul turned around at the first tap. "I'm awake."

I sighed heavily, leaning back into my seat. "Does David know?"

Paul nodded. "Yeah. He said he'd be on the road as fast as he could."

"Do you know what happened?"

Paul gave me a somber look and I wasn't sure it was because he was sad or because the news was sad. "He was driving while he was drunk off his ass."

"I hope the asshole hit a thick tree," I said, only thinking aloud.

"No," Paul said, looking forward again. "He hit another car. A family."

"Oh, shit," I said, eyes widening. "Are they okay?"

"They died."

I didn't understand the world. If everyone was so hellbent on God and his holy powers, why did terrible things happen? And to people who didn't deserve it? Why did assholes get drunk and take other people's lives? If God was the big protecter, why didn't he protect them?

I didn't know what I believed in, but I knew that if anyone deserved to be dead, it was my shitty father.

"Jane?"

My eyes shifted to Paul, looking at him for a solid three seconds. "Why are we even going to see him?"

Paul sighed. "Mom says actually been in the hospital for a week, but he's goin' to jail as soon as he recovers. We probably won't see him for a while."

"Good," I commented, crossing my arms. "It'll be easier to pretend he doesn't exist."

"Jane," Paul said in a warning tone.

"What?" I said incredulously, wondering why he was into defending our dad all of the sudden.

"He could've died."

"Good!"

"He's our dad!"

"He's an asshole!"

Paul shook his head, his yelling ceasing. "Don't you remember all the good times?" He turned as much as he could in his seat to face me. "Don't you remember all those times he used to take us to the park and let us eat all the ice cream we could ever want?" Paul searched my face and continued when I didn't want to talk. "He wasn't always an ass, Janey, and you would be crying like a baby if he was dead."

I knew it was true. I don't know how Paul had gotten so smart so fast, but I knew what he was saying was true.

I huffed, laying back down in the backseat. "What time is it?"

"6 somethin'."

That was when I remember. "How the hell are you gonna make it back for the rumble tonight?"

"I'll catch a ride back with David."

"What, mom's gonna stay the whole damn day?"

"Probably."

"I'll catch a ride with you too, then."

"No, you won't."

I shot up, grabbing his shoulder. "What do you mean I'm not?"

"Mom needs someone, Jane," Paul said seriously, glancing back at me. "He was mighty awful to her, but she stills loves the guy and she's upset about it. She's been trying not to cry the whole damn car ride. She needs someone."

"Fine," I said reluctantly, too tired to argue.

Mom was coming out of the gas station, and she was holding three colas.

Another hour of driving in almost complete silence, the faint humming of the radio in the background, we had reached the hospital.

We walked inside, my mom a strong leader, my brother and I slowly trailing behind. She asked for dad's name and we got the room number. Again, she strode in long, wanting strides while my brother and I slowly walked behind her.

We saw her duck into a room and Paul said to me, "Be nice."

"I will," I promised.

I walked inside and my dad was lying on a white hospital bed. His hair wasn't gelled back neatly and his face looked like it hadn't been shaven in a little while. His eyes has huge bags under them and he had a couple of cuts spread out on his sagging face.

He looked awful.

He smiled once he saw the three of us. "Hey."

Mom walked up to him, standing near him but not that close. "Hi, Richard."

Dad looked at Paul. "Pauly, boy, lookin' good."

Paul nodded. "Thanks, dad."

Then dad looked at me. "Jane." He sighed, looking me up and down. "You look the exact same." And then he laughed. "Been getting into some fights?"

I didn't touch my healing cut. I just nodded. "Yeah."

"That's my girl," he said, trying to pretend that we were friends.

The three of us stood around awkwardly until a nurse came in with a tray of decent-looking food. She set the tray down with a smile and then left the room quickly.

"Everyone's been so nice here," dad said, reaching for his pudding cup.

He looked worse, but he seemed so different. Maybe it was just the fact that I had never really seen him not totally pissed.

"How do you feel?" mom asked.

Dad shrugged, offering up another stupid smile. "I feel all right, you know. I've had better days." He looked at the three of us before he picked up his spoon, and then he sighed and set his food down. "I know I've made a lot of mistakes. But this experience has changed me."

"How?" Paul asked quickly, not falling for it as quickly as my mother seemed to be.

Dad looked serious and so...awake and not drunk. It was still so weird. He looked Paul in the eyes, switching between him, me and mom for what he said next. "I've taken lives because of my drinking problem. I've taken away a family from this world because of something I did." He sighed, shaking his head at himself. "The drinking needs to stop. It makes me someone I don't like anymore."

"Bullshit," I said, seeing through every little word he spouted, and Paul put an arm out in front of me.

"Jane!" mom gasped.

I looked at her. "You honestly believe he's going to be a better person? You know how he is!"

"People can change," my father said.

I turned to his, my face hot from my anger. "You killed innocent people! You've hit me and Paul and David more times than I can count!" I pushed Paul's arm away, advancing toward him. "That little realization speech doesn't automatically make up for all the shit you've done." I snarled, wanting to spit in his face. "I can't remember the last time I loved you and thought of you as family because I've always despised you!"

"Jane!" my mother was yelling. "That's enough!"

"I hate you!" I screamed at his stupid face. "I hate you!"

Paul wrapped his arms around me, pulling me out of the room faster than I could blink, right into the middle of the hallway. I instantly started to cry, my knees failing me as I sobbed painfully.

"Hey, you're okay," Paul said softly to me, wrapping his arms tighter around me. "You're fine." He dragged me over to the seats against the wall, sitting both of us down.

I was barely making any sound. My chest was hurting too much. I wasn't taking in enough air to even breathe, and I could barely say, "I hate him."

"I know you do." Paul patted my back, his hand too rough and cold to be comforting, looking down at my reddened face. "Why don't you go to the cafeteria, huh?"

I tried to calm myself down, breathing deeply and rubbing my face dry. "Okay." I looked over at him. "Can I make a call?"

Paul searched his pockets, scraping enough change for one call. "It's all I got, Janey."

I took it graciously, standing quickly. "Thanks." I walked around him and went straight for the door to the outside. I walked toward the payphone, picking it up and hesitating a the change sat in front of the slot it was supposed to go in.

Who was I going to call? What exactly was my plan here?

I pushed the change inside, dialling the number and waiting as I heard it ringing.

"Hello?"

It was clearly not who I wanted. "Is Ponyboy there?"

"One sec." I waited for exactly seven seconds before the phone muffled and then someone breathed into it. "Hello?"

"Pony?" I said, my voice cracking. "It's Jane."

"Are you okay?"

I leaned against the payphone, wiping my eyes again. "I'm in Atoka County," I said, breathing deeply in between. "My dad got in an accident."

"Oh, wow," Pony said in his sweet voice. "Is he okay?"

I sobbed, clutching the phone. "I should want him to be dead." I took a deep breath in to calm myself down, but I only ended up crying more. "I should want him to be dead for everything he's done to me - to my mom - to my brothers." I shut my eyes tightly, waiting for his calming voice.

"Jane," he said, his warm voice like a nice hug. "It's normal to feel the way you do. Yeah, he's an ass, but he's still your dad. He's the person you taught you how to ride a bike, raised you - your dad is special to you no matter what."

I was breathing a little better. "He says he changed and I don't believe a damn word he says." I sniffled, my voice more steady as I went on to explain. "He was driving drunk and he hit another car and they died. He says its turned him around and my mom is buying in to his bullshit."

"And you think he's lying?"

"Yes."

"Then go with your gut. You don't have to believe him if you don't want."

"What the hell am I supposed to do here?"

"Go to the cafeteria and stay there."

I nodded, though Pony obviously couldn't see me. "Okay." I sighed heavily, shifted on my feet and looking down at the ground. "You ready for the rumble tonight?"

"As ready as I could ever be," Pony said, seeming to sigh. "All the boys are pumped. They're just excited to whoop some Tiger ass."

I smiled, finding the idea of Pony whooping ass a little ridiculous. "Don't get to roughed up now you hear."

"Me? Never."

"Alright, well, I've got to go. Hey, Pony -" I started to say, figuring it was too late to go back now, so I'd might as well say it. "Thank you. I knew I could count on your call."

Pony laughed lightly on the other end. "Don't go all soft on me."

"Oh, shut up." I laughed, stepping close to the phone booth. "Goodbye."

"Bye."

I hung up the phone, walking back inside, past dad's room and straight to the cafeteria. I would eat some food and stay away from the huge asshole.


David had showed up and stopped by the room. I don't know what he said or what he did, but he went in alone and then came out five minutes later with Paul, walking toward the door.

When I had caught up with them, I already knew what David was gonna say.

"Hey -" I caught David's arm. "Where are you guys goin'?"

"We're leaving," David said quickly.

"So soon?"

David sighed, looking down at me. "He deserves much worse than what he got, Jane, and though I don't encourage bad behaviour, I'm glad you got it all out."

I looked at Paul, glaring a little. "Did you tell him everything?" Paul nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets and I looked back at David. "I'm sorry I lashed out, but I still want nothing to do with him."

David looked at me, not how Paul was earlier. "And that's okay, Jane. Just because he's injured, doesn't mean we gotta feel bad for him." He hesitated before taking a step toward me and hugged me. "I'm proud of you, kid and I love your dumbass."

I smiled, hugging him back. "I love you too."

"Oh, yeah, love you guys too."

I laughed as David brought Paul into the hug, squeezing both of us tightly.

But they still left without me, and I went back to the cafeteria until it was starting to get a little bit dark.

That was when my mom came out of the room and sat down across from me at the table, sighing quaintly. "How are you doing out here?"

"I'm fine," I said quietly, not looking at her. "Can we go now?"

"Yes."

I looked up at her. "Really?"

She nodded and I notice that her eyes were red and puffy, like she has been crying. "Yes."

We both stood and we walked silently to the car. A minute in, I couldn't take the silence any longer. "What happened?"

Mom grabbed the wheel and turned it sharply, pulling away from the hospital. "He told me that he changed. He said he was going to stop drinking. He promised me that he was going to be the man I fell in love with and the father that he used to be."

I shook my head. "Mom, you don't really believe -"

"And I told him I wanted a divorce."

My heart stopped. "What?"

Mom only looked forward, but I could see her swallow back her sadness. "I told him -" Her voice shook. "That I want a divorce. I don't want him in the house or around my kids anymore." A tear fell down her cheek and she gripped the wheel.

"Mom," I said consolingly, scooting across the seat to be closer.

She cried. "I know it hurts you to be around him. I know you hate him, Jane, and I don't blame you. I see that way David looks at him, like he wants to kill him." She sobbed, almost identical to how I was hours ago. "I can't let him into our lives because I know what kind of person he is. He's never going to change."

Wow.

I didn't know what to say. I was almost ecstatic, but I was too shocked to realize it. I knew David wouldn't care in the least and he would be overjoyed. But Paul was the one I was concerned about. Paul got hurt the least out of all of us and he still cared about dad out of all of us. Mom loved him, but she knew better. I'm sure Paul did too, but Paul was always the worst at letting things go, and it would take a while to let dad go.

I came back to my mother swerving on the road. I grabbed the wheel. "Mom!"

"I'm fine," she insisted, taking the wheel back and wiping her eyes.

I sighed, scooting close enough that our thighs were touching and I leaned my head on her shoulder. "Thank you," I said to her, staring out at the road ahead of us. "Thank you."

We drove in silence, no radio. Mom had stopped crying within ten minutes and we drove back without saying anything. We drove all the way back to Tulsa in the dark and I knew that at that moment, the rumble was happing.

Every time my mother tapped the brakes or turned the wheel, someone was getting punched in the face, losing a tooth, breaking a hand, getting kneed in the stomach. There would be yelling and there would be blood and I hoped that everyone was okay.

David wouldn't have any trouble, that I knew. Paul was grown enough to take care of himself. I was sure Pony would be fine because he had the smarts for it. And Tim. From what I heard, Tim was unbeatable in a rumble. He was probably getting his nose broken all over again, but he would be fine in the end.

When we got home, I told my mom that she should go to bed and that I was going to walk over to the Curtis's. She listened and I started to walk.

I sat on the Curtis's front porch until I saw a group of rowdy boys run up to the house, each one bloodied differently, all smiling widely. They all ran past me, only Pony taking a seat beside me.

"Hey, Jane."

I smiled, reaching out and wiping some blood from his forehead. "You won I take it?"

"We sure as hell did."

I stood, still smiling. "Well, I just wanted to make sure you were all right."

Pony stood too, nodding to his door. "You wanna come in for a cola or somethin'?"

I shook my head, stepping closer and hugging him quickly. "I'm glad you're okay."

Pony hugged me back and I started to walk away from the house, stopping when he called out, "How'd things go today?"

I turned around, walking backward as I said, "My mom's gettin' a divorce," I said, knowing that I was smiling just as wide, like I had won the rumble too.

Pony cheered, being very unlike his quieter self. "Woo! That's what I'm talkin' about!"

I laughed loudly, watching his messy hair blow in the wind, his strong arms raised in the air and his attractive face smiling at me. The sweet kid damn near changed my whole life when he became my friend - my best friend. I felt the love fill up inside of me, and I cheered too. "Woo!"

Pony laughed just as loud, throwing his head back. When it whipped back up, he gave me a wave. "Now get off my property, King! We don't owe you now favours no more!"

I saluted him. "You've got it, Curtis!" I spun around and ran off, thankful that Pony seemed almost completely okay. I ran and then walked the rest of the way to the Shepard's household.

Curly was lying down across the third porch step, holding a cloth to his nose.

"How you doin', Curly?"

Curly groaned as he leaned up, his eye purple as it followed me as I walked closer. He smiled under the cloth. "Hey, Janey. I'm great."

I sat down beside him, examining his face. "Did you break it?"

"I don't know. You tell me." Curly took away to cloth to a clearly broken nose.

I cringed. "Yeah, you broke it."

Curly only laughed. "Oh, yeah, baby." He held out his hand. "Give me some."

I shook my head as I high-fived him. "Is Tim home?"

Curly nodded to the door. "He's inside."

I stood, patting his knee as I walked past him. "Nice job, Curly." I walked inside the house and I started toward the bathroom, where I could hear the tap running. "Tim?"

Tim came out of the bathroom, blood around his mouth. "Hey, kid." He disappeared back into the bathroom.

I walked inside, watching his cleaning up his face, washing away the blood that I had previously seen. "I heard you won."

"We sure as hell did."

I walked closer, running my hand over his back. "Are you okay?"

He leaned up, drying his face and tossing the town into the tub. "I'm good." He leaned down, pecking my cheek and walked around me to go to his room. "Where were you all day?"

I sighed, falling onto his bed as he shut the door. "My dad got into an accident, so we went over to Atoka County Hospital to see him."

"Oh, shit," Tim said, pulling his bloody shirt over his head. "Is he all right?"

"He'll be fine," I told him. "He's goin' to jail as soon as he's good enough."

Tim watched me carefully, probably deciding based on my facial expression what to say, and then he said, "Huh. For how long?"

"Don't know," I said honestly, laying down on the soft bed. "I don't care. My mom's divorcing him, finally."

Tim nodded, pulling down down his pants to reveal his white underwear. "That's good." He walked over to the bed, laying on top of it. He looked me over. "You okay, kid?"

I nodded, wondering how Tim could be so simple about things, yet so comforting. He must've sensed that I didn't really want to talk about it because he didn't question me further.

Tim just put his arm under my body and pulled me into him. "You stayin' over?" I felt his lips on my head and he sighed into my hair. "Cause I'm gonna pass out right now."

I smiled as I wrapped my arm around him. "I can't." I didn't want to, but I didn't want to leave my mom alone and I wanted to see Paul after todays news. "But you wanna go out tomorrow?"

"I'll pick you up after work. How's that sound?"

"Great." I pulled away from his embrace a little to kiss him. When I leaned away, I touched his cut up lip gently. "Did you kick some ass, baby?"

Tim smiled and I could feel his fingers on my back. "Yes, ma'am." His smile softened and he kept looking at me. "I kicked Ray's pansy ass in front of all his buddies."

I was filled with unexpected joy. "Good." I kissed him slowly and softly once more before I quickly rolled off the bed, adjusting my jacket on my body. "Call me tomorrow."

Tim sighed, rolling fully onto his back and closing his eyes. "Sure, kid."

I watched his beautiful form slowly drift into sleep as his chest rose up and down. "Goodnight." I didn't hear him respond as I closed the door behind me.

I was out of that house and back at mine at a decent pace. I sort of took my time, but I when I saw my porch, I ran the rest of the way to my place. I jogged inside, almost running right past Paul on the couch.

Paul look up at me, one of his eyes purple and more closed than the other. "Hey."

I walked over to him, sitting down beside him on the uncomfortable couch. "How'd it go?"

"We won."

"I heard."

"Yeah." Paul put the icepack to his eye again, cringing a little at the impact. "I stick by me saying Ray's a candyass."

I laughed. "Remember when you caught me going out to see him?"

"Which damn time?" Paul asked, sounding annoyed, but he was smiling.

I nudged his shoulder as best I could while I was sunken into the couch. "Hey, I've grown."

"Because Tim's better."

"Oh, whatever," I said back, not having a good comeback at that moment.

Paul was quiet for a couple of seconds before saying, "Mom's gettin' a divorce."

"I know." I looked at him. "You all right?"

That question was circling so much throughout the day, but every single person who was asked and asked it need that question more than anything.

Paul just turned to me. "He's gonna be gone, Jane. We're probably never gonna see him again - not even when he gets out of jail."

"I know," I said, watching the future work its way through his mind carefully. "You good?"

Paul then nodded, surprising me. "We've got mom. And we've got David." He looked at me, icepack still at his eye. "And I've got you. I don't need that asshole."

I immediately started to smile, breaking eye contact and leaning my head against his strong shoulder. "You know, you're actually a smart guy."

"Hey, thanks, Janey."

"You're welcome, Paul."

"Am I your favourite brother now?"

I smiled. "Maybe."