Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'
Chapter 13:
"Jane!"
My head popped up and I sighed when I saw Ray standing at the end of the bed. I wrapped the covers around me tightly, pressing my head back down on the pillow. "What?"
"I'm going out. You comin' or not?"
"Not."
"Well, we're goin' out tonight, so be ready by then."
I nodded lightly, eyes closed. "Okay."
It had been two days since the incident, and I hadn't left Ray's shitty apartment in that time. I came to his apartment, got back together with him and then crawled into his bed. I hadn't gotten out of it yet. I hadn't been to work and I realized that I probably just lost my job. I also hadn't went to school and I also realized I just ruined any chance I had at getting an A in chemistry.
But I was going to.
I threw the covers off of me, feeling the ache of my body as I walked to Ray's closet. I grabbed one of his flannels, slipping it on and starting towards the door. I left the apartment and walked a little down into the first floor, where the only phone in the whole building was.
I picked it up and dialled my home number, hoping for anyone but my mother.
"Hello?"
"It's me."
"Jesus, Janey, are you nuts?!" Paul didn't sound glad to hear from me. "I had to hear from Pony that you got up and left the hospital. How was I supposed to know if you were dead or not? Why didn't you call? Why didn't you tell me?" I didn't get a chance to answer, as Paul started asking more questions. "Where did you go? Where are you now? I'll come get you."
"I'm nowhere," I told him, not sure what even I was thinking at that point. "But I might be here for a while."
"Who are you with?"
"Why does it matter?"
"It's not Tim. He came by looking for you."
I perked up, gripping the phone tightly. "He did. What did he say?"
"Says you said some dumb shit and he needs some explainin'."
I held back everything I wanted to say, instead I said, "Next time you see him tell him that I meant what I said and he won't be seeing any of me anymore."
"What, you guys done?"
I sighed sadly. "Yeah."
"What'd he do?" Paul asked, and I was sure his face was turning red.
"Nothin'," I said defensively.
"What'd you do?"
I shook my head, rubbing my face as I temporarily took the phone away from me. I put the phone back against my ear, ready for the conversation to be over. "Just tell mom that I'm really upset over this breakup and I need to support of my friends."
"What friends?"
I wanted to smack him. "Fine. Friend, singular. Tell her I'm at Pony's."
"When you comin' home?"
"Maybe in a couple days," I said, really talking out my ass.
"Fine." Paul sighed on the other line. "Call me soon, okay?"
"Okay."
"Bye."
I hung up, walking back up the stairs and starting to get actually ready to go out. I managed to brush my hair and tuck one of Ray's tightest shirts into my tight jeans. I looked fine, I thought.
Ray's face when he saw me told me he wasn't impressed, but he didn't make an effort to tell me. He just put his arm around me and took me to his car, where we drove to a new bar in town.
I missed Bucks.
The new bar's lighting was red and the space was spacious. It did have a pool table, though. It was alright. It was just a place where they didn't have to deal with any other gangs probably.
I had to walk around with Ray's arm around me, hand on my butt. I had to smile at all the people he introduced me to and act like I was really enjoying myself. But by the time we got to the seventh person, I was tired.
"...And this is my girl. Jane, this is Joey."
I nodded to him unenthusiastically. "Hey."
Ray laughed, smacking my backside. "She's a little tired from earlier. You wanna go home, baby?"
I almost started smiling at him. "Yeah."
Ray smirked, smacking my backside again. "Then go home. And put some beer in the fridge for later."
I turned away from him, walking out onto the street, angrily kicking a nearby pebble. I groaned loudly, turning and kicking the wall of the building. I had just been so angry lately.
I walked to the nearest group of boys. They were younger than I was - probably sixteen or fifteen. I reached them, looking over all of them. "You guys got a cigarette?"
The shortest one smirked. "If you lift up your shirt, we'll give you one."
I narrowed my eyes at him, taking a step closer. "You'll give me one either way." I looked down at him, pushing him by the chest. "Now."
He chuckled to his friends, trying to seem tough, but he took out a pack of cigarettes and gave me one. "There you go, sweetheart."
I grabbed it, letting him light it. I took a puff, feeling my body instantly relax and I hadn't realized how much I missed them. I smiled, looking over at the shortest one again. "Thank you." I turned around, walking off down the street.
I made it back to the apartment alive, still savouring my one and only cigarette, though I was sure I would find a couple packs in Ray's apartment. I did and I started smoking one, lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling.
I wondered how Curly was doing. I wondered where Tim was.
I finished my other cigarette and I searched around for more, misplacing the pack somewhere in the room. I opened up Ray's bedside table, seeing a pack of expertly rolled joints. I stared at them for a couple of seconds before I opened it up, taking one out and putting it in my mouth. I lit it with a barely working lighter and took a long drag.
Last time I smoked a joint was when I was fourteen, and I had only managed to get in two puffs before Paul saw me and pushed me around. He yelled at me that what was his was his and not mine.
I smiled at the memory, lying back down on the bed. I smoked the whole thing - and then another one and the the last one.
Time floated by, just as I was floating all over the room. I felt hot and happy and hungry. The clock read 3 in the morning before I knew it and I sleeping off a high I very much enjoyed.
"Jane!"
My head popped up and I sighed when I saw Ray standing at the end of the bed. I got a sense of deja-vu as I wrapped the covers around me tightly, pressing my head back down on the pillow. "What?"
"Get up!" Ray threw the covers off of me, grabbing one of my ankles and yanking me off the bed.
I seethed as I hit the wood. I looked up at him from the ground. "What the fuck do you want?"
Ray pointed an angry finger at me. "You're my girl now, alright? So act like it."
My brows furrowed, looking him in his glazed over eyes. "Jesus, you're wired, aren't you?"
He grabbed the front of my shirt, yanking me up, pressing his nose against mine. "That's none of your damn business."
I clawed at his face defensively, feeling his grip getting tighter., and he let go. "Don't touch me," I snarled, taking a step back.
Ray's big hand came up before I even knew it and he smacked me hard across my face. When I fell to the ground, he leaned down and put his blade against my cheek. "You want to scratch me, huh?" He pushed the blade down, sliding it about an inch across my cheek.
I determined not the scream, pressed my lips together hard until it was over. Then I groaned loudly, touching my cheek to get a bunch of blood on my fingers. I ignored the stung and I stood, not grabbing anything as I walked to the door.
"Where the hell do you think you're going?"
I didn't answer, slamming the door behind me.
I walked up to the front desk. "Uh, Curly Shepard?"
"Oh, yes, it's -" She looked up and gasped. "Oh, my goodness! Are you alright?"
"What?" I asked, a little confused. And then it clicked and I gestured to my face. "Oh, no, it's just that tag football gets a little rough with my brothers."
She hesitated before nodding. "Alright. Curly Shepard is in room 104."
"Thank you," I said, walking past her and down the hallway until I reached the room. I reached for the doorknob and opened it as quietly as I could. I peeked in to see if Tim was there, but Pony was instead. "Hey," I said, walking inside and closing the door behind me.
Pony stared at Curly. "Hey." He was sitting in a chair beside Curly's bed and Curly was sleeping.
"How is he doing?"
The bandage was still on his nose and his hair was still crazily messy. His arm was now is a cast and there were tubes coming from different places on his body.
Pony sighed. "He's gonna live, but that arm of his is gonna be broken for a long time and that nose too. They say it's a literal miracle he didn't have worse."
I nodded, grabbing a chair and setting up beside him. I sat down, glancing at the book in his lap. "Homework?"
"Not that you would know," Pony said bitterly. "You haven't been at school in days. Where have you -" His gaze had shifted to me a second ago and he took it to register what he was seeing. "Jesus, Jane!" He reached out and took my chin between his fingers, turning to my face side to side. "What happened?"
I winced, his finger on a small bruise on my chin. I looked him in his searching eyes and I didn't speak until he looked in mine. "I got back together with Ray."
Pony let go of me, shaking his head. "Why the hell would you do that?"
I shrugged. "I love him."
"No, you don't."
I stood, not feeling like I could even begin to explain with my amount of energy. "I don't have to explain myself to you."
Pony grabbed my arm to stop me. "Jane, you're doing this for some reason. Tell me what it is." His eyes widened. "You got back with him to stop him from doing anything else. Jane, you don't have to do that. Tim can handle it."
I sighed, shaking him off gently. "Just don't tell anyone right now," I said, stepping closer and wrapping my arms around him. "Let me figure it out, okay?"
Pony hugged me back. "You really think you have to do this?"
"Yes."
He grabbed my arms, pulling me away from him to look me in the eyes. "Take care of yourself, Jane."
I nodded, kissing his cheek before walking into the hallway. I glanced down the hall before I turned to walk towards the door. I looked back quickly when I noticed that Tim was at the very end of the hallway, looking down at two huge cinnamon rolls. I bolted it out of there, not hearing any yelling from behind me.
I had made it out without Tim seeing me.
I sighed in relief, walking down the street, missing the turn to Ray's. I was gonna go home to get my stuff first.
I made it there, walking inside. The lights were out and no one seemed to be home, so I took my time packing my stuff up. I didn't take everything of course, but I got the clothes I wore the most and a couple of things just for me to do, plus my pillow.
I walked out of the house within the hour, bag slung over my shoulder, pillow under my arm. I made it to Ray's not quickly at all, opening the door and heading up the stairs. When I made it to Ray's door, I hesitated and pressed my ear against the door. I could hear him shuffling around inside.
I opened the door and walked inside, tossing my bag on the floor and my pillow on the bed. I started taking off my clothes to put my pyjamas on, not looking at Ray quite yet.
"Jane."
I looked up at him while pulling my pants on. "What?"
He was sitting in a chair at the dining room table not too far away. "I didn't mean to hit you that hard, but you shouldn't provoke me."
I nodded, pulling my shirt over my head. "Okay."
"Okay." Ray stood, walking over to me and putting his hands on my hips. He pulled me to face him, looking my face over. "You should start wearing makeup."
I ignored that comment, instead asking, "When did you get into drugs?"
Ray touched my face casually, as if we were talking about our days. "About a year ago."
"While we were seeing each other?"
"Just after."
"Just weed?"
Ray shrugged. "Blow sometimes."
"Jesus."
"It is what it is." He chuckled, kissing my cheek sensually. His arms came around me and his wet lips made way to my neck.
Though I wasn't in the mood - not that I ever was with Ray, I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Are you gonna give me rides to school?"
"What do you think?"
"Just thought I'd ask."
"Well, stop talking," Ray muttered, pushing me down on the bed.
