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Chapter 41 "The Funeral, The Sickness and Severus' Return"

Lily stared at the ground, raindrops coating the grass under her feet in the cemetery. The minister was speaking, but his words went right threw her; she couldn't take in anything he was saying. Her eyes were drawn to the twin coffins beside the side by side graves. Lily looked over at Petunia, who was dressed all in black, including a thick veil that covered her face. Vernon was next to her, his large size making her look tiny. He had an arm around Petunia' shoulders as they shook, and Lily knew she was crying beneath that veil. Vernon bent his head and whispered in her ear, and she threw her arms around his neck, pressing her veil covered face into his chest.

Lily clasped her hands together, squeezing them tightly in her lap, and bit her lip. She tried to focus on the people attending the funeral; there were many, as her parents had a lot of friends. There were no wizards here, except for her, and no magic of any sort. It was a full muggle funeral, and that made Lily happy for some reason.

She stared hard at a rather plump woman, taking in the horrible flowery pattern on her dress, but again the well-made wooden coffins pulled her attention.

The minister said some more words and then bowed his head in prayer before gesturing that they could stand and leave.

Lily remained seated for a moment, afraid her legs would turn to jelly if she stood. Someone touched her shoulder, and she looked around, expecting to see Petunia, but it was Remus. He was dressed rather nicely for once, in muggle attire; a crisp looking black suit. Lily wondered if he bought it just for this dreary occasion.

"Hey. I wanted to make sure you were okay." He said, taking the seat next to her. "I would have come earlier, but I had to go see Dumbledore. I let him know everything that happened, my mission and all."

Lily nodded silently, and he gazed at her with sympathy.

"Lily, I wish I could make this easier for you, but there's no way I can." he reached out and squeezed her clasped hands tightly.

"I need to go home." Lily said hoarsely, standing up.

Remus looked worried as Lily swayed slightly and jumped up next to her, a hand on her forearm to steady her. Lily leaned into Remus, letting him support her. His hand snaked around her waist as she gave up control of her body and let him lead the way.

"Lily!" someone called.

Lily turned her head; it was her sister. Petunia walked quickly up to them, Vernon following in her wake. He nodded to Lily in greeting and raised his eyes at Remus, who said quickly, "I'm Remus, a friend of Lily's."

"It was a beautiful ceremony, don't you think?" Petunia questioned her sister, and Lily nodded. Petunia studied her sister closely with a worried glance when she didn't speak. " "Lily, you don't look well. You need to go home and lay down right away. But call me if you need anything, okay?"

Lily nodded slightly to show she understood, and Petunia traded a quick glance with Remus, who mouthed "I'll take care of her."

Petunia gave Lily a kiss on the cheek before pulling Vernon away so they could talk with the others who had attended the funeral.

Lily tugged on Remus' arm and he took that as a hint to leave. After looking around surreptitiously to make sure no muggles were watching, he turned on the spot and they reappeared in front of the potions' shop. Lily immediately collapsed in Remus' arms and he tapped her face gently with a hand.

"Lily, are you alright? Talk to me."

Lily looked up into his worried eyes as tears fell from her own. He quickly hoisted her up, carrying her in his arms, and brought her inside to her bedroom.

"Stay," she whispered when he made to leave. He sat up in the bed beside her, throwing the covers over them both. Lily snuggled into his chest, but was silent. Remus began stroking her hair in an attempt to comfort her. It was unnerving that she was so quiet. He touched her cheek and found it was chilled.

"Lily, look at me."

When she didn't lift her head, he gripped her gently under the chin and raised her head. Her eyes looked distant and glassy and her cheeks were pale.

"Do you feel okay?" Remus said, frowning as she began shivering now. Lily was silent, and Remus' heart dropped. was she in shock? Did she contract some kind of sickness somehow?

"I'm bringing you to Saint Mungo's right now." Remus leapt out the bed and went around to her side, sliding his arms underneath her back and legs and lifting her up gently. Her eyes widened as she spotted something on the bedside table. She reached for the object; it was her calender that told her when Severus would be coming home. She could see today's date circled as his return. Her fingers brushed the edge of the calender and it fell o the floor.

"Remus, Sev.." she said faintly, feeling herself losing consciousness.

"What?" Remus was already halfway to the bedroom door, too engrossed with getting Lily help to notice that she had been grabbing for the calender.

"Sev..." Lily repeated before she felt herself slip away.

"Lily!" Remus looked down as Lily's head lolled back. He quickly checked her pulse; she was still breathing, but she was so cold.

"Just hold on." he turned on the spot, which was a bit difficult with Lily in his arms, and Disapparated.

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The sun was way too bright, but it warmed Severus' slight frame as he stood under its welcome rays. He had been escorted back to the Ministry by two wizards, and back to that horrible room that they had used to transport him to Azkaban. Everything seemed like it took forever; all he could think about was being free and away from the dementors. He hardly paid attention as the wizards led him threw the corridors of the Ministry, into the elevator and then through the Atrium to the fireplaces and Apparation areas. After giving him back his wand and discharge papers, the guards finally released him. He stuffed the papers into his pocket, but took his wand gently, fingering it with love. It had seemed like forever since he had held it in his hands. The guards had told told him to move along, that he was not allowed to stand there clogging up the Atrium all day, so now he was standing right outside the Ministry, practically drinking in the sun.

He was slightly disappointed, as he expected to find Lily waiting for him, ready to jump into his arms, but she was nowhere to be seen. Perhaps she wasn't sure what time would be released. He would go home and clean himself up a bit before going to see her at work at the hospital or with her parents.

His heart soared at the thought of seeing Lily again. His angel, the love of his life. She was the light that had helped him through these last few months.

A thought stabbed at the back of his mind as he thought about Lily, something that he had forgotten about until now.

Lily's pregnancy. The baby. James' spawn. He swallowed hard. Surely by now Lily would have decided what she was going to do, and he would just have to wait and see what her decision was.

He began walking and noticed stares coming his way, people watching him with wide eyes. He knew he was a sight for sore eyes; his extremely scrawny frame coupled with his filthiness made him look like a walking skeleton, or a zombie rather. Avoiding the stares, he walked on, growing tired quickly as he hadn't been getting much exercise in the past three months.

A dark alley drew his eyes; a perfect place to Disapparate away from prying muggle eyes. He ducked into the alley and quickly turned on the spot, appearing in front of his shop. A wide grin broke over his face at the familiar sight, and he laughed out loud and just stopped himself from dancing on the spot. His face hurt from grinning; he hadn't cracked so much as a smile during his time in prison. He practically-dare he say it- skipped to the door, feeling like a child again. Tapping the door with his wand to unlock it, he pushed it open and stepped over the threshold.

Immediately Severus noticed that things were neater and cleaner instead of having three months worth of dust covering everything. The only person he could think that would come here was Lily; there was nobody else. Holding his wand out in front of him, just in case, Severus proceeded cautiously.

"Lumous," he whispered and the wand's tip lit up to form a path of light in front of him.

Going up the stairs to his apartment proved harder then he thought; he was soon out of breath from climbing the stairs, and clutched his chest, wheezing like an old man. Azkaban had taken his fit body and disposed of it, leaving him with this shriveled carcass, which made any physical activity difficult now.

His apartment door was ajar; it looks like someone had been in a hurry and left it open. One step over the threshold and Severus knew something was different, he didn't even need to look around first.

"Lily?" he called quietly. "Are you here?" he flicked his wand and the lights came on, revealing his apartment, which looked pretty much the same except for the couch. A few shabby boxes sat next to it, clothes peeking out of the nearest one. A blanket was folded neatly on the couch, lying on top of an extra pillow.

Severus frowned as he pulled a piece of clothing out of the box; it was a pair of men's robes, and they were not his. The robes slipped from his hand to the floor as he contemplated this development. What exactly was going on here?

He stepped into his bedroom. Unlike the rest of his home, this room was completely changed. Articles of women's clothing were flung here and there and there was some makeup and other things that were definitely not his on the dresser mingled with his possessions. The covers on the bed were hastily thrown back, indicating again that someone left in a hurry.

Severus noticed a photo attached to the wall beside the bed. Stepping closer to see what is was, he smiled as he realized it was a picture of him and Lily as children. He fingered the edge of the photo, remembering that day.

After several minutes lost in a world of memories that were so much different from the present, he tore his eyes from the photo to finish his scan of the room. A pair of his robes laid on top of the bed neatly folded, but extremely wrinkled. He picked them up, smoothing the wrinkles with his hands, and caught a scent of Lily's perfume coming from them.

He pondered everything he had seen as he fingered the robes. Obviously Lily had moved in. Not that he minded, but it was just strange to think about..a woman living in his house. Why had she moved in was the question he wanted answered. Wouldn't it have been better for her to stay with her family instead of alone in a dusty shop?

A small flat object on the floor caught Severus' attention and he put the robes down so he could pick it up. It was a pocket calender. The pages were ripped off so that it showed the current month. Todays's date was circled several times with red, and each day before that was crossed out. It was Lily's countdown to when he was coming home.

A strong desire to see Lily suddenly ripped through him, causing his heart to twinge. He needed to see her right now. Severus placed the calender carefully on the bedside table and considered his next move.

He wasn't sure what days she was working at the hospital, so he would check her house first. Perhaps she had gone to visit her parents. If not, he would go to the hospital. Not even bothering to leave the room to Disapparate as he was so eager to see Lily, Severus spun on the spot, reappearing in front of Lily's house. Except it wasn't a house anymore.

Severus paled and felt weak as he stared at the charred remains of Lily's home before he noticed that the other houses on the block looked the same. It looked as if a wildfire had come through here, followed by a tornado. The whole street was trashed, piles of garbage lying on the singed lawns. What had happened while he was gone? Was Lily even still.. no, he couldn't think about that. Of course she was fine, he would be seeing her soon.

Now there was a bubble of uneasiness in the pit of his stomach, settling there to constantly remind him that something was very wrong. He turned on spot, heading for Saint Mungo's, eager to get as much distance between himself and those burned houses as he could.

The waiting room at the hospital was full to the brink, patients squawking, burping and moaning loudly as they waited to be called. Severus joined the back of the queue that led to the information desk. The woman in front of him was oozing some purple liquid from her ears and panting loudly, and Severus had to hold his breath because the smell that was coming from her was making him nauseas.

After what seemed forever, the line inched forward a little and the wizard the receptionist had been talking to found a seat among all of the other sick patients.

Severus sighed and shifted impatiently. At this rate it was going to take forever.

"Mr. Hadley." A female Healer came out of the swinging doors and called the next patient. An elderly man struggled to get up out of his seat, having a hard time because his legs had turned into carrots.

"What was it this time?" the Healer said kindly to the old man as she took his arm to escort him into the back. "Another spell gone wrong?"

"No, my darned wife." Mr. Hadley scowled. "She got mad because I didn't like what she cooked for dinner."

The Healer chuckled. "Well, we'll get you fixed up."

Severus darted quickly out of line and up to the Healer before she could disappear into the back.

"Excuse me," he said tapping her on the shoulder and she turned.

"I'm sorry sir, but I'm busy. Any questions you might have can be answered by Mildred." the Healer pointed to the receptionist.

"No, I'm looking for Lily Evans. She's a Healer here. Is she working today?"

The Healer's face fell. "She came in a little while ago, but she's very sick. I know her personally, she's such a good girl;

it's a pity, really."

Severus' heart dropped at her words and he gripped her shoulder so tightly that she winced. "Where is she? Tell me now!"

The Healer looked alarmed at his terrified, frantic tone and replied hastily, "Second floor...Room 567."

Severus pushed past the Healer, ignoring her confused stare, and practically ran down the corridors, pushing patients and Healers aside in his haste to reach Lily. He finally got to the second floor and searched the gold numbers next to the doors for her room. 543...549...556...560...567. There it was. The door was closed and there were no sounds coming from the inside.

Severus turned the knob slowly, fearing the worst, a small part of him wishing that he hadn't come here. He stepped inside the dim room, closing the door behind him. There were two beds here, one empty, the other one with a curtain drawn around it.

A sudden sound of someone pulling a chair across the floor made Severus jump, and he realized there was someone with Lily already. Her parents? Her sister? Kingsley, maybe? He drew closer, curious now.

"It's okay. Lily. You're gonna be fine." a male voice said, and Severus could distinguish the worry and caring in those words. But it was not Kingsley and the voice was too young to be Lily's father.

Reaching his hand out slowly, he tugged on the curtain, pulling it back. The man by Lily's bed didn't even notice that he was there, he simply continued to stroke Lily's hair.

A burning fury rose inside Severus as he watched this man leaning over the unconscious Lily and whispering soothing words to her.

Severus must have made a noise or moved or something to attract the man's attention, because he glanced up suddenly and his eyes widened at the sight of Severus. He jumped away from Lily and stood up stiffly, clasping his hands together nervously and reddening slightly.

"Who are you?" Severus ground out, balling his fists at his sides and trying to control his anger. He id not need to be thrown back into Azkaban for misusing a spell.

The man put his hands up defensively. "You're Severus, right?"

Severus scowled at him in reply and he took that as a yes.

"I'm Remus. I'm just a friend. I'm looking after Lily."

Severus stared hard at Remus and suddenly remembered the boxes of men's robes and other objects he had found in his home. Had this bastard gotten together with Lily and moved in? How could they think he wouldn't notice? Did they think he was that stupid? This man looked familiar as well; did Severus know him from somewhere? Severus tilted his head, studying Remus as he shifted uncomfortably under the intense glare. Severus did not give Remus the satisfaction of making conversation, although Remus tried desperately to break the uncomfortable silence.

"Lily told me everything that happened. She's been pretty upset waiting for you to come home."

Severus snarled at Remus, an animal-like sound and Remus looked alarmed. He had spent three months in Azkaban for Lily just to get out to find that she was with someone else. He should have just stayed where he was and let the dementors suck out his soul, because he felt soulless anyway now, like he was just a shell. It was supposed to be him and Lily forever when he got out. Now it was Remus and Lily.

"Listen, I know what you're thinking and it's not like that." Remus said, defensive now. "Lily and I are not together-"

Lily suddenly made a small noise, turning over restlessly and reaching out, touching Remus' hand. Her fingers curled around his and she gave a small smile in her sleep.

Severus flushed red with fury at this gesture, his lips growing thin. A murderous look washed over his eyes and he spun quickly, leaving the room and slamming the door behind him.

Remus stared after Severus, his heart pounding with adrenaline. He let himself fall back into his chair, his legs unable to support him any more and looked at the unconscious Lily.

"What have we done?" he whispered softly. How were they going to fix this?

I promise, everything will work out! Sev an Lily will be together so not to worry.