19. The Baby's Arrival
The three girls got used to life in a castle surprisingly easily over the next few months, despite their initial worries. Queen Elora provided them with money to go shopping for new clothes and anything else they needed, since the girls only owned some old and worn outfits and a couple of necessary toiletries. Galinda, of course, loved this and thanked the queen a thousand times before dragging Elphaba and Lulu along to go shopping in a town near Adurin Iir. Returning with shopping bags filled with dresses, skirts, blouses, shoes, and even some accessories and jewellery – which none of them had ever owned before – the blonde was positively beaming. She strutted around the castle for the next few days like a princess, proudly showing off her new clothes.
Lulu was glad for the shopping money, too, since her stomach had by now reached the point where it no longer fit in her regular clothing. Even Elphaba had to admit it was nice to get something new. She couldn't stop stroking the soft fabric of the thick cardigan she'd bought to replace her old one; it had been a long time since she'd owned any piece of clothing this warm.
The Tiggular family, for their part, were glad to see the girls so happy. Lori was especially concerned with Lulu, trying to guide her through the pregnancy and help and support her in every way, just like they were all doing. Lulu could often be found sitting somewhere with a book, usually on pregnancy or motherhood, but also sometimes on different topics. Elphaba was all too happy to join her and the two could sit together reading for hours. The green girl was drinking in every bit of information she could find on any kind of topic she was interested in, ranging from economics and politics to law and life sciences. She devoured fictional stories, too – anything she could get her hands on; and given the large collection of books on a wide range of topics available at Adurin Iir, she had plenty of choice. Now that she had the chance, she was determined to educate herself as much as she could.
In contrast, Galinda spent most of her time trying to brush up on her etiquette and socialising with everyone, from the servants and the town people to the occasional guests visiting the castle. A handsome man working at a store in town where they had gone shopping had caught her eye and she returned to that store a few times to flirt with him, fixing herself a date not long thereafter.
If Elphaba were to be completely honest with herself, she'd admit that she was a little jealous of how easily the blonde seemed to move on from everything she had been through in that respect. Of course she knew Galinda had been affected by it all just as much as any of them had, but she envied her friend's ability to remain positive and keep her head up. Elphaba had always tried to be like that, but she was a natural pessimist and it was hard for her to look at the bright side of things instead of worrying about everything that could possibly go wrong.
She tried, though. She tried to relax around Fiyero and to keep her fears about their relationship at bay. It was hard for her, but Fiyero's endless patience and attempts at understanding helped her a lot. She could tell that he felt mildly frustrated sometimes when his attempts at getting closer to her failed and that he wished things would move faster. She didn't blame him for that. However, she also knew that he was sincere. She saw it in his eyes every time he looked at her and that, maybe more than anything, convinced her of his true motives regarding her and put her at ease a little. The awed look on his face when she'd come down to dinner one night, wearing one of the dresses Galinda had forced her to buy, had been enough to make her blush and lower her gaze.
They spent a lot of time together; sometimes he joined her and Lulu when they were reading, but the girls also had dinner with the royal family almost every day – unless there were important guests visiting the king and queen – and Fiyero often sought Elphaba out to go for a walk or do something else together. One night, he led her to his room and taught her how to dance. When she'd laughingly asked him why he would bother, he merely grinned and said, "For future reference." She knew what that meant, of course, but she hadn't replied to that remark.
The truth was that the idea of a future with him still scared her, albeit less so than before. She was fairly certain that in time, he might actually succeed in convincing her to stay here and have a life with him, which maybe scared her even more. He mattered so much to her and she hated disappointing him, but sometimes it felt like that was exactly what she was doing by not agreeing to marry him, even though he told her he understood and didn't blame her for it.
"I keep thinking she's come such a long way from where she was," Fiyero said to his father one evening when they were going over some papers together in one of the sitting rooms. "All of them have. But then one of them says something or does something to remind me that despite the fact that they're safe now, they still don't feel safe."
"Like what?" Hamold asked him.
Fiyero slumped in his chair. "The way all the blood leaves Lulu's face and that wide-eyed look of dread she gets whenever a man she doesn't know approaches her too closely, even if it's only a servant," he said. "The fact that Fae's first response to a knock on her bedroom door is still to jump and then sit up straight and smooth out her hair and clothes as if she's expecting a customer. Even Galinda – she's been on a few dates with some man she met during her shopping trip in town, and Elphaba thought there may be something growing there, but Galinda ended it. Fae strongly suspects it's because Galinda got cold feet. None of them really know how to trust anyone." He ran his hand over his face, closing his eyes for a moment. "How did we let this happen, Dad? In our province, right under our noses? How many more people like them are out there, still suffering every day?"
"A lot," Hamold told his son honestly, placing a hand on his shoulder. "But we're working on it. You must understand, Fiyero, that the rulers of a country can never fix everything. They can't even know everything. Your mother and I have always done the best we could to be good rulers to the Vinkun people, but it's an illusion to think you'll be able to make everything right and make all your people happy. All you can do is try your hardest and sometimes that's not enough."
Fiyero nodded miserably. "I guess."
"You brought this matter to our attention now," Hamold continued, "and thus we were able to try to find a way to change it. Once you're king, there will be matters brought to your attention every day and it will be up to you to decide what to do with them. Sometimes such matters will horrify you and you'll want to do everything you can to make them right, but you won't be able to. Sometimes you'll think something fairly irrelevant and ignore it and it might come back to bite you later. Even when such things happen, you shouldn't blame yourself for them. You're only human, Yero. I think by now I can safely say that I think you will make a great king," he smiled at his son and Fiyero smiled back half-heartedly, "and I'm certain that Elphaba would be a wonderful queen; but even between the two of you to care for the Vinkus, there will be things you cannot change and people you cannot save."
There was a knock on the open door and Fiyero looked up to find Lulu there, her baby bump protruding in front of her. "Hamold?" she asked. After well over two months at Adurin Iir, the king and queen had finally convinced all three girls to call them by their first names instead of their titles. "Lori is looking for you. Last time I saw her, she was in the parlour on the second floor."
Hamold thanked her and left the room in search of his wife. Lulu glanced at Fiyero, who gave her an encouraging smile and motioned for her to come in and sit down.
"How are you?" he asked once she was sitting on the couch across from him.
She lightly touched her abdomen, as she often did these days. "Fine," she said. "Both of us. I mean, I occasionally get morning sickness, I feel bloated and fat, and my back aches all the time," she laughed ruefully, "but I can live with that. It could be so much worse."
"And emotionally?" Fiyero asked knowingly and she paused to consider that question.
"I'm better than I have been in a long time," she said honestly. "It's still hard for me to accept the idea that I'm safe now... I can't really remember ever feeling safe before. Sometimes it still feels like I'm dreaming and all of this isn't really happening. Sometimes I'm afraid I'll wake up at Morrible's brothel again, about to have my baby taken from me and to be used for another seven years by men looking for pleasure..." A shudder tore through her, but she shook it off and sighed heavily."I don't think we could ever thank you and your parents enough for what you've done for us, Fiyero."
He shook his head. "There's no need for that," he told her. "I just hope... do you think you'll ever be able to live a normal life, Lulu? To trust people and not be scared of what might happen all the time?"
She smiled faintly. "Yes," she said. "Someday – yes. I do think I still have a long way to go, but I'll get there. Galinda will, too." She cast a mischievous look in his direction. "And Elphaba."
He flushed a little.
"She's less like Galinda and more like me in that she worries about everything," Lulu continued. "She, like me, has never had a reason to feel safe before, or to trust, or to love. She's already so much further with that than I think I would have been if I'd been in her shoes and that's thanks to your influence. I'm not blind, Fiyero. I can see what's going on between you two and I don't want to get involved in things that are none of my business, but she's my friend and I want her to be happy. I just need to ask you to be patient with her. She needs time, and lots of it, to heal and to start over. Just like we all do."
Fiyero recalled that Elphaba had said the same thing a while ago, about needing time, and he nodded. "Thanks, Lulu."
"You're welcome." She hoisted herself to her feet. "Would you please excuse me? I need to use the bathroom again and then I think I should probably lie down. The baby is doing something weird inside of me and it's very uncomfortable."
He laughed. "Of course. Do you want me to walk you to your room?" he offered, but she shook her head.
"I've got it," she said. "Thank you."
She waddled away and he watched her go, lost in thought over the conversation they'd just had. He eventually rose to his feet and left the room as well, intending to go in search of Elphaba and see what she was up to; but in the hallway just around the corner from the sitting room he'd occupied, he found Lulu leaning against the wall with a strange expression on her face.
"Lulu?" he asked, alarmed. "Are you all right?"
"I... I think so." She looked pale, however, and scared. "I think... I think I had a contraction. Or something. I don't know – I don't know what they're supposed to feel like, but I have a feeling... I think it's started, Fiyero," she said, her voice small and her hands shaking. "I don't know what to do."
"I'll go get Mum and call for the midwife," Fiyero promised, but she grabbed his arm.
"No!" she cried. "Don't leave me alone!"
Of course. Stupid idea. Fiyero thought quickly. "Can you make it to your room, Lulu?"
She gritted her teeth. "I think so."
He nodded. "All right, then that's where we'll go. You've read about this, haven't you? Do you think it will be happening soon?"
"No." She shook her head. "The contractions are still a while apart."
"That's good. Here, lean on me." He supported her with his arm around her waist, holding her hand tightly in his; and together, painstakingly slowly, they made their way to the hallway where the girls' rooms were. He helped Lulu into her bed. "Now wait here for just a clock-tick. I'll be right back," he promised her, dashing out of the room. He poked his head around the doorway to Galinda's room, relieved to find the blonde there. "Galinda! Can you please go find my mother and call for the midwife?" he asked pleadingly.
Her eyes widened and she leapt to her feet. "Lulu?"
He nodded. "She's in labour."
Galinda instantly left the room and ran down the hallway. Fiyero glanced into Elphaba's room. "Fae?"
She looked up from the book she was reading, already in her nightgown – something far more modest than the one she'd owned at Madame Morrible's, but it still made her look beautiful – and he said, "Lulu is having her baby."
Without asking any questions, she put down her book before following him out of the room and into Lulu's. The girl was still in her bed, looking less frantic than Fiyero had expected, and Elphaba crawled onto the bed with her and sat behind her so she could fiddle with Lulu's hair, knowing that always calmed her down. "How are you feeling?" she asked calmly.
"Strange," Lulu admitted. "Scared. Excited. Ow!" She gasped at a contraction and Elphaba stroked her hair soothingly. "In pain," Lulu added through gritted teeth.
Elphaba laughed softly and continued to play with the younger girl's hair. "You'll be fine, you know. Is there anything we can do for you until Lori and the midwife get here?"
Lulu shook her head. "Just stay here," she pleaded quietly. "Please."
"Of course, silly. We're not going anywhere." Elphaba looked at Fiyero, who was feeling decidedly uncomfortable and a bit like he was intruding on a private moment.
"Do you want me to stay, too?" he asked uncertainly and Lulu nodded, closing her eyes.
"Please."
Elphaba smiled encouragingly at him and he took a deep breath, nodding. "Okay." He had no idea why Lulu would want him here, but he felt like it was the least he could do to help her... even though it looked like this was going to take another long while yet.