A.N.: I LIVE! I am so sorry this has taken so long!

Kazemaru and I moved away from Genkai and Kuwabara to get a better spot to fight from. The ninja wannabe decided to posture a bit before the match.

"You've drawn a bad hand. My sympathies. But in the real world, you must play the cards you were dealt." Arrogant ass. I swear, if he started going on about fate and destiny I'd put him through a tree.

Genkai shouted at us to hurry up and fight. Impatient hag. But it got the guy moving, and he decided to take the obvious approach and lead with his fists. His blows were fast and repetitive, really lacking in imagination. It didn't make it hurt any less.

I gotta say, swamp water tastes like shit. 0 out of 10 would do again.

He charged me again, but this time I got a punch in of my own. Too bad I punched a log instead of his face. Bastard pulled a Body Switch™ on me!

"You're good kid," he smirked. "But I'm a true ninja."

Asshole doesn't know who he's talking to.

He reaches into a pocket and pulled out a bunch of rope, more than his pocket had room for really. Dramatically measuring out a section of it, he flexes his aura and starts snapping the rope like a whip. It'll hurt if it catches me. Time for a little ninja-ing of my own.

I make like I'm going to charge him, 'stumble', and run faster. Just when I'm out of range of his rope I fling the handful mud I'd grabbed during my 'stumble' at his face. So of course he focuses on slashing the mud instead of keeping his eyes on me. Makes it real easy to push some of my reiki to my feet and jump over the guy unnoticed. I am so glad that worked how I wanted it to. And since I was behind the big dork, it was real easy to plant my foot in his ass and launch him several yards away.

The dude squealed like a little girl.

He landed a little awkwardly, with both hands trying to clutch his rear close, but still on his feet. Damn. I ran at him again, hoping to use his distraction again. No such luck. He spun around when I was too close to stop and lashed at me with the rope.

The look of surprise on his face when I pulled my own Body Switch™ on him is something I will always remember. Kuwabara's shocked yell was great too.

"Where'd he learn that?" Genkai asked him.

"Dunno, but he's been using it on teachers for years now."

Heh. It took me months to figure out how to do it, and I use it whenever I need to break a hold on me. Tanaka is overly fond of dragging me around by my ears, and this way I can escape without getting in trouble for hurting a teacher. Never thought I'd use it like this, though.

"Heathen!" Kazemaru looked pissed. "You dare insult the way of the ninja?"

"Just 'cause you're mad that I can do your tricks better than you can doesn't make me a heathen!" I pulled an eyelid down to taunt him further. It worked spectacularly. He dropped the rope and pulled throwing stars out of another pocket. I wasn't too worried. Those things are difficult to aim or use if you don't have the right teacher. He threw them at me and I dodged, easily.

What I didn't know was that the ninja wannabe could put his aura into his throwing stars and control them mid flight. Which was a really sucky thing to do. Those little metal stars swooped around and made another pass at me and I wouldn't have noticed if they hadn't made stupid whistling noises as they flew. I ducked just in time to keep them from imbedding into my skull.

"A true master of Ninjutsu has complete control of his weapons at all times!" he flexed his aura again and that was when I really saw it. It wasn't blue, and it wasn't orange. It was pink. I burst out laughing and nearly got myself killed by his stupid stars.

"What is it? What is so funny?"

"Pink!" I gasped out, moving out of the way of the stars. "Your aura is pink!"

His face went red. "So what if it is? I'll still kill you!"

Another pass by the throwing stars, this time forcing me to dive low to avoid them. Something heavy was pressed against my back when I stood, and I took a moment to pull it out of the waistband of my jeans to look at it. It was that fucking knife.

"Shit!" I swung the knife away with every intent to throw it into the nearest bog. It hadn't left my hand when it passed within an inch of a throwing star, draining the aura out of it and dropping the smaller weapon to the ground. It exploded on contact with the grass.

Kazemaru laughed as I pulled myself out of a puddle as deep as my chest, my hair still smoking from the explosion. "Do you like my throwing stars? I designed them myself, complete with the bombs inside! The lightest touch will set them off, making each near miss a direct hit!"

"Exploding throwing stars, eh? Now I know for sure you don't have a girlfriend!"

Rage took over his face in a heartbeat. He reached into his pockets with both hands this time and threw a double handful of those things at me. There had to be at least twenty of the things in the air now, and they refused to fly together. I had metal coming at me from all sides. As I dodged like my life depended on it (and it did) I could see him out of the corner of my eye. He was doing something with his aura, and with a sinking feeling in my gut, I realized he was readying his own aura attack.

The knife was still in my hand. I wanted to use it, but I didn't want to kill myself with the resulting carnage. With each pass the throwing stars were getting closer and closer. I wouldn't be able to dodge them forever. The knife was warm in my hand, and gave me an idea. I threw it at Kazemaru, aiming low for his legs. Honestly I had only hoped to distract him. I didn't expect the blade to stick in his knee and start feeding off his aura. The stars around me wobbled and slowed. Some even drifted towards the ground. They were too close, I couldn't run. No choice then.

I Body Switched™ with Kazemaru and let him take the blasts. It was horrible, really, and did nothing for my guilt except to increase it.

When the smoke cleared I could see the ninja wannabe lying on the grass, his clothes and skin burnt pretty badly. His aura was almost gone. Screw caution, I ran over and pulled the knife out of his knee, stopping it from consuming the rest of his aura. He groaned, but remained lying.

Genkai came closer and pressed one hand on his forehead. Her aura went green. His injuries healed slightly. "That should be enough to keep him from Death's door."

Huh. Green means healing. I'll have to remember that.

"You've won this round, kid. Ready for your last opponent?"

"If I must."

"No way!" Kuwabara stomped over, waving his hands to get attention. "I didn't come here to fight, or to be your student. I just need some advice on my sixth sense, nothing else!"

The hag eyed him carefully. "Are you sure? You stand a good chance of beating him if you fight now."

"Naw, it's not a real victory if he's not at full strength. Besides, I'll beat him on my own, just you wait!"

Good old idiot Kuwabara. Truth be told, I wasn't up for fighting him right now. All I wanted was a shower, a burger, and sleep. Not necessarily in that order.

Genkai rolled her eyes. "Fine. Yusuke wins. And since you're in better shape than he is, you can carry the loser back to the temple."

Kuwabara grumbled but did as he was told. I guess he didn't want to ruin his chances of getting advice from her.

As we walked back, I had a feeling I was forgetting something. A quick glance showed we were one person short.

"Hey, where's Botan?"