Hiei doesn't understand Kuwabara.
Character(s): main four
note: Tornado knocked out our power and i'm all thrown off for writing now :p Boo! I hate getting knocked off a pattern-its hard to get back on it then!
More important note: This story was inspired by Hlel on tumblr, based off some art they did. They have a very charming ask blog,
Hiei didn't understand Kuwabara, and he was pretty sure he never would.
"Get THAT away from me!"
"Oh my God Kuwabara! It's just a fucking centipede!"
"It's like 10 fucking feet tall!"
"No it's not!...It's only four feet!"
Yusuke was currently holding a rather large demon species of centipede in his arms, the creature squirming as it was held aloft. It was harmless, not poisonous like the human kind, and to demons they made for good pets. It was however, much larger than the human species of centipedes, and this bug had grown four feet long and if allowed to live could possibly grow up to 11 feet in length. Kuwabara had gone several shades whiter upon seeing the bug, and was trying to keep away from Yusuke, who had taken it upon himself to torment his best friend. Rather comically Kuwabara was giving off howling high-pitched screeches anytime Yusuke came near him, arms holding out the centipede in mischievous delight.
"Kuwabara, that bug really is harmless. Why...Yusuke could even throw it at you, and the bug wouldn't pose a threat," Kurama's sickeningly sweet voice called out.
Kuwabara and Yusuke both looked at Kurama in a moment of stunned silence. Yusuke then broke out into the biggest grin while Kuwabara snarled, "Kurama, you fucking troll!"
Soon Kuwabara was running screaming from Yusuke as the the youth began chase, holding the centipede high over his head, trying to take aim of his target. Kurama took his place at Hiei's side, Hiei shaking his head, "How cruel, Kurama."
"I say we deserve to be able to blow off some steam...and this is an amusing way to do that," Kurama stated with a grin, his eyes glinting playfully.
The four had just completed a small mission as a favor to Mukuro. A group of slave traders had been spotted trying to pass through her territory, but do to other matters, she had requested for Hiei to take care of the problem. Yusuke had caught wind of the task, and decided to make it a "group bonding activity," and just like old times the four of them had gone out to face the odds. The mission had been very easy, but the sheer number of slave traders had made the mission a long one.
Now they were heading back towards Murkuo's home, and had stumbled across the giant bug which was making Kuwabara scream in panic.
"Come on Kuwabara! It loves you!"
"No-don't Urameshi!" Kuwabara shrieked dodging the centipede as it was projected at him.
Hiei glanced down as something brushed against his leg. Another centipede, this one only about two feet long, but just as thick as the longer one, was trying to crawl over Hiei's foot. Hiei stooped down and picked up the bug, glancing over at Kuwabara.
"Hey Kuwabara," Hiei called.
Foolishly, Kuwabara turned to face Hiei, only to receive a face first of squiggling, wiggling, centipede.
Kuwabara exploded into a girlish squeal, his whole body jerking into a giant convulsion. He flinched into himself, balancing up on one leg as he sank into panic and fear. He quickly lost balance, and fell back into a sloping ditch, and with an evil giggle, Yusuke chucked the larger centipede on Kuwabara, sending Kuwabara into more hysterics. Kuwabara's shrieks turned into howls as he continuously flinched, curling in on himself, and only managing to draw the bugs closer to his body-not push them away.
The sight was so hysterical as Kuwabara panicked over the large bugs, that even Hie found himself laughing easily along with Yusuke and Kurama.
Kuwabara had just managed to brush the bugs off of himself and sit up when a tremor ran through the ground beneath their feet.
"...The hell?" Yusuke rasped out as he was knocked down to all fours from the force of the tremor.
There was a loud ripping sound as the ground near Kuwabara opened up, and a large black translucent hand reached out and grabbed Kuwabara the fingers closing fully around Kuwabara's entire body. The air around them seemed to create a sucking vortex and knocked the rest of the prone team off their feet. Kuwabara didn't even have time to scream as the hand pulled Kuwabara through the ground, the crack closing up after him. The earth sealed up, as if there had been no giant hand that spirited Kuwabara away, and for a moment all was quiet.
"KUWABARA!"
Yusuke was up on his feet charging up his spirit gun within a matter of seconds, Hiei and Kurama scrambling closely behind. Yusuke fired a large blast right where Kuwabara disappeared, and the ground gave way revealing a large dark underground cavern. Wasting no words, the three demons descended into the darkness.
Immediately, an invisible force pressed against the three, slamming them down deeper in the dark, a mangled voice shrieking loudly at them as their bodies were pressed flat from an unseen pressure. What ever had them pinned coiled around them, and squeezed hard against their chests. Hiei choked as he felt energy being sapped from his body as air was trying to be wrung out of his chest.
"I can't fucking see!" Yusuke snarled from somewhere to Hiei's left, his voice strained as he struggled against the unseen force.
Hiei grunted and turned his head towards the sound of Yusuke's voice, blinking in the unnatural darkness. Hiei could see nothing, nothing at all.
"Something is wrong with this cavern. The darkness isn't normal...something is taking my energy!"
Yusuke didn't seem to hear Hiei, his worry for his friend so great. Yusuke merely continued to scream and curse into the dark, his words not always coherent.
"KUWABARA! KUWABARA?!" Kurama shouted from Hiei's right, voice lost as another twisted voice howled over them.
Hiei flinched as the roar passed over them. The voice was mangled and otherworldly-its howl wrapped around Hiei and choked him with a startling fear that Hiei had never felt before. Kurama and Yusuke stilled for a moment, and Hiei was sure they felt it too-this unspoken terrible dread that the voice brought. When it quieted, the fear went with it, and Hiei began to struggle once more.
"KUWABARA!"
"KUWABARA! ANSWER US!"
A cold sense of dread crawled up Hiei's spine as he couldn't help but think for all their screaming, Kuwabara's voice was the only one not heard.
Yusuke began firing off random shots in the dark, the blue light of his energy casting some light on the large black snake like coils that were wrapped around the group. After every shot he called out desperately in the dark, panicking the longer Kuwabara did not call back in return. He fired off another blast of energy, and for a second, just in front of him Hiei thought he saw the outline of a tall man, and a white face. A lump formed in his throat, a cold sweat chilled his skin, and fear squeezed at Hiei's chest like a vice. He pursed his lips, his throat constricting against this foreign feeling of terror. It was as if this intense fear wasn't his, but belonged to something else in the cavern.
"Yusuke! YUSUKE! You have to stop! You'll bring the whole cave down on us!" Kurama cried, his voice shrill from terror.
The others must have been feeling the unnatural horror as well, Hiei reasoned.
"I don't care! KUWABARA! KUWABARA! KUWABARA!" Yusuke howled, his voice cracking with terror.
There was something here, and it was possessing the three of them in some way-Hiei was sure of that. Hiei closed his eyes willing himself to remain calm. They needed to be calm in order to get out, in order to find Kuwabara-
Calm down. And be quiet.
Hiei shivered, his body stiffening and eyes snapping open as Kuwabara's voice whispered in his head.
"K-KUWABARA?" Yusuke called into the darkness, his tone suggesting he had also heard their missing friend's voice.
It's me. Just relax. You need to be quiet now.
"Where are you?" Kurama asked, his voice only slightly raised, and sounding less terrified.
Shhhhh, Kuwabara's voice soothed inside their heads his calming tone making Hiei relax, I'll explain soon...but she's going to keep attacking until you all quiet down. You're scaring her.
"Her? Her? WHOSE THIS 'HER?' KUWABARA?"
Man, shut the hell up will ya?! Kuwabara's voice snipped, and Hiei almost laughed. The terror that had gripped them was edging away now, as if it too was being soothed away by Kuwabara's voice.
No matter what...just remain quiet. Just for a little while.
And so, for two solid minutes that felt like an eternity, the three demons could only wait quietly in the dark, coils of pressure still squeezing down on them. Finally they were released, and the darkness seemed to lessen. There was that same sucking sound from earlier, and the cavern slowly lit up with a dull light cast off from crystals stuck within the cavern's walls. About three feet in front of them stood Kuwabara, stopped in front of a dried out twisted corpse, that he was whispering to.
"See? You had them scared...that's all. People are loud when they're scared," Kuwabara whispered, attention solely focused on the remains in front of him.
The body was small, and twisted up in large roots. The clothing on the body was torn, and dull, the color of the fabric completely washed and faded away by time. But Kuwabara talked to this small, twisted corpse, and even paused between sentences as if he was hearing an answer back.
Hiei blinked, not exactly sure what he was seeing. He cocked his head looking over at Kurama and Yusuke who were sharing similar surprised expressions.
"Kuwabara...what's going on?" Kurama ventured quietly, placing a hand on Yusuke's shoulder in case the former street punk started yelling again.
"This is Kumiko...she was buried alive down here by her village. She heard my screaming and got scared, that's all," Kuwabara said, still remaining stooped down in front of the corpse.
"...That's a flippin' mummy Kuwabara!" Yusuke hissed, his tone suggesting he was severely creeped out by the small corpse.
"I guess you guys wouldn't be able to see her... but yeah she's dead. She's a ghost. But trust me there's a little girl here, and she's just been scared. This place is really dark," Kuwabara answered lifting up his arms towards the mangled dried out corpse.
"Kumiko, why don't you come with me? I live at a shrine on top of a hill, and it's very sunny. And at night if you're scared, I'll hang a lantern above where you sleep...okay?" Kuwabara whispered. There was a pause, and then Kuwabara smiled, seeming to have gotten his answer. With gentle hands he reached out and placed them on the corpse's arms.
As soon as he touched the body the cavern was flooded with orange light, and for a moment Hiei could see the little girl Kuwabara had been conversing with. The child had white hair, and pale blue skin. She was dressed in a red and yellow kimono, and plain wooden sandles. Two small horns daintily crowned her forehead, and six watery eyes, all focused intensely on Kuwabara, stared at the human who was touching her. The child was reaching for Kuwabara eagerly as the psychic took her into his arms. As soon as she was properly cradled in his arms, the light was gone, as was the clear form of the child.
Kuwabara held the small corpse tenderly to him, as if he was holding a sleeping babe.
Kuwabara looked out at his friends shocked faces, and he shrugged awkwardly under their stares, "Seems like her village sacrificed her to appease some Gods or something...she's been alone and scared ever since. I guess I woke her up with all my screaming. She'll be better off at the shrine."
No one was able to say a word.
Kuwabara shifted again, frowning uncomfortably as his friends scrutinized him.
Finally, Hiei removed his cloak, and placed it gingerly over the child's corpse.
"Okay...harmless bugs make you scream like a girl...but scary mummified dead kids you're cool with?" Yusuke sighed, tucking his hands behind his head uncomfortably.
Kuwabara shrugged, "I mean...ghosts are kinda scary...but you know. A lot of them are just...sad."
Kurama smiled at Kuwabara, and clapped a hand on his arm. He then turned away towards the direction from where they'd fallen, looking to assess how they would climb out.
Hiei glanced up at Kuwabara's calm face, and as his eyes raked over Kuwabara for injuries spotting two child-sized hand print bruises around his throat. As calm as Kuwabara had been, the ghost has tried to kill him. But Kuwabara had forgiven her and offered her spirit rest. He could be fearless in face of a twisted spirit-something you couldn't fight, but would be terrified over a harmless bug.
"I just don't get you human," Hiei muttered quietly, turning away from Kuwabara to join Kurama.
Hiei was fairly certain that he would never understand Kuwabara, nor would there ever be anyone like him. Privately, Hiei thought that was unfortunate.
End