"You're leaving?"

"Yeah, sorry," Brady tells me, grabbing his sweatshirt, "I'm going to dinner with some of the guys."

"I didn't know that," I tell him, feeling a bit annoyed.

He shrugs, like it's not a big deal to him. It's not a big deal, but it's just a little annoying. "Well, I didn't know you were under the impression I was going to stay all night. I mean, we did our homework, we watched an episode of Criminal Minds."

I don't really say anything. I just sit here, flipping through the channels for something good to watch. I'm annoyed with him at the moment.

"Why are you mad?"

"I'm not mad, but when I asked if you wanted to come over to hang out, I didn't know you had other plans as well."

"I'm sorry, didn't know you meant the whole night."

Obviously not the whole night. It's Sunday. It's a school night.

But I thought he would come over, we could do our science homework together, watch some TV or just hang out and then go out to dinner because I'm craving some pizza from Souplantation. Ha. I guess not, though. I mean, I'm not mad. It's totally fine he wants to go and hang out with his friends, too, but letting me know would have been nice because this whole time, I was thinking we were gonna go get dinner and I really want dinner.

"It's fine."

"We good?" He smiles at me.

"Yeah, we're good," I get up and walk him to the door, "text me later."

He kisses me and agrees, "will do, babe."

Sometimes, I wonder why I'm dating Brady Smith because on paper, we're complete opposites.

But that one night almost seven months ago, something happened and ever since then, we're been together. I mean, it's not this can't live without him relationship, but it's good. I'm happy. He's attentiveness. He's caring. He's nice. He's funny. He's gorgeous. There's not much more I could ask for.

Except that feeling you're supposed to have when you're with someone you like.

That spark.

That feeling that when you see them, you instantly smile.

Or when you're with them, you feel content. Like there's nothing that could ruin it. Being able to do absolutely nothing with them.

I don't know if it's asking for too much.

So, I try to push it out of my head and just think about the fact that we're in high school and maybe we're not supposed to feel this way in high school. We're young, we have so much ahead of us and being able to just hang out and make each other laugh should be worth it.

As he's driving off, I call Emily to see if she wants to come with me.

But nope.

She's going to dinner with her cousin Kristina.

So then I call my friend Morgan and she agrees because she's craving their blueberry muffins.

Thank God for Morgan.

"Is there a Souplantation in Rhode Island?"

"I don't think so."

Morgan's eyes widen, "oh my gosh, what're you going to do?"

I laugh, "okay, let's not get ahead of ourselves. I haven't even applied yet, Morg."

She rolls her eyes as she tears her pizza in half and dips one piece of it in ranch, "okay, but you're going to get in. I know it, you know it, the neighbors know it. Everyone knows it. And you're gonna be over there all the time craving these delicious slices of pizza."

"I think I'll manage," I grab a slice and also dip it in ranch, "but please, let's not jinx it."

"It's not, you're getting in."

"Oh, so you're perfectly okay with me saying you're getting into MIT?"

Morgan laughs, "okay, fine. But that's different because you've had a perfect grade point average all through high school. I got a B in CHEM!"

I get her point. But still. "You made it up."

"Imagine if we both get in, though, we'll only be an hour away from each other."

"That would be so great."

Morgan Brown is one of my best friends in the world.

I think Emily's my number one strictly because I've known her longer. Because Morgan and I are one in the same. She's just a really great friend and someone I want in my life forever. We share a lot of the same interests and goals and morals and I love hanging out with her. So the fact that she applied to MIT, an hour away from Brown, I'm stoked. If I ever feel homesick, I can just drive to her and be reminded of home.

I've known Morgan since middle school. We met in 7th grade during math and the rest is history. She's one of my favorite people in the world.

"Are you busy three weekends from now?"

"I don't think so," I laugh at the fact that she didn't just give me dates, "why, what's up?"

"My mom and I are going to Cambridge for the weekend."

Okay, I need dates.

And I think she's inviting me, right?

"I mean, I don't think it'll change my decision of wanting to apply there, but we wanna go and check it out, get a feel for it. The third weekend of October, it's a long weekend so thought we'd go and we want you to come. We'll head to Providence for the day and check that out. Yeah?"

"Well, I gotta ask my parents, but I'd be so down," I tell her, "yeah, that sounds like so much fun."

"Right? My mom's already making an itinerary."

I love her mom.

And going on a small trip like this with them sounds exciting and fun.

"Remember when we went to San Francisco for the weekend and she was walking around with a clipboard, checking off everything we did."

"YES!" Morgan laughs, "she's bringing that clipboard."

"She's so great," I laugh.

The Browns are some of my favorite people. I'm closer to the Boltons as a whole, but I love the Browns. I know if I was ever kicked out of my house or anything like that, if I needed some place to crash, they'd be there in a heartbeat for me. Her mom and dad are the nicest and her younger sister Tessa is like the younger sister I always wished I had. Throughout the years, Morgan has been on vacation with my family and I've been on vacations with their family and we've even been on some together. I love that. I love that my family is friends with my friends family. It makes everything in life so much more fun.

I pushed my empty plate to the side and got up to get some more food.

This place is so great.

When my brother was in town and not away at UCLA, we'd come almost every Sunday. It was our little tradition.

So, I'm trying to keep up with it.

"How are things with Brady?" Morgan asks me as I come back from grabbing some ice cream.

"Good," I shrug.

"I just feel like I haven't seen much of you guys."

Yeah, around school. I know what she means. We've both just been busy these past couple of weeks. I mean, school kind of just started. Well, we're almost a month in, but still, we're getting adjusted. And projects are being thrown at us already. Plus, we have a different schedule, no classes whatsoever together. And we take different routes to class. But we do have lunch together some days. And we always meet up before our last period.

We're still hanging out after school and on weekends and stuff, but it has been cut down a bit. Like I said, we've both just been busy and stuff.

Me, with schoolwork. Him with schoolwork and club soccer.

"Yeah, well we've both been busy."

"What are you guys going to do if you guys make it another year?" She asks.

And for the first time, I actually think about it.

I hadn't thought about it. I hadn't thought about the fact that the only school he's applying to that's close to me is Harvard. But it's not even the number one school he wants to go to. He has a good shot, though, since his dad is an alumni and is chummy with people there.

But I honestly have no idea. We haven't talked about that. Should we be talking about that? Should that be a factor in how we apply to school?

"I mean, we haven't really talked about it," I tell her, "should we?"

"Well, it's been 6 months."

"Maybe because we haven't filled out actual applications yet. It's all just talk."

Morgan shrugs, "still. I think you guys should."

It's been half a year. I think we do owe it to ourselves to at least have a conversation about it.

But now all I'm thinking about is if we're even going to be together then. I think six months in, you're supposed to know if you see a future with them. And the weird thing is, I don't want to break up with Brady at all. I'm happy. But I try to look in the future with him, and I just don't see anything. I don't see what normal people in six months relationships see. And I don't know if that's completely normal or not a good thing.

"Do you like Brady?"

"What?" Morgan looks at me weirdly, "yeah, he's fine. Why?"

I shrug, "I don't know. My brother's like whatever about it, but Troy... he likes hates the guy even though he says he doesn't. Just doesn't like him."

She laughs, "my favorite thing is Troy rolling his eyes in Government every time he talks. No offense."

"Why don't I see what he sees?"

"What do you mean?" She asks me, "see what?"

"I don't know. I fucking hate to admit it because Troy is so annoying sometimes, but we're so much alike. More than Emily and I and ever since I've known him, we've always disliked the same people. We always thought the same people and things were annoying. So, I don't know why I don't with him."

Morgan laughs, "well, you're dating him, first of all. That's probably why."

I shake my head, "no, even before..."

"I don't know," she shrugs, "I mean, I get it, no offense but Brady can just be... obnoxious. Like he's better than everyone."

"Yeah?"

"He's totally nice to me and always has been."

I guess, but am I being blind? Am I blind to how he actually is? I mean, Brady is like royalty at our school and it's not because he's so cool and nice and everything. It's because he's rich as fuck and good looking and people just gravitate towards that.

And I guess I did, too.

But he's nice to me. He's been so good to me. and he's caring. And see.

"Don't worry what other people say," Morgan tells me, "if you're happy then that's all that matters. He's been nothing but good to you."

"Yeah, you're right," I let it go.

"I'm gonna go get some ice cream," she gets up.

Whatever.

I push it out of my mind.