Boyue's Note: I was playing with my Damien and Pip Sims the other day. They had twins – a boy and a girl! =D And everything was going well until Pip decided to be a hero and tried to extinguish a tree fire. Unfortunately, he didn't do so well. The fire spread all around him. It was like Hell had opened up to swallow Pip. I tried to get Damien to help but if you have played The Sims, you'll know that Sims are in panic mode whenever there is a fire. Damien was freaking out and did nothing to help Pip. So Pip caught on fire and burnt to death while Damien and their daughter watched. So sad…

But that has nothing to do with this chapter.

MATERNAL HEART

"The First Trimester…

Seeking Compromise"

Damien takes a breath to calm his trembling body – his body trembling with anger. He clenches his fists and flares his teeth like a cornered animal. He grips the doorknob and shakes the door violently. Even though the apartment is cheaply built, the door stays locked, separating him and Pip. Unlike Pip's tranquil personality, Damien has a nasty temper and right now, he is about to be pushed to the edge. He won't just roll over and give up. Hell no. The day the anti-Christ is locked out of his own bedroom will not come.

"For the last time," Damien snarls, giving the stubborn door a hard kick, "Open the fucking door!"

"Let me be, Damien," Pip shouts. An angry sob is audible. "I don't want to see you."

"Whatever the fuck is up your ass, can't we talk about it face-to-face?"

"No, I am very crossed with you… I don't know if I can control myself. I think… I think I want to… kick you in the nuts!"

Damien draws in a deep gulp of air and blows it out of his mouth. His neck feels hot and his fingernails are scratching open his skin. He backs away from the door, calculating how much force it will take to ram it down. The door can't be that stable, can it? Too bad he isn't allowed to use his power even as the tips of his fingers burn. If he wants to, he can incinerate the door in a matter of seconds. But he isn't allowed to. So he has to resort to negotiating. Like a pathetic human.

"Why are you mad at me? What did I do?" Damien says as calmly as he can manage.

"You know what you did," Pip answers.

"Oh, Your Fucking Majesty, if I know what it is, I wouldn't be standing here and asking you like a goddamn idiot!" Damien can't resist but slams his fist in the door. He shakes his hand, hissing once he learns his lesson. Wood versus hand – hand loses. He says, "So just tell me and we can get over it and move on."

"I ran into Eric at school today," Pip says, his voice climbing the vocal scale. Damien is even more worried now. Eric Cartman is only good for one thing and that is to ruin people's life. He braces himself for whatever nonsense Cartman has put into Pip's head. Pip continues, "He told me you were talking to Kenny."

Damien's jaw drops in both anger and shock. He knew it would be bad but he didn't think it will be this bad. He didn't think it will be Kenny-bad. Now he sees why Pip is throwing a hissy fit like there is a twelve-foot pole in his ass. He huffs his shoulders and then shrugs them. What is he supposed to say to that? He was talking to Kenny and he was caught by Cartman. Damn that Eric Cartman! Damn him straight to Hell!

"Fucking fatass," he grumbles and it's the only thing he can think of to say.

"How could you do that to me?" Pip sobs. "How could you talk to him behind my back?"

"Pip, c'mon…" Damien rolls his eyes. He is never good at explaining himself. "You should've known that I'm not going to stop talking to Kenny just because you don't want me to. It doesn't work like that. You can't tell me what to do."

"Fuck you, Damien!" Pip shouts so loud that it feels like he is doing it right next to Damien's ears. "I rarely ask anything of you. I just ask for one simple thing – don't ever talk to Kenny McCormick but you can't even do that for me."

"You have to get over it," Damien says in response, shaking his head. "That's all I'm going to say. Get over it."

"Forgive me for not being able to 'get over' the fact that you cheated on me with him."

"Damn it, Pip!" It is now Damien's turn to shout very loud. The neighbors are sure to hear them. "We've been over this! When that happened, I thought we were broken up."

"We were not broken up," Pip says firmly, "we had an argument and I stayed at my uncle's place for a while. Despite that, we were still a couple and you cheated on me."

"You didn't talk to me for a month," Damien rebuts, throwing his hands in the air even though Pip can't see it. "You wouldn't answer my calls. You didn't even open the door when I was pounding the shit out of it. Pip, you were going to file a restraining order against me. So, no, forgive me for taking them as a sign that we were done."

"I will grant you that," Pip says with a sniff. "But what hurts me the most is that you brought another man into our apartment and had sex with him on our bed."

"I didn't have sex with Kenny!" No, it isn't a Bill Clinton impression.

"You were about to! And that's what matters."

Damien won't deny that. If Pip hadn't walked in at that exact moment – the moment when he was pushing Kenny's legs up and readying himself for entry – yeah, he would have totally had sex with Kenny. And it would've been good. It would've been mind-blowing good. But instead, he fell out of bed with a full hard-on, chased after Pip out of the apartment, and tried to explain himself naked on the street. He learned first-hand that night that it is impossible to give a good explanation with an erection and alcohol cruising through the veins. The night ended with him not getting laid, things getting extremely awkward with Kenny, and Pip running off crying his eyes out.

But he is tired of fighting with Pip over that incident. What happened, what didn't happen, who cares? They are still together. Isn't that what counts?

"Be honest with me. Today isn't the first time you have spoken to Kenny, is it?" Pip asks.

"What do you want me to say, huh?" Damien says with a sigh. He shrugs and shakes his head. He is ending the argument now. If Pip still wants to mope about it, then that's Pip's business. "Yeah, fine, I was wrong. I made a mistake. I thought we were broken up but I guess we weren't and so yes, I cheated on you. And I am an asshole for doing that. But if I didn't love you so much, I wouldn't have put up with your shit. I wouldn't be standing here right now, trying to convince you that I love you, asking you to forgive me and move on. I wouldn't have agreed to have a baby with you even though I think that's a crazy idea and I have no clue what I'm going to do when the baby comes. And… I know you'll always think I'm at fault and you can hold that over my head forever. I don't care. But Kenny is my friend regardless of what happened and I think it's bullshit for you to demand that I don't talk to him. Because no matter how much it pisses me off, I would never take away something that makes you happy."

Damien heaves a deep sigh. He hates giving speeches. They always sound so fake and rehearsed. He stands outside the door for a moment, listening for Pip's reaction. He hears a loud sniffle but otherwise, there isn't a verbal response. That's what drives him crazy about his relationship. They can be in perfect harmony and bliss one minute and bite each other's head the next. There are so many ups and downs. It's like a… what's the term that humans like to use… 'emotional rollercoaster'. Every day, he wonders how it is possible that they are even in a relationship. They are complete opposite of each other and want different things out of life. Sometimes, he just wonders…

"When you're done being mad, I'll be in the living room. I bought some foot lotion at the mall. I was going to give you a massage," Damien says. "Anyways… Come get me if you want it."

He waits for a few more seconds. The door stays locked and close in his face. He turns around and heads into the living room. He walks by the kitchen table and picks up the shopping bag with the lotion. He looks inside at the white and purple tissue papers and sighs. He takes the bag with him to the couch. He sure hopes he will get to use the lotion. It was really expensive for a lotion. He puts his legs on the coffee table and stares at the blank TV screen. He can make out a bit of his reflection. What is the matter with him? He is the anti-Christ! He is supposed to be feared and revered by many. Instead, he is living in a one-bedroom apartment in god-forsaken South Park, Colorado, planning to share the rest of his mortal life with a British man who can pass for a girl and is named after a character from a Dickens novel. He doesn't need to be told how much he has failed in life – he can see it on his face. Someone might as well stamp a big, fat 'loser' on his forehead so everyone else can know.

He leans against the couch and makes what feels like the hundredth sigh of the night. It's at moments like these that he is glad he knows Kenny because Kenny can give him advices on what to do. But he knows he'll fuck things up more if he leaves to find Kenny now. God, he is so pathetic! What is it about Pip that makes him so vulnerable and helpless? He has pretty much surrendered himself to Pip's whim. Shit, he was going to give Pip a foot massage. Does anyone have any idea how degrading that is? He isn't Jesus – he doesn't go around touching people's feet.

"Damien?"

Damien snaps right out of his thought. He looks at Pip and puts his legs down. He didn't even hear the door unlocking and Pip coming out. He feels a pang in his chest when he sees the redness and the bags under Pip's eyes from crying too much. Pip's voice is raspy too. Why does Damien care so much about him? What is so special about Phillip Pirrup? Pip walks around and sits down on the far edge of the couch. He sniffs and rubs the tips of his nose with a finger. He gazes at Damien, mouth opening and closing like a carp as he tries to formulate his thoughts.

"I am still crossed at you," Pip says after a moment. "But if you massage me, I don't think I will be so angry no more."

Pip scoots into the couch. Shyly, he brings one leg up and puts it on Damien's laps. Damien lowers his eyes and stares at Pip's socked foot. The bottom of the sock is turning brown from the dirt. He shifts his body and scoots back toward the armrest. He pushes up Pip's pajama pant legs and takes off the sock. He turns around and takes out the bottle of lotion from the bag.

"May I see it?" Pip says. He reaches for the bottle. He twists off the cap and takes a sniff. A soft smile creeps up his face. He looks at Damien and says, "It smells like Pina Colada."

"You said pineapple and coconut remind you of summer and you like that," Damien says. He takes the bottle back and shakes the lotion directly onto Pip's foot. He puts down the bottle on the coffee table. He doesn't really know how to give a foot massage. He assumes rubbing will do the trick. He takes Pip's foot and starts to spread the lotion over the skin. He can feel a bit of swelling and sees the redness. No wonder Pip said his feet hurt. He applies pressure on the sole of Pip's foot and just lets his fingers roam wherever feels right.

"That feels nice…"

"I bet," Damien mumbles. He is usually able to pretend nothing happens but after that big of a fight, it's hard to play stupid.

"I am sorry I yelled at you," Pip says. Two seconds after he said it, he bursts into tears. He stammers, "I-I a-am s-sorry. P-Please d-don't be m-mad."

"Pip, look at my face," Damien says sternly. He knits his brows and purses his lips down. "I am not mad."

"Oh, it's m-my ho-hormones. They m-make me feel all bothered i-inside. I am an awful w-wreck. I didn't mean to s-snap… I a-am…"

Damien stops rubbing Pip's foot. He leans over and pulls Pip into his arms. Pip clutches onto his shirt and cries on his chest. Damien squeezes the Brit and rocks him gently back and forth. He plants a kiss at the top of the blonde hair and closes his eyes. Whatever it is that Pip has, Damien is completely under its spell.

"Don't cry. I hate it when you cry," Damien shushes.

"D-do you still l-love me?" Pip asks into Damien's shoulder.

"What do you think?" Damien pulls Pip away and stares intensely into the tearful blue eyes. "Would my hand smell like your feet if I didn't still love you?"

"I don't suppose so," Pip says, shaking his head meekly.

Pip slumps forward and lies on top of Damien. Pip has definitely gained some weight. Damien leans down on the couch until both of them are lying flat. He runs his hand down Pip's back while the blonde sniffs quietly. Sure, they have made up now but this is going down the record. And when they have their next fight, one of them is going to bring tonight up and everything will snowball until the next fight. Eventually, one day, they will just have so big an issue that there is no way they can be together anymore. It's almost funny to Damien that he is constantly thinking about what will happen when they finally call it over. He really hopes he will never find out. God must be laughing his ass off right now… playing Damien like that. But Damien has no trouble admitting the truth. He loves Pip. He loves-loves-loves Pip so fucking much.

"I don't mind you speaking to Kenny," Pip mutters into Damien's chest, "but will you not… mention him in front of me? I don't care to hear anything about him."

"Got it," Damien says. He decides to leave out that he hopes someday the three of them can get together. If things haven't gone down the wrong way, he thinks Kenny and Pip would've been good friends.

"Will you finish giving me the massage?"

Damien nods his head. He guides Pip up until the blonde is sitting against the couch. He kneels down in front and takes the foot into his hand. He shakes out the lotion and smoothes it over. Pip leans his head back and lets out a content sigh. Damien gazes upward. At the angle, he can see a bump beneath Pip's top. Pip is drawing close to the end of his first trimester. In the next three months, he is going to get bigger, be in new kinds of pain, and be so much needier. Damien isn't sure how he will manage. He heard somewhere that no one is supposed to argue with a pregnant lady. What is he supposed to do with Pip? He doesn't like the thought of agreeing with Pip on everything.

He rubs the bottom of Pip's foot. He pulls up a smile as he gives it a tickle. The Brit giggles and wiggles his toes. And all is well again.

At least for now.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Boyue's Note: Ah, my apologies for the short chapter. I am sectioning the fic by trimesters so next up will the oh-so-fun second trimester!

Reviews will Boyue a happy panda! =D

03.07.09

5:59 PM