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Strange Interludes
Chapter 10
"The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in."
-Morrie Schwartz
…
Postlude 3: Time
I hate time.
It just made me realize what I've missed for the past two years.
If I've only realized that it felt so good to forgive and forget, I already did it before it went too far.
I hate time for what it had stolen me.
Hey, God, is this your punishment to me?
.
.
I hate him.
He gave me the feeling that I've never expected to feel.
He made me feel special and loved.
He made my heart painfully skip a beat.
He made me feel suffocated with his dazzling smiles.
And now, he needed to leave me.
All I could do is to hold onto his promise.
Hey, Natsume… do you think time will not change our feelings?
…
Does love change with time? Or time change with love?
…
A year and a half had passed. She had already finished her senior year at Alice Academy and now ready to enter a university. Her last years at the Academy wasn't very easy especially after he left. She was in deep sorrow, wanting to see him every time she entered the classroom. But he wasn't there anymore. It had affected her greatly.
To her relief, her mother never left her side nor her friends. She knew they were afraid that she'd return doing her little game again, but no, she couldn't, even if she somehow wanted to. Her mind and heart were both seriously imprisoned by no other than that guy with brilliant crimson eyes whom she loved to stare at and get lost in depths of it. That one guy whose sincerity burns through her playful nature. That one guy who gave happiness when her world was slowly crumbling down. She was holding onto his promise, hoping that he would never break it.
It had become her habit to go to his favorite place every afternoon, hoping that one day, he would appear again. She would stay there until the sunset, never getting tired of admiring its beauty. Today was no exception. There she was again, sitting on the bench they used to sit together, staring as the sun slowly leaving the sky. She sighed and closed her eyes, letting the good old memory flow into her mind. Her face contorted into a sad, bittersweet smile, feeling joy and pain at the same time. Joy over their happy memories and pain that he wasn't there beside her.
"It's really beautiful here, right?" An amused, familiar voice echoed in her ears. It was so close, yet so far from her, cutting through the sacred silence ruthlessly. She nodded in agreement, her eyes still closed.
This wasn't new to Mikan anymore. Whenever she was thinking about him, she would randomly hear his voice, like it was the real thing. She could say that it was her way to lessen the pain she was feeling whenever she was missing him.
More memories flooded her thoughts as she relaxed herself on the bench. Without opening her eyes, she let the happy memories take over her system.
"Sleeping here is kind of dangerous, you know."
She chuckled, hearing his voice once again.
"I'm not sleeping, stupid partner." She mumbled, a smile crept on her face. Suddenly, she remembered his flushing face the first time they met, his sincere expression when he confessed his love to her, his smiling face whenever he was having fun, his determined look whenever he wanted to prove himself. Her smile grew bigger, feeling blissful over those memories.
"You are really scaring me right now. You are making funny faces." She heard him chuckle, it was like music to her ears.
Her train of thoughts had ended when a strong gush of wind hit her skin. The chilly breeze tangled her long auburn hair, caressing her pale cheek. She stiffened because as her little trance ended, she could feel someone's presence beside her.
She slowly opened her eyes, everything around her was blurry. She rubbed her eyes and blinked until her sight adjusted to her surroundings. There was a familiar figure beside him, wearing a black jacket and a matching baggy jeans. He was staring intently at the sky as the darkness took over. The light from the lamp post illuminated his calm face, a small smile was plastered on it. She closed her eyes once again as a faint shadow of nostalgia dawned on her face.
"I must have gone insane for real. First I was hearing him and now I'm seeing him. God forbid, I think I need mental help." She mumbled and uttered a dramatic sigh.
"I think so, too. You are kind of making me worried." The figure beside her replied. That gentle and soothing voice, it was the voice she always wanted to hear.
"I really miss you, partner." She mumbled, convinced that the figure beside her was just a fragment of her imagination.
"I do, too. I really do." He replied, putting his arms behind her back until his hand touched her shoulder. He gently pulled her closer to him.
She could feel those old emotions came rushing back at her. The hug felt so real, she could feel his warmth. She unconsciously rested her head on his broad chest, closing her eyes, feeling at ease and comfortable after a long time.
"Mikan..." His soothing voice called, while caressing her hair gently.
"Hm?" She breathed out.
"You don't actually think that you're only imagining things right now, do you?"
This sentence made her eyes snap open. She looked up, her wide eyes examining him. His hair had grown longer, but his face was still the same the last time she saw him. His crimson eyes were still behind those spectacles she bought for him. Her hand unconsciously moved to his cheek, caressing it gently. He shivered, it had been so long since he last felt her touch. But to his surprise, her gentle caress became a painful pinch.
"Ow. That hurts." He flinched.
Her hazel eyes stared unbelievingly on the guy beside her. She stood up, took a step back, her face showed nothing but disbelief.
"You're...real?"
She saw him trying to stifle a chuckle. He stood up and swiftly approached her. He took her hands and kissed them gently.
"Of course, I am," He replied, with small smile on his face. "...but you were really funny earlier." He added, trying his best to suppress his laughter.
He thought she would smack him or slap him for being an idiot but to his surprise, she didn't. Instead, he felt a pair of arms snaked around his neck. He saw her tip-toed, trying to reach his height and without a warning, he felt something warm touched his lips.
He smiled as she kissed him passionately. He returned the kiss which he really missed in the past year. Their hearts pounded erratically as they shared a short, sweet kiss.
After a short while, she broke the kiss, not removing her arms from his neck.
She stared right to his crimson eyes, her face flushed, faking a very disappointed expression.
"I-I just really need to make sure you are the real thing. I've been having hallucinations lately." She reasoned, trying to be convincing as possible.
"I'm sure you do. You were concern about your mental health a while ago. I'm sorry if I'm the one who caused you this." He said, sincerity was on his voice. Mikan couldn't help but to smile at him, for she missed seeing that expression from his face.
"Don't flatter yourself. I still haven't forgiven you for leaving me. It has been more than a year now, you know." She said, diverting her gaze away from him. "You will get your punishment later, partner." She added, feeling her heart thumping hard inside her chest.
"I did promise that I will come back for you, right?" He said as he gently removed her arms around his neck. He intertwined her small hands with his, enjoying the warmth it was giving him.
He had fulfilled his promise. She had her doubts but her trust on his sincerity weighs heavier than her doubts. She was glad she waited. She was glad she trusted him.
"You also kept your promise, have you?" He asked with a small smile.
She snorted. "Of course, I did. You're still my partner. I'm still your responsibility." She replied, faking a childish tone. Natsume released a laugh and let go of her hands.
"I will never leave you, ever again." His hands found its way to her cheeks and cupped them blandly. He lowered his head until their forehead touched.
Like the last time, she believed him. She would entrust her heart to him. Only to him.
"I love you, Natsume." She confessed, her flushed face illuminated by the moon. Her soft and brilliant hazel eyes stared directly to his vivid red ones.
He felt his face heated up again, his smile never leaving his face. It was the first time he heard her say it, and it honestly made him extremely happy.
"I love you, too, Mikan. I always will." He murmured, his gaze not leaving hers. "...promise me, no matter what happens, we'll stay together."
Mikan chuckled softly. "You don't have to worry… I promise."
And she was right…
He never had to worry.
For Mikan Sakura… the biggest tease that the students of Alice Academy had ever seen…
Had been hooked…
Had settled down…
Had fallen in love…
…
She never believed in love.
She believed that it was just an excuse used by people who feared being alone.
She never feared being alone.
That was why she never thought she'd fall in love by any slimmest chance.
.
But then... She met him.
End of Story
…
Time is too slow for those who wait;
Too swift for those who fear;
Too long for those who grief;
Too short for those who rejoice;
But for those who love...
Time is Eternity.
-Henry van Dyke
Dedicated to an old friend, whom knew everything except how I truly felt. I hope you'd find your real happiness for I've already found mine.
I'm sorry, I could not give you a shoulder to lean on in the present, like how I used to in the past.
Time has changed me.
- J. H.
Completed 5/5/2016. 8:30PM. Oslo, Norway.
Thanks for reading. Have a great day.