Of Blood and Serpents

First Year: Chapter Ten

Secrets

A/N- A very big thank you to brianna-xox who has volunteered her help to me with this story and is helping me edit every chapter as well as offering me support and feedback!

Draco's nanny ushered them inside the house. The witch was a stern looking woman with black hair tied into a tight bun and a rather blank expression. Narcissa handed little Draco off to the woman and led them to the sitting room.

"Yes, well where shall we begin?" Lucius drawled as he invited Lily to sit in a stiff looking armchair. Lily wasn't sure anymore. "What has Severus told you? Perhaps we can begin there." His eyes glittered like hard chipped ice. Lily began haltingly recalling Severus' words to her, not having any idea of the kind of potential danger she was in.

"Only that I was left to him a long time ago, by a very powerful wizard." She said, unintentionally lowering her voice as she began to speak. Her throat felt tight when she spoke of him. "My…my friends at say that Severus and you were involved with 'you know who'" she said, for lack of a better name to call him. "They said he was an evil wizard." She finished and Lucius scoffed.

"Evil and good are just obstacles for those on the path to greatness. Only small minds lack the ability to grasp that," he spat. "However, what Severus told you was true. A great wizard, our Lord, left you to Severus some years ago. Severus and I were involved, as your 'friends' said with the Dark Lord and his uprising. He was a great wizard, the greatest perhaps since Salazar Slytherin himself." Lucius stood and walked to a tray where a crystal decanter sat with amber liquid inside. He poured himself a helping of the liquid before continuing. "The wizarding world's very foundations are deteriorating. Mudbloods, half-breeds and muggles are rotting our world to the very core. The Dark Lord sought to excise the filth that deign to call themselves wizards, to make the wizarding world great again and to bring those who were worthy into power." He finished with a small sigh, taking a small sip of the amber liquid and gently coating his tongue with it before swallowing. "Your destiny, your heritage, is to follow in his footsteps, his teachings." Lucius' eyes glittered in the firelight as he leaned in. Lily averted her gaze numbly and silence filled the space between them.

"Was he my father?" She asked finally, surprising herself with how strong her voice was.

"I imagine so," Lucius said silkily, but Lily frowned, catching his words.

"But you don't know for certain," she said watching Lucius carefully.

"I know he wanted to keep you safe, hidden. Even from his most devoted followers." Lily nodded, thinking back, remembering a cold hand in hers, pulling her along, cold nipping her cheeks… a small hissing whisper in her ear.
"Now my dear, all that remains is your side of the bargain," Lucius said with an arched brow. Lily felt raw. Lucius' information having barely processed, she was suddenly eager to get away from them, away from the crackling fire away from his cold gaze. She wanted it over with, done. So she gave her secret carelessly, eagerly even. Impatient to be gone.

"I speak parseltongue." She said simply, not meeting their gazes, as 'Narcissa who had been a silent participant' gasped. She did not see the look the two shared.

"My my my… that only confirms it, doesn't it Narcissa," Lucius drawled slowly. "The only remaining parselmouth was He Who Must Not Be Named himself, after all."

"M-may I go home now." Lily said suddenly, feeling empty almost, hollow.

"Won't you stay for dinner, my dear?" Narcissa asked almost in a sweet tone, but there was a hard edge to her voice. Lily didn't catch it though; she was far away in thought, barely in the same room as them. She simply shook her head looking distant. Narcissa frowned slightly before pulling a smile. "Well dear, you must be quite tired; I'll take you home then. Come along." Narcissa offered Lily her hand, which she took while giving a small nod to Lucius. She hadn't felt so small in a long time.

Lily arrived home and was relieved to see Severus dozing with Bee on his lap. Had it been any other time she might have smiled or laughed, but she had no laughter in her at the moment. Hunger clawed at her belly, but she ignored it, slipping silently upstairs to her bedroom and quietly closing the door behind her. She collapsed on the bed in a heap, but found she couldn't sleep. She was replaying the moment that Lucius' cane hit Mrs. Weasley's leg, the petty cruelty of it and Narcissa's snide sneer that followed. Such things didn't sit right with Lily and she wasn't sure if they ever would. Is that how Severus was, petty and cruel? Lily tossed and turned hopelessly, but lay still when the door creaked open and Severus poked his head in to see Lily laying in a lump beneath her covers. She held her breath until he left and then sighed, rubbing her tired, sleepless eyes. Awful thoughts kept bubbling up, keeping Lily from sleep. 'You're just a burden, a pawn to Severus' was one particularly nasty one that wouldn't go away. 'And If Charlie and Tonks find out who you are they'll never look at you the same, let alone speak to you.' And another thought that made her sweat and her stomach churn. 'If Severus finds out you went behind his back he'll toss you out.' A part of Lily burned to speak to Severus, and another part of her never wanted him to ever find out about her betrayal. She'd promised him never to tell anyone about her parseltongue ability and she had broken that promise… Lily nearly cried when she realized how careless she'd been, so greedy for the information that she'd just given it up. Well now she had it, and she hated herself and truly felt wretched.

Narcissa swept back into their sitting room after escorting Lily home. Lucius was waiting for her looking so pleased that Narcissa found herself smiling. She approached her husband from behind and slid her arms around him, pressing her cheek against his back.

"What now. My love?" She crooned and felt her husband's chuckle.

"Simple, we bring her home."

By the time Lily returned to school, she had dark circles under her eyes and looked quite haggard. Luckily though, Carmella still wasn't speaking to her and didn't say much, for which Lily was grateful. Every night her thoughts drifted back to the conversation between her and Lucius. To her relief there were no plans to see Lucius and Narcissa anytime soon. What wasn't good was she felt Severus watching her, but then again, she watched him too. She watched him with dark eyes full of questions. She watched the way he spoke to others, the way he carried himself. She thought of Lucius' words, his petty cruelty and deep hatred and she compared them to Severus. Was Severus really all those things? She wondered if she had simply been blind to it. He was cruel after all, and scathing; he loathed stupidity, but for the most part he treated the students equally - although he did pay more attention to the Slytherin students, that much was true.

Lily did manage to take some comfort from her friends, Charlie and Tonks and she found herself studying less and partaking in their company more. Studying required quite a bit of thought and Lily was quite tired of thinking, thank you very much.

"You seem sort of… distant." Tonks' commented one day, then laughed. "I mean more than usual, ever since you got back from holidays really." It seemed as if Tonks was finally catching on to her habits, although Charlie was still oblivious.

"She seems normal to me," he said with a blink, before biting noisily into his apple. It was spring and the Hogwarts grounds were finally getting more sun. Lily squinted into the bright light, not sure what to say but wanting to finally confide in her friends.

"It has to do with where I came from," she answered slowly. "If I say, you can't tell." She gave them both very serious looks. Their expressions sobered and they nodded in unison, scooting in closer from where they sat.

"Severus isn't my real father. He was sort of supposed to take care of me until someone came back. But we aren't sure if the person who dropped me off is my parent, or if I was taken from somewhere else. Severus won't talk about it, but I thought the Malfoys would know more, so I asked them without telling Severus…" Lily took a breath, her voice feeling scratchy from having not used it for such a longwinded speech for quite a long time. A part of her wanted to tell her friends the truth, but really she was frightened to. The very thought about speaking about him made her throat clam up for some reason.

"Blimey… I'd be worried about crossing him too. I mean look how bad he is just in class!" Charlie said loudly and Tonks smacked him on shoulder for Lily's sake, shaking her hair out which was now long and black like Lily's.

"I bet the Malfoys didn't just talk about it without something in return," Tonks said, looking very sympathetic with very Lily-like green eyes. Lily shrugged uncomfortably beneath that gaze. She didn't get the information for free, no, but that was also something she wasn't willing to share. Guilt gnawed at her belly with a hint of shame. Why did she feel the need to be so secretive even from her friends?

"There are things I want to ask Severus now, but then I'd have to tell him what I did…" She averted the subject from the Malfoys smoothly (and very Slytherin-like).

"That's tough," Charlie said with a frown. "What do you think he'll do if he finds out? Will he punish you?"

"He can be mean, but I think he'll just be angry," she said.

"Better get it out and in the open then, before the Malfoys go behind your back and tell him themselves. That's just like something they would do!" Tonks said with a confident nod and Lily felt a little queasy at the thought, but she thought perhaps they were right. She felt some relief by finally talking to someone about her burden and finally smiled a little.

Lily wrote Severus a note requesting to have dinner with him. She saw him reading it at the head table during the dinner feast. His black eyes picked her out of the gaggle of Slytherins and she stared back intently before getting back to her food. As the feast ended, she felt his presence and looked up to see him standing there, her stomach tightened nervously and she swallowed.

"Tomorrow night if you wish; my quarters at 6pm sharp," Severus said in a clipped, formal tone. Lily nodded in agreement, suddenly not particularly hungry for the Pumpkin Pasty she had on her plate. Severus swept away as quickly as he come making several students down the row jump in their seats when they noticed him.

Lily spent the night looking at the stars during her Astronomy class, which was a blessing and a curse because she couldn't sleep, but she found astronomy quite dull and it did little to occupy her mind. It was agony to wait, yet all too quickly she was standing in front of the painting to his room.

"Don't just stand there," Severus snapped and Lily nearly jumped out of her skin. Severus had come up from behind her in the hall quite silently.

"Sorry..." she mumbled, knowing his mood was only going to get worse after she spoke to him. She moved out of the way for him to open the portrait.

"Lineage," he said to the portrait and the door swung open. Lily might have smiled at the irony, but she wasn't in a smiling mood so her face stayed drawn and somber.

"Are you staying ahead in your classes?" He asked, perhaps for lack of anything else to say. He knew that she had asked him to dinner to speak with him, finally having decided she would tell him what she'd been hiding. He knew whatever it was he wouldn't like it, and he suspected very strongly it had everything to do with the Malfoys.

"Yes…" She said and drew a breath. "I want to tell you something, but I know you'll be angry," Lily said, facing him and avoiding the armchair which looked welcoming near his hearth. She felt that if she did anything else but speak at that very instant, she would lose her courage completely.

"I suspect it will as well," Severus drawled, crossing his arms and quirking his brow. "What is it then? Out with it," he snapped.

"I-I asked the Malfoys about where I came from, about you and the war." She kept her eyes fixed to a spot on the rug beneath her feet. Her throat was tight and her stomach uneasy. "They promised to tell me in exchange for something," she continued haltingly, anxiously peeking up at Severus through her parted hair.

"What?" His voice dripped sourly.

"A secret. I told them my secret." She managed to spit out and bit her lip. There was silence as her words settled.

"Stupid child," he hissed. "Stupid, foolish girl," he spat through gritted teeth and squeezed his eyes shut. He knew he wouldn't like what she said, but of course that didn't lessen his anger.

"They told me things about him," Lily whispered and he saw that her eyes were closed and she was trembling faintly. "They told me things about you…" She suddenly raised her eyes to look at him, her voice stronger and clearer. "Is it all true?" She demanded. Her eyes burned with something as she looked at him, condemnation? He felt the urge to look away.

"Yes," he said simply.

"I just don't understand how you could be like them. So hateful!" Lily blinked back the stinging in her eyes, refusing to cry. Severus was surprised to find he wasn't angry anymore, only very weary suddenly. He closed his eyes and sagged slightly.

"This may be difficult for you to understand, but there are things at work you can't begin to imagine." His dark eyes opened and he captured her gaze in his, holding it firmly. He had made a decision in that moment as she stared at him with her unfathomable gaze. He needed to tell her, she needed to know… "All I ask is for you to be patient for a time." Lily felt the intensity of his gaze and the tumultuous emotions in her abated.

"For how long?" She asked, feeling burgeoning curiosity in her belly. What could he have to tell her that would possibly change what Malfoy said?

"Until I am ready," he said waspishly and Lily nodded, feeling sorry for pressing him. They settled into a surprisingly pleasant dinner, with Severus inquiring further on her studies and grade hopes for her year end tests. Finally Lily stood, ready to go to bed.

"Goodnight Severus."

"Goodnight." Severus stared into the crackling fire of his hearth for several minutes before he stood, stretching for a moment to alleviate post dinner lethargy that was seeping in. He made his way swiftly to Dumbledore's office, finding himself in front of the Griffin statue rather quickly with his long strides.

"Pop Tart," he said crisply, frowning as those ridiculous words came out of his mouth.

"Must you always have a ridiculous password?" Severus asked slightly irritably as he entered Dumbledore's office.

"It does bring me some amusement to do so, I must admit." Dumbledore chuckled. "I presume you didn't come all the way to my office to complain, Professor Snape."

"No, I've just had a conversation with the girl."

"You mean young Lily, yes?" Dumbledore interrupted before Severus could continue and Severus waved his hand impatiently with a curl in his lip.

"Yes Lillian, the girl. She has just admitted to me that while visiting with the Malfoys she traded information." Severus continued to explain in a low tone what Lily had told him, and of the secret she traded for the information.

"Clearly your explanation was not sufficient for the girl." Severus glared at Dumbledore, bristling.

"I told her what was needed."

"Alas, but not what she needed to hear."

"Must you be so insufferable?"

"Yes." Dumbledore smiled quite cheekily. "I must," he said with great amusement. "How do you wish to proceed, Severus?" He asked, perfectly serious again. Severus paced Dumbledore's office, lost in thought.

"The girl is too soft and kind to believe in the Slytherin purity nonsense, but it is becoming dangerous. She's already an outcast with her own house, but should the Malfoys find out…" It was such a delicate situation: should Lillian openly rebel against the Malfoys' beliefs as Severus believed she would eventually, it would lower his credibility as a supporter of the Dark Lord, and in turn put them both in danger. "I believe she should know the truth, and I should like to begin training her," Severus said finally after his silence.

"Are you sure it's not your own feelings for the girl that make you wish to tell her the truth?" Severus fixed Dumbledore with a glare, but did not deny his words and the old man smiled, stroking his beard gently. "I should like to speak with the girl before I decide."

"Very well," Severus said crisply and left.

The truth of the matter was Severus did care for the girl, more than he cared to admit, and he found he did not like the way her green eyes had pierced him.

"I just don't understand how you could be like them. So hateful!" It had been like when Lily stood in front of him so many years ago, with tears in her eyes.

"I don't understand Sev!" She had reason to have tears in her eyes; he was after all turning away from her and into the darkness. Lillian had looked at him with that same hurt, her own green eyes shimmering with unshed tears. He felt as if he'd been stabbed.

He didn't want this Lily to believe the worst in him, even if it were true. Even he wasn't sure if it was true anymore. He'd acted as a shadow for so long going back and forth between the sides. At first it was for Lily, all for Lily… but now… now he was unsure what he truly believed in. All he knew was that he wanted the girl to be prepared.

Lily felt relieved having it all off her chest and with the year end tests fast approaching, she was finally able to put her head down and study with ease. She broke her studies with trips to the Forbidden Forest with Hagrid whenever she could manage. It was a wonderful way for her to relax, as she found the forest quite tranquil and re-energizing.

Severus did not bring up what they spoken of again, Lily yearned to ask but restrained herself, knowing he would talk when he was ready and not a minute before.

Finally, school exams came and went. Lily felt quite confident about her results overall; even her second year potions seemed to go quite smoothly. Lily dreamily thought of the home waiting for her in Spinners End: the dust motes dancing in the air as sunlight streamed though the curtains while she thumbed through a thick leather bound tome basking in the warmth of the light. Or digging through the loamy earth behind the house tending the garden. The tomato plants should be fully grown and hanging ripe with fruit. Lily was dreaming of a particularly juicy tomato, when suddenly whispers near her made her blink and straighten.

"Who's that with the headmaster?" Lily turned and looked to see a strange man wearing a bowler cap approaching with Dumbledore who had a troubled look on his face. Lily was sitting in the Great Hall having her last Hogwarts breakfast before going home with Severus. Dumbledore's eyes seemed to sweep the Slytherin table searchingly; when they reached her they stopped and Lily's stomach flipped anxiously as they approached.

"Mr. Talbus, this is Miss Lillian Snape. Lily, Mr. Talbus is from the Ministry of Magic." Lily stood with a perplexed expression and took Mr. Talbus' hand as it was offered to her with a small shake.

"Hello young lady. I'm with the Ministry of Magic Custody and Care of Magical Children Department. It's come under to attention that you have no legal guardianship to speak of and your current guardianship is being contested." Lily felt as if her stomach had been kicked. Her expression must have betrayed her shock and confusion so he continued. "Now don't you worry, this will all be sorted soon enough. But for now you'll have to come with me and be put into Ministry care until it's all sorted," he said, giving her a reassuring pat on the shoulder. Lily immediately shrugged off the strange man's touch, her face screwing up into a scowl as she looked between the ministry man and Dumbledore.

"What about Severus?" She asked in a small voice.

"Your current uh, 'guardian,'" He coughed, "will be informed via letter of your hearing and the family contesting his right will be there as well."

"What family?" Lily knew it suddenly before he said it, feeling as if a hand was squeezing her heart.

"That would be Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy."

"I believe Severus would like to hear about this before you take young Miss Snape." Dumbledore said in a quiet gravelly rumble.

"Its quite unnecessary Headmaster, everything he needs to know is in his letter," the man said, withdrawing a letter from his coat pocket. "The court hearing dates all in here, now we really should be going." The man extended his arm as if Lily was meant to take it, but Lily simply glowered at him, staying rooted to the spot. She felt the stares of several students on her, and the room seemed quieter as if conversations had stopped to listen in.

"I want Severus." She felt like a petulant child saying it, but fear gripped her. She wouldn't leave without seeing him first, he wouldn't let her be taken away.

"Now, now, let's not be difficult." The ministry man's eyes darkened slightly.

"Ah, Severus, there you are." Severus had been walking to the Great Hall when he noticed students staying hushed and staring at two adults and a student standing by the Slytherin table. He could see one was Dumbledore and the others…. He recognized Lily and frowned. What could this be about?

"Headmaster." He drawled, noting Lily had a panicked look about her, seeming paler than usual as she looked at him with almost a desperate look in her eyes.

"Ah, Mister Snape."

"Professor Snape," He snapped and the man's lip curled slightly. "What is this about?" He demanded and the man seemed to puff up slightly as he shoved a letter into Severus's hands.

"Your guardianship of Lily is being contested by the Malfoys Severus. Mr. Talbus here has come to take Lily until the court hearing." A wave of rage swept through Severus and he found his eyes trained on Lily who looked suddenly hurt and averted her gaze.

He had looked so livid when he turned to her that Lily knew he was angry at her. It was her fault the Malfoys had taken a deeper interest after all. A pain speared through Lily's chest when Severus looked at her like that and she immediately lost her stubborn edge and took the ministry man's arm without looking at Severus. Severus knew he'd hurt her, but at the moment was too angry to care.

"Is. That. So." He uttered each word slowly and even the Ministry man shrank back slightly as Severus balled his fists at his sides.

"Yes… Er well we should be going. The hearing date is inside should you wish to remain the sole guardian of the girl. Come now," he said, ushering Lily with him. Lily's cheeks burned beneath the weight of Severus' gaze, unable to look up and bear the brunt of his anger.

"Come Severus. We should speak." Severus watched Lily leave, and it was only once she was out of his sight that he felt a hollow pang in his chest. He hadn't even said goodbye.

A/N- If you've made it this far and want to read the next chapter then please review! I'll keep toiling away doing my best to keep you entertained. Feedback is always appreciated as well :)