Immortal: I tossed the word around in my head, I was so confused, surely Kilgharrah couldn't mean that literally, I may be magical but I'm not that magical…or was I? My emotions must have been playing out on my face for a while because Kilgharrah interrupted me.

'I do mean it literally Merlin.'

'How?' I asked utterly confused 'You mean I'm going to live forever?'

'It is difficult to explain young Warlock,' Kilgharrah said.

'Well you had best find a way of making it easier Kilgharrah before I lose my mind!' I said my voice rose slightly.

'I didn't want to tell you when we first met, you were so young and troubled about Arthur and your destiny…I didn't have the heart to tell you then.'

'So you lied to me?' I asked still confused

'No I just held information from you until you were ready.'

'And you've decided I'm ready now?' I asked.

'I'm afraid so,' he said his gruff voice lower with sadness.

I sighed, my stomach was a net of nerves that were fidgeting around making me feel slightly sick. I knew that whatever Kilgharrah was going to tell me next was going to change my life. I angrily stomped my foot into the ground, when would destiny let me make my own choices? Could I even make my own choices if my future was already foretold? My life had already had so many life altering changes thrown in, I didn't know if I could take any more.

'Then tell me,' I said determinedly.

'Yours, was not a normal birth Merlin, if you had asked your mother, she would have told you how you were born swirling gold orbs…you nearly gave her and her midwife a heart attack but your mother pleaded with her to keep it a secret when she realised that you were somebody very special Merlin'

'Why didn't she tell me?' I asked

'She didn't believe it was important, your mother as you well know has no gift of magic herself therefore she assumed it was a common thing with magical babies however you are the only magical baby there has and will ever be.'

'I don't understand' I said.

'Magic comes to us in all stages of life young warlock…for most humans they must study it when they realise they have a talent for it, which usually comes at later stages in life…but you Merlin, were magical as soon as you came into this world, you're very being radiates magic because that is essentially what you are'

'You're telling me I am magic?' I asked confused.

'In a way… destiny and prophecy foretold your coming and the magic of the land made you to fulfil those goals.'

I paused as I tried to take all of this in 'so you're saying I'm not my mother's and father's child… I was created by magic?' I asked.

'Of course not Merlin, if you need proof that you are you're mother and fathers child you only need to look at your gift as a dragon lord…you would not have it if your father had not died to pass it on to you?'

'Then I still don't understand,' I said.

'You were the right baby Merlin at the right time, magic blessed you and gave you the powers you now have today and many you still don't understand,' Kilgharrah said.

'So where does me being Immortal come into all of this?' I asked

'By blessing you, you became a creature of pure magic like the dragons which probably explains our deep connection we have Merlin… despite us being dragon and dragon Lord our connection runs deeper than that…you can feel it can't you?' Kilgharrah asked.

I considered it. In all the books I had read about dragons and dragon lords, they always talked about the bond of respect between dragon and dragon lord, but never had it spoken about the deep connection that I felt with Kilgharrah. Something connected us that went deeper than the dragon lord bond.

'We're kin aren't we?' I asked.

'Yes, in every sense of the word,' Kilgharrah said 'when magic blessed you it gave you certain qualities of the dragons…for only we are born with magic…no other creature is.'

'So what dragon like qualities have I got then?' I joked 'can I breathe fire?'

'No because you are not a dragon Merlin…just because you are like us doesn't mean you are us.'

'I'm so confused' I said.

'By being born with magic you are automatically presented with certain gifts that any creature born with magic would be given whether you are human dragon or ant.'

'But you are the only creatures born of magic so are the only ones to receive them' I said gradually beginning to understand.

'Yes and one of these traits is the gift of immortality.'

'But I'm not invincible Kilgharrah I've been injured before… hell I've nearly died plenty of times,' I pointed out.

'Well of course you have…don't be mistaken Merlin you can be killed just like a dragon…by poison by sword by magic…but if none of these things kill you Merlin, then you will…endure.'

'What do you mean,' I asked.

'Like the dragons Merlin your magic will sustain you for ever,' He said.

I tried to take it all in. Magic had made me different but I had never realised just how different until this moment. Life was obvious to most people: You are born, you grow up, you hopefully fall in love and marry and generally live well so you can die a peaceful death with no regrets, I now realised that that was now taken away from me.

I felt myself fall to my knees in shock. I would linger in this world long past all of my friends and my love, Morgana. She would grow old and die and I would watch as she left the world without me. What was the point if I couldn't have the reward of death? I had never seen death as a good thing but now that the expectation of it had been taken away I was overwhelmed with the heart breaking situation that I would wander the world alone.

'It is a lot to take in I understand Merlin,' Kilgharrah said.

And suddenly I knew how he felt, to be the last of his kind forever alone. One day in the far, far future when the human race finally became extinct and succumbed to inevitability me and Kilgharrah would be the only ones left in its deserted land with nothing but memory and pain.

'I don't want to be alone,' I said tears leaking from my face.

'That is my point Merlin, this bond with Morgana has affected her as well,' Kilgharrah said.

'What do you mean?' I asked.

'Your magic is strong, stronger than hers and destiny never expected for a magic mate bond to take place now that is has it has altered Morgana's fate as well,' Kilgharrah said.

'She's immortal too?' I asked.

'I'm afraid so, your magic being the stronger of the pair has brought her up to an equal standing, as the magic mate bond means not living without the other.'

'So it's robbed her of a normal life completely,' I said.

Kilgharrah had no answer and I felt sobs take over. I had robbed Morgana of so much with this magic mate bond and now I realised that I had robbed her of her right to die. Her right to have a normal existence…she would never forgive me. I couldn't live with her rejection, she would hate me despite the bond she would force herself to hate me… I just knew it.

'There is something else as well Merlin.'

'Oh, fantastic!' I yelled anger was catching up with me now that the whole situation was sinking into my brain 'Just add to my misery Kilgharrah have one last go.'

'You can never have children Merlin,' Kilgharrah said he sounded so pitiful now like he knew he was breaking my heart.

He lay down on his belly and curled around me as I fell to the floor in a heap of disbelief; I knew that if he was human he would be holding me right now.

'Why not?' I asked sniffing.

'It is do with the blessing magic gave you at birth, to be given so much power Merlin…well the world needed to be balanced out,' Kilgharrah said.

'By robbing me of the chance to have a family?' I asked.

'Yes, don't you see, you would be able to sire a whole stream of pure magical babies imagine the consequences of it, if some of them went bad the world would be thrown into catastrophe.'

'But if I raised them correctly…'I said but Kilgharrah cut me off.

'No Merlin, don't you see magic chose you because it knew that you were pure of heart the only being in this land that would not be corrupted by power…your potential offspring would be tempted and it would throw the balance out of the world.'

I didn't reply. I had never imagined myself with a family the possibility had seemed so far ahead in the future, but again it was a choice that destiny had decided to rob me of. It had robbed Morgana too, the bond of magic mate meant that she would not be able to love or even like another man enough to want to have his child. She would be barren and shackled to my side so completely.

'She'll hate me Kilgharrah,' I said.

'One cannot hate what makes it whole,' he said in reply.

'Where does Arthur come into all of this?' I asked.

'Arthur is you're destiny for this lifetime Merlin,' Kilgharrah said.

'And after he is dead?' I asked.

'Yours and Morgana's journey will not stop with him…he is just the beginning of people's lives you will change and help.'

'That sounds like a noble cause Kilgharrah but it's not fair…it's not fair at all,' I said and tears took over again.

'How will I explain this to everyone…to Morgana?' I asked.

'Merlin may I suggest you don't start with her…start with Arthur right now you need your friend and he needs you.'

I considered this. I wasn't ready to face Morgana yet, I needed comfort that only my best friend could give, I needed Arthur and remembering his breakdown from earlier he clearly needed me. It was getting dark and I looked around in shock. We had talked the afternoon away and suddenly the pain from my separation from Morgana hit me.

It wasn't so bad but it was there. She must be worried but I was in no state to talk to her. I climbed to my feet and turned to Kilgharrah.

'You've given me quite a surprise this time Kilgharrah,' I said

'It was not something I wanted to tell you young warlock, your blessing is both a curse and a gift…but know that I will always be here should you need me,' he said.

I bowed in response and pressed my forehead against his snout in farewell and then set off back towards the castle my mind in whirl over Kilgharrah's confessions.

I stumbled into Arthur's chambers thanking god that he was alone I'm sure that the sight of me would have terrified anyone else but Arthur new differently however. He was instantly by my side hoisting my arm around his side and led me over to the bed.

'Merlin what on earth is the matter you look like death?' Arthur said pressing a cold hand to my forehead to gauge my temperature and then passed me a goblet of water from which I took a sip.

'Is it Morgana, your bond? Did something happen? Did someone attack you?' he asked frantically and I shook my head.

'No,' I croaked and looked away from his concerned eyes, my magic had been such a shock for him, was he ready for this?

'Is there something wrong with the dragon?' he asked and I shook my head in response.

He sighed 'Do you want me to get Morgana?' he asked.

'No!' I practically screamed and he backed away looking confused.

'What's going on Merlin?' Arthur asked sitting next to me on the bed.

'Kilgharrah told me some stuff,' I said lamely still refusing to meet his eyes.

'What kind of stuff?' Arthur asked.

'Life altering stuff.'

There was the longest of pauses whilst Arthur looked at me.

'You know Merlin, I know I haven't been very supportive about the whole magic thing, but I consider you family and my closest friend I would never think differently of you.'

'You might after this,' I said pitifully.

'Just tell me,' Arthur said and raised my chin so I was looking at him in the eyes.

'I am a child of magic…I am magic's child I'm immortal like the dragons' I said. And I lowered my head into my hands and sobbed.

'Do you mean that literally?' he asked shocked and I almost laughed that he had said the same thing I had said, we were so alike.

'I'm afraid so...you will live a long and happy life Arthur and I will not be able to follow you when you leave this world.'

He stared at me with round eyes and I couldn't even begin to contemplate what was going through his mind, probably how much of a freak I was.

'You can't die?' he asked.

'Oh I can die alright…stab me with your sword and I'm gone but leave me…and I'll endure,' I said hating the word.

'What about Morgana and your bond?' Arthur asked.

'Oh I've dragged her into this too,' I said spitefully hating myself all over again.

'Maybe it's a good thing Merlin, I mean you won't be so alone,' Arthur said.

'Don't you understand…My life will never have completion and neither will hers we'll wander this earth to the end of its days and have to watch whilst the people we love leave us…how can we make friends knowing that one day they'll just be a distant memory?' I asked pleading at him to understand.

'I'll be honest mate it doesn't sound like a life I'd want,' Arthur said honestly.

'There's more…I can never give Morgana a child,' I said 'My magic stops me.'

'Why?' Arthur asked incredulously.

'To stop them becoming evil tyrants that this power would give them…give anyone to anyone but me,' I said.

'I don't know what to say.' Arthur said.

I sniffed and pulled myself together, 'Well it's out in the open I suppose I'll just have to live with it and live with Morgana's hate for me,' I said.

Her name brought the ache back to the forefront of my mind I wanted her comfort I wanted her to hold me and tell me everything would be okay. That she forgave me for taking away her free will and that she would love me for the rest of our days. It was very unlikely and my magic mate bond screamed in outrage.

'Merlin, Morgana loves you, I love you, Gwen and Gaius love you, you could grow horns you could have pink hair and nothing would stop us loving you less, despite everything you're still Merlin you're still my insufferable servant with a talent for trouble and disrespect,' Arthur said placing his hand round my shoulders and I couldn't help the laugh that escaped me.

'That means a lot thank you,' I said.

'She'll forgive you Merlin, she won't even be angry she'll just be worried about you,' Arthur said speaking over my unvoiced concerns over Morgana.

'I've restricted her life and expanded it in ways that are irreversible,' I said 'Would you forgive me?' I asked him

'I'm not the one who has the unpleasant task of loving you Merlin,' Arthur joked and I snorted and nudged him.

'No,' He said seriously now 'If I was Morgana I would make it my life's mission to make you happy so that you wouldn't feel the pang of loneliness that I'm sure will be a big part of both of your lives,' Arthur said.

'I appreciate your honesty Arthur,' I said.

'Merlin, you're still him, you're still my friend nothing has changed,' he said.

'I don't want to forget you,' I said and tears leaked from my eyes again.

I didn't want to forget any of them, Arthur's sarcasm or Gwaine's pranks, Gaius's logic and love of science and Gwen's open nature. I didn't want to forget Camelot my home which I had grown to love so much. I didn't want to forget my mother and her loving ways and beautiful smile. I couldn't forget these people, but faced with such a long future I wondered how it would be possible to recall everything.

'How could you forget me your arrogant king who you live to torment?' Arthur said then was serious 'Live for today Merlin, not for tomorrow.'

I considered that, I would have to talk to Morgana tomorrow, tomorrow I would have to face the fact that Camelot was in danger from an unknown foe. Tomorrow I would have to wake up and realise that I would never have a family or a child to call my own. But for today, I could be me; today I could put all of that to the back of my mind and focus on the smiling face of my King, my best friend who I would always protect.

Let me know what you think?