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No Going Back

"Why have you returned?"

The words sounded colder than I expected and I flushed in shame. I shouldn't be hostile towards Christine, though I found her returning presence bothered me.

Christine's eyes dropped to her hands, which she was fiddling with. Her hair curtained around her face as she chewed on her bottom lip, a blush highlighting her cheeks.

"I was hoping to rectify things with…my angel. Perhaps I may talk with him?"

I instantly shook my head. "I don't think that's a good idea at the moment. He's not in a suitable place, due to your choice in leaving."

She frowned, her gaze remaining lowered. "I realize I do not have any entitlement but I just wish to see that he is alright."

"He's as alright as he can be and if you are thinking of leaving again after this little discussion, then perhaps it would be best if you simply left him now."

"It is quite alright Charlotte. Would you allow us to converse more privately?"

I frowned at the sound of Erik's voice from behind me, watching as Christine's head bounced upwards quickly. Her eyes widened as she glanced behind me, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth again.

"Fine," I agreed reluctantly, turning back towards him.

He had reapplied his mask and I couldn't help but wonder if it was because he didn't want to frighten Christine any further. It seemed a shame if he felt that the only way he could do that was by covering his face. I hoped more than anything that she would learn to be more accepting of him so he didn't have to worry so much.

I turned back to Christine to see that she was still watching him and I reluctantly headed past her. I knew that whatever she had to say, he would wish to hear.

I headed down the few steps in the middle of the lair, shivering at the chill that welcomed me as soon as I stepped into the lake once more. I glanced backwards once more to see Christine following Erik into the small room, hoping that tonight wouldn't end completely disastrously.

I slowly waded through the current, glancing round as I did. The boat was pulled towards the edge of the lake and I breathed a sigh at the sight of the Vicomte slowly making his way back towards the entrance of the lair. I didn't realize how relieved I felt at his returning presence until now. I hadn't believed his promise to come back. I had wanted to but even with a confession hanging over his departure, I didn't. But then I felt annoyed, annoyed that he had allowed Christine to come back to talk to Erik when he was in such an adverse place at the moment. I knew he couldn't have exactly held her back but he could have tried to persuade her to leave it for tonight.

"Why did you allow Christine to come back here to speak to him?"

He rolled his eyes. "I am hardly in a position to forbid her not to, given that she is no longer my fiancée."

I flushed at his words. I had forgotten about that, with everything that had happened tonight.

"Well I cannot understand what she wishes to talk so urgently about, given all that has happened."

He offered a shrug in reply. "Perhaps she has realized that she does not wish to subsist without him."

I frowned, eyeing him curiously. He seemed calm as he said that, as though the thought didn't bother him.

"Does that thought not bother you at all anymore?"

"I do not think he is worthy of her but it is not my place to judge if she decides that she wants to remain with him."

"You are wrong about him. If anyone is unworthy, it is her." I scoffed, before I began to make my way back towards the lair.

"How can you say that, given your friendship? It seems a little harsh. And may I remind you of our earlier conversation? He is still the murderer."

I instantly turned back at that. "Perhaps I am being harsh but he is not the monster you believe him to be. He is a man like anyone else but the difference is that he hasn't been treated as such. I'd like the chance to see how you would have handled the treatment he has endured over the years."

"The difference is I still would not have become the murderer that he is."

"I hate how judgmental you are! You say you have changed but you judge him in the exact same way."

"What else do you expect me to do when he has hardly ascertained himself any differently?"

I stepped towards him, narrowing my eyes at his continued insults. "Well perhaps if you give him a chance to prove himself rather than judge him, you'll begin to see him as I do."

He eyed me for a long moment and I flushed under his gaze as his eyes trailed my features, wishing that he didn't have the effect on me that he did.

"Does it really matter so much to you?" He enquired, stepping closer still.

His gaze burned my skin further and I offered a timid nod, pulling my bottom lip in between my teeth.

"Then I shall attempt to perceive him differently, for you."

"Really?"

He laughed at my bewildered reaction and I found myself smiling in response, despite trying to hold it back. He had such a carefree, boyish laugh.

"You obviously haven't yet realized how important your happiness is to me now."

A frown replaced my smile and I was about to argue with that, because despite whatever words he promised me, I still found myself disbelieving.

I gasped as he raised a hand to my face, shivering at the warmth his touch brought. I was never going to get used to the effect he had on me or how he made me feel whenever I was in his presence. It was like there wasn't enough air to breathe and my heart would constantly forget a beat when he entered the room. Whenever he touched me, I felt nauseated but in a good way. I burned, even when his skin was cool.

My breath caught again as he leaned his head downwards though I could only seem to concentrate on inhaling enough oxygen to wonder about his intentions any further. I chewed on my bottom lip as his breath fanned across my skin deliciously, his lips pressing to my forehead.

I exhaled shakily, my teeth pressing down harder against my bottom lip. If I had thought a simple touch was overwhelming, I was not prepared for the heat of his kiss. His lips were so soft, so pleasant against my skin!

I found myself lifting my face resolutely as he drew away from me. It didn't matter in that moment about any doubts that remained over his feelings for me. I suddenly realized that I wanted to appreciate his company for as long as I could.

He seemed to be taken back a moment as I stepped closer towards him, keeping my gaze locked with his as I did. He blinked, imitating my step closer as he leaned his head downwards again.

I shivered as he paused, refusing to back away. I didn't want to be a coward. I wanted him. It had always been him. No matter how concerned I might have been about the uncertainty of finally allowing things to develop between us.

It sounded silly, but the air between us seemed to alter into something more electric and my gaze remained confident as he closed the remaining distance between us.

We sighed in unison as his lips pressed against mine. His kiss was soft, delicate at first, as though hesitant to be too fierce. As I returned his kiss however, his hand slipped around my waist to press me closer. My heart hammered erratically as his kiss became firmer, gaining more confidence in our embrace. A burning fervor ignited inside of me and I moved my hand to tangle within the silken strands of his hair as our kisses became more intense. I shivered as my mouth parted slightly, catching his sweet breathe. I frowned in complaint as he pulled back, though his forehead pressed to mine instead whilst we caught our breaths.

"Now do you believe me?" He finally questioned the matter which was still hanging over us. His usually honeyed voice carried a rough edge to it. I shivered again at the glorious sound it created.

I found myself pouting as he slowly moved back a step, reluctantly meeting his eyes. Even now I was frightened that he might suddenly change his mind at any moment. Goosebumps rose across my skin at the intensity of his gaze as he waited for my reply.

I offered a small shrug, dropping my gaze as a blush rose to my cheeks and a slight smile tugged at my lips to realize that perhaps I did need to start trusting in his feelings more.

"Perhaps you shall have to convince me further."

He chuckled at that and my smile widened, despite how much I tried not to let it show.

"I fear that may not be the wisest idea tonight, though I hope you would be agreeable in allowing me another chance."

I peered at him through my eyelashes. "Is that meant to be an invitation?"

He smiled. "Well yes it is actually, but…then again, Marcel Bonneville is still courting you so perhaps I should simply leave you to consider such an invitation-"

"I of course, accept," I responded before he could even think of taking that back.

"I realize it was not the most respectable of places to have initiated such contact either, but I shall admit that I have wanted to kiss you for a while."

We flushed at the same time as he confessed that. I chewed on my bottom lip as I replied. "Really?"

He nodded instantly. "The night of the masquerade, when you were saying all of those things and I pushed you away from me, I wanted to kiss you then. I nearly did." He confessed, his cheeks flushing with red further still. I shivered at the memory of it.

"I realize I should have ended the engagement with Christine then, but I convinced myself that it was just in the heat of the moment, out of temper more than anything else. I refused to believe that I could have feelings for you. But then when you agreed to begin meeting with Marcel, I became so infuriated that I needed to be more honest with myself."

"You refused to believe you had feelings for me because you were ashamed." I guessed, knowing that I was correct with such an assumption.

Of course I was and in a way, I couldn't blame him. I had spent most of my life thinking that I wasn't good enough for anybody and even now, after he had confessed his feelings, I still wondered why he had chosen me. Not that having feelings for someone was much of a choice.

"No, I promise you that that was not why." He insisted, quickly stepping forwards and pressing his hands to either side of my arms when I attempted to step backwards a step. "I was with Christine and I refused to believe that I had stronger feelings for anyone but her. I couldn't believe how fortunate I was to be able to get a second chance at the night of her debut. But things have changed; they changed the moment I met you."

I frowned. "But you genuinely believed you despised me for all of those months."

He shrugged. "For a while at least, only because you infuriated me each time we talked. But then whenever I was away from you, I could not seem to prevent myself from thinking of you."

I could feel my skin flush at his confession, pursing my lips to stop the massive grin that wanted to break out. I was sick of fighting my feelings for him and to hear such a confession was something I had wanted for a while.

I reluctantly stepped away from him, heaving a heavy sigh. "Perhaps we should go and see if they are both alright."

He nodded, maneuvering himself carefully through the heavy waves of the water to stand beside me as we moved back into the lair. I shivered as the cold swept past me again. The truth was that I had been too caught up in our embrace to have really noticed the cold before. If anything, I had been burning under his touch and the water had provided a needed chill.