It was 1:30. My last class of the day was Calculus. I was still shaking after my terrifying run-in with Genesis. I had avoided her for most of the day. The one other time I saw her, she was wearing an eyepatch. She didn't see me because I was on the side where her bad eye was.
I had people constantly coming up to me and asking me what had inspired me to hit her. I told them, "I wasn't the one who hit her…it was the pants." Each time I gave that answer, I saw the eyes my fans light up. It was pretty accomplishing.
I had entered my class. I sat in my seat, trying to overhear the different conversations of my classmates. It was a mixture of, "Did you see what Jackie posted on Instagram last night?" "Holy shit, I accidentally walked in on Cash and Miguel making out. So homo." "What was the homework?" "Oh, he didn't give us homework, because we have a test today."
That last comment had filled me with even more fear than hearing Genesis call my name. I turned around. "I'm sorry, but did you say we have a…test?" I asked. One of the girls nodded her head. "Oh, shit. I'm screwed," I whispered to myself. Seconds later, an old, chubby man, who I did not recognize, walked into the room. Everyone stared at him. It was quite entertaining to stare at him. He was a very heavyset man on the top of his body, yet he appeared to have sticks for legs. I could imagine the lower portion of his body giving out to the larger portion of his body. He legs snapped in half, and I can just imagine him saying, "Ugh…I knew this would happen someday."
I was snapped out of my trance when he began to talk. "Hello, everybody. I am Mr. Baxtor. I will be taking over todays class, as your teacher is out of state for the week. I will be your substitute for the next few days. While I am here, I expect nothing but respect. You will listen to me, for I am the superior figure who has been put in charge of you. You will cooperate with me, and you will not talk over me. Do you understand?" Everyone nodded. He then pulled papers out of his briefcase. "According to the schedule that your teacher gave to me, you were all assigned to take a test today?" Everyone looked at him with blank stares. They were avoiding the question. "Okay, I'm going to ask the question once more. If I don't get an answer, then you will not only take the test, but you will stay after school today for detention. Understand?" I heard one kid behind me start to make uneasy noises. "Nyeaaaa….." He sounded like very irritated. He sounded like he wanted to run out of this class. He sounded…like Waluigi. I gasped. "Here we go…Now students, were you assigned a test today? On numerical integration?" There was a silent pause. Suddenly, I screamed out, "No! We don't have a test today…you must be looking at the schedule wrong…ugh, Pre-Calculus was given a test today!" After that, there was a silent pause. Mr. Baxtor looked at me as though he knew I was hiding something. He looked at me as if he wanted to cut me for my sins. He also looked a little hurt…as if he knew I was lying, and that my lie had hurt his feelings.
He took the papers and slapped them onto the table. "Those little bastards! I asked them if they had a test today, and they told me that you were the ones who had a test! I should have known! That class is full of ungrateful freshmen who never shut up! Oh, well they're gonna get it tomorrow! They're gonna hear about it from me!" He began angrily organizing the papers on his desk. He started slamming drawers and slamming books and slamming any inanimate object he could find. As he was doing all of this slamming, I realized that while my class was safe from the horrors of Calculus, the freshmen were not. Were they annoying? Yes. Do I think that most of them look like they're in the sixth grade? Hell yeah. But, nonetheless, they were still freshmen. And it was my duty as an upperclassmen to protect them from the evils of high school. But how was I supposed to convince this monster to go easy on them now? It was too late.
Suddenly, I heard my phone begin to vibrate. I stealthily went into my tote bag to try and pull it out. Instead, I pulled out my pants. I gasped. I looked at the pants in all of their glory; they were so bold, so daring. Why cant I be more like my pants? I asked myself. It was then that I realized that I could be like my pants. I raised my hand.
"Sir, I can tell you with certainty that Pre-Calculus wasn't supposed to have a test today, either. They were assigned a practice test, instead!" He looked at me with annoyance. "Oh, please. How would you know so much about the freshmen schedule?" I looked at him, nervously thinking of an answer. "Well…usually when the freshmen have a huge test, they complain and worry about it for hours on end. I haven't heard a single freshmen do that this week." He looked at me. He then looked at his papers. He brought them really close to his face. He began to squint his eyes. "Eh…maybe he gave me the wrong schedule. Just…get to work, you maggots!" After, he pulled out his computer, and began typing angrily. He's probably writing fan fiction about killing off all of the freshmen in the world, I thought to myself.
The bell rang, and everyone sprinted out of that class. A few had actually thanked me for my lie. As I was walking through the halls, someone walked up to me and said, "Damn, Isabelle. You're really slaying today. You've never been this cool before! Please, tell me, what is going on with you! You're acting so reckless….I love it!" We both laughed. "But seriously; you've never been this cool before. What's your secret?" she asked. I looked at her, and said, "Haven't you heard? I have the pants that could spark a revolution." I pulled them out for her to admire. I put them back in my bag, and walked away.