A/N: Tony and Steve have their long awaited heart to heart.
Unbeta'd, and Marvel owns more of this than I do.
Also, if you go to my Tubmlr page (megaranoelle. tumblr. com) you can catch some behinds the scene stuff about the fic. No spoilers, promise. Maybe you can influence the story.
Breakfast had been thoroughly demolished once everyone had come to eat. Steve could see why Bruce had decided to make more than just pancakes. He also resolved to wake up a little earlier tomorrow to make breakfast so Bruce didn't have to keep cooking. Maybe he could make dinner tonight, and ask Peter to help. He wanted to keep things as normal as possible for the boy, like Tony was trying to do.
Steve noticed that when Natasha and Clint came down to eat, that Clint purposely distanced himself from Peter, sitting the furthest away. One would think that he was letting familiar faces surround the boy, but Natasha and Steve knew that it was because he felt guilty, thinking that he was part of the reason that Mary was in a coma. Natasha had assured Steve that she would handle that.
He thought that perhaps he would offer to take Peter back to his apartment to pack some stuff, Steve still needed to get some of his stuff from his own place. Steve wasn't sure if Tony would want to go with them, but he'd see what happened when he offered it.
Steve saw Tony hurry towards the front door, Peter quickly following behind him, an excited look on his face, and Steve knew that he had to follow as well. Tony kept looking back over his shoulder, smiling at Peter, walking just a touch faster before Peter could catch up to him, and Peter giggled a little. Tony reached the front door, opened it just enough to push his head out the door, blocking the rest of it as Peter tried to peek past him. Steve tilted his head, moving to try and look over Tony's head, but not getting too close.
"Dadddddddy," Peter whined when he couldn't get past Tony. Tony was talking quietly with someone outside, and Steve was curious. Tony peered over his shoulder, smirking at Peter, then moved as he opened the door.
"Peter!" Someone shot through the door, tackling Peter in a hug. Steve smiled as he saw Wade and Peter rolling around on the ground, laughing and hugging. Glancing up he saw Tony talking with Wade's mom, a backpack in her hands and a smile on her face. Steve headed over towards them to catch part of their conversation.
"-really can't thank you enough," Wade's mom was saying to Tony. The geniuses' hands were in his pockets, a smile on his face as he glanced back over at the boys. "Mr Rogers," she smiled at Steve as he walked over. Steve had met her a couple of times when she had brought Wade over to the apartment building. "Mr Stark said you'd be here, too. Can't help but think that this will be one of the safest places my Wade can be."
"Can't promise the boys will be safe from their adventures," Steve said with a chuckle.
"Are you sure that this is okay, Mr Stark?" She looked back at Tony, and Steve could see some shock in her eyes. She must have just found out that Tony Stark was the same as Peter's father Tony.
"Call me Tony, and yes, it's perfect even." Tony smiled at the woman. "I'm the one who found you, remember? This will be good for the boys, too." Tony looked at Steve now. "I invited them both over, but Mrs Wilson hasn't been able to get a hold of her brother-in-law. I told her that I'd send her with some volunteers and we could watch Wade."
"Of course," Steve nodded. "It'd be our pleasure in fact. I'm sure the boys have been missing each other, they haven't talked for, what? Three, four days?" Steve said, looking at Tony who was smirking.
"That's practically a year in Peter and Wade time," Tony added, snorting with a chuckle.
Mrs Wilson chuckled and smiled. "Thank you again. I'll try not to be gone too long."
"You've got the satellite phone, so you can call whenever, talk to Wade, keeps us updated," Tony said. The woman went to hand Tony the backpack, but Tony didn't take his hands from his pockets. Steve noted this, and the short look of discomfort, and Steve instantly reached over to take the bag. Mrs Wilson smiled at them, then went over to hug Wade, saying goodbye to him.
Steve had noticed before that Tony didn't take anything from anyone when it was handed over. Bruce would always put his stuff on a flat surface for him, even if he was going to just pick it up right away, and Natasha did the same last night when giving him something to drink for dinner. But Tony had taken the bracelets from Steve this morning, hadn't he?
"I'm gonna show Wade around the house!" Peter said, grinning at Tony. He ran over and hugged him, reaching up as far as he could. Tony smiled, rubbing his head.
"Be careful the locked doors, and listen to Jarvis." Both boys nodded before Peter grabbed Wade's hand and they were running down the hallway. "We can put Wade's stuff in Peter's room," Tony said, catching Steve's attention. "I'm sure they'll be staying the same room, because those two are attached at the hip, and the elbows, and the shoulders. Sometimes I think they might be the same person sometimes."
Steve followed Tony to the bedroom, putting Wade's bag on the bed. Tony grabbed his tablet from the bedside table, and turned to leave, but Steve didn't move right away, blocking the door. Tony raised an eyebrow at him. "You don't like things being handed to you, right?" Steve asked and Tony looked a little confused.
"Yeah," Tony said slowly. "Why? Did you plan on handing me stuff?"
"Well, I think I already did this morning," Steve commented. Tony blinked, his eyes blank suddenly. "When I gave you the bracelets."
"Nah," Tony shook his head. "You didn't hand them to me, you held them up, and then I reached over to take it. Completely different stuff." Steve wrinkled his brow a little. "Big difference, trust me.
"Not really that big of a difference," Steve told him. "It's not a problem, I'm just curious."
"Curious about what?" Tony asked, foot shuffling on the carpet. "Many things to be curious about, especially for you, Cap. All that time in the ice really set you back with society."
"Why don't you like to be handed stuff?" Steve asked, not really paying attention to Tony's train of thought. His mind, and words, traveled faster than Steve could even think to keep up. "Must make it hard to run a company."
"I don't run the company anymore," Tony corrected. "That's all Pepper now, being CEO." Steve just crossed his arms over his chest, looking at Tony. He wasn't going to be pushed off topic this time. The two men stared at each other for a few moments before Tony's shoulders slumped a little, giving in. "It's a long story, but I don't like the action of people handing things to me, of hands and arms coming towards me. It drove Pepper nuts for years, until finally just the repetition of her trying and doing it broke through. Pepper and Peter are the only ones who can hand stuff to me."
"Because you trust them," Steve added for him.
Tony nodded. "Because I can trust them." Steve caught the small wiggle in Tony's spine, the slight show of discomfort. "Peter is still a child, and kids are full of innocence, for the most part. And Pepper has just been with me for so long."
"She kind of scares me," Steve admitted and Tony smiled softly.
"That means you're a smart man, Rogers." Tony twirled the tablet in his hands a little. "Listen, since you've trapped me here and asked me to spill why things make me uncomfortable, you gotta do me a favor now." Steve raised an amused eyebrow. "Peter is no doubt going to want to go swimming with Wade at some point. It may not be today, may not be tomorrow, but it's going to happen." Steve nodded. The boys had wanted to go to the beach or the pool a lot last summer. "So, you get to take them swimming."
"Where am I supposed to take them?" Steve asked. He wasn't sure that many pools would be open for at least a couple more days.
"You haven't found the pool yet?" Tony asked, then shook his head a little. He pat Steve's arm, pushing a little to get him out of the door frame. Steve moved and followed Tony when he walked down the hallway, past the foyer, and then towards the back of the mansion. The passed the door that would lead out to the garden and Tony took a right. Steve caught the distinct smell of chlorine and wondered how he had missed this before. There was a glass door and Steve saw tiled floor and lounge chairs. Tony tapped a panel on the wall next to the door, and the door clicked open. He pushed the door open and Steve stepped inside, blinking. The pool had to be almost olympic sized, complete with a shallow end, and a deep end that went down fifteen feet. Two jacuzzi's sat against the wall furthest from the door, and there were other chairs, loungers, and tables sitting along the walls. The room was cool, not too warm or muggy, and when Steve walked over, crouching down to put a hand in the water, he felt the water was the perfect temperature.
Tony watched Steve walk over to the pool, his body staying by the door. The pool room really was a comfortable room, he had loved it as a child, and had had it updated a year before his parents death. When he knew that he was moving back here, he had it updated again, putting Jarvis in control of most of the room and its functions. He hadn't actually gone swimming since Afghanistan.
"This is better than the pool room at SHIELD," Steve said as he stood back up, looking back over at Tony.
"I'd hope so," Tony scoffed a little. "This isn't some shoddily run spy organization." Steve huffed out a little laugh. "Yeah, this room is open all the time, so feel free to come here when you feel like working out. I can assume you've already found the gym?" Steve's cheeks suddenly turned a little red, and Tony's raised an eyebrow. "You broke the punching bags, didn't you?" His cheeks turned a deeper shade of red and Tony couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, don't get your panties in a twist, I was kind of expecting that. Jarvis is already making some different material that should stand up a little longer to your super strength."
"Panties?" Steve raised an eyebrow at him. "You think I wear briefs?"
Tony raised both his eyebrows. "Okay, yes, I'm totally down for this game." Tony grinned then motioned with his free hand for Steve to turn in a circle. "Come on, Mr America, turn for me. I need to get a good look before I make my final judgement. And don't spin too fast, I need a good look."
"I can't tell if you actually need to look, if you're just coming up with an excuse to check me out." Steve gave Tony a cheeky smirk and Tony's mouth almost dropped open a little.
"You really are Captain Sassypants, aren't you? Forget Captain America, I'm calling you Captain Sassypants from now on," Tony teased. "Cap Sass, mmm, I like it," he nodded. Steve snorted and started to turn for Tony anyway. Tony tilted his head a little as he watched Steve's backside a little more than usual. "Cap's Ass is more like it," he murmured under his breath, but the smirk on Steve's face told him that he must have heard him. "I've made my decision, but do you wanna do one more turn for me?"
Steve laughed. "I don't think so, mister. I think you owe me a turn now." Steve twirled his finger, looking at Tony. He wanted to play this game? Oh, Tony could play with the best of them. He had been born and bred to strut his stuff. Tony put his free hand in his pocket, fisting his hand so the fabric drew a little tighter around his body. His steps were deliberate as he turned, making his posture as straight as could be, pushing his hips back a little.
It was hard not to notice Tony as he turned, and Steve's eyes were drawn to his body as he turned, something curling in his gut when he watched Tony's ass, the fabric of his pants drawn tight against the skin. A faint heat crept up his neck and he felt like he should take a dunk in the pool. Except that the water wouldn't be nearly cold enough.
Tony smirked as he faced Steve, catching the faint blush on his cheek. There was no way that America's greatest heroic symbol was actually checking out Tony. Either that, or Steve was exploring the changes of his sexuality, and Tony would feel a little proud if he was the one to make that happen.
"I think that you actually wear boxer briefs," Tony said after a few seconds, not wanting the moment to turn awkward. "That is my final decision. You don't strike me as a boxers guy, at least not in the new century."
Steve's eyes shot back up to Tony's when he started talking. He wasn't wrong. Mary had taken him out the first couple days after he woke up to get some clothes. He had been a little embarrassed that a woman, that wasn't his mother, had taken him out to buy his 'unmentionables', but he had been assured that it was just his '40's mentality talking. It helped a little that Mary had brought Peter with them, the little boy pointing to a store in the mall that "Daddy goes to all the time." Steve smirked a little, he had his answer thanks to a mini Stark.
"I feel like you have an unfair advantage," Steve said. "You've been living in this century, help shaped this century, since it started. I've only had a few years with it."
"So I'm right!" Tony declared and grinned.
"And now it's my turn," Steve said, and saw Tony give him a look. Tony thought that he was never going to be able to guess. This was going to be a good moment. "Depends on the occasion for you." Tony raised an eyebrow. "Right now? You're wearing boxer briefs as well, but that's because there are people here. When you're going to a Charity Gala you wear custom boxers, usually a soft material, but when there's some kind of party, or you're home alone and don't plan on working in the workshop, you wear nothing."
Tony's jaw dropped a little, but he quickly recovered. "That was very specific, even down to a specific kind of fabric." Tony narrowed his eyes a little at Steve, watching the man smirk a little. Then it clicked. "You little cheater! Now who has the unfair advantage? You've gotten all your answers from Mary and Peter!" Steve couldn't help it and started laughing, bending over as he laughed harder with each second. Tony bit his lip, but couldn't help it for long and joined in the laughter.
"I just used what was available to me!" Steve said through his laughs, grinning. "If it helps, I didn't remember this until after you made your guess."
"Cheating McCheaterpants," Tony point at him. "Captain McCheater."
"I thought I was Captain Sassypants?" Steve asked, arms crossed, still smiling.
"I can't deal with you!" Tony threw his hands up, turning to leave the room. Steve caught up with him quickly, walking next to him back down the hallway. "The Twenty-First Century has corrupted you Steven Rogers."
"Does that upset you?" Steve asked, raising an eyebrow.
"I'm upset that I didn't have a direct hand in it!" Tony turned them to head back towards the front of the mansion. He wanted to get down to his workshop now, to see if Jarvis had finished production on those punching bags. "You are so not like what my Dad described-" Tony stopped abruptly. That was a train of thought that he did not need to go down, especially with the man walking next to him.
"That must have been interesting, to hear what Howard had to say," Steve commented. He had probably meant for it to be an innocent sentence. Tony had been avoiding this very topic since he found out that this was Captain America, and he himself had inadvertently brought them directly there. Tony made a decision.
"Follow me." Tony suddenly change direction, heading down the opposite hallway from the bedrooms. Steve tilted his head in confusion, but followed Tony. He had gone down this hallway, but most of the doors were closed, and he hadn't wanted to try to see if any of them were locked or not, feeling like he might be intruding on something personal.
Tony took them to the end of the hallway, to the wooden double doors. Tony reached up, and slid part of the wood panel above the door open, a key dropping into his hand. He unlocked the door, one hand on the handle, then slid the key back into the little compartment, hiding it once again. Steve caught a faint smell of dust as they stepped into the room, Tony shutting the door behind them. There was a large oak desk in the center of the room, a plush, old, leather chair tucked in behind it. There were books coverings the shelves behind the desk that ran the length of the wall, a large window with the curtains drawn to the left of the desk, and a leather couch to the right.
Steve glanced at Tony, but the man was leaning against the door frame. He made a motion with his hand, sweeping it out, encouraging him to explore the room. This was obviously an office, someone office, but it hadn't been used in years. As he walked around the other side of the desk he saw that there were some folders stacked in the center, and just a few picture frames were sitting on the desk.
This was Howard's office.
There was a picture of him and his wife, the same one that had been in his SHIELD file, sitting in a silver frame. On the other side was a picture of the founding members of SHIELD, and Steve smiled faintly. There was the young Howard Stark that Steve knew, standing next to Peggy Carter. Next to that picture was one of himself. It was after the Howling Commandos had gotten back from a mission, and Steve had been laughing at something that Bucky had said, just out of frame. Steve looked around the desk, looking back to the picture of Howard and Maria, looking for a family picture with Tony in it. But there wasn't one.
Tony saw when Steve noticed what was missing on Howard's desk, when his eyes swept over the desk a second, then a third time. Steve looked back up and caught Tony's eyes. "He did most of his work from here, he didn't like the feeling of an office in a large corporate building. He did a lot of meetings here as well, wanting to make clients feel comfortable, but to be on his territory, said that's how sharks got their prey." Tony moved from his spot and opened one of the old files sitting on the desk, spreading out some of the papers.
There was a map on a grid, most of it crossed out, coordinates written on top. One spot had been circled and colored blue. Steve glanced at the other papers, looking official and typed, and one looking like a letter. "This was the work he did trying to find you," Tony said quietly. "He had been putting together the presentation to get another ship out there to search, saying that he had new tech that could search deeper in the ocean, through the ice. I assume that's probably what SHIELD used to find you... After nearly fifty years though, the Board would need some convincing to fund the expedition again. He kept searching for you up until the day he died."
Steve looked at Tony. He was hiding a lot in his voice as he spoke. This wasn't an easy subject for the genius. "Since I can remember, Da-Howard always talked about you. When I was little, the stories I heard were the most amazing things I had ever heard. I wanted to go on adventures with the Captain, Bucky, and the Howling Commandos. Aunt Peggy-" Tony stopped and Steve looked at him with surprised eyes. Tony swallowed before continuing. "She told me a lot of stories when she would come over."
Tony walked over to a small wood hutch, pulled open a wooden door and pulled out a crystal decanter with an amber liquid inside. Tony pulled the top off and took a sniff. He closed his eyes and set it back down, leaving the top off, but didn't reach for a glass. "The stories never stopped, but they changed as I got older. I went to a lot of different boarding schools, and the teachers didn't like that I was smarter than them." Tony was looking out the window now, having pulled the curtains back a little. "I don't mean to sound like a dick, but it was true. I was always above what grade I was in, and I got bored, and I corrected the teachers. I mouthed off when they called me a cheater on tests, and I eventually would get kicked out. Howard never listened to my side of the story, just threw money at the next boarding school and shipped me off. And tell me how I would never live up to the great Captain."
Steve frowned a little. Howard wouldn't have done that, would he? Not the Howard that Steve knew at least. But if Steve really thought about it, how well did he know Howard Stark? "He started to drink, a lot," Tony continued. "I never really had a close relationship with him, or one in general." Tony put the top back on the decanter, slowly putting it back, but didn't close the door on it. "Do you know how I met Bruce? It was by accident really. Bruce is older than me. I met him after I took over Stark Industries. He had waited to schedule a meeting with me, not wanting to meet with Obadiah, and now I really can't blame him." Steve could tell there was another story there. "He told me that Howard had been funding his research, the same research that turned him into the Hulk."
Tony turned to look at Steve, the supersoldier's eyes widened in surprise. "That's not even the best part. I'm sure Jarvis told you about this?" Tony tapped his chest, the arc reactor, and Steve nodded a little.
"He told me the basics, but the older model was poisoning you?" Steve said and Tony nodded.
"While Bruce and I were working on the new model, we went through some of Howard's old stuff from SHIELD, and we found some old films. He left a message for me on one of them, and it didn't click right away, the words that he used, and Bruce didn't comment on it but I think he knew." Tony leaned against the hutch, his back to the alcohol now. "'What is, and always will be, my greatest creation, is you.' When the nicest thing you can ever remember from your father saying to you is 'Good job on not pissing off the Board', you take a line like that as hit or miss." Tony rubbed his face with his hand. "He never told me that he loved me, and then he calls me his 'greatest creation', what is that supposed to mean?"
Steve was quiet as he listened, afraid that if he said anything it would spook Tony, that he would realize where he was and stop talking. "Howard had put all of his eggs in Bruce's basket, with the research, to recreate the serum. He had told Bruce that he would give him the 'Vita Rays' needed to complete the process if Bruce could remake Erskine's formula." Tony let out a strained laugh. "His message wasn't meant to reach me when he died, it was meant to reach me after Howard used the damn serum on me." Tony saw Steve's jaw drop, "I'm a little conflicted on if it was Hero worship, or if he really did love me, enough to turn me into the next you."
"Fuck," Steve breathed out, falling back a little to lean against the front of the desk. He glanced at the map on the desk, and saw that it spanned hundreds of miles. "He became obsessed," he said quietly, putting the rest of the pieces together. "He had worked closely with Erskine, so of course he couldn't just let everything, disappear."
Tony saw the emotions flitting through Steve's eyes when he looked at him, and Tony felt vaguely uncomfortable. There was sympathy, pity, and understanding? Tony took a couple breaths. Had he really showed Howard's office to Steve, he had talked about his life with him. What was he thinking? He had let Steve practically hand him something. Mary couldn't even hand him stuff. He needed to get out of here. Tony turned, shutting the door, hiding the alcohol once again, the temptation gone, and he headed for the door.
Steve quickly followed Tony, the smaller man moving quickly. "Tony." He didn't stop at his name, kept moving. "Tony," Steve said, this time reaching out and taking a gentle hold of Tony's upper arm. He turned around quickly, looking at Steve with wide eyes, his other hand reaching up, but then resting on Steve's wrist. "If you need to talk-"
"Yeah, I got it," Tony nodded, gently pulling away from Steve. "I've got stuff in the workshop." He turned and practically jogged away, heading for the door downstairs, leaving Steve in the hallway.
"Jarvis?" Steve called out quietly.
"Yes, Captain?" The AI responded just as softly.
"Reroute all work calls to me, please? It's Tony's birthday, and he deserves a break." Jarvis responded in the positive as Steve stared down where Tony had disappeared. "Where is Dr Banner?"
"Dr Banner is making some tea in the kitchen, Captain." Steve nodded and headed for the kitchen.
Bruce was indeed in the kitchen, standing by the stove, a tea kettle hissing, but not screaming yet. There was a tea cup sitting there, with a round metal ball attached to a little chain sitting inside the empty cup. Steve cleared his throat a little, trying not to startle the Doctor. Bruce turned around and gave him a little smile. "Captain." Steve nodded his greeting and Bruce really looked at him. "Would you like some tea?"
"Ah, no, that's alright, but thank you." Steve took a seat at the same stool he had sat at for breakfast. "I was wondering if I could talk to you? About Tony?" The kettle started to whistle and Bruce turned the heat off, pouring the water into the cup, letting the tea steep. He walked over and took a seat across from Steve.
"Depends on what you want to talk about," Bruce said carefully. Steve could see that Bruce was protective of Tony, and he couldn't blame him, but now he could really see it after what Tony told him. It was no wonder why the Hulk saved Tony when he was falling back down to Earth. Steve tried to suppress the shiver of the memory.
"Tony showed me Howard's office," Steve said after a moment, thinking about how he had wanted to start the conversation. Bruce raised an eyebrow faintly. "He, uh, he told me about how Howard kept looking for me, and that he had, funded your research?"
Bruce's eyes hardened, then softened after a second. "Tony is a very bright individual." Steve nodded his agreement. "And he was still young when Howard approached me. I'm still not really sure how he had heard of my research, but that's of little importance anymore. I didn't know of what he had intended until much later."
Steve frowned a little, sitting in a bit of suspense when Bruce got up to check on his tea, adding a bit of honey to it, and coming back to his seat with the cup cradled in his hands. "I think Howard had been giving up on finding you, it had been a long time, and there was Tony, trying to show off and get his father's attention. He was sure that the Board was going to deny his request to send another team out to search for you, and so he started to come up with a back up plan."
"So, he really intended to make Tony into another Super Soldier?" Steve asked quietly. He had volunteered for it, had volunteered for the experiment. Steve had known exactly what he was getting into when he signed up, Dr Erskine had made Steve completely aware of everything that could happen and gave him every chance to back down. Tony would have been a child, and would have done it just to get his parents to notice him. If he had been given a choice.
"When Tony became CEO, I went to him," Bruce said, not answering the question. That was answer enough for Steve. "I told him about my research and what Howard had been hoping for, but I didn't tell what Howard had planned to do with it."
"How did you find out that he wanted to use it on Tony?" Steve asked the scientist, watching him sip his tea.
"About a month before he died, Howard let it slip. He was asking questions about candidates" Bruce looked at him calmly. "Said he had one in mind, when I finished the serum. He was confident that I would finish it, perfect it. Said that he was smart, had spunk, and was little, just like you had been, but he was sure that the potential was there, and that he just needed a kick in the rear." The brunette snorted a little, taking another drink from his cup. "Probably the nicest words I'd heard him say about his son," he murmured into his cup before looking back at Steve. "I had met Tony in passing a couple times before that, he was in MIT at this time, getting his graduate degrees. I didn't say anything, but when Howard left the file for his 'candidate', well, I knew it was Tony.
"You have to understand, Tony looked up to Captain America as a kid," Bruce said, catching Steve by surprise. "He has all the posters, the comics, the toys, all of that. Coulson's trading cards? Tony completed the set for him from his own personal collection."
"But, on the Hellicarrier," Steve trailed off a little.
"Easy to hold onto that child like ignorance when your Hero is supposed to be just a person printed on a piece of paper," Bruce said quietly. "Why do you think Peter has Captain America sheets? Tony introduced his son to what was his strongest ally as a kid. Everything Tony does is an attempt to not be like Howard." He leaned across the counter, really staring into Steve's eyes. "Think about every time you've heard Peter talk about his Dad, or see him interact with Tony. And think about what Tony told you earlier."
Steve did. Thought back to when he had just met Tony, in those glasses and hat, picking up Peter. When he saw him outside of Peter's school when he had to keep a low profile. How Peter would tell Steve about what he was going to do with his Dad, or what they had already done that weekend. Peter adored Tony, said that his Daddy would never let him down, that he was always there. Mary said it, too. She admitted that Tony spoiled Peter a bit, but Steve wasn't sure that the term meant the same now as it did when he was a kid. Peter was always respectful, said please and thank you, did talk over adults, very much, unless he was really excited. Mary had never really had to punish Peter, except when he would get in trouble for being gone to long with Wade on an adventure, but even afterwards she would smile fondly at Steve, tell him that she was glad he had such a loyal friend.
And Steve knew what was happening. "Tony never wants Peter to have to beg for attention," Steve nearly whispered. Bruce just took another drink from his cup, letting Steve work this one out. "He's nurtured everything that Peter has ever shown a little bit of an interest in. He gave up being a CEO to try and spend more time with Peter."
Steve suddenly felt a flush of shame sweep through his body. He had once thought that Tony was an absent father, one someone who only put in the minimum effort with Peter. He had actually thought that Peter deserved better than someone who could only 'try' to make time for their son. But, now that Steve could put all the pieces together, he saw that Tony was doing almost everything in his power to be a good Dad, without exposing Peter to the tabloid sharks. It had to be hard, and it was only going to get harder.
Bruce was humming, getting up from his seat and going over to the sink. "If you'll excuse me, I'm going to check on the two little troublemakers, then go out to the gardens." He left with a small smile on his face, empty tea cup washed out, humming softly. Steve blinked a little. He wanted to talk to Tony.
The first thing Tony did was put the workshop in lockdown, Jarvis under orders to not disturb him unless it was for Peter. What had he just done? He took Steve to Howard's office, then just, spilled his soul. They had been having fun in the pool room, and yes, he could admit that he had been checking out Steve's ass, and he could have just left it at that.
Tony groaned, falling onto the couch, pressing his face into one of the pillows. What was wrong with him? Sure, he had known Steve for over a year, technically, and he turned out to be the man that he had idolized as a kid, (and maybe an adult), but that didn't mean that he trusted him. Right?
He was just all knotted up from not sleeping, and George being a dick, that was all. He knew that Peter would be happy now that Wade was here, so he had that going for him. He was sure that he could get through dinner relatively quietly, since he had already had his birthday pancakes, and the day would end relatively peacefully. He wished that Mary was awake.
Jarvis informed him that the new punching bags would be ready shortly after dinner. And when Tony went to his own bedroom to try and get some rest, Tony would suddenly find a reason to put them up.
His body was tired, he felt sluggish as he crawled into his ignored bed. Wade was asleep in Peter's room, both sleeping peacefully, and Wade's mom calling after dinner to wish her son a good night. Tony flopped down on his stomach, mumbling nonsense into the blankets, closing his eyes.
He took a breath, rolled onto his back, then let out a sigh. Sleep wasn't going to come to him. He opened his eyes and let out a gasp. Obadiah was standing above him, a grim smile on his face, eyes sunken in, his face gaunt. His skeletal hand reached out, coming down over his arc reactor. Tony's hand shot out, grabbing his wrist to stop him and let out a shot of surprise when he looked at the hand. It was grey and strong, with one too many fingers, and when he looked back up he saw a bloody mouth behind a golden mask with a dark hood over eyes.
"No!" Tony kicked up and rolled. He opened his eyes and saw that he was on the floor now, breathing heavily, his room empty. He took a deep breath, hand going to rest over his arc reactor, feeling the buzz, and feeling his heart hammering in his chest. There was no way that he was going to get to sleep tonight.
"Jarvis, lights," Tony murmured, pushing himself up. He was in sweat pants, but pulled off his t-shirt that was drenched in sweat now. As he pulled on a new shirt, he slipped on his shoes, heading down to the workshop, snapping the bracelets the entire way down. Maybe he could get the punching bags up before Steve woke up, surprise him at his next workout.
He wasn't expecting the man to be awake and already in the gym though. Tony stared as he watched the man in his routine, just wailing on the punching bag already there. He had a rhythm going, and he kept getting faster, head hunched down, balled up fist smacking the bag audibly, muscles rippling along his arms and into his back, and Tony could definitely see that through the white t-shirt.
Both Tony and Steve jumped when Tony accidentally dropped the punching bag. "Tony?" Steve asked, panting through his workout.
"Uh, yeah, hey, sorry." Tony quickly pulled the bag back up, but not picking it up. "Um, the new punching bags are done, and I thought I would put them up, and I didn't think that you would be here."
"At three in the morning?" Steve asked, walking over. He easily lifted the punching bag up with one arm, walked back over to take down the old one that was covered in duct tape, and hooked up the new one. Tony walked over, leaning down to examine the old one. It was literally being held together by many pieces of duct tape, and even that was starting to fray. Steve had been here for less than three days, how had he worn through even the duct tape this much?
"Yeah, you know me, I keep strange hours," Tony murmured, before standing up again. He saw Steve's bright blue eyes looking at him and Tony had to bite the inside of his cheek. "I tried to sleep again and had a nightmare," Tony confessed. "What are you doing awake so early? Because this is early even for you."
Steve rubbed the back of his neck a little. "I've had a lot on my mind today, and I couldn't get to sleep."
"And beating on a stuffed bag helps?" Tony asked, pushing the old bag further off to the side.
"Sometimes." Tony looked at Steve.
"But not this time?" He asked.
Steve shook his head. "Not really."
Tony chew on his bottom lip a little with his canines. "Uh, wanna talk about it?" Steve looked at him a little surprised.
"I would, but, I'm not sure if you do," he said hesitantly. Tony made a little 'o' with his mouth. Steve was thinking about the stuff that he had shown him earlier. What hell, he was already this far down the rabbit hole of bad decisions, and he had just had a nightmare that he was eager to forget. Even Howard was better than what he saw.
"Sure, why not," Tony said. He grabbed the hook of the old punching bag and pulled it over to the wall. He went over and grabbed some tape and started to wrap his hands. "Let's talk and hit, yeah? Seriously, any topic, don't feel the need to shy away from anything." Steve raised an eyebrow at him. "I mean it, it's you and me and Jarvis in here, and whatever happens in here, stays in here, if it gets awkward and all." He stepped behind the punching bag, putting his hands on it, and nodded to Steve. "Let's go, Romeo." Romeo? What the hell, Stark?
Steve blinked a few more times, watching Tony. The man looked tired, but he could tell that he still knew what he was talking about. Steve gave a few test punches, feeling the new fabric against his taped knuckles. "I talked to Dr Banner today."
"You're allowed to call him Bruce all the time now," Tony told him, watching Steve's form. "You don't have to switch back and forth, I think you've earned the right to a first name basis."
"Okay," Steve said, letting his punches become a little harder, seeing that Tony could take it without being pushed backwards by the force. "I talked to Bruce, about his past research, with your Dad, er, Howard."
"Sometimes I still call Howard Dad, it's okay," Tony said, a little smirk on his face.
"Well, I just, it's hard to reconcile the man that I knew, and the man that was actually your dad," Steve admitted. "But I didn't know him that long. I didn't actually see him that often during the war."
"Having big important war time missions to stop Hydra would kind of put a damper in that," Tony said, nodding.
"I just, it's hard to think that someone would try and force the changes the serum gives on someone," Steve said, frowning, looking at the punching bag. "I like to think that Howard was different than the bad guys we were fighting back in the war, but he would have forced that on you. That's not what a father should be like." Tony could tell that he was getting more upset, more force pushing against him as Steve hit harder. He changed his stance, putting more force into holding the punching bag still. "And I know that Bruce didn't know what he wanted to do at first, and it makes me upset that he was trying to use him to do something like that. You were his son."
"Some people just aren't meant to be parents," Tony said, and he saw the frown deepen on Steve's face, his blue eyes becoming cloudier. This was really bothering the man. "It's why I was very careful, well, until I met Mary. Probably a good thing I don't drink as often anymore."
Steve stopped, panting again and looked at Tony. "You are an amazing father," Steve said with such heat that Tony had to blink, a little startled. "You are the best father that Peter could ever ask for, and he's a lucky little boy, and no one else can say otherwise." Tony was about to open his mouth, to calm Steve down, but the bigger man continued. "I was wrong to think what I did about you, when I first woke up, before even meeting you, and after meeting you. I thought that you were a deadbeat dad, but you weren't, you were just working with the deck stacked against you. And you went and proved everyone wrong!"
Tony's eyes were a little wide, his mouth hanging open slightly, shocked at the words that were aimed for him. Steve moved from the front of the punching bag, standing in front of Tony and putting his hands on Tony's shoulders. "You are an amazing man, and I'm sorry that I may have indirectly lead you to buy into the thoughts that you aren't."
"I'm really not that amazing," Tony said quietly. "I have a large laundry list of flaws."
"That's what makes you human," Steve said. "I'm really not perfect, despite what everyone says or think." Tony snorted a little. "I'm serious, I'm stubborn to the ends of the earth, and I never back down from a fight. I'm mouthy and I'm fiercely protective of those I care about, almost down to a dangerous level."
"I'm volatile, self-obsessed and work-obsessed, don't play well with others, text book narcissistic, alcoholic," Tony listed off almost immediately, and Steve started to shake his head.
"Maybe you used to be an alcoholic, but you can control yourself around Peter," Steve started to refute.
"I could fall off the wagon at any time," Tony argued.
"I think if that were really true, you would have done it already," Steve said, with a raised eyebrow. "I mean, if something were going to drive a man to drink, it would be what you went through, and the resulting nightmares." Tony grumbled, but didn't say anything. "And if you really couldn't play well with others, we wouldn't have worked as a team so well out there. But you're also Peter-obsessed, and that's not a bad thing."
"Were you talking to Pepper too?" Tony accused, narrowing his eyes a little. "Did she tell you to say all this?"
"No," Steve shook his head. "I wouldn't have stayed here if I really meant everything I said up on the Hellicerrier," he said quietly, taking a step closer to Tony. "You were right though, about me, taking care of Peter. Before, becoming this, I had always thought that I never would have a family, and afterwards, there was just the war to think about." Steve looked to the side, his hands slipping down on Tony's arms. "When I woke up, Mary gave me a choice, and time to think. I could do just about anything that I wanted, and there was that option. And then I met Peter, and he was just, he was so amazing, and I swore to protect him with everything in me."
"Cap," Tony breathed. He hadn't meant to say any of that stuff to him, he hadn't meant it. "I didn't-"
"I was a little jealous," Steve admitted and Tony frowned. "Peter talks about you all the time, and I thought that I would never have that, never had a kid of my own talking about me like that to someone."
"It's the opposite when he's with me," Tony said quickly, and Steve looked up at him. "He's always talking about you, when he's with me, that is. You teach him how to draw, and you're teaching him about how colors work. I can't do that, I'm more suited to the science stuff, the logical numbers, I can't do the art, and spatial awareness thinking." Tony moved one of his hands to rest on Steve's upper arm. "I'm sure Mary told you, but yeah, I was jealous of you, too. You didn't have to hide when you went to pick up Peter from school, or take him out to the park. For fuck sake, you were the one I told to take care of my son when I flew up into the wormhole! I trust you with his life, to raise him,..." Tony trailed off and swallowed thickly.
"I don't like to be handed things because when I would try to show my Dad stuff he would slap it from my hands," Tony confessed, speaking quickly, and if Steve hadn't of been looking at Tony he might have missed it. "When hands come towards me I think that I've done something wrong, and that I'm going to be punished for it, because for as much as I'm adult I can't help but to revert to a child being demeaned by their father."
Steve reached up slowly, gently, cupping Tony's cheek. Tony closed his eyes tightly, trying not to lean into the warm hand. Jarvis, the human, had been the last one to cup his cheek like that, when he had been dying. As much as he tried to stop it, a tear slid down his cheek and Steve's thumb wiped the tear away. Steve's other hand rested against the side of his neck, curving around to the back.
"Tony," Steve said quietly, drawing Tony's eyes open. He was staring straight into clear blue eyes, stunning azure eyes that begged to take Tony's breath away. Steve leaned his head in, enough that Tony knew what he wanted to do, and he didn't hesitate to meet him the rest of the way, his hand sliding up to the back of Steve's neck. Steve's lips were warm, and soft against his, the kiss was gentle, but the need was there.
Steve pulled back a couple centimeters, still feeling Tony's hand on the back of his neck. "I don't mean to push-" Tony pulled him back down, kissing him again, drawing a soft moan from Steve when he started to pull on Steve's bottom lip with his teeth.
Tony leaned his forehead against Steve's, eyes closed, both of them panting a little. "Sir, Young Master Peter seems to be having a nightmare." Tony's eyes flew open at Jarvis's voice.
"Sorry, I just, Peter," Tony breathed before letting go of Steve and running for the exit. He was aware that Steve was following behind him, and a little bit of warmth lit up in his chest. Tony opened the door and saw that Wade was sitting up in the bed, arms wrapped around Peter, who was lightly crying into the older boys shirt. Big brown eyes looked up at Tony as he and Steve slid into Peter's room and Tony was already moving to sit on the edge of the bed.
"Hey, Peter," Tony said softly, and Wade moved Peter a little so that he could see Tony.
"Daddy," Peter's lip wibbled and threw himself against Tony. Tony wrapped his arms around his tightly, kissing the top of his head, rubbing his back, sussing softly.
"I'm here, Petey, I'm right here." He rested his head gently on top of Peter's head. He was vaguely aware of Steve moving to the other side of the bed and sitting down. When he moved his eyes to look, Wade was sitting against Steve's side, watching his best friend. Steve's head leaned down to talk to Wade quietly, rubbing his arm. Wade nodded at something that Steve said.
"Did you have a nightmare?" Tony asked his son and felt his little head nod. "Do you wanna tell me about it?" There was no answer, Peter sniffing, hands gripping Tony's shirt. "You know, I had a nightmare tonight, too," Tony told him. Peter moved his head, peering up at him. "They get scary, don't they?" Peter nodded. "But they're just dreams, and they're not real, and if we can just open our eyes, then it all goes away." Tony wished it could be that easy. "Did Wade help you wake up?" Another nod.
"I heard him moving on the bed," Wade said and Tony looked over towards him. "And then I thought I heard him talking, and I knew that he was having a dream."
"He talked to me until you came," Peter said softly.
"Good thing you have such a good friend, huh?" Tony smiled softly at Peter, running his hand through his hair. "How about the four of us go to the kitchen, have a late night snack of some hot chocolate? Then we can all watch a movie."
"Wade and I can stay up with you and Mr Steve?" Peter asked, and Tony glanced over to see a small smile on Steve's face.
"Yeah, you guys can stay up with us," Tony said, dropping another kiss on the top of Peter's head.