Here's the second half of the 3rd chapter! If you haven't read the first half yet, go read that first. If you didn't read the first half, you're probably gonna be shouting "WHAT? HUH? HOW'D THIS HAPPEN?" within the first few paragraphs of this post. So go read that portion or else I take no responsibility for your reaction.
Just like in chapter 2, Phil and the OC will have songs representing them incorporated in this portion. I dedicate this part for all the Five Seconds of Summer, Alex and Sierra, and The Cab fans out there! I hope you enjoy the conclusion and see me in the end for a lengthy final author's note.
PS I don't really know how the format of BBC radio goes (the time difference between Hawaii and England sucks so I can't watch the show live). I'm basing off whatever happens from what I read in TABINOF.
Being without Phil is like living without air.
The days following Phil's departure is spent living in his existential crisis black hole. Despite the silence broken between him and her, his heart is still shred into pieces. He couldn't find any motivation to film a video for his channel. He delayed posting the new Sims 4 video for the gaming channel. What would be the point? Any video he posts will remind him that he is clicking on the "Post now" button without Phil next to him. He would be doing it sans Phan kisses.
Even Twitter and Tumblr is no help to him. On Twitter, he sees the fans questioning why he hadn't tweeted for days. On Tumblr, the chances of stumbling upon phan art are likely. At this rate, social media would find out that there is trouble in phan paradise. Dan can't let that happen. He doesn't want his anti-fans to use the troubles in his love life against him.
He is on his browsing position on the sofa. His fingers are on the keyboard of his MacBook. His mind struggles to figure out what to tweet. He has to reassure his fans that he is alright.
Hey guys I'm not dead or lost in space or anything just had to deal with rl life issues. No need to worry
He sends the tweet. In a few minutes, the tweet garners over 2,000 likes, over 1,000 retweets, and a bunch of tweets to him.
r u ok?
U sick man?
Does that mean Sims will be back?
These tweets are the ones he chooses to answer back.
Yh I'm fine now thanks for asking
No though the sniffles would be better
SOON.
He scrolls farther down the tweets. He finds hers and it makes him do a half-smile.
Don't you mean lost in neverland? Btw I caught that Pokemon reference ;)
Lost in Neverland. He loves that she is a fan of All Time Low, thanks to her best friend. And Dawn's infamous "no need to worry" quote. He has heard her say it too many times that it becomes a habit to say it himself.
He answers back to her tweet. Neverland kicked me out and Dawn got to me
Seconds after he responds to her tweet, his phone vibrates. She is calling him.
"Glad to see you're back from the dead," she says when he picks up.
"You know I'd be a terrible zombie."
"Zombies are already terrible, so at least you can be terrible along with everyone else that got infected."
He lets out a soft chuckle. The only times he can smile or laugh is because of her. "What would you do if I did become a zombie?"
"Kill you. Instant death. No way I'd let you munch on anyone else's brains."
"Even yours?"
"Duh. So you want me to come over?"
"Sure."
"I'm on my way."
She hangs up. Looking back to his laptop screen, he sees that her tweet has gotten over 500 likes.
The star to his moon. At least the moon has some sort of light to seek.
~:~
Phil lays in the bed of his parents' home, staring up at the ceiling. The room is dark and the only light is coming from the moonlight outside. The only sounds are his steady breathing and Five Seconds of Summer's Beside You playing on his phone. For the last several days, he avoided listening to Muse songs, for every Muse song reminds him of his beloved. It's the same with My Chemical Romance and Panic at the Disco. He can tolerate All Time Low.
Five Seconds of Summer has become his go-to band to listen to songs to at the moment. He sees why many of his female fans love 5SOS. The four Australians have some songs he can relate to. Especially Beside You. It's the song that reminds him how much he misses Dan.
I wish I can lay beside you.
So close, yet so far away. They exist under the same sky: Dan for the night, Phil for the day.
He wants to go back home. Home is where Dan is. It's not the same sleeping on a bed without Dan lying inches away.
He can go back any time. He is the one that calls the shots. But not yet. It's too soon. Phil wants to make sure that by the time he returns, Dan knows who his heart belongs to.
He closes his eyes, drifting into unconsciousness, another lonely night to sleep though.
~:~
Five weeks pass. Dan hasn't discovered any signs to tell him when Phil is coming home. He hoped some fan would have spotted Phil and leaked it onto Twitter. But nothing. No one has seen him around. Maybe the ones that have are those that aren't Dan and Phil fans. Or maybe Phil is that good at hiding. The latter is unlikely. Phil is a terrible secret keeper and comes up with the worst disguises.
Hosting his radio show by himself is mind-boggling. BBC Radio is under the impression that, according to Phil, is in America taking care of a family friend with cancer. Phil's leave, however, doesn't make Dan want to disappoint the fans. Every week, he has to come up with material to do for the show from one person instead of two. He has tried to convince her to co-host with him temporarily until Phil comes back, but she declined. She hasn't completely gotten over her shyness for public speaking.
She does come to watch him do the show. She sits with the crew, giving him words of encouragement during song breaks. She helps him come up with ideas on what to do on the radio. She helps him pick songs to add for his radio playlists. In fact, next week, he is allowing her to take complete control for the week's radio playlist. He trust her. Their music tastes are almost exactly the same. So far, all she hinted for a song that is on the playlist is one of her favorite All Time Low songs.
It has started to become a new routine. At this rate, she could change her mind and try to co-host with him on the show for one day. She is a reason why he can keep the show going. Another is that Phil would probably kick his arse if he didn't.
On the air, he looks at the next song that is on the playlist. It's one he doesn't recognize. It's one of her choices.
Little Do You Know: Alex and Sierra.
He plays the song. Glancing at her, he motions for her to come over.
She nods. She stands from her chair and makes her way over to him. "What's up?"
"Who's Alex and Sierra?"
"They were the winner from the American version of X Factor back in… 2013? They're a couple in real life."
"Oh." His ears pick up on the song's tune. It's slow. Sad.
Little do you know how I'm breaking when you fall asleep
Little do you know I'm still haunted by the memories
Little do you know I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece
Little do you know I need a little more time
It's a woman singing. Sierra. The lyrics sound like him.
Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside
I've been holding back for the fear you might change your mind
I'm ready to forgive you but forgetting is a harder fight
Little do you know I need a little more time
Definitely him. The lyrics reflect his feelings for her.
I'll wait, I'll wait
I'll love you like I've never felt the pain
I'll wait, I promise you don't have to be afraid
I'll wait, the love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me
Now it's a man. Alex. Those lyrics sound like an answer.
Little do you know I know you're hurting while I'm sound asleep
Little do you know all my mistakes slowly drowning me
Little do you know I'm trying to make it better piece by piece
Little do you know I, I love you till the sun dies
Her. Alex's lyrics are how she feels toward him. She knows he is hurting. She knows his mistakes. She is trying her hardest to pick up the pieces Phil left him in. And he knows she loves him, too much he is sometimes confused over how she could still wait this long.
He looks down at her. He knows. Almost a month has passed. No matter how long it takes, she is along for the ride. No matter how long the ride takes, she is on it until it reaches the end.
"How did you find the song?" he asks.
"I stumbled upon it on YouTube," she replies. "I liked how it sounded. Then… well… things happen and now the song has more meaning."
"It sure does."
The song draws to a close. "I gotta get back."
"Yeah." She sighs. "You think people will like that I put a slow song on the radio? I know there are some that aren't into that."
"They will. They have no sense of music taste if they don't."
"It's not all about the high tempo."
"Agreed."
He heads back to his place and puts his headphones back on.
That song has left him more to think about.
~:~
Back in London. Can we meet up?
It's happening. The text has confirmed the worries she tried for weeks to nurse Dan through. Phil is coming back. Judging from the few words in Phil's text, Dan probably has no idea that Phil is back in the area.
Eight weeks. That is how long this has gone on. Eight weeks of when's and what-if's. Weeks of avoiding fans' inquiry of why Phil hasn't posted a new video on AmazingPhil for a while. Dan got around to posting the Sims video, but other than that, nothing new was posted on their separate channels. Dan put off on doing YouTube collaborations and focused on his radio show.
With nervous thumbs, she texts a reply. Usual Starbucks? When?
His response is quick. ASAP. I'm there now
Now. She didn't anticipate facing Phil to come this instantaneous.
Coming. Be there soon
She is at her university campus. Classes are done for the day and she was on her way to Dan's flat to find some funny internet news to share for next week's radio show. Her plans will be sidetracked.
On the way to Starbucks, she sends a text to Dan. Gonna go library first. Be there at your place a little later.
Take your time a bookworm has gotta read
It's half a truth. She is going to the library, but that is saved for tomorrow. It will be a lie that she crosses her fingers won't come back to haunt her later.
Fifteen minutes later, she arrives at the Starbucks. She enters the coffee shop and immediately spots Phil. He waves her over. Nerves intensifying at every minute, she walks over to his table and takes a seat on the empty chair across from him.
"Hey," she murmurs.
"Hey."
She gulps. There is so much she wants to tell and ask him. Where will she start?
"How's Dan?"
She lets out a shaky breath. "Okay. Sort of. He's still breathing."
"And you?"
"Fine. No terminal illness or anything." She does this when she is nervous. She cracks unnecessary jokes to rid herself of the nerves.
"That's good." There is a white cup with the green Starbucks logo in front of him. He lifts the cup up to his lips and takes a sip.
"Good, if you mean surprise existential crisis's, nightmares, and barely visiting Tumblr."
He bites his lip. "So it's not good. How is he really holding up?"
"Honestly? If it wasn't for BBC Radio, he probably would have literally crawled under a rock and make a home there." She scoots her chair further forward. "Sometimes I come to the flat and see him in the hallway having an existential crisis. It's happening much more since you left. When I sleep over at his flat or mine, in the middle of the I hear him screaming. His nightmares are always about you. He dreams you won't come back or you die before you return." She fiddles with her fingers. "Don't get me started on Tumblr. When he's online, any phan art he finds freaks him out."
"Dan! Wake up!"
"Wh… huh?"
"You had another nightmare again, didn't you?"
"I saw Phil. He was across the street and he was running to me. A car was coming and it… it…"
"It's okay. It wasn't real. It was all in your head. Phil is alive. Phil isn't dead."
Blue irises gaze at her sadly. "Has he… you know…"
"He kisses me. On the cheek. Or forehead. Or nose. Never on the lips. Not since the night before you left."
"Ah." He sips on his drink again.
"Phil, are you really coming back? Dan misses you like crazy. I miss you too. My pancakes don't do justice compared to yours."
"My pancakes are the best. And yes. I thought you knew that."
"I did. Dan, not so much."
"Now you know. But there's one more thing I want you to do first. Then I'll move back."
"Are you sure?"
"Definitely."
She nods. "Tell me."
"There's a song I want you to play on Radio 1…"
~:~
"There's a song from Five Seconds of Summer I want Radio 1 to play."
"Since when did you listen to 5SOS?"
"Since 5SOS helped me survive those weeks away from you two."
Back at her apartment, she looks down at the current list of songs on next week's playlist. Once again, Dan has given her complete control. She had three-fourths of the list done before Phil sent her that text.
She writes down Beside You on the next line. She hasn't listened to all the songs from 5SOS, and this is one she hasn't heard yet. She boots up her laptop and goes onto YouTube. She types down 5SOS Beside You in the search box. She clicks on a lyric video and starts to listen to the song.
A few lines into the song, she understands why Phil chose it.
The silent words are hard to speak
When she talks all I see
"Don't ever leave," she said to me.
Dan did not want Phil to leave. At all.
When we both fall asleep underneath the same sky
To the beats of our hearts at the same time
So close but so far away
She could see this song as fanfic material.
She sleeps alone
My heart wants to go home
I wish I was, I wish I was, beside you
She lies awake, trying to find the words to say
I wish I was, I wish I was, beside you
She could feel Phil's yearning as she listens to the rest of the song. The "she" in the song could easily be replaced with "he" to represent Dan. This must be how Phil felt while he was away. This must be how painful it felt for him to stay away when all he wanted to do was come back.
Another day and I'm somewhere new
I made a promise that I'll come home soon
Bring me back, bring me back to you
So that could explain why she and Dan haven't found any signs of where Phil is.
When the song finishes, she knows what she must do. It was what she tried to do all those weeks ago. Now she can go through with it. She can finish what she started.
They were always meant to be.
She witnessed it during those past several weeks. How Dan struggled to live through the first few days after Phil left. How his nightmares kept coming back even when she soothed him through them. How he immediately switched songs playing on his phone if it started playing a Muse song. How he makes every attempt to make as much physical contact with her, because he lacked the ones he wants from Phil.
Her heart felt as if it was stabbed with a million knives that night when she tried to say goodbye. Tonight, although her heart aches at the thought of doing it again, the hurt has dulled. Phil was right about her and Dan not being ready to let go of each other that night. It was too soon. She tried to say goodbye to him on a night right after he had a fight with Phil. Dan was too fragile that time that her farewell words broke him even more.
A couple of months later, she knows that Dan is in the right place. Dan is at a point where letting go of his feelings for her will hurt less than letting go of Phil. She saw that as soon as she read Phil's letter. His desperation was proof that a day without Phil would kill him more than a day without her.
"The sun and the moon rely on each other," she says to herself. "The earth can't exist without day and night." When Phil left, the earth was in perpetual darkness. As the star, her presence made the darkness stay. She couldn't bring the light the earth truly needed.
Only Phil can do that. Only Phil can provide the sun the earth is dependent on.
She grabs her mechanical pencil and writes down one more song on the list. It's a song her best friend recommended her to listen to when she first got into the artist. She loved the song so much that she turned it into a phanfic (she posted it before she met Phil). As she plays the song through YouTube on her laptop, she basks in every lyric.
Little Do You Know is her (and Dan's) song. Beside You is Phil's song to Dan. The current song playing in her room is Dan's song to Phil. With the third song included, all three songs fully represents what their situation is all about: a love triangle that, on the next radio show, will finally be resolved.
~:~
Nine weeks. It's the ninth week without Phil.
Dan doesn't know how many more weeks he can endure. The nightmares aren't going away. He doesn't have a clue where Phil is. If he did, he would have boarded the tube or survive a bus/taxi ride just to get to where Phil is. He would even book a plane and travel to another continent if Phil left England.
He didn't get to sample all the songs she added to the radio's playlist this week, so the next song he plays on air doesn't grab his attention until it reaches the chorus. Five Seconds of Summer's Beside You causes him to dart his eyes to her and mouth "what the hell?"
The song makes him think of Phil.
Would it be crazy to think it's not a coincidence that she put that song in the list? He shakes his head. He'll ask her about it after the show.
When he plays the last song in the show's list, the title piques his curiosity.
Falling Up by The Cab. Shouldn't it be Falling Down?
In the darkest, you were the only light I remember
Tried your hardest, made me feel alive
Now I can't forget you
It's Little Do You Know all over again. She is trying to tell him something.
What you found was a lost, lonely heart torn into pieces
With you I feel like myself
Is the "I" him? The lyrics do sound so much like him. But who is the "you?" Her?
Nothing but gold when we're together
You were my one forever
Feels like I'm falling, but I never touch the ground
Feeling so right when I'm around you
How could I live without you?
It's like I'm falling, but I'm not falling, I'm not falling down
No. Not her. Phil. The "you" is more like Phil.
Without trying, you knew the words to say
To save me from myself
I can't deny it, never felt this way
Not from no one else
Definitely Phil. Phil is the one that saved Dan when Phil gave him a best friend. Phil is the man of chances, the one that he saw a forever with. He still does. Phil never escaped his mind.
What does this mean? Phil is only ever on his mind. Why would she drive the message further into his skull? Unless…
His eyes widen.
Could Phil be back?
~:~
Phil paces back and forth in the lounge. It feels great to be back in the flat. London is his heart's home. The flat is his sanctuary when the real world stresses him out.
The show is finished and he anticipates Dan's arrival. She did what she asked him. She played Beside You on the radio, as well as a song called Falling Up that Phil is pretty sure is meant to be a hint that he came back. If there is one thing he likes the most about her, it's her ability to use songs to convey secret messages to people.
What will happen? Has Dan made his choice? What will happen to her? What will happen to him? Will he be the third wheel now?
The sound of a doorknob opening stops his pacing. His back turned toward the door, he takes a deep breath.
You're ready. You came back because enough time passed. You're ready to see what Dan decided.
Phil turns around. His eyes meet Dan. Brown to blue. Blue to brown.
"Hi Dan," Phil whispers.
The next few seconds happens as if in slow motion.
Dan bursts into tears. He stumbles across the room, and the younger man tackles Phil. Luckily, Phil prevents them from falling to the floor. He hugs Dan close to him.
"PHIL!" he sobs. "Phil… you're back."
"I am."
"You were gone for over a month."
"I'm sorry. I didn't think it would be that long."
"Don't do that again! I was worried sick!"
"I won't." It's the truth. Nine weeks away from Dan is the longest Phil has ever been away from him since they first met.
Dan's mouth attaches to his neck, peppering light kisses until his soft lips attach to Phil's. The kiss is weeks worth of distance and built-up emotions. They can't pull away. They treat the kiss as if it's their last one.
Dan's mouth inches back. "Please don't leave. I'm sorry I made you leave. You're right. We needed the break. I'm such a fucking idiot for letting you slip away like that."
"Shhh… it's okay, bear. I'm here now."
He hears a sigh. "I guess I've done my job."
He looks over Dan's shoulder. She is watching them with a small smile on her face.
"Thank you," Phil tells her.
She nods. "Can I say something now, if you don't mind?"
Phil nudges on Dan's chest. Dan pulls away from Phil to look at her.
She begins. "In 2009, Dan and Phil met. Years later, the duo left their mark on YouTube and captured the hearts of millions of people with their witty, awkward humor. One of those people was an odd girl with a passion for writing. She watched the videos of two British men that makes her embrace her difference. She became a fangirl for two best friends that gradually fell in love and made Phan a reality.
"In her first year of college, one-half of Phan saw that odd girl in a London Starbucks and chose to sit with her. Out of all the other empty seats available, he chose to sit with the girl that always felt she was invisible. Her wildest dreams come true when she sees that it's danisnotonfire, her number one YouTube idol.
The two talk for the next couple hours and find they have many things in common. They bond beyond the first encounter and become close friends in the span of a few weeks. Who would have known that in a country she dreamed of someday traveling to, she'd be making a friend out of someone that would become more to her than just a friend? Who would've known that her friend's boyfriend would also become a friend to her?
But then the fights between her idols start. She becomes someone Phil is wary of. So when they fight, Dan runs to her, and she, the one that is the source for many of their arguments, becomes his shoulder to lean on. Against her will, the man that she sees herself in is someone she starts falling for. Her innocent crush turns to love. Unbeknownst to her, that man falls in love too. Their feelings grow and grow until he can't hold back and they share their first kiss, a kiss that should have never happened. They're in love each other.
They keep the kiss a secret from Phil. But the kiss puts tension between them. She wants so badly to tell Phil the truth so they can figure out what to do. She isn't the one to tell Phil. It's Dan, who is overwhelmed with the guilt that he blurts it out. Phil doesn't take it well. She goes back to her apartment so she didn't have to witness their fight. At home, she realizes the only way to fix the situation is to let go of her feelings for Dan. So she goes back to their place. When she tries to tell Dan that 'they' could never happen, Phil steps in and cuts it off. She leaves their place with the uncertainty of what will happen to herself. As a porcelain figure, Dan could either fix her or break her.
She avoids him. For two weeks, she cut off communication with Dan. Then a photo surfaces on Twitter that pushes her to break the silence. She plans to do it the next day, but Dan comes over and things change between them. They spend a night like they were true lovers. When morning comes, their worlds are at a loss when they find that Phil left. Phil has given them a chance to be closer, but all it does is make her see that the possibility of her and Dan can never happen. She alone can't give Dan the happiness he deserves."
She steps closer to them. She grabs Dan's hand with one hand, then Phil's with the other. "You two are unbreakable. A woman like me can't change that. For over two years, being your friend made me see that fate wants Dan and Phil together, not Dan and I. I came into your lives not to ruin Phan, but to strengthen it. Though I've caused a lot of heartache, I've also been an antidote. Love may be a curse for me, but falling in love with Dan is the best thing that ever happened to me. It made me learn that there are men in this world that won't intentionally break my heart. There are men that see me for me and love me for who I am."
She lets go of their hands, then move them so the men are holding each other's hands.
"The sun and the moon co-exist so the earth is a sustainable planet. Without light, the earth will be always be cold. Without dark, the earth will always be hot. There must be a balance of day and night. The sun and moon's relationship will always surpass the relationship the moon has with the star. But the star doesn't lose its shine. When the day takes over, the star is still there. It just can't be seen because the sun is brighter."
She takes a deep breath. All the talking has made her breathless.
She's doing it. She's making the choice for Dan.
Her gaze locks on Dan. "I choose for Phan to stay alive. I choose for us to stay as friends."
~:~
"Will you be okay?"
"Eventually, but it's for the best."
"I'm so sorry, love."
"Don't be. We can't fight love. We fought it, and look what happened."
"I'm just like those other guys that broke your heart."
"Dan, you are far from being like those douchebags. At least the one you're with is the one I want you to be with."
Months have passed since that day.
"Are you sure you don't want to stay? We could let you move in with us. You and Dan could talk to yourselves together."
"Thanks, but no thanks. It wouldn't be fair to my family and my best friend."
"We're gonna miss you."
"We've always got VidCon."
"So it's time," Phil says. "Still can't bribe you with a crumpet so you won't leave?"
She laughs. "Nope. Not even for a million dollars."
"Don't worry, I'd go to America too if I could," Dan tells her.
She rolls her eyes. "If you did, you gotta bring Phil too."
Phil shrugs. "I wouldn't mind. Although I don't wanna pay the price for all the things we broke in here."
"Right, because two famous internet stars don't have the money to fix a couple walls and a few floor tiles." She checks her phone. She has to go soon.
"We can always kidnap you," Dan jokes. "Hold you hostage and keep you in our interdimensional vortex."
"Hah! I'd like to see you try."
"We got some rope."
"Why do you…? Never mind. Don't wanna know where that rope has been." She read enough BDSM phan fics to know the kinky things rope can be used for.
She graduated from college with a BA in English Literature. She is working on her first novel, which she hopes can get published someday. Her dreams of being an author is this close to being achieved.
Her friendship with the boys was a bit rocky after Phil's return. She and Dan had a difficult time treating each other as friends. Their feelings for each other haven't fully faded away, but they are at a point where they can be around each other and not be impulsive to kiss each other. They know that their love can't surpass the love Dan has for Phil. Their love is the kind meant to teach her what she wants in a man. The kind of man she wants is someone with a kind heart, someone who would do anything for her and love her unconditionally. Whoever that man will be, she'll just have to wait a little longer to meet him.
With a sigh, she steps forward and gives them a hug. With the love triangle gone, the friendship between the three is stronger than it was before. The two helped her grow out of her shell and start her own YouTube channel as a vlogger. She only had the channel for three months and It has almost 100,000 subscribers. People are fans for her natural geeky charm.
When she pulls back, she reaches into her jacket pocket and gives them a folded piece of white paper.
"A little gift for you two."
Dan unfolds the paper. The two grin when they see the drawing that her roommate did (her friend does the fanart; she does the fanfiction). It's the three of them in a circle, a red line connecting the three of them in the shape of a heart. A star is above her head, a crescent moon above Dan's, and a sun above Phil's.
"Wow," Phil says. "Wait, why is that line attached to our fingers?"
"It represent the red string of fate. According to Chinese mythology, the red string of fate is an invisible thread connected between people destined to meet. Whether they'll become friends or lovers, think of it like soulmates. In other words, no matter how far away I'll be from you two, we'll always be connected."
"Awww…" Dan grins at her. "That's deep."
"Turn the paper around."
Dan flips the paper. "It's a poem."
"I wrote it."
Phil recites the poem out loud. "The sun, the moon, the star. Infinite galaxy, expanse of space. Chances, flaws, and porcelain. Forever and beyond."
"It's cheesy. Poetry isn't my strong suit."
"Cheesy! This is great!" Dan praises.
She flushes. "I tried my best."
"This is a great gift."
"Thanks." She takes a step back. "I really have to go now or else I'll miss my flight."
"No… already?" Phil pulls her in for another hug. "We'll visit you as soon as we can."
"VidCon is a couple weeks," Dan says, encircling his arms around the both of them. "We won't have to wait long."
"Yup."
A couple of minutes later, Phil is opening the front door of their flat. This is it. She is leaving England. She made so many memories here for the last four years. Dan and Phil influenced her life for the better, despite the millions of tears shed along the way.
When she waves at them from the window of a taxi, she watches their figures turn smaller and smaller. The men's linked hands gives her hope that their love will last.
It's the end of her chapter in England.
The woman of porcelain.
The biggest star in Dan and Phil's world, a world with a moon and sun that will no longer fade away.
The end. The tale of Dan, Phil, and the OC is over. What a ride. I apologize if this was too long for a second half.
I chose to do alternating POV's for the third part because I wanted you guys to see how the events unfolding is perceived through the three main characters. I wanted you guys to see through eyes other than Dan's. Phil choosing to leave, the OC choosing to let go of Dan… those were things that couldn't be given justice merely through Dan's POV. It had to be done through their words, through their thoughts themselves.
The way CAP went, it had to end like this. While I worked on chapter 2, I realized Phan was endgame. They always were. Just like the OC said in the first part, Fate brought Dan and Phil together. But to bring their happy ending, Phan had to experience distance. Dan needed to know what it's like to miss Phil. He needed to be with the OC in some way and eventually come to terms with the fact that no matter how much he loves the OC, he'll always love Phil more.
I wrote this story as a way to bring a twist to love triangles. We're used to seeing love triangles with the girl as the central character being the object of affection of two boys, or the boy as the central character being chased after two girls. But what if the rules are twisted? What if it's still two boys and a girl, but one of the boys is the central character instead of the girl? What if the two shippings were able to happen, but yet the central character was able to end up with the one the majority wants him to be with? That's what CAP is about. It's about breaking the love triangle norm. It's about showing what it would be like if Phan was real, but then a girl came into their lives and tested their relationship.
I was mostly inspired by an anime called Vampire Knight and a Filipino teleseries called On the Wings of Love (go Jadine!). Both of those stories dealt with a love triangle in some way. The central character had moments with her love interests. In VK, Yuki was able to be with Kaname and Zero. In OTWOL, Leah and Clark ended up together, yet Leah didn't disregard Simon's feelings and told him it would always be Clark. The element of love triangles from both those stories gave birth to CAP. To me, the makings of a love triangle is for the central character to address both of his/her love interests. Don't overpower one over the other too much. And give the protagonist character for goodness sake. A Jane Doe irritates me.
Thanks so much for reading! Sorry for this long ass author's note, but I needed to get this off my chest. I hope my take on a Phan love triangle has inspired you to change perspectives on love triangles. In my case, I wanted the central character to be bi and one of his love interests to be bi. And, well, Dan and Phil have loads of character, so characterization wasn't too difficult.
Until next time.
~ AA