A/N: Thank you all for your kind words and support regarding Neon. Unfortunately, he passed away last week. His illness began to cause unpredictable aggression, and I could no longer trust him not to bite me or others. His end was as peaceful as I have ever seen. The house is very empty right now, but it is for the best. My established dog misses him a lot, thought he might change his tune when the next foster comes along!

Rosalie POV

Sometimes being part of my family was great. I had parents I adored, a sister I loved, a brother I sometimes loved (and most of the time couldn't stand), and Emmett. Both of my parents were supportive of my storming into a male dominated field and taking over, and I was lucky enough to be able to live at home while I went to school.

Then there were times like this, when my family sucked. Times when Social Services had dropped off yet another loser in need of a home for a few days or weeks. A kid you were supposed to be kind to, yes, but not get overly attached to. The current reject was sitting on the floor of my garage, watching me in silence.

I had been trying to dump Jasper with Alice was much as possible, since she was the one he seemed to be the most comfortable with. But she was busy with Mom at the moment, so I had taken him down here with me, just so he wouldn't be stuck in his room or with another member of the family.

I knew Jasper liked me because I didn't bullshit him. There were rules for staying down here with me. Don't talk too much (not that that was a problem with Jasper), don't touch anything unless I ask you to, and for the love of God, don't tell anyone else that I'm being nice to you.

Those were the rules, and, so far, Jasper had followed them to the letter. In exchange, he was allowed to stay down here, so he didn't have to face the rest of the family. Sometimes he would help by holding a part, or watching one of the diagnostics run, but mostly he just sat on the floor and watched, his back always to the wall. Occasionally he would doze for a few seconds, but usually he just sat alone with his thoughts.

I had been trying to get him to talk a little bit more, with limited success. If I was quizzing him on something I had just explained, he could talk quite a bit, sometimes repeating my explanations word for word. But when it came to anything personal, he clammed up. Unfortunately for him, we were about to have a very personal talk. About sex. Namely, about sex with my sister. I didn't want to make Jasper uncomfortable, especially since this seemed to be one of the only places he could even marginally relax, but Alice's safety was paramount to me.

I took a deep breath and sat down next to him. He game me a questioning look, but he didn't smile. It seemed to me that Alice was the only one he really ever smiled at. "Can we talk?"

He shrugged. "Bout what?"

It was best to be direct. "Alice."

He immediately turned cagey. Like a gazelle, Jasper had a finely tuned sense of danger, and when he might need to protect himself. "What about her?"

Nice try, freako. "You like her."

"Yeah." His words were carefully measured, so he wouldn't give anything away. "I like her."

"You like her like a boyfriend would, not like a brother would." Christ, this was like pulling teeth. I kept my eyes locked on his, not letting him look away. "Don't lie to me, Jasper."

He didn't break eye contact, but he didn't respond either. He just stared, the hopelessness in his eyes overwhelming me. He did like her in that way, I was sure of it now, but he was too tired, too defeated to make even the smallest move. "It's alright if you do." I tried to sound encouraging, something that I wasn't particularly good at.

"No, it's not. I'll leave her alone." I could read his stormy eyes quite clearly. Don't tell Carlisle and Esme, please.

Now was not the time to tell him that Mom and Dad already knew. Actually, probably everyone knew, except him and Alice. "That's not what I meant."

Maybe I should just start over. "I'm screwing this up."

Jasper nodded. "S'ok, I do it all the time."

Call the press, that could be the first joke I had ever heard Jasper make. I grinned at him and slid an arm around his shoulders. He allowed it, even leaning into me the tiniest bit. That alone told me how miserable he was feeling. Jasper hated being touched, and would usually go to great lengths to avoid it. His easy acceptance of it now wasn't a good sign.

I took a few minutes to gather my thoughts, holding him just tightly enough to make him feel secure, but loosely enough to allow him to squirm free if he wanted to. "What I meant was, we can tell that you like Alice a lot. I want to know what for."

"Huh?" He seemed genuinely confused by the question.

The rest of the words were painful to say, but I forced them out with as much venom as I could muster. "I mean, do you just want to fuck her and leave? Because let me tell you something, Jasper, if you do, I'll castrate you right here." I knew exactly what Alice had gone through, and I refused to let another man use her like a living sex toy.

As soon as the words left my mouth, Jasper shot out from under my arm and backed away, his eyes dilating and rolling. He looked beyond terrified. "N-no, I wouldn't."

I could all but smell the fear rolling off of him. His reaction seemed rather extreme, considering that he could easily escape or overpower me, but self defense had never been one of Jasper's strong points. It was enough to make me wonder if he hadn't had the castration threat leveled at him before, by someone far more serious then I was.

"Hey, cool it; I'm not really going to hurt you." If I couldn't get him calmed down, I was going to be in huge trouble. As panicked as he was right now, he was a danger to both me and himself. With the door closed and machines running, there would be no one to hear me if I needed help. I softened my tone and put out a hand. "Listen, I'm sorry."

I started forward, but Jasper backed up, skillfully avoiding my touch. Even when I pressed, he continued to back away until his back hit the opposite wall. I stopped about six feet from him, not wanting to corner him and make things even worse. He was shaking now, a pitiful trembling that encompassed his entire body. Even as I watched, his balance failed and he slid down the wall. I moved forward and crouched in front of him, trying to make myself small. "Hey, now, it's alright. I didn't mean to scare you."

He didn't respond when I sat next to him and ran my hand down his back. It was a mirror scene from a few minutes ago, but that might as well have happened a million years ago. He didn't pull away from me, but only because he was too afraid to move. My voice wavered between placating and firm. I was afraid that, like a dog, he would sense my fear and that would further incite him. "Calm down. Jasper, breathe!" The last part came out a little worried, since I couldn't see his chest, which had been heaving a second ago, moving at all. He released the breath he had been holding with a barely audible sigh. "That's right, just breathe for a minute."

His T-shirt was soaked with sweat, but I barely noticed. I was more focused on trying to comfort him, and keep him from losing it completely. Moving slowly and carefully, I brushed the hair back from his eyes. "See now? I'm not going to hurt you, I promise." Like a promise from me meant anything, considering how quickly I had just turned on him.

Without warning, he turned to me, wrapping his arms around my body and pressing his face to my neck. He was either absolutely desperate for a little affection, or, more likely, doing his best to hold himself together. He breathed against my skin, harsh, hot breaths that betrayed the depths of the struggle. His hold on me was almost painful, but I figured it was the least I deserved. Jasper was just like me, too damaged for such mean comments. "Shhh. It's alright, I won't hurt you."

I kept holding him, running my hand up and down his back. His shaking gradually subsided into occasional shudders. Finally he turned his head, laying his cheek against my chest and closing his eyes. Looking down at him, I noticed something odd. Scared as he had been, there was no sign of tears on his face. No dampness against my neck, no silvery trails where they might have gone down his face. Nothing but the usual dark circles that bespoke of several sleepless nights. It was probably a lack of sleep combined with my cruel words that had caused this little breakdown.

Jasper was quite a bit taller than I was, and his neck was bent at an awkward angle. It caused the neck of his shirt to pull to the side, revealing an ugly set of scars at the side of his collarbone. Tiny round scars that confounded me, until I realized exactly what they were. Cigarette burns. Some so old they had warped as he grew, and some so fresh that they hadn't yet faded to white. Suddenly, his fear made a lot more sense. After all, if it was alright for someone to hold a lit cigarette to his skin, why wouldn't it be alright for someone to cut him? I wondered if he saw his foster mothers face in mine, heard her voice when I spoke. The thought bothered me more than I cared to admit.

Another harsh shiver wracked his body, drawing my attention back to the matter at hand. He seemed to get worse when I talked to him, so I contented myself with rubbing his back, running my fingernails up and down his spine. He needed to put on some weight; I could easily trace each rib. His breathing became even again, and the shaking stopped, but he still didn't move. I didn't either, unwilling to take away the small bit of security he had found.

After what seemed like a small eternity, he picked his head up and looked me in the yes. "I'm sorry." He looked and sounded completely broken.

I wondered how many times Jasper had been told that everything was his fault. Enough that it didn't even occur to him to question it now, even when I was so clearly the one in the wrong. "No, it's my fault." I forced myself to say the next words out loud. "I can be...well, I'm a bitch sometimes."

"I know." He didn't say it like he was condemning me, or like he found it amusing. He just said it. "Sometimes it's the best way to be."

When I looked at him again, I saw a true brother reflected in his sad grey eyes. More than anyone else in the family, Jasper understood suffering, and the person that that suffering could turn you into. The only other person in the family to endure that sort of thing was Alice, but she had the sort of unshakably happy personality that could never become the sort of moodiness that Jasper and I shared. A tiny tendril of love planted itself in my heart when I looked at him. For the first time, I found myself hoping he would stay, and not just because Alice wanted him to. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

I stood up, being careful not to startle my newest brother. He leaned his head back against the metal wall, his eyes a stormy, hazy, grey. I held out my hand to him, mentally making a few calculations. He had woken us up last night, and the night before. Nothing the night before that, but three days in a row at the beginning of the week. Whatever it was that Dad was supposed to be giving him to help him sleep, it wasn't working very well. Jasper slept through the night when his body was so exhausted it gave out on him. He was hitting that point now.

"You need some sleep; you're practically passed out on you feet." I kept my tone as gentle as possible, hoping some part of him still trusted me.

He shrugged. "I'm alright."

Sure he was, and I was the bride of Frankenstein. "Uh-huh, you always look like you're getting ready to collapse. Listen, I have a cot in the back room. Why don't you lay down for a little bit? You don't have to sleep, just rest for a while." I anticipated his refusal and kept going. "I'll stay out here, I promise, and I won't leave."

For a minute he wavered. "Do I actually have a choice?"

Technically, yes, but I wasn't going to let him know that. I had to count on him going along with me, the same way he had gone along with everyone else. "Not really. I thought you might be more comfortable down here, but I could always ask Mom to set you up on the couch..." A look of horror crossed his features, and I knew I had him. There was nothing worse in Jaspers mind than drawing attention to himself, and the thought of having my mother fussing over him all afternoon was enough to convince him that I was the lesser of the two evils.

The decision made, though he wasn't happy about it, he nodded. "Fine, if that will make you happy. Just for a little while though."

"Sure." Now was not the time to push or gloat. After all, I was the one who had caused the panic attack that pushed him over the edge. "Come on."

I led him to the little room off the garage. There was an old army cot in the corner, one that I had made Dad buy when I started really working down here. There were nights when I couldn't sleep, and was more comfortable down here, away from everyone else. Here, I was surrounded by my beautiful cars. It wasn't like being upstairs, where there were people who were supposed to be family, but were still men. Maybe one night they would come sneaking into your bedroom and...I cut myself off there.

Jasper followed after me, still tense. The cot was old, but surprisingly comfortable. It was cold in the back room, since the heater didn't work in there, so I grabbed a quilt from the shelf above the dresser. This one was my favorite, not just for its pattern, but because it was so heavy. There was a comforting weight to this quilt, something that made me feel secure. Hopefully Jasper would get the same benefit. He took off his battered sneakers and curled up on the cot, making himself as tiny as possible. I put the blanket over him and stood up. "Do you want the lights on or off?"

"Off." He gave me a slightly pleading look, but didn't say anything else. Even when I offered him my most encouraging smile, he didn't say anything else. "Do you want something else? Some water or something?" There were bottles in the micro fridge, but I had never offered him one. I had just assumed if he was thirsty he would ask.

He shook his head, his blond hair, much darker than my own, spilling into his eyes. "No, I'm alright."

I wanted to offer something else, to put on some music, or rub his back, or even just sit with him for a while, anything to make up for what I had done to him, but he was making it clear that he just wanted to be left alone. "Alright, I'll be right outside."

He nodded stiffly, turning his back to me and pressing his face into the pillow. His breathing came in strained pants that I could hear from the doorway. I turned the lights off without saying anything else. He didn't so much as twitch.

Once I was out of the side room, I released a breath I hadn't known I was holding. Fuck, this kid was a mess. I guessed I had always known he was, but it still hurt to see it show so clearly. I was going to have to tell Dad about this little breakdown, for Jaspers sake, but doing so would also mean revealing that I had single-handedly caused it. Not something I was really looking forward to, especially since I had been lectured for my rudeness in the past.

The diagnostics I had been running on the old Cougar had long since finished, telling me that the problem was in the break line. I jacked it up and started removing parts. The work was soothing, and I lost myself in it completely.

It was nearly an hour and a half later when I finished and looked at the clock. Close to 3, the rest of the family should be getting home soon. I stripped off my dirty coveralls and washed my hands in the sink. I didn't mind looking like a grease monkey most of the time, but I liked looking sexy when Emmett came home. He was still suspended, of course, but Mom had finally agreed to send him out on some errands. She had stipulated that he was to be home before the rest of the family, so I had to be ready. It gave him something to look forward to all day. I ran a brush through my hair and fixed up my make-up. Perfect.

It was only when I was getting ready to go up and wait for him, that I remembered Jasper. I had promised not to leave him down here alone, and I owed it to him to keep that promise. I carefully removed my three inch heels and snuck across the floor, easing the door open. Jasper was still lying with his back towards me, but his breaths were soft and steady. After a moment's debate, I slid the door almost all the way closed. I was done being loud for the day, and I wanted to be able to hear him if he needed me.

My garage was really my sanctuary, and was set up like a dorm room, with a desk and small refrigerator, and plenty of lighting. Mindful of my promises to stay, I sat down at the desk and started on some coursework. Maybe Emmett would think to come down here, though we would be severely limited in what we could do. I was sure Jasper slept lightly, and the thought of him waking up and seeing me with my boyfriend was an effective libido killer.

Even as I had the thought, I heard the door at the top of the stairs opening. Edward bounded down the stairs, giving me his patented holier-than-thou look. "Is Jasper down here?"

"Hello to you too. I don't recall inviting you down here, so leave." I kept my tone cold enough to freeze molten lava. I had never liked Edward, even when he was only 10 and I was 13. He could be almost frighteningly controlling, in a way that reminded me of Royce, may that bastard rot in hell. He thought I was a bitch, which was true, I thought he was an asshole, which was also true, and that pretty much summed up our relationship.

His eyes narrowed, glinting dangerously. "Mom wants Jasper and I can't find him anywhere else. He must be down here."

Little boy had no idea who he was messing with, if he thought he was going to be able to intimidate me. It drew myself up to my full height, thankful that I had remembered to put my heels back on. With their added inches, I was taller than Edward, and twice as frightening. "He's sleeping."

"So wake him up." It never failed to amaze me that, after six years of not winning once, Edward continued to try and engage me in power struggles.

"No." My tone was dripping with acid, and he backed down immediately. Wimp.

"Mom needs him." He was whining now, a sure sign that I had him on the run.

"Tell him he's with me and he's asleep. That'll make her happy." I wasn't about to back down on this.

"It's alright, Rosalie, I'm awake." Jasper was leaning against the doorframe, rubbing at his eyes. "I appreciate you letting me stay down here."

I smiled at him, lightly patting his shoulder. "No problem. You're welcome any time." I made sure to emphasize the last part, letting Edward know just whom it was that I liked best.

If he noticed, he hid it well. "Come on Jasper, I'm sure Rosie has better things to do than interact with the peons."

If Jasper hadn't been there, and still so fragile, I would have killed Edward, or at the very least, broken his nose. But I didn't want to upset him twice in one day, so I forced a smile. "He's right, Jasper, I don't want to be around the commoners. Why don't you be my Lancelot? Emmett's already my King Arthur, and Edward here can be the court jester."

They were halfway up the stairs before Edward turned and smirked at me. "She slept with Lancelot, you know."

He was gone before my fury subsided enough for me to think of a suitable reply. Ooh, I hated him so much! Jasper didn't seem to mind him, though. Actually, Jasper got along pretty well with all of us kids. It was just Mom and Dad he didn't trust. I made sense, though. Jasper was used to living in a kid dominated world. Adults were abusive, untrustworthy, or just plain absent. His very survival depended on him being able to make friends and alliances with people his own age.

Since there was no one around to witness my little temper tantrum, I threw my textbook into the opposite wall. Edward wasn't that bad, really. Sure, he wasn't anyone I would have ever chosen to be friends with, but that could be said about any number of people that I still managed to tolerate. But there was just something about him that brought out the absolute worst in me. The fact that he had just implied that I was a whore wasn't something I was going to forget any time soon. I was also wise enough to know that I brought out the worst in him also. After all, he and Alice were best friends, so he couldn't be nearly as creepy around her as he was around me.

I heaved an irritated sigh. If Edward was home, that meant that everyone else was also, and it was later than I thought. I frequently lost power down here, and the clock was very often wrong. Unfortunately, it also meant that Dad was home, and I was going to have to tell him about what had happened with Jasper.

A part of me wanted to pretend that it hadn't happened at all, and just let things go. I knew that Jasper wouldn't tell on me, and chances were good that no one would ever find out. But I knew that that wasn't a fair thing to do. Carlisle needed to know that Jasper was having panic attacks, and what had triggered this one. Lying about his problems wouldn't make them go away, and in many cases, it made things worse. I was feeling protective of Jasper now, and if getting to the root of his problems meant having to tell on myself, so be it.

"Rose, honey, it that you?" Mom called me from the living room, where she and Alice were looking over paint samples. "We're going to do Jasper's room blue, what do you think about this shade?"

I wrapped my arms around her. "Shouldn't Jasper be making the choice? I thought that was what you wanted him for."

"Oh, no, I just wanted him to know he had a doctor's appointment for early tomorrow, so he couldn't count on being able to sleep in. I'm going to let him pick of course, but he gets so overwhelmed when you give him too many choices that I wanted to narrow it down a little."

I looked over the choices, and chose a soft blue-green shade. It reminded me of the ocean, soothing and deep. Hopefully Jasper would find it calming also. "That one. Where is he now?"

"Your brothers took him outside to play ball. Emmett is convinced he's going to be able to play by spring."

Once Emmett got an idea into his head, it was difficult, if not impossible, to shake it loose. If he needed to, he would make time to practice with Jasper every single day, until his new brother was up to speed.

"Good for them. Is Dad home?" The sooner I got this over with, the better.

"In his office." Alice spoke for the first time, her dreamy eyes focusing on mine. "He's pretty pissed with social services, so tread lightly."

I gave Mom a quick kiss, and ran up the stairs. The door to the third floor creaked when I opened it, alerting him to my presence. Dad's eyes lit with surprise when he saw it was me standing there. I seldom sought him out for any reason, much less when it would involve being alone together. He turned away from the window. "Rose, what a surprise. What can I do for you?"

Now that I was actually up here, my courage failed. "Uh...well, it's about Jasper."

He nodded. "How is he doing with you? He seems to be getting along alright with his brothers."

I followed his eyes, realizing I could see the three of them playing from the window. They ran in and out of sight, tossing the ball to one another. I watched Emmett lob it to Jasper, who fumbled and dropped it. He picked it up immediately, though, and threw it to Edward. "He has trouble with his hand." It wasn't what I had come up here to say, but it was something I had noticed over and over when he helped me. He could move all his fingers, and close them into a fist, but his grip was weak, and he frequently dropped things.

"The right one? Yes, I know. The director was supposed to fax over a list of approved physical therapist two weeks ago, but it hasn't come yet." He sighed. "Maybe I should just take him to the hospital with me and find someone for him there."

"I would." God knew if we waited on social services, Jasper would not only be aged out of the system, he would be old enough to qualify for Social Security. "It's good for him to play ball though, right? Won't that help him out?"

Dad nodded. "It will, but he needs more than that if he's going to have any chance of getting normal function back."

It had never occurred to me that the damage might not be temporary. Jasper was only 17 years old, how could he possibly be permenantly damaged? What did that say about the rest of us? "Oh."

When I looked out the window again, the boys were picking up their bats and heading around the corner of the house. After an unfortunate incident involving a baseball and one of our picture windows, they had been forbidden from batting within 100 yards of the house. They would go to a little meadow and practice hitting there.

I watched them until they were out of sight, before turning back to face him. "I screwed up with Jasper today."

He sat down and looked into my eyes. "What happened?"

"I...I threatened him." I couldn't bring myself to repeat exactly what I had said. "He freaked out."

"Why did you threaten him? Tell me exactly what happened." Dad didn't sound angry, but his blue eyes were suddenly intense. "Don't leave anything out."

So I repeated what had happened, from Jasper coming down to work with me, to our confrontation, to Edward coming and taking him away. "I didn't mean to scare him like that." My voice had become small, belonging to that little girl who had been sure Carlisle and Esme would reject her for the slightest mistake.

Dad rubbed at his eyes. "I'm sure you didn't. We're all still trying to figure out just what it is that upsets Jasper, and how to avoid it. Rose, I know you love Alice, and you're just trying to protect her. Believe me, I want to protect her too, and I'm going to be having a talk with Jasper, but you have to be more gentle. He's very fragile."

Normally, I would have snorted at the thought of a teenaged boy being considered "fragile" for any reason. They weren't fragile, they were big, dumb, smelly creatures, whom could be trusted only to make disgusting noises and try and screw anything in a skirt.

But Jasper was different. Whether it was due to what he had suffered, or he just had an exceedingly gentle personality, he did seem fragile. The memory of his pleading eyes earlier in the garage stuck with me. He needed us, needed me, to take care of him, because he wasn't capable of doing it for himself. Not now, and maybe not for a long time. The protective part of my nature surged up, making space for him where there had previously been room for nothing but Emmett.

"I know. I'll do better with him." I would, too. I was Rosalie Goddam Cullen, previously Rosalie Hale, and I wasn't about to back down from this challenge.

When Dad smiled at me, it made me feel bad for all the times I had been rude to him, or turned him away. He loved me, of course he did, and not in that creepy sex-toy way that Royce had loved me. Dad loved me for who I was, with all my faults.

My thoughts were broken by yelling coming from downstairs, rapidly followed by footsteps on the stairs. Edward broke through the door without knocking. "Dad! Dad, I need you!"

His flushed face and heaving chest told me that he had run all the way from the meadow. "Dad I need you!" Fear caused him to repeat himself.

Dad was already standing up, reaching out to hold his son. "Edward, what's wrong?"

"It's Jasper. Dad, he's having a seizure!"