A/N: I forgot to thank my loyal readers for their sympathy regarding Neon's passing. He is very missed, but at peace now. Life moves on, and I have a new foster, Grimm. Luckily he is easy going and leaves me plenty of time to write. Thank you to everyone who has reviewed. I wish allowed me to reply to every one, but alas, the rules.

Jasper's POV

I hurt. Not just a little, but everywhere. I kept my eyes closed, trying to figure out what had happened before I let anyone know I was awake. I could tell there was someone in the room with me, and who knew if they were friendly or not? Let's see. Light was touching my closed eyes, so I wasn't on my mattress in the basement. The padding underneath me was hard and uncomfortable, so I wasn't on the couch. I must be on the loveseat in the den.

That wasn't a good sign — not a good sign at all. The only reason Pete would have put me on the loveseat instead of the much more comfortable couch was because the crimson fabric better masked bloodstains. The sour, coppery, taste in my mouth confirmed that I had been bleeding.

What had happened? Try as I might, I couldn't remember. I must have done something terrible, because it literally felt like every muscle in my body was bruised. Most of the time she just focused on one body part (unless she got into a kicking mood, at which point it would be one body part plus my ribs or side).

I stretched my senses out, trying to read the other person in the room. Years of life in this house had made me very good at recognizing people by the emotions they put off, rather than anything else. I didn't feel any anger radiating off this person, so it probably wasn't Maria. But they also didn't have the easy calm of Peter. The hard breathing suggested a male, so it wasn't Charlotte, either. Please God, don't let it be any of the little kids. They had been through enough already — they didn't need to see me like this.

Cautiously, I tried to open my eyes. Instantly, I was blinded by what felt like an entire sun's worth of light. I immediately closed them again, my head starting to pound. This was much worse than I thought. If it was Maria, and if she were being tricky, she not only knew that I was awake, she knew that I was helpless to defend myself.

A chair scraped as the figure rose. They crossed the room, moving away from me, and the light against my painful eyes dimmed at bit. Then they came towards me and lightly touched my face. "Jasper? Can you try opening your eyes again?"

It was a stranger. Paradoxically, that actually made me feel calmer. Like everyone else, I had gotten numerous 'stranger danger' lectures, but they had never stuck with me. After all, the real danger was at home, from the people I knew. How could a stranger be worse than that?

Maria had also schooled me to be unquestioningly obedient, so I forced my eyes open again. The man looking at me was familiar. I blinked a few times before it came crashing back. This was Carlisle, and I lived with him now. He had actually seemed quite kind, and I had been coming to like him. Why had he put me in the hospital?

I tried to ask, to make my lips form the word 'why,' but all that came out was a raspy breath. It felt like my entire throat had turned to dust. Carlisle seemed to understand, and poured me a cup of water from the pitcher beside the bed. I started to reach for it, but realized that my good hand was tethered by an IV, and I didn't trust my bad hand to be able to hold the cup well enough.

He seemed to sense my distress, and used the little control to sit the bed up. I used to love those controls, before I had to spend a month in the hospital with nothing better to do than raise and lower the bed a hundred times a day. Let me tell you, the fun wears off really quick. Once he had me mostly upright, he slid a hand behind my neck and held the cup to my lips.

I waited for the reflexive tensing of my muscles, my normal reaction to being touched, but it never came. Either I was so desperate for water that it was overriding everything else, or I was just hurting so badly that I was unwilling to cause myself more pain, even unconsciously.

Or you're starting to trust him.

I told my inner voice to shut the fuck up, and gulped at the water Carlisle was offering. I didn't trust him. I just needed him for right now. I would play the part of the dutiful and grateful foster son, and he would play the part of the martyr who had taken in this fucked-up creature and given him a chance at a normal life. Then, when I hit eighteen, I would quietly disappear, and life would go back to normal for him. See? Everybody won.

After I had drained the cup (and would have gladly drained ten more, except Carlisle thought I might get sick if I had too much, too soon), he set it back down and looked me in the eyes. "How are you feeling?"

Like I've been hit by a Mack truck, asshole — how do you think I'm feeling? What the hell did you do to me, anyway? But there was no way I could force that many words out, so I just whispered "Bad," followed by a miserable fit of coughing.

He waited until I was done, gently rubbing my shoulder. When it was finally over, he sat on the edge of the bed. "Do you know why you're here?"

Because I pissed you off and finally got what's been coming to me for more than two weeks? Something told me that he wouldn't appreciate my sarcasm. Maria certainly never did. "No."

"You had a seizure at the house yesterday afternoon. We had to call the ambulance, and they brought you here. You've been sleeping pretty much since then. Any of this sound familiar yet?"

I sensed that he wanted it to sound familiar, so I backed my memories up carefully. I remembered being in the basement garage, and having a fight with Rosalie (okay, she fought and I just freaked out, but I had to salvage some of my pride), then taking a nap. Let's see, I had woken up when Rosalie and Edward had started fighting, and then gone to talk to Esme. Emmett had finally come home from the store, and he had wanted to work on my baseball skills, so I had gone with him and . . . and . . . I wasn't sure what had happened then.

"No. Emmett wanted to play ball." My mind, slow as it was right now, was still moving a lot faster than my mouth could.

He nodded. "Yes. You were out playing ball with Emmett and Edward, and you collapsed out there. You don't have a history of seizures, so what do you think might have caused this one? Does anything stick out in your mind as having happened yesterday?"

He was the doctor; why didn't he tell me what had happened? I shook my head.

"They want to keep you here for a few days, so they can run tests on you and try to figure out what happened." He stopped for a second, as if weighing his words, and finally continued. "Jasper, there's something that we have to discuss."

Here it came, the old 'it's not you, it's me,' discussion, and a move to a different home. Nice. I had never been abandoned while I was in the hospital before. Well, I guessed technically that was what had happened with Maria, but I'm pretty sure she didn't want to give me up — she was forced to. She might not have liked me, but she certainly didn't want what she was doing to me to come to light. "Okay?"

For another second he was quiet, probably going over his options in an attempt to break it to me gently. "Jasper, you're old enough and mature enough for me to be completely honest. You suffered a very serious head injury, and many times there are long-term effects from that, effects that you might not see right away . . ." His voice trailed off.

In other words, I'm fucked up, but they aren't really sure how fucked up yet. Got it. Great. I wasn't really sure what he wanted me to say to that, so I went with the obvious. "Okay."

He seemed to gather his courage. "This seizure may not be an isolated incident. It's entirely possible that you may end up with epilepsy or a similar seizure disorder." He stopped to see how I was taking this.

Not well. I wasn't even completely sure what epilepsy was, except you had seizures and couldn't do things like drive or live by yourself. What was going to happen to me now? I felt traitorous tears start to well up in my eyes, but forced them down. No matter how bad things got, I wouldn't give him the pleasure of seeing me cry. "Oh."

He must have read my face, because he went on gently. "That might not even be the case, but it's something I want you to be prepared for. Do you have any questions for me?"

My head was hurting worse and worse, and it loosened my tongue. "Where am I going to live?" I couldn't afford to live on my own, and I didn't think seizures were enough to keep you in some sort of hospital.

He seemed confused. "With us, of course. This doesn't change us wanting to keep you."

I just looked at him. Of course it meant he didn't want to keep me. At least, it ought to. "How come?"

A thousand different answers passed through his eyes before he finally settled on one. "Because we love you, even if you don't love us. Yet."

There wasn't much that I could say to that, because it was true, at least the part about me not loving them. Maybe I loved Alice. Maybe. I certainly liked her the best. I also liked Emmett, and Edward and Rosalie. I even guessed I liked Carlisle and Esme. It was a grudging sort of like, but it was there all the same. "I like you." It was as far as I could force myself to go.

He nodded. "That's a step in the right direction. It may not even turn out to be an issue. But no matter what, you will have a home with us."

Luckily, I was saved from having to reply by Emmett bursting into the room. "I brought food! Jasper, you're awake! Good thing, man!"

I was starting to think that Emmett didn't say anything that didn't end in exclamation points. "Hey."

He held up a bag from Hardees. "I got three different types of biscuits, so you can have first pick. I also brought milk and OJ. It's okay, Dad, I can do Jasper watch for a while. You go and get some rest."

Had Carlisle stayed here all night long? Why? Just to watch me and see if I had another seizure? Or was it because he was worried about me? I didn't ask, though. Not so much because I was afraid that he would tell me that he hadn't, but because I was afraid that he would tell me that he had.

Carlisle studied me for a few minutes, as if asking if that were all right. I shrugged, and immediately regretted the movement. My head was hurting less, but all of my muscles still ached. "S'okay with me."

He lightly touched the side of my neck. "Okay, then. If you need anything at all, you call me at home. I'll bring it as soon as I can. Esme is going to come in about noon, and Alice will be here as soon as she gets out of school." He turned to Emmett. "I want to know if anything, and I mean anything, happens, okay? Let me know if you need to leave, because I don't want Jasper left alone."

I could tell that he was reluctant to leave, but he did in the end. Emmett watched him go, his expression unreadable. I wondered if being stuck here with me was just another part of his punishment while he was suspended. Once he was sure that Carlisle was gone, he turned to me and grinned. "So, you want a Coke? I can go get one from the vending machine. I brought a few DVDs for us to watch, so it's going to be a good day."

It did sound like a good day, but it wasn't really fair to him to be trapped in a hospital room all day long, playing nursemaid to me. "You don't have to stay, you know. I'll tell Carlisle that you did."

He pulled the chair over next to the bed. "Nah, you aren't going to get rid of me that easily. Nice try, though. So, you want to watch the first season of Buffy, or you cool with a Harry Potter marathon?"

Apparently, Emmett had a fixation on the supernatural. I had never watched Buffy, but I had seen the first Harry Potter movie. Granted, I had spent a large portion of the movie with Jackson in my lap after he got frightened by the greasy-looking professor, but at least I had some clue as to the plot. "Harry Potter."

He gave me a huge grin. "Okay, then. I'll get us some sodas while it cues up."

"Okay." I couldn't help the pleasure that washed through me at the fact that someone actually wanted to spend time with me. I had given Emmett the out, and he had refused to take it, so that must mean he liked me, too, at least a little bit. It made me feel good that someone else in the house was willing to put up with me. Alice obviously was, and Rosalie, too, but it was important to have Emmett on my side. He was the biggest person in the house, after all.

He was nice enough to open my soda for me, and give me the bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit, even though he claimed that it was his favorite, too. Then he put the footstool up on the chair and we settled down to watch in a companionable silence.

It was one of the things I liked best about Emmett: he knew when to just be quiet. Any other family member would have been hanging over me, fussing about how much I had eaten, what I had eaten, and doing everything but peeing for me. Emmett helped out as much as I needed, then left me to do the rest myself.

The movie was engaging, but I caught my attention trying to wander. What would it be like if I had some sort of magical power? Casting spells would be fantastic, but really, anything would do. Things would be so much easier if I had super strength, or speed, or the ability to read minds. The only things I was good at were reading people's moods and not dying when I should have. Not that staying alive wasn't a good thing, but it would be nice to have a superpower that would prevent me from getting into bad situations in the first place.

Despite nearly seventeen hours of unconsciousness, I started to get a little sleepy, and dozed on and off during second movie. Emmett was kind enough not to say anything, just turned the volume down a bit and quit making comments. I reminded myself to be nicer to him when I got home. No, scratch that, when I got back to the Cullens' house. Couldn't let myself get too comfortable calling it home just yet.

Lunch and the fourth movie arrived simultaneously. Emmett fussed with the DVD controls while I looked in horror at the gelatinous gloop on my tray. Some sort of meat, possibly beef, possibly pork, lay half covered in rapidly congealing gravy. A limp salad was in another dish, along with a thimbleful of ranch dressing. The only thing that looked remotely edible on the entire tray was an apple, which I snatched immediately. Oh, well, I guessed I had eaten worse.

"Ewww, what is that?" Emmett had come over to poke at my food with the complimentary plastic silverware. "Is it cat?" The innocence in his expression cracked me up, and we laughed together for a minute. "Seriously though, no brother of mine is going to eat that crap."

Before I could tell him that it was all right, he had whipped out his phone and was dialing numbers. There was a moment's pause, and his voice turned sickeningly sweet. "Rosie? Baby? Listen, Jasper and I are at the hospital, and we need some lunch . . . I know." He rolled his eyes and made a 'yap yap yap' gesture with his hand. "Because, dad wanted someone to be with him all the time, and anyway, it's fucking boring in here; he'd be lost without me." Another pause, probably while Rose explained that she couldn't spend the break between classes running errands for her boyfriend and her foster brother. "I love you, baby. Here he is."

I was more than a little apprehensive about getting on the phone with Rosalie, considering how I had behaved the last time we were together, but Emmett shoved the phone into my hand. "Tell her what you want."

"Hello, Rosalie. You really don't have to get me anything. I'll be all right." As her boyfriend, Emmett might be able to get away with asking for something like that, but I didn't command the same respect.

She laughed into the phone, the sound like running water. "It's all right, Jasper. I was planning to come by and see the two of you, anyway. There's a McDonald's across the street from the hospital; is that all right with you?"

"Yes." Anything was all right with me, but both Esme and Carlisle had been after me to have stronger opinions about things. Rosalie made it easy for me to have opinions, because it was very clear what she wanted me to say. I just went along with it.

"What do you want? I already know what to get Doofus over there."

It was a simple question, but my mind went suddenly and totally blank. I couldn't remember ever eating a meal at McDonald's, which was ridiculous, since I took the little kids there all the time. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to force myself to relax. If I could calm down, I could remember the correct words to get what I wanted. Holly, huck, hand, hamster, handle, hard, help, had, hamburger. That was it, a hamburger! Sometimes it took a little bit for my brain to get back into the correct gear. "A hamburger and a Coke."

"Fries, too?" She sounded a little distracted, like she was writing this down.

"Please." I loved French fries, and wasn't above eating the leftovers from the little kids' happy meals. Belatedly, I remembered my manners. "Thank you, Rosalie."

"No problem, darling; I'll be there in about half an hour." Apparently, I had done something to redeem myself in her eyes. Good thing; now I just needed to know what it was.

Emmett took the phone back and said his goodbyes, lingering a bit to tell her how much he loved her. I didn't want to be the creepy guy who listened in, but I couldn't help myself. I wanted someone to do that for me, to linger on the phone and whisper how much they loved me until we finally hung up together. But that probably wasn't going to happen.

I hadn't been lying when I told Esme that I had never had a girlfriend. Girlfriends might be well meaning, but they asked too many questions, and worried about you when they would be better off just leaving things be. Girlfriends would want to kiss, and probably go further, and that was no good. She might wonder where all my bruises and scars had come from, and I couldn't let that happen. Plus, no one would understand why I couldn't go on dates or do much of anything. Maria always needed me to watch the smaller kids.

But, just once, I wanted someone to look at me like I was the most special person in the entire world, the way Rose looked at Emmett. Actually, it would be nice if someone would look at me like I was special at all. Okay, I guessed Alice looked at me like I was special. I couldn't figure out why, but it was a pretty great feeling. Not that I was, or ever could be, good enough for her, but it made me happy nonetheless.

"So, movie?" Emmett drew me back into reality. Nope, I was still just plain old Jasper, with the scarred-up body and fucked-up brain. But you're still special to Alice.

"Yeah." Despite having drowsed through a large portion of the second movie, and the beginning of the third, I was pretty sure that I could follow the plot of this one. I was feeling a lot stronger, and more alert. My muscles still ached, but it was a dull ache now, one I could easily push to the back of my mind.

We watched for about fifteen minutes, before Emmett shot upright. I jumped at the sudden movement, but didn't get as fearful as I usually did. He was a big guy, but a real teddy bear. I would be fine with him. "Holy fuck, that looks like Edward!"

I squinted at the screen. "Where?"

"He's off now, lets see if they show him again." He leaned forward, totally fixated on the screen. I looked too, but the people all sort of blended together for me. "There! I think his name is Patrick."

Sure enough, the actor did bear a striking resemblance to my foster brother. "I see it now. It does look like Edward, only Edward is more . . ." I trailed off, trying to think about exactly what it was that bothered me about the comparison. "I don't know."

"You'll get it." Emmett was again immersed in the movie.

This was another thing I really liked about Emmett. If I lost a word, or got suddenly shy, he didn't baby me or try to put words in my mouth. Instead he would wait patiently until I got it on my own. I had no doubt that he would stick up for me if I really needed it though. With the pressure off, I quickly found the correct terms. "This guy, this Patrick, he seems really confident, like he's a people person. Edward's more shy."

While most people probably wouldn't have seen that as a physical difference, I did. I had seen pictures of myself when I still lived with my biological mom, then my first foster home, right up until the picture that Alice had taken with the digital camera the day before yesterday. The happy, charismatic child looked absolutely nothing like the shy, introverted adult, even when I was smiling. If you're outgoing, it shows on every part of your body, from your eyes to your smile to the way you hold yourself. I just didn't have that anymore.

"I don't think it's so much that Eddie is shy, I just think he's very self-sufficient. He doesn't really need anyone else to make him happy. Except Bella, of course, he's been downright nauseating since he hooked up with her."

That was certainly true. I was pretty sure if I heard one more "Oh, baby, I love you soooooo much," my teeth would rot out from the sweetness. "Yeah."

We exchanged weary grins, the look of two guys who have found out that their brother is completely pussy-whipped. Not that Emmett was far behind him in that department, but at least he didn't sit up at night composing music for his girlfriend. Dirty limericks, yes; sonatas, no.

We watched for another few minutes, during which time I determined that the character was 'Cedric' and not 'Patrick,' before Rosalie appeared, balancing two big bags of food and some drinks. "Emmett, come help me."

By 'help,' she apparently meant 'take all the bags so I can go over and look at Jasper.' She surprised me by leaning over and kissing me on the cheek. "How are you feeling?"

It seemed to be the question of the day. "Better."

"Good." She pulled the tray over the bed so she could set up my food. The rejected hospital lunch was still sitting there. She pulled the napkin off the plate and gaped in horror. "Oh my God, what is that?"

Emmett smirked. "Cat."

"Looks like it." She popped the straw in my drink and opened all three burger containers. "Okay, let's eat."

For a few minutes, we were quiet, all enjoying our meals. Suddenly, Rosalie looked up. "Hey, that guy looks a lot like Edward. Less constipated, though."

I couldn't help the bark of laughter that exploded out of my chest. She was right; Edward did look like he had something jammed up his ass most of the time.

Much to my surprise, I was able to eat almost all of the food that Rose had brought. My appetite was good these days, but sometimes food that had sounded fantastic when I asked for it turned my stomach when it was actually put in front of me.

I supposed it was a good sign that I was no longer shoveling down everything that was put in front of me, regardless of whether I was hungry or not. There always seemed to be plenty of food in the Cullen house, so my worries about running out had lessened. Well, they had lessened mostly because I was building up a stash of non-perishables in the back of my closet, but at least they were lessening. I needed to have that food there, just in case.

Rose stayed with us for nearly an hour, almost long enough to finish the movie. By the end of that time, I was starting to regret eating that much food. She had large-sized everything, and except for a few French fries, I had managed to eat it all. I didn't feel sick, exactly, but the food seemed to be heavy in my stomach. She picked up the trash and leaned over to give me another quick kiss. I surprised myself by turning my head so she would have an easier time reaching me. There was just something comforting about Rosalie, even though she had upset me yesterday.

To tell the truth, I actually admired her for doing that. She had been willing to throw all politeness aside in defense of her family. She had been tough, even when she was facing someone far larger and stronger than herself. As soon as I had backed down, so had she. She wasn't punishing me, not like Maria used to; she was just letting me know how things stood. Alice was her sister, and she would protect her at all costs. I even agreed with her. After all, I would protect Alice, also.

She drew me back to the moment by laying a hand on my face. "You're warm; are you feeling okay? Emmett, does he feel warm to you?"

I stiffened a little at the sight of Emmett's enormous hand coming for my face, but his touch was nearly as gentle as his girlfriend's. "Yeah, I guess."

"I'll say something to the nurse. Bye, baby; bye, Jasper."

We said our goodbyes back, barely noticing that we had missed the end of the movie. It was getting close to the time Esme was supposed to be here, and there was something that I needed Emmett for before she arrived. "I need to get up."

His eyes rolled over to meet mine. "I don't think you're supposed to do that. Dad told me not to let you start roaming the hallways, and that you should stay in bed."

"I need to pee." I had needed to go for a while now, but I had been too embarrassed to say so in front of Rosalie. "I can do that by myself, but I need a little help standing up." Hopefully, I would be able to do it by myself.

Instantly he came to my side and slid an arm around my shoulders. "One . . . two . . . three." At the final number, he coaxed me upright.

My knees promptly gave out, and I would have collapsed to the floor if he hadn't been holding me. Every muscle in my body screamed, as if I had been running for days on end instead of lying in a hospital bed. My equilibrium was all shot to hell, and I wavered pitifully. Fantastic.

"Maybe I should get a nurse." Emmett was definitely nervous about this.

"No, it's all right." I forced my legs to stiffen up. They did, and I took an experimental step forward. "See?"

He didn't look entirely convinced, but he steadied me as we crossed the room. "Uh, you sure you don't need me to go with you?"

Much as I might have liked him to, I didn't feel close enough to him enough to pee in front of him. "No, that's all right. Just . . . kind of stay outside the door, okay?"

"Sure." He seemed relieved that I didn't need him to come inside.

Not as relieved as I am, buddy.

I looked at myself in the mirror while I took care of business, noticing how terrible I looked. I had a big bruise on the side of my face, and my face was whiter than paper. No wonder Emmett had wanted me to stay in bed. I looked like Death warmed over. Not to mention the continually growing discomfort in my stomach. All in all, it was not a good look for me.

Finally done, I hobbled over to the sink and washed my hands. Voices in the room caught my attention, and I padded back out, leaning against the IV pole for support. The nurse was right in the middle of chewing Emmett out for letting me leave my bed.

Time for a little damage control. I made my pitiful way back out and gave the nurse my most winning smile. "I'm sorry, but I really had to use the bathroom."

She wasn't impressed. "Then you should have pushed the call button and a nurse would have brought a bedpan."

Oh, Hell, no. I had been forced to suffer the indignities of a bedpan the last time I was hospitalized, and I wasn't eager to repeat the humiliation. I would drag myself to the bathroom, even if I had to crawl. "No."

It was almost funny to see Emmett's jaw drop. Ever since I had come to live with him, I had been nothing but sweet and complacent. Even now, I didn't raise my voice. I just locked my eyes on the nurse's and made it deadly clear that I meant business. I couldn't push back against Carlisle or Esme, but I would be damned if I was going to let someone else dictate my bathroom habits.

Unfortunately, I wasn't the first difficult patient she had had to deal with. "Fine. Either you can use the bedpan, or you can use the toilet, but you'll have to leave to door open. Your choice."

I didn't back down, but I didn't say anything else, either. With several patients to watch over, she couldn't stop me from doing what I wanted. She read the defiance in my eyes. "This is for your own good. If you were to have another seizure in the bathroom, not only would nobody know and be able to help you, but you might hit something on the way down and hurt yourself."

Her words made sense, but I wasn't in the mood to hear them. Actually, I wasn't in the mood to do much except curl up around my painful stomach and pity myself. So I just glared at her. Emmett stepped in to break the tension, helping me back into bed. Then he had to open his mouth and betray me. "Can you check his temperature? I think he has a fever."

I yanked my arm out of his grip, shooting him an evil death glare. He shrugged. "Sorry man, but I don't want to see you hurt."

That was too bad, considering that, at the moment, I would like nothing better than to hurt him. Words failed me, but I felt a furious growl building up in my chest. How could he just throw me to the wolves like that?

The nurse left, giving me a stern glance that suggested she would do whatever was necessary to ensure I cooperated with her. I gave Emmett another dirty look and climbed into bed. Well, I attempted to climb into bed. My stupid bad knee gave out and I ended up needing Emmett to help me. "This doesn't mean I'm not pissed with you."

He gave a hearty chuckle. "That's all right, I'm used to it. Fuck, Rosie gets pissed at me about every third day."

For some reason, it was hard to stay angry with Emmett. True, he often blurted out things that were better kept private, but he didn't have a malicious bone in his body. "Yeah, I noticed."

The nurse returned, this time with an intern for backup. She held up a thermometer and a paper cup of pills. I weighed my options, but it was three against one (I was counting Emmett in with them), and I could tell when I was outgunned. So I let her stick the thermometer under my tongue, contenting myself with glaring evilly.

No one seemed even mildly perturbed by it. Of course, the thermometer jammed in my mouth and the fact that I could barely stand up probably made me look ridiculous rather than dangerous. The damn thing beeped, and Nurse Evil pulled it out of my mouth. "101.8. Do you hurt anywhere else?"

There was a brief moment where I considered lying, but it didn't take long for me to determine that the only one who would be hurt by that was me. "My stomach is kind of sick."

She seemed to soften a bit. "There's a flu going around, and you probably have a touch of it." She left and came back a minute later with something she injected into my IV. "This is Reglan; it'll help with the nausea." She held out the pills, which I took with the last of my soda. "Fever reducers. Let me know if you have any other symptoms." She was crisp, cool, and efficient, a quality that all nurses seemed to share, regardless of the hospital.

Whatever bravery had possessed me earlier fled, leaving me exhausted and no better than I had been before. Why didn't I just give in in the first place? God knew sticking up for myself had never gotten me anywhere in the past.

"Jasper!" The voice was warm, and I turned instinctively towards it. Esme had been in the doorway when she spoke, but now she was striding across the room to give me a hug. "Oh, baby, you have no idea how happy it makes me to see you awake!"

Normally I would have objected to being referred to as 'baby,' but I was going to let it slide this time. She obviously pleased to see me, so they least I could do was act polite.

Ever the mother, she lightly smoothed the hair back from my face, frowning when she felt the heat there. "The nurse already said I have a fever, and gave me something."

Another gentle stroke. "I had to pick both Alice and Edward up at school today — they're sick too. I guess you caught it from one of them."

Or I had given it to both of them. My stomach dropped a little bit at the thought that Alice wouldn't be coming to see me after all. A thought occurred to me, bringing with it a sudden surge of guilt. "Don't they need you at home, then?" After all, they were her real kids, and sick kids needed their mother with them. I had tried my best when one of my foster siblings would get sick, but it just wasn't good enough.

"Of course not. Carlisle is taking care of them right now, so I can be with you." As if she sensed I was about to object, she shook her head. "I know you think you can take care of yourself, but just humor me, all right?"

Fine. But only because she wanted me to, and I was feeling guilty. My stomach was not trilling with pleasure at the fact that she wanted to stay with me, it was just that the medication hadn't kicked in yet, and I was still nauseous. Yeah, that was it. It wasn't because I was actually starting to like her or anything.

"What are you watching?" She took the chair that Emmett had vacated.

"Harry Potter." All five movies were stacked up next to the DVD player. Emmett had either forgotten to take them, or he had trusted me to take care of them until he could get back here. Knowing Emmett, it was probably the latter.

"Would you like to keep watching?"

Of course I would. Anything to keep from the awkwardness of trying to figure out what to say to each other. "Yeah."

Despite my not doing anything to encourage her, she remained close, occasionally touching my arm or smoothing my hair. I let her do it, because she obviously needed someone to love at the moment. Apparently, even I would do.

Lying in bed, with Esme sitting next to me, I was suddenly overcome with an emotion that was rather unfamiliar to me. For the first time in a long time, I was jealous. Jealous that the rest of them had this woman to care about them, and most of them didn't even appreciate her. Alice did, and sometimes Rosalie, but Edward was a definite daddy's boy. Emmett seemed equally attached to both parents, but I also got the impression that he was generally too busy getting attached to Rosalie to pay them much mind.

"What's wrong?" Esme glanced over at me. "You jumped, and now you're all tense."

"I don't know." That wasn't technically a lie. I understood my reactions, but not why I was having them. But I did like the worried look in her eyes. Not because she was worried, but because it was directed at me. For once, someone cared about my well being above everyone else's. It was a feeling I could get used to.