You've found a new routine.
At night, you lay in bed. You actually don't need to sleep, and sometimes your limbs get tired but your mind doesn't. But I told you that's what people do; they 'sleep' by laying in bed somewhere around five to ten hours. You wanted to pretend you were a person too, so you started laying in the bed with your eyes closed.
I've been more insistent that those hours could be put to better use. So we've come somewhat to an agreement: you lay there, while practicing how to talk. Words are extremely useful. Conveying to someone what you want or need is really, really useful. So I teach you the most important words.
Stop. Yes. No. Why. How. Hurts. Help.
At first you have a lot of trouble with your p's and so help usually sounds something more like 'hell.' But past that you learn with surprising quickness, because you already understand their meaning and just need help with the speaking part. We move past the barest necessities and get into more words each night, mainly so that you can point to an object and say it if push comes to shove. Along with connecting prepositions like 'to, from' and pronouns like 'mine, he, she, they, we, us'...
At some point on your own, you started practicing the names of the two helpful scientists. Alphys is completely impossible for you to say right, a combination of two syllables and letters you've been struggling with. Sounds a lot more like 'owl fizz.' You're happy that Sans's name is easy enough.
I don't know why you care about their names anyway, but whatever. It could be useful, I guess.
Your talking training comes to an end when the Sans skeleton busts through the door. Acting like he's super excited to be spending another day with you (trust me, he's not). Telling you about crossword puzzles and math problems that you never get the time to actually do. Most of the time, you end up with Alphys, practicing physical strength.
Your coordination's come a long way and you no longer stagger around like a drunk. Good job. You can even dress yourself! Except tie your shoelaces; those things are the devil. You can do most things a normal person could for day to day life, but probably couldn't handle a flat-out run for more than a few seconds. Someone would catch you pretty easily if you tried.
There's no visible means of time passing here, by light or clock. But whenever the Sans skeleton enters your room, after a long night-time session of my speech practice, he tells you good morning. There's been five good morning's so far. Today is the sixth.
"good morning!" He's way too happy.
The number of days that passed is important. It's the expiration date for your life. Sans had promised your more violent captor that you'd be able to show some kind of result. Noir skeleton Gaster seems to have more weight than Sans and Alphys combined. If they don't produce desired results by tomorrow... you'll be reduced to being a lab rat, possibly forever.
Sans doesn't seem to care, because he's still grinning like an idiot. Grabbing your hand and leading you to the break room, as normal. The break room has become the designated training room, and you've picked up on that they're purposely avoiding Gaster (who never takes a break, apparently). Alphys is already reclining on one of the chairs, with a coffee mug. But she snaps to proper posture as soon as you both enter. Sans dumps a jumble puzzle and pencil onto the table, and you on the chair. You don't even look at it. You're much more interested in what he's doing.
He's at the counter, just pouring a cup of coffee. It's really nothing special. He lifts the whole pot and the liquid pours out perfectly, not even a single drop spilling, then grabs the whole mug instead of its handle, despite the visible steam rising from the top.
You want it too. You've started to do a few things without prompting now, perhaps the vague outline of an artificial personality. So you move to the counter, the coffee pot still halfway full. Alphys watches you like a hawk; she always does whenever you act on your own. Sans hasn't even noticed, already moved onto the fridge by the time you get your little hands on the pot.
You mimic Sans's pouring into an empty cup with surprising accuracy, even keeping one hand on the top to prevent it from spilling. It's not quite as fluid as his practiced motion, because a little coffee dribbles down the spout when you lift it back up. But hey, it's better than the whole pot spilling everywhere, so it's probably impressive.
Then you make the mistake of grabbing the whole cup with your hand, because that's what you saw him do. You barely take two steps before the whole thing burns your hand, and you let go instinctively. The whole thing clatters to the ground, coffee spilling everywhere.
Alphys is at your side practically at the same time it happens. "H-hey, don't worry about it, y-you can have m-mine, okay?" She pulls you back to the chair, your eyes still riveted to the pooling coffee on the ground. Helpfully she places her own mug in front of you, before grabbing a wad of paper towels to clean up your mess.
Sans claps a bottle of ketchup to the table, taking a seat next to you – the only reason he ever raids the refrigerator. Still grinning like an idiot, like nothing happened at all, he uncaps the condiment and pours it into his coffee. Gross.
"H-hey! You could help me, you know," Alphys frowns, pausing momentarily from throwing paper towels.
You stand, prepared to help her.
Sans pulls you back down by the end of your shirt. "naw, she was talking to me. 'sides, you shouldn't be doing whatever someone asks, anyway. learn to make your own decisions, yeah?" He kicks back his feet on the table, taking a long sip of his ketchup coffee. "like right now, I don't really feel like doing anything, so i'm not."
"Oh my god. Sans." Alphys manages to muster a glare.
You think about what you want.
You pick up the ketchup bottle, and tilt it into your drink. Gross.
"OH MY GOD. SANS." Her glare melts into horror at your actions. Sans is possibly amused. "What are you teaching it?"
A frown momentarily flickers onto your face. Alphys always calls you 'it.'
"ketchup makes everything better." He pushes the bottle towards you. "here, keep it."
You pick it up, but you're still frowning. Sans will sometimes call you 'they', but can also be 'it', seemingly without a pattern. You don't like that.
"i'm teaching it how to be a person."
Something inside you feels like it's going to break.
If it bothers you that much, you should tell them.
"...not it." You mumble, barely audible.
They both freeze. Staring at you. You've never talked with them, not ever. The only answer you ever gave was your name, when Sans had asked. Seconds tick by.
"huh?" Sans finally breaks the silence, grin a bit strained.
They probably didn't even hear you. You need to be louder.
"...not 'it!'" You repeat, just a decibel loud enough to be heard.
"ok, sorry buddy, you're right," Sans has recovered quickly. Alphys still has her mouth open. "so, what should we call you then? he? she?"
...His eyes are way too sharp on that question. Like for once, he's not being an idiot. He knows that's a trick question.
Because what I was, and what you are... they aren't the same.
So whichever you answer... he'll know which one of us is in here. So you can't. You can't say he or she. So instead, you have to say...
"...Us."
Ugh, no. They look confused. That's not what they should call us, that's what we call us. You shake your head.
"They," you correct.
"they..." Sans look at you intently, as if he can see through your soul. It's like the time when he asked for your name. "like... multiple people?"
...When did this idiot become so smart?
"M-maybe they don't want to be construed to a single gender, Sans!" Alphys practically shouts, waving her hands frantically with paper towels.
The tense moment is broken. Sans leans back and sighs; your gaze already elsewhere. For all her bluster, Alphys has a point, too. It's complicated. This way is best.
"i gotta go work on my time machine a bit today, so might as well get it over with now," Sans sighs, rising. "i'll be back in a bit."
The two of you are left alone. Alphys smiles patiently at you. "You've come a long way. The rest is like, in your mind, I think? Take today off and do what you want. You deserve it."
Do what you want...
You stare blankly at her.
Slowly you take your coffee, this time using the handle instead of the mug. You don't want it for yourself, but you know there is a mouse hole in the corner of the room. Perhaps the mouse would like a ketchup-infused coffee? It's not like you ever intended to drink the thing anyway. So you leave it by the hole. Then crouch, waiting for the mouse to come out and take your peace offering.
Alphys's phone chirps. She fumbles with it, squinting at the line of text. "Oh, uh... sorry, I've got to run an errand real quick for the doctor."
Her smile becomes a bit more nervous. Taking out a blanket from a locker, she drapes it around your shoulders. Even though you're not cold. You're not quite sure what the point is, but it's supposed to be a nice gesture, you guess?
She's biting her lip. "Um, be back soon. Don't get into trouble!"
The door closes and she's gone. The coffee spill still hasn't been cleaned properly, and just has a bunch of paper towels thrown on top of it.
You're left to your own devices. What a rare opportunity. You feel... something. Like today will be different. You're determined to make it so.
Notes:
The quota for happy chapters in this story has been filled. Seriously there's nothing left.