Ahahaha, this chapter took quite a lot of time but at least it's long enough (and I hope it's also good). Reading your reviews, I laughed my ass off! It was so fun to see you despairing and being curious about what was going to happen. Love you so much :D

Did you guys read the last chapter of Ansatsu kyoushitsu? I can't believe it's ending T.T Since some of you surely haven't, I won't spoil anything. But damn, KARMA! *Blushing so hard* and *wheezing*

Just btw, I got myself a tumblr (am I weird?) and tried drawing a scene from this fanfic. So if you want to, you can have a look (how embarrassing!). The name is same as here.

Everyone, please go on and dive into the 28th chapter!

Karma's P.O.V.

"So? What will it be today?" I asked with a grin as my two best friends approached me.

Nakamura poked my cheek, muttering something about my being an ass. But not even once had her face become annoyed or serious - it was of pure amusement.

"Actually Karma-kun, seeing your mortified face after yesterday's karaoke, we think it's better for you to decide. Where do you want to go?" Nagisa-kun seemed a little sheepish while scratching the side of his head.

That was so considerate of them. Indeed, the fun from the day before left me traumatized for the rest of my life, but I was glad just for the fact that they made the effort. So there was no reason for me to be 'picky'.

People never know what they have until they lose it.

I didn't want to loose them.

"It's okay, whatever is fine," was my answer. I wasn't even aware of it but my gaze slowly slipped from my friends down to my desk and I spaced out.

It was so unreal. The very thought of such happiness. Could it be like this forever? Us laughing, joking and hanging out together without any worries. Me and Nakamura forcing Nagisa-kun into dresses, me and Nagisa-kun watching films together, our whole class enjoying our time killing Koro-sensei. They screamed yes. Their expression, eyes, gestures told me that all of this already became reality.

And yet I had a bad feeling. Too beautiful to be true. Too hopeful for someone as hopeless as me. I was happy, so very happy. But deep inside, I was scared. Scared that if, no, when this all shatters, I won't be able to go back. That at the time, I will give up for real. And there will be no one to save me.

A slight shake brought me back to the present. The two of them hovered over me, radiating concern and repeatedly calling my name. Seeing that I was down to earth again, they left out a sight.

"Is something wrong?" Nakamura was the first one to speak up.

For some reason, I had to force out a smile because there was something grim inside my chess. It was a little hard to breath.

"No, sorry. What did you guys say?"

None of them seemed satisfied with my reply. Were my manipulating and acting skills getting rusty? Not good (or?). Either way, I just couldn't kill the mood like this. There was no chance I was letting my thoughts and stupid feelings spoil their enthusiasm and effort. As if someone could be so selfish when the others did their best. No, I didn't matter. They did.

Was that wrong?

No. Of course it wasn't.

They were more important.

More than anything else. Much more then me.

"You don't look good. Are you still sick?" Nagisa-kun put a the back of his hand on my forehead but I smiled, this time a lot more trustworthly, and straightened up. He withdrew it.

"I'm seriously fine, sorry for worrying you. I just thought how lucky I am to have you guys." And with that, their lips formed into a gentle smile.

It was getting really hard to breath.

"C'mon, I am so bored after school. Where do we go? And don't say that whatever of yours!" The blond whinned and punched the desk to emphasize her point. Both of them watched me in anticipation. A sweatdrop ran down my temple. I had a certain place I wanted to be at but they wouldn't like it.

"Well?" Ah, what else was I supposed to do with their stare burning me?

"The forest," I started out. "I just want to lounge around in this forest,"

I kind of expected them to look troubled. It was the forest where I had disappeared into when trying to jump off the cliff after all. It was the forest that had hid me for so long. They knew it. But they didn't know that this was also the only place where I found peace. No idea why. It's just that every time I felt shitty and heavy, I just wandered off into it and then collapsed somewhere on the ground or climbed up a tree and spaced out. Fresh air. The sound of living beings - birds, squirrels, the colour of nature. It dulled my pain.

"Alright," the blue haired boy smiled though, taking my hand and gently pulling me up. Nakamura's expression was no sunshine but she nodded in agreement and followed us.

I went ahead this time, but that does in no way mean I knew where we were going. Just... going. Walking, step after a step, taking in the green and getting lulled by it.

My head was spinning.

"Woah!" Both Nakamura and Nagisa-kun caught me as I slightly slipped forward.

Internally cursing myself for almost giving in to the old bad habbit of breaking down whenever entering this forest, I turned at them with an embarrassed giggle: "I guess saying that I merely lost my footing isn't the most assuring thing to do, is it?"

"You think?"

"Are you really fine?"

Aside from the difficulty breathing and my being lighheaded, yeah, I was fine. But all of this was just the side effect of my uncomprehendable inkling that something bad was going to happen. It was impossible to figure out what though. Anyway, nothing serious.

"I just need a break, that's all." This wasn't a lie.

Wait. When did I start with the lies again?

Didn't I promise to be honest? To stop hurting them? Or was I that incompetent to be unable to protect those who I held dear from my own self?

Cold.

In the end, I wasn't able to do much except for lying motionless for two hours and doing my best to win the fight with... myself. Yeah, I was being ridiculous. I didn't understand it at all. What was happening.

Nagisa-kun and Nakamura just sat there without saying a word, letting me cool down. To be frank, it wasn't very calming, but just having on mind that they stayed, that they accepted this broken, it helped.

That day, eight o'clock

The very second I stood in front of my house, I knew something was wrong. The doors were not locked.

That strange, heavy feeling from today returned. As for the explanation of it - I couldn't think of any.

I didn't even have to. All to do was step inside and for the first time in three years see the lights turned on.

And it hit me. Today was tuesday. Twenty seventh of october. The day she returned.

It made sense now - all of it. I learned to suppress things that were killing me. I learned to forget things I didn't want to remember. I wanted to forget that the bitch was going to be here again. How could I even let myself believe that I was going to be happy? That everything would become better? There have always been buts. And this one - though unconsciously - I wished to reject.

"Oh? Lookie who is back~" Her light, slow steps pierced through the silence. I couldn't even move from the spot.

"Did you miss me?" The bitch now stood before me, her face as arrogant as ever.

She didn't change much. Her hair was still to the waist, nails long and painted, eyes sadistic you could see brutal bloodlust in them. The only difference now is that our height was the same.

I didn't answer, instead I maintained a blank face and stood there despite the fact my legs wanted to give up.

"Oh, you grew up so much? You are very handsome to that," She ran a finger from the side of my cheek down the throat. The sensation could be compared to a knife slicing through my skin. And it wasn't that far from truth, I felt small blood drops streaming down from the injured place, slightly staining the white shirt.

As if the sting from her nails wasn't enough, I bit my tongue to force out: "Get out of the way, old hag." I hated her. And now that I got a little better thanks to my friends, I just had to say it. For the sake of saying it.

Her brows rised, face in obvious surprise and displeasure.

"Impudent, aren't we?" She dig those sharp things into the back of my neck, now holding it in a clutch and not letting me even move. "Are you actually still being stubburn?"

My cold gaze still didn't fade. It was the only barrier left between the two of us.

"But you know, no matter how much you try, your existence will just never mean anything."

"Shut up,"

"Abandoned by everyone. Hated by everyone. You are nothing but a burden."

"You're wrong."

"Am I? Or are you just lying to yourself again?"

Lying. Was I lying? It was hard to say. Truthfully, the number of lies I have uttered is much bigger than the one of truths. Growing up fake and building a facade, it got harder and harder to tell apart the genuinity and the deception of my words. Even the expressions were getting muddled. Talktive, outgoing, brave, cheeky - that's the character I created, hoping that somewhere along the lines it would become the real me.

If I was smiling - that means I had to be happy. If I was crying - sad. But in the end, everything got so messed up. And now, in my case, smiles meant the same as the tears. Nothing.

"You see? You are just trying to force yourself into believing in the good. Look carefully. Wake up. In this world, no such thing exists." She was suddenly whispering to my ear.

Feeling her so close, I shivered and jerked my body, getting my nape scratched by her unwillingly letting go. And yet, the woman didn't look bothered.

"Oh, you are so pale I'm worried. Let me paint some colour into that beautiful face of yours." She licked her lips with a malicious grin, grabbing my wrist

And as she pulled me into the kitchen, her voice turned into a sweet threath.

"Red really suits you."

Nagisa's P.O.V.

The next day, Karma-kun didn't come to school.