Chapter 15 : A Possible Past, A Haunting Future and Enjoying The Now

"So what do you want to talk about then?" She asked, before a silence loomed. Kazuma sat on her bed. He'd turned the light off when he entered. Her window was open. It was one of those summer nights where the window could stay open and only a warm breeze would enter the room. She noticed how his mind seemed elsewhere.

She'd never noticed Kazuma to be so embedded in his thoughts. She'd known he probably had a lot on his mind, so she didn't want to strap him down with more talk about his past…or fighting…or anything like that. But could you really force yourself to just live, like she had advised? Or were they already too embedded in this all to really escape from it?

"Do you ever think about what it would have been like if we were born to an average family?" He said rather nonchalantly, lying back on her bed.

She was surprised he'd thought of this too. "I have. Actually right before we left for our last job a week back, I thought about that. I guess it was because summer had just started and we were already going to be busy again. But then again… without us, all the people we've saved and the demon's we've stopped might still be out there. I mean I'd hate to think Ms. Oksana would be still dealing with all those evil crows and floods…or that Mizuko would still be half demon and angry…"

"It's a double edged sword for us isn't it? We fight for others because they depend on us, because we know what's out there. Even if we wanted to walk away we couldn't, because we know too well what lurks behind some of the darkest corners."

"Hey! I thought you wanted more in-between moments, of relaxing and just living? Not this worrying crap!" Ayano crossed her arms.

Kazuma's mouth twisted into a subdued smile. It was accusatory, but at least she was looking out for him. "Looking out for me this time?"

"Well it doesn't always have to be the other way around…so…yeah…" Her words stuttered out, as his gaze made her blush a bit.

"Then come here and enjoy it with me."

He pulled on her shirt, dragging her down onto the bed with him.

"What are you doing?" She said as she hit the bed with a small bounce. "I hope you know-"

"Shh. Just accept it as it is." He said as he stretched a bit before wrapping her in an embrace. He smelled the faint smell of her shampoo in her hair as it fell in front of him.

Ayano noticed for the second time now how warm Kazuma could be. And she wasn't just talking about his body. Normally they did have a tendency to be cat and dog-like in their relationship, even when they cared. But now, he didn't seem so rough, or even flirtatious. He was actually like a warm blanket right now, pulling her close. She kind of felt like he'd needed this kind of interaction more than she did. It was a softer side of him. One she didn't mind at all.

She woke up to the feeling of the bed moving.

She opened her eyes. It was darker than before. She noticed Kazuma standing by the bed, taking his shirt off."

"What are you doing?" She asked wondering why he was removing layers.

"I was hot. I don't really sleep with a shirt on normally, and sometimes nothing at-"

"Okay, okay, I got it." She said and sat up.

"I didn't intend to fall asleep so easily." He admitted.

"Me either." She shook her head.

"So tell me, what are you going to do after your next semester ends?"

"Huh?"

"Well your friends probably will go off to university right? I mean they seem to already have university boyfriends."

"I'm not sure." Ayano hadn't had much of a chance to think about it. "I never really considered going much. I guess I just always assumed I'd be too busy working on getting stronger to support our family as the leader."

"Then I guess we'll be spending more time together. "

"Yea Jugo will have us training really hard once I'm completely done with school."

"I'm really surprised by his actions. I mean I get he didn't hide all the sheets this time…but that protective father act really hasn't come out in him yet has it?" Kazuma looked at the door.

"Wait, what? My father is the one who stole the sheets too? Does my father even care about my innocence? Am I just some prostitute of a daughter to push into the laps of-"

"Hey, watch your words, you fell into my lap you know." Kazuma laughed a bit. He sat on the bed again.

Ayano recalled that she actually had on the train ride to the Lake Town. Still her father wasn't very typical in his protective fatherly tendencies…or lack of for that matter.

"Still, I can't trust anyone in this house with all this…this stuff going on."

"What about Ren? He's pretty innocent."

"Didn't you say Ren knew about my father's doings?"

"Well ya, but I'm not sure he totally understands it all."

"I stand by what I said: nobody."

"Well you can trust me can't you?"

"For certain things, yes." She admitted as truthfully as possible, turning away, not wanting to face him. .

"Not others?" His brow rose as he gave a slight smirk.

"Not with your track record of-"

"What? Doing this?" He breathed on her neck from behind her and bit her ear lobe lightly.

"Hey-!" She tried to persist, but noticed her own voice came out less persistent sounding and a bit raspier than she had intended. She couldn't help but admit to herself that although he put her on the spot, she liked Kazuma's touch.

"I'm selfish Ayano. For that you're right not to completely trust me." He wrapped his arms around her shoulders continuing to kiss down her neck.

"Well-just-don't rob me—but-I-trust-you—wouldn't do anything—to hurt me—" She mustered out her words in paused breaths. She wasn't even sure what she said made sense.

"I can't really… make those kinds of promises. I'd never intend to purposefully." He said hesitantly.

"I don't want you to promise then. I want you try as hard as you can. Don't ever promise something that's too difficult to keep one hundred percent…because I don't what you to suffer if you break it. I know the kind of stuff we do it's complicated, so coming out without any cuts or bruises isn't possible." She looked at him and noticed how serious it had gotten. Her words hit home with him. She looked away a bit bashfully, breaking off their connection. "Shit happens you know…"

His eyes went from wide and serious into a smiling glance. "I know it well. But there is one thing I'm starting to realize I can completely promise."

"What?"

"I love you Ayano." He urged a kiss onto her lips not letting her respond, causing her to fall back onto the bed, his body pressed over hers.

She melted into his chest. She took her hand and held his cheek, as she accepted the kiss.

His hand this time slipped under her shirt. Never would she have imagined letting Kazuma do this, but right now she felt like jello, or hot jello…or something. Too in a daze to stop him, her body not in control of her feelings.

She felt his warm hands. The cool breeze of the night now lightly coming through the window.

He didn't want to lift his lips from hers. These moments; it had been a long time since he'd done this with anyone else…but that anyone else didn't matter. Ayano had been right, he needed to just live. And living for him meant being next to her for now; as partners, and now as something more. He paused for a second and got a glimpse of her, her eyes not staring at him, but caught in the heat of the moment. Her red hair over her button up pajamas, spilling onto the bed.

Ayano was born to be the princess of fire. If that was the case, just as she had supported him and his struggle, he'd stand by her side through all the troubles of taking over the family.

Her moans started to drive him wild. He had been right; she shouldn't trust his restraint.

"Kazuma…" She said, catching his glance, her amber eyes half-lidded, noticing his pause.

"Told you I was selfish." He came back down breathing in her ear. She raised her chest at the sensation, hitting up against his. His hand moved down between her legs, her buttons on her shirt coming undone.

His digits entered her, and her hips bucked up. He moved faster.

"Kaa-zum—ahh…" She said, almost warningly.

"Should I stop?" He said raising a brow.

"No…I mean-" She caught herself and blushed, looking away. He grinned and kissed down her neck again continuing faster. He couldn't go on much longer.

She felt her hips buck again involuntarily, and felt something against her leg.

"Ayano…" She heard Kazuma moan out. She bit her lip. His hand moved into her hair, she put her arms around his neck.

Their hands moved at once, removing another layer of clothing.

"Are you-"

She nodded.

Prepared, he entered her in a swift motion. She noticed it hurt less than the last. He moved slowly bucking his hips into hers. Her hand slipped a bit from his neck.

He did it again. She moaned.

"I'm going to go-in-farther." He choked out.

She felt it. Her body loosened and tightened. He was farther in her than before. It felt better than before.

"Kaz—!"

"Shh. Otherwise Jugo might finally throw me out too." He said covering her mouth with another kiss. He grinded into her again.

She moaned beneath his lips and grinded back. Deep within her was a feeling that begged for release. He never got this deep before. She'd never felt so much like a part of anyone else.

"I- cant-hold on…" He said. He quickened his pace.

She lost it. She could feel it rising, suddenly she felt herself melting into his body, at one with him. "I love you Kazuma!" She exclaimed, as muffled to be quiet, as she could in her state, without the mind to even care about her outburst, as she came.

He followed and kissed her forehead.

She breathed out. Suddenly the summer air wasn't enough to cool her room down.

"You know what this means Ayano…" Kazuma said falling beside her on the bed.

"What?"

"I can't help but think…this is going to make you a target."

"Wait, what do you mean a target? I'm not helpless-"

"No. I mean Bernhardt."

"Well he hasn't returned yet so…"

"No, I can't help but shake it. I know I wasn't supposed to think of this but…he killed Tsui Ling because I interfered. We interfered again with his plan and this time, I don't … I mean I think I've gotten over her. Even if Lapis hates me… there's nothing I can do now to convince her I wouldn't have changed things if I could. The past is the past…moving on with you, I've made a decision to live in the now. That means he's going to want to tear down this now…" He sat up and rested his head on his hand, his elbow on his knee.

"We'll deal with that when the time comes. He's not going to get away with it next time. Plus, it's not now anyway…" She said stretching. She knew she couldn't just outright pretend it wasn't an issue for the sake of enjoying life's moments or whatever, but still, every relationship Kazuma was in shouldn't haunt him.

"You're right." He said, and turned to her, but she was already a sleep. He smirked to himself. Ayano was right. These little moments mattered, even if something happened in the future, he'd need to remember these, just as she would if anything happened to him.