I've spent so many nights wonderin' when will it end
When will the day come when happiness begins
I'm running the race but it seems too hard to win
I'm sick of mourning my stomach is throwing up in the morning

I'm calling for help and watching it melt away
My heart's been put on display and put away
In many ways, many times I told myself it was ok
And anger was the price that was paid
While these faded dreams just screamed to bring them home

The burden was too heavy I kept running from the throne
I can't take it any longer
I can taste my spirit hunger
God please help me get home

Lord though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I'm not scared cause You're holding my breath
I only fear that I don't have enough time left
To tell the world that there's no time left, Lord please

I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER

Beth's POV

Something had called me into the space beyond and I found myself wandering in the woods by the light of a full moon, trailing through trees and over fallen logs. I moved silently, careful of my footing that I didn't break any twigs or bring attention to myself. I didn't know why I did this, but there was a sense of trepidation and the need to be hidden as I moved.

"She's been found," sounded a voice in the darkness and I froze, every cell in my body fighting not to flee as soon as I heard him.

"Are you sure?" Castiel asked and I started to breathe again, thinking it would be all right, I trusted Cas not to harm me.

"Yes," was the answer and I frowned, thinking I knew that voice. Inching forward I reached a row of low bushes and crouched behind them, peering out into a clearing beyond. Castiel was standing in the centre with his cream coloured trench coat stark against the dark background. His companion was less noticeable. His black skin was almost as dark as his suit, and he seemed to float in the shadows, as if only a part of this reality. Uriel.

Biting my lip I considered my options, should I expose myself and reveal my position? Surely I was here at Cas's request, I rarely met with him on the dream plane without him initiating it. Yet, I hadn't run into Uriel in a month since he'd threatened Sam, and I didn't particularly want to speak with him now.

I made to stand up when a hand clamped down on my shoulder, holding me in place. I struggled and another hand covered my mouth, lips pressing to my ear.

"Shhhhh," my captor whispered and I forced myself to relax a little.

"Are you calm?" He asked, waiting for me to nod before releasing his hold on my mouth. I turned in the dark to see deep blue eyes, so dark they were almost black looking back at me from under a mess of spiky black hair. I raised my eyebrow at the visage of Ezekiel as he winked, and then nodded at them, placing a finger over his lips in a gesture to stay silent.

"There are demons going after her now," Uriel stated as I listened in on the conversation.

"We must get to her first," Cas said and I frowned, he seemed upset, as much as he could be given that angels didn't really show emotion.

"Set your dogs on her," Uriel said with a sneer. "They seem to like coming to your beck and call."

"Don't talk about the Winchesters that way, you know better," Cas said.

"I know nothing of the sort," Uriel said. "I am not convinced, as the rest of you are, as to the need to keep them alive."

"Well that's not your decision to make, Uriel." Cas pointed out and I was glad he was on our side with this one.

"No, it's not, or they'd already be dead," Uriel said with a smirk.

Cas regarded him with the same stoic facial expression he usually had. Regardless of whether he was happy, angry, sad, worried or anything else he appeared apathetic to the world in general.

"I will send someone to be certain," Cas said and Uriel nodded.

"Keep me posted."

With a nod from Cas they both disappeared and I stood up with a frown.

"What was that all about?" I asked, turning to Ezekiel.

"Much is happening in Heaven right now, too much. You remember how I thought there were spies within the angel garrison when the Temple was attacked?" He looked at me intently, speaking softly, almost a whisper.

"Yes."

"There are rumours that demons have been possessing angel vessels and using their connection to the angels to listen in on battle plans," Ezekiel said and I started to feel sick to my stomach.

"Can they do that?"

"Yes, it's not perfect, and as soon as the angelic line becomes aware of the link it can be severed so that they can't eavesdrop. Then there's the trouble of them finding a vessel. Not everyone carries a vessel bloodline. It's easy for us to find compatible matches because we are linked – a demon would have to chance upon it, not an easy feat." Ezekiel was stroking his chin with his hand as he spoke, looking at but also through me, as if recalling a memory long past.

"So who are they looking for?" I asked. "Another vessel?"

"Oh no, someone much more important," Ezekiel said with a grin, not elaborating.

"And what does this have to do with me?" I asked, crossing my arms and giving him the once-over. "Why am I here?"

"I called you," Ezekiel answered and I frowned, he'd never done that before – usually it was only Cas. "I knew once the call was activated you would gravitate naturally toward Castiel because you've been seeing him more, and I just came along for the ride."

"You wanted to spy on him?" I asked.

Ezekiel nodded, his dark locks falling across his forehead as he reached out impatiently to brush them away. "He got called away from the garrison and I wasn't told why. Now is not the time to have one of my best soldiers pulled from the line, I wanted to know why."

"And did you get your answer?"

"Partly. You're going to have to go back Beth, and keep your ear to the ground. They're looking for a girl who has recently awakened to her true nature. Castiel may come to you with information, listen to him, and if things get really rough, call me." Ezekiel said, and before I could argue he placed two fingers to my forehead and I felt my stomach lurch and my vision go black.

I gasped as I sat up in bed, clutching at my stomach and wanting to dry heave. I sat panting in the middle of the mattress, hands buried in the covers which were hiked up around me. I was hot and sticky, and when the cool air hit my mostly exposed skin, it sent shivers across my body. My shorts and tank top were both drenched in sweat from whatever reaction I'd been having to the dream.

Looking around the room I noticed that I was alone. Frowning, I reached for my phone and hit speed dial for Dean. Putting the phone to my ear, I checked out the dark motel room, it didn't appear like he'd left a note.

The sounds of a crowded bar echoed in the background as Dean answered the phone.

"Hey baby," he said with a smile in his voice. "You just wake up?"

"Yeah, why did you leave me?" I cringed as the words seemed more like the whiney sounds of a little girl who had just been abandoned by her father than a wife checking in with her husband.

"Awww, you were so tired, I didn't want to wake you but we were going stir crazy and had to get out." I smiled at the concern in his voice.

"Believe me, I'd much rather have you here," he added with a tone that made my heart skip a beat.

"Where are you guys?"

"Just down on the corner at The Pig's Belly playing some pool and having a few drinks. Why don't you come join us?"

"Okay, I just need to shower first," I said, wanting to wash away the after effects of the dream from my skin.

"Mmmm, maybe I should come back and join you," Dean suggested and I laughed at his ever incorrigible nature.

"That would be nice," I said with a smile. "But I won't be long; you can show me how much you missed me when I get there."

"Don't be long," Dean said with a moan and I grinned, hanging up the phone. I climbed out of bed, stripping my clothes off and heading for the shower. Turning my thoughts toward Ezekiel and the strange conversation we'd overheard Cas and Uriel having, I wondered what was going on in Heaven to warrant all this attention on one girl.

The Pig's Belly

Dean's POV

Beth hung up on me with a chuckle and I smiled, it was always good to hear her laugh, and that had been happening a lot more lately. I was relieved.

My thoughts turned to Beth alone in the shower, soaping up and standing under that hot… pulsing… massaging water, and I felt my body instantly react. I forced myself to think about other things before I got an embarrassing erection in the middle of the bar. Turning around I waved over the bartender and placed my order for a beer and a couple shots of tequila to start with.

Leaning back, I surveyed the room and watched as Sam continued to con a guy out of his money. He was pretty convincing with the drunk routine, kind of made me wonder what else he'd said or done while I'd been in Hell. Downing my second tequila, I picked up my beer and wandered a little closer to the pool table. Sam was speaking to the guy he was playing.

"Brian, come on man, just one more. Just – just give me a chance to win it back." Sam was leaning heavily on the pool table, using it for balance.

Brian was a tall, tough looking guy with broad shoulders and a shaved head. He looked like he could hold his own in a fight, but I wasn't too worried about that, so could I. There was also the ace up my sleeve: Sam wasn't really drunk, and could more than hold his own. Not that Brian knew that.

"It's your cash," Brian said with a shrug, smirking at how easy he thought this game was going to be. That was my cue: I walked up to the pool table, putting a worried frown on my face. This was a lot more fun when it was Beth playing the worried wife over me, but playing sober big brother was amusing too.

"Excuse me," I said, stepping up to the pool table. "My brother's a little sauced to be making bets."

"He insisted," Brian said, looking over at me as he racked the balls.

"Yeah, but you've already taken, what, two bills off him?" I asked sceptically. "I'm just saying."

"Hey, shut up Dean. I'm fine!" Sam said forcefully.

"No, you're not fine. You're drunk!"

Sam ignored my comment and looked at Brian. "Let's make it five hundred." He pulled a roll of money out of his pocket and waved it around in the air.

"Five hundred?!" I spluttered.

"Sure," Brian agreed, you couldn't have wiped the smile off his face if you tried – of course, that was about to change. Sam put the money down on the edge of the table.

"Five hundred. Your break." Brian said to Sam.

I looked up at Sam as Brian finished setting up the balls and he raised his eyebrow at me. This was too easy; the guy had fallen for the act, hook line and sinker. Sam lined up his shot and sent the ball spinning down the table, scattering the balls across the green and pocketing at least three balls at once.

I glanced over at Brian who was staring at the table with a frown. He looked up at me and I could see it instantly in his eyes, he knew he'd been hustled, now was going to be the test as to how much of a man….

"Keep the money," Sam said, interrupting my thoughts and laying his cue down on the table.

"Keep the money?" I exclaimed. "What…" I found myself on the back foot this time, struggling to keep up with the new act. Sam walked past me like a man on a mission and I turned to see what had caught his attention, cursing under my breath at the sight of the brunette sitting at the bar. Ruby.

I stalked after Sam, who had reached her and was making nice talk.

"Well, you got a lot of nerve showing up anywhere near me," I said in an angry tone and she rolled her eyes at me.

"I just have some info, and then I'm gone," she said.

"What is it?" Sam asked, leaning in to her and watching her intently. I narrowed my eyes, starting to wonder just how close they'd gotten while I'd been in Hell. Beth had told me she'd walked in on them having sex, but had it been more than once? Was it more than just sex?

"I'm hearing a few whispers," Ruby answered, her dark eyes peering up at Sam.

"Oooh, great, demon whispers – that's reliable," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes.

"Girl named Anna Milton escaped from a locked ward yesterday. The demons seem pretty keen on finding her. Apparently, some real heavy hitters turned out for the Easter-egg hunt," Ruby continued.

I felt a hand touch the small of my back and turned, smiling as Beth slipped her arm around my waist, looking at Ruby warily as she joined us.

"Why? Who is she?" Sam asked.

"No idea," Ruby said, her eyes flicking to Beth in silent acknowledgement that she'd just joined us. "But I'm thinking that she's important, 'cause the order is to capture her alive. I just figured that whatever the deal is, you might want to find this girl before the demons do."

Sam glanced over at us, all serious. "Look, maybe we should check it out."

"Actually," I said, keeping one arm wrapped around Beth and lifting my glass of beer to my lips nonchalantly. "We're working a case, but thanks."

"What case?" Ruby scoffed.

"Uh, we've got leads, big leads," I countered.

"Sounds dangerous," she smirked, playing along.

"Yeah, well, it sure ain't goose-chasing after some chick who, for all we know, doesn't even exist, just because you say she's important." I pointed out, ignoring the daggers Sam was throwing me with his eyes. Oh it was on, he and I needed to have a little chat about his new best friend sometime, set him straight about some of the things she'd done to this family.

"I'm just delivering the news," Ruby said. "You can do whatever you want with it. Fas as I'm concerned, I told you, I'm done." She stood as if to leave and then I almost staggered when Beth spoke.

"Wait, Ruby. This hospital Anna escaped from… it got a name?" Her voice was low and her arm tightened around my waist. Something was up, something I'd obviously missed. Ruby smirked at me, and then turned to Beth with a nod.

Impala

Beth's POV

Dean was stewing on something as he drove, staring out the windshield with a scowl on his face. Sam was sitting in the back seat talking on the phone to the police. I closed my eyes for a moment, listening to the rain patter on the windshield, wishing that I could instead be tucked up in bed with my husband. It had been a long time since we'd just enjoyed that space together, and I found myself thinking about the three day stay at a little bed and breakfast so many years ago. We'd just lost the baby, and found ourselves stranded after a hunt due to a storm. We'd rediscovered each other that week, tucked away from the rest of the world, staying warm under covers as we made incredibly sweet and slow love.

"Can I get a copy of the missing persons report?" Sam asked, jolting me out of my thoughts. "Great. Okay."

I slid across the seat to sit closer to Dean, my thigh pressed up against his. We'd left right away at my urging but he didn't seem convinced it was the right move.

"Penny for your thoughts?" I asked and he turned conflicted eyes to me, confirming that something was definitely bothering him.

"Thanks," Sam said, hanging up the phone and drawing my attention before Dean could speak. "Well, Anna Milton's definitely real," he said to us.

"Don't mean the case is real. And this hospital's a three-day drive," Dean countered. I squeezed his thigh softly and looked at him.

"Since when do you complain about a drive?" I asked with a grin, and he shook his head.

"We've driven further for less, Dean," Sam pointed out. Dean shook his head again, clearly bothered. "Look, you got something to say, say it."

"Oh, I'm saying it – this sucks," Dean spat out and I was a little surprised at the venom behind it. Sam let out an angry short breath which was audible even from the back seat.

"You're not pissed we're going after the girl. You're pissed Ruby threw us the tip," Sam said, leaning forward as I turned to sit sideways on the seat so I could see them both.

"Right," Dean said with a nod. "Because as far as you're concerned, the Hell-bitch is practically family. Yeah, boy, something major must've happened while I was downstairs, 'cause I come back and… and you're BFF with a demon and ignoring your own sister?"

"I told you, Dean, she helped me go after Lilith," Sam said, conveniently ignoring the part about how he'd dumped my ass as soon as she'd happened along.

"Well, thanks for the thumbnail – real vivid," Dean said with a roll of his eyes. "You want to fill in a little detail?"

"Sure, Dean, let's trade stories. You first. How was Hell? Don't spare the details," Sam retorted and I felt Dean's thigh tense just at the thought of it.

"Guys… come on, this isn't helping things," I soothed and Dean sighed, shaking his head again while Sam sat back in his seat.

"Well, you know what isn't helping? You siding with the demon bitch on this one," Dean said to me with a low tone, looking at me with what appeared to be worry in his eyes.

"I'm not," I said. "I'd be as wary as you if it weren't for outside factors," I said.

"Yeah, about that…"

I held up my hand, staving off the lecture. "Okay, okay, it's story time, I get it. There's not much to it, but something is going on. I was asleep, and I found myself in the woods – the same one I usually end up in when Cas and I talk, you know, when I'm dreaming." Dean nodded, glancing over at me.

"So I hear people talking and I sneak up on them because I'm feeling nervous for some reason. I'm hiding behind these bushes and I see Cas and Uriel. Uriel is going on about some girl that has been located, and how the demons are after her and they need to get to her first."

I paused for breath, looking at both the boys, realising I had their undivided attention. "While I was listening in on this, Ezekiel snuck up behind me."

"Ezekiel?" Dean asked, and I nodded. "The same Ezekiel who possessed you and kidnapped you?"

"It wasn't like that Dean, and you know it," I said with a sigh, but his eyes were showing the hurt and worry just hearing the angel's name brought up in him. He was still dealing with the guilt over having beaten me almost to death months ago when in the throes of a hallucination.

"Dean," I said softly. "Ezekiel would never hurt me."

"Yeah, right," he scoffed. "You said that about me once too."

I bit my lip and leaned over to touch his face, turning him to look at me for a moment. He kept one eye on the road, but glanced my way with a sigh.

"And you never would," I said. "That wasn't your fault." Dean sighed, knowing better than to argue this with me.

"He took your body into a battle zone, Beth."

"With my permission," I pointed out.

"Yeah, about that…"

"Hey, guys, can we get back to the point? You've argued enough about this, what's done is done," Sam said, his voice heavy with unspoken opinion. I glanced at him, wondering whether he was referring to just our arguments when he spoke about putting the past behind us.

"Right. Well Ezekiel said he'd called me because Cas got pulled from the battalion without explanation and he used my connection to Cas to locate him and listen in on the plans they were making. He says demons have been possessing vessels when they find them. Using the vessel's connection to Heaven they can tune in and listen to the battle plans being made." I said, again pausing to look at them.

"Oh I don't like the sound of that," Dean muttered, shaking his head. "Demons always seem to have a thing for you, now I'm starting to see why."

"That's why I have the tattoo, they can't possess me ever again," I said and he nodded, turning his troubled eyes back to the road.

"Apparently it's rare, because unlike the angels, demons can't just tune in and find out who is a vessel and who isn't," I said. "Either way, the angels are after this girl too, and she's more than a vessel he said, but wouldn't elaborate any more than that. He told me to keep my ear to the ground and see if anything showed up – then I walk into the bar to find you guys, and here's Ruby sprouting on about some girl who has just escaped from a mental ward and demons are after her… it was too much of a coincidence."

"You think this Anna is the girl the angels are after?" Dean asked.

"I think there's a fair chance, yeah."

Sam's POV

With Beth's admission that Anna Milton might be the girl both angels and demons were after, Dean settled down. He wasn't real happy with the situation, but if there was one thing about my brother, he didn't often get into arguments with Beth over the next course of action. This was mainly because she so rarely put her foot down about something, so when she did he knew that he should shut up and listen.

I sat back in my seat feeling slightly vindicated that I'd gotten my way, even if it Beth had gone to bat for me. The comment about my relationship with Ruby had me smarting a little, most of the time I didn't give it any thought at all, but then there were the nights when I was feeling the need, not just to tear into something that could take the anger I had inside, but the other need, the one I wasn't supposed to be indulging.

I sighed, looking out the window at the trees rushing by. It hadn't been an easy road these last six months, getting to where we were now. Closing my eyes I started to think about just how far from Dean and Beth's innocent little brother I had come.

When Dean had died, I had done everything I could to help Beth through that time. I thought maybe we'd succeed in getting him out, hopes had been high, but as the months had dragged by I found myself sinking deeper and deeper into darkness that even Beth couldn't help me with. She was in one of her own, the pair of us holding on by mere threads to the hope that we could win.

One night I'd found myself at a crossroads when she'd gone to the chapel down the street to pray. I had gone past praying at this point, and was getting resentful that she still could. None of it was fair, how could she believe in God the merciful when he refused to lift a finger to save our brother from his torment? A torment he had only chosen to spare his loved ones from pain.

The wind picked up a little as I dug at the hard, compacted dirt. It was difficult, but sheer brute force broke the surface, and stubborn pride made me continue. I finally had enough of a hole to bury the small box with the summoning ingredients in it, and I hurriedly covered over this latest effort to save my brother.

My back was sore, and I stood slowly, looking up at the sky. The stars were sparkling brightly as the moon was hiding. I waited impatiently, taking another sip out of the bottle of whiskey I was holding. I felt the road spinning a little and threw the bottle at a nearby sign, smashing it.

"Come on! Where the Hell are you?!" I screamed into the night air. Nothing. I started to think that maybe it wasn't going to show up when I heard a male voice from behind me.

"I was wondering whether to come or not," he said and I spun to face him, locating his position over by an old abandoned gas station. "I mean, you shot one of my co-workers." He stopped leaning against a beam, and took a few steps toward me with a smirk on his face. "Don't take this the wrong way, Sam, but you don't look so hot buddy. I guess burying your brother didn't agree with you."

"Well?" I asked, refusing to bite at the brother remark and taking a few steps toward him.

"Well, let's see that special little knife of yours first," he said, and I scoffed, pulling it out of my jacket and slamming it down on an old wooden table near the gas station.

"No devil's traps, either. I'm not here to play games," I stated, staring at him.

"Well, let me guess. You want to make a deal. And 'round and 'round the Winchesters go. I'm sorry Sam. That's not gonna happen," he said. I saw red, and with a movement that was faster than anything he saw coming, I stabbed the knife through his hand, pinning him to the wood underneath. The demon cried out, and started to breathe heavily, but I had to give it to him, he didn't panic.

"I don't want ten years. I don't want one year. I don't want candy!" I snapped at him. "I want to trade places with Dean."

"No."

"Just take me!" I yelled. "It's a fair trade!"

"Does your sister know you're here?"

"What?" I asked, looking at him.

"Simple question Sam, does your sister know you are here trying to trade your soul for her husband? Man that sounds funny even saying it, you know the only thing that would make things even more delicious about that situation would be if she were your real, blood sister. Talk about racey Dean."

I punched him, twisting the knife in his hand as he yelled with pain.

"Shut up about my sister. Now give me the deal," I said.

"No!" He said firmly back at me.

"Why not?" I asked, frustration clutching at my chest. How many times did I have to do this? We'd been to four crossroads already and they all said the same, 'No deal', but why? Why was Dean so special? I looked at the demon, sighing.

"Lilith wants me dead. Just let Dean go, and she can have me."

"Don't you understand, Sam? It's not about your soul. Dean's in Hell, right where we want him. We've got everything exactly the way we want it. True, we missed out on that tasty little piece of ass you call a sister, but we got Dean to sweeten the deal. Things are as they are meant to be. You want to kill me? Go ahead. I've made peace with my Lord."

"Sam?" A voice lulled me back into the present and I turned to look at Dean who was looking in the mirror at me. Beth was curled up against his shoulder, his arm tucked around her as she slept peacefully.

"Yeah?"

"Did you hear me?" He asked with a frown.

"No, uh, sorry, I must have dozed off."

"I asked if you were okay to drive for a bit, we could use the rest," Dean said and I nodded.

"Yeah, sure man." I waited for Dean to pull over, and he opened the driver side door, slipping his arms around Beth.

"Hey baby," he said softly and she murmured into his neck. "Come on sleepyhead, time to get in the back." Beth woke up long enough to swing her legs out of the car and then Dean pulled her to her feet, manoeuvring them around the open door and into the back. He guided her across the seat and then sat near the door, taking a pillow Beth now kept in the back religiously and tucking it behind his head as he leaned into the corner.

I watched, kind of in awe of the gentle care he took with our sister, as he whispered something into her ear and she smiled, kissing him softly before lying across the back seat, her head in his lap. She closed her eyes and seemed to fall back asleep almost immediately. Dean rested his hand in her hair and I heard him sigh, almost contentedly, as I got into the driver's seat.

"You spoil her," I said with a smile, looking in the mirror at Dean who opened one eye to look at me. He chuckled and nodded, moving the pillow a little to get comfortable.

"Yeah, I know. But she's worth it," he said, closing his eyes and smiling.

"Yeah, she is," I said softly, feeling a little guilty about how badly I'd treated her while Dean was in Hell. Beth had never done anything other than try to care for me as Dean and Dad had, and I'd abused that privilege. Somehow she'd managed to forgive me, but we were far from back to normal. I'd have to work on that.

Psychiatric Ward

Beth's POV

Anna's psychologist was more than happy to show us to the room she'd been occupying before her escape. She walked ahead of us, holding her shoulders back in a slightly superior stance. Everything about her was neat and perfect: hair curled but neatly controlled, blue blazer over a white shirt with a matching blue skirt, right down to the white shoes and string of pearls at her neck.

"Of course I want to help however I can," she said as we looked around the room.

"Now, the orderly has no recollection of Anna's escape?" Sam asked as Dean and I examined the stark white room. How anyone could hope to get better in such a place was beyond me. The soul needed colour and life to be well, this wasn't living: this was a nightmare.

"Apparently she knocked him unconscious," the doctor said and I looked up, curious. That would be some act of power. "The blow caused some amnesia. He doesn't even remember coming into her room."

Dean and I exchanged a glance, he seemed as sceptical as I did on that, and the amnesia… that was classic demon black out.

"That's a hell of a right hook to knock out a guy that's got eighty pounds on her," Dean pointed out.

"We think she may have planned this, waited behind the door," said the doctor, walking out of the room into the hallway.

"You mentioned Anna's illness was recent?" I asked, following her.

"Two months ago, she was happy, well-adjusted, journalism major, lots of friends – bright future," she answered.

"So, what happened – she just… flipped?" Dean asked.

"Well, that's the tragedy of schizophrenia. Within weeks, Anna was overtaken by delusions," she said, looking at all three of us.

"What kind of delusions?" I asked, looking up from the notepad where I was writing.

"She thought demons were everywhere," the doctor answered, and she handed me a sketch book. I started to flip through the book and the first thing I noticed was the stained-glass windows she had drawn on almost every page. Some of the drawings were of steeples, a cross above the windows, it was the same window over and over.

"Interesting," Dean muttered.

"It's not uncommon for our patients to believe that monsters are real," the doctor said with a tight-lipped smile.

"Well, that – that's just batty," Dean said and I resisted the urge to elbow him. Sam looked over my shoulder as I continued to flip through the book, and I froze as I came to a dark drawing of people rising from the grave. Scrawled across the top in almost gothic lettering were the words 'Raising of the Witnesses'. I glanced at Sam who frowned, and he reached out to flip to the next page.

What came next made my blood run cold, the words 'Samhain the next seal is broken,' covered the page above a drawing of a man's face and a row of houses all with jack-o-lanterns out the front.

"That's Revelations," Dean said, paying attention to the drawings too.

"Since when does the Book of Revelations have jack-o-lanterns?" The doctor asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's a little-known translation," I said absently while staring at the picture. My stomach was tied in knots. Dean looked up and flashed his trademark lady-killer smile.

"Beth here is a bit of a religious…expert," he explained.

"Ah," the doctor said, glancing at me. "Well, Anna's father is a church deacon. When she became ill, her paranoia took on religious overtones. She was convinced the devil was about to rise up and end the world," she said to us. There was no doubt in my mind, this was the girl we were looking for. "I hope you find her. It's dangerous for her to be out there alone right now."

Milton Home

Beth's POV

"You know this kind of reminds me of the day we came after you," Dean said as we pulled up in front of the Milton house.

"Oh?" I asked, looking at him curiously. We'd never really talked about that day.

"Yeah… Dad, he was so anxious, he was freaking out, and I didn't have any idea why – hadn't ever heard of you or your dad before, but here we were busting our asses to get half way across the country as quickly as we could."

"We only stopped for gas," Sam said softly from the back seat, his voice sounding miles away. "Dad said we had the time it took to fill up the car to go to the bathroom or get food, that was it." I chuckled, thinking about how that conversation would have gone down.

"When we arrived my heart was pounding so hard I thought it might leap out of my chest, and here's Dad, all business, pulling out guns and holy water and racing up the steps to the house," Dean said, shutting off the car engine and looking at me.

"After we found you…and had exorcised the demon, I realised your Dad was a minister. But he was clearly a hunter as well, and our dads knew each other, but you had no idea. He'd kept it from you, given you a normal life…"

"Not that it did me any good. I would have been better off knowing, I might be stopped it." I said softly, shaking my head.

"You can't know that," Dean said, reaching out and squeezing my hand.

"It's okay," I said, smiling sadly. "I made my peace with that day a long time ago."

Dean frowned and then nodded slightly, squeezing my hand again.

"Come on, let's go," he said, looking back at Sam who nodded.

As we walked along the foot path up to the house I felt like Dean had described. My heart was pounding fiercely in my chest and I was nervous, worried for this girl.

Dean knocked on the door and then shrugged when there was no answer.

"Maybe they're not home," I suggested.

"Both cars are in the driveway," Sam pointed out.

I sighed, that wasn't a good sign at all. Dean tried the handle, and finding it unlocked, opened the door and stuck his head inside.

"Mr and Mrs Milton?" He called out.

"We're from the Sheriff's Department. We just wanted to ask you a couple of questions," Sam added as Dean swung the door open all the way.

Not getting an answer, we entered the house, Dean veering to the left while Sam and I walked into the living room on the right. Immediately we saw the bodies of an older couple lying dead on the floor, both their throats cut.

"Ahhh, man," I muttered with a sigh, shaking my head. I felt Dean come up behind me almost instantly while Sam crouched in front of the bodies, touching a powdered substance on the floor.

"Hmm," he said, flinching back with a grimace as he brought the substance up to his nose. "Sulphur."

"The demons beat us here," I said, glancing at Dean who was frowning.

"Yeah," Sam said, standing up. "Whatever the deal is with this Anna girl…."

"Yeah, they want her. They're not screwing around," Dean said with a nod. He ran a hand across his face and his brow creased as he started to consider the situation. He picked up some addressed envelopes sitting on a table and flipped through them. "All right, so, I'm Girl Interrupted, and I know the score of the apocalypse, just busted out of the nut-box…possibly using superpowers by the way. Where do I go?"

I thought about it, looking around the house, all signs pointed to home, but clearly she hadn't returned here. Or had she? Maybe the demons had taken her when she showed up. Sam glanced over at me, picking up a photograph from the mantle over the fireplace.

"Hey Beth, you got those sketches from Anna's notebook?"

"Yeah," I said with a nod, pulling them out of my jacket.

"Let me see them," Sam said, bringing the photo over to me. It was of Anna and her parents standing in front of their church. "Check this out."

I saw it almost instantly, the window. Flipping through the sketches I nodded, looking up at Sam. "She was drawing the window of her church."

"Over and over," Dean said, looking around my shoulder at the photo then the sketches.

"She's religious, scared, and has demons after her. I know where I'd be going to feel safe," I commented, looking at Dean. Same place I went every night just to try and get some of the horror of the day out of my life. Holy ground.

Church

Dean's POV

Sam led the way through the church and I had to chuckle at Beth's distasteful look at him when he drew his gun in the middle of the chapel. I shook my head, even I knew better than that, but Sam just ignored her and pushed through to the back of the building. So far we'd avoided encountering anyone, and were making our way up the stairs to the attic of the church which appeared to be a storage area for various religious items and card tables, no doubt used for fetes and other church events.

As we reached the top of the stairs I pulled my gun too, and saw Beth reaching for hers.

"Guys," Sam whispered, pointing his gun toward an area at the back where we saw the shadow of someone hiding behind a stained glass panel. Beth put a hand on Sam's arm and removed her hand from under her jacket, leaving her gun tucked into her waistband.

"Anna?" Beth called out, waving at us to put our guns away. "We're not going to hurt you. We're here to help. My name is Beth." She took a couple more steps into the large open room, eyes focused on the person hiding. "These are my brothers Sam and Dean."

"Beth?" A scared voice sounded from behind the glass. "Not Beth Winchester?"

Beth hesitated and glanced at me, she was still getting used to going by the name Winchester, it made me chuckle.

"Uh, yeah," she answered, nodding. The girl stepped out into the open, looking at us with wide frightened blue eyes. She looked straight at me and I felt like she was looking through me.

"And you're Dean?" She asked, to which I nodded.

"The Dean?" She stated with extra emphasis. Beth turned to look at me incredulously.

"The Dean? Man you do get around," She said with a raised eyebrow, and I grinned at her, knowing it would flame the little green dragon just a bit. The last time she'd heard me referred to as The Dean had been at Ben's birthday party, the day she'd met Lisa and found out I had a son.

I looked back at Anna who was waiting expectantly. "Well, yeah. The Dean, I guess," shrugging a Beth.

"It's really you," Anna said, almost in awe. "Oh my God. The angels talk about you," she took a few tentative steps toward us. "You were in Hell, but Castiel pulled you out, and some of them think you can help save us," she said. Anna turned to look at Sam. "And some of them don't like you at all." This had Sam frowning, but I thought it was kind of deserved, he had been a bit of a dick hanging around with Ruby.

"They talk about you all the time," Anna continued, taking Beth's hands in her own and smiling. "I feel like I know you."

"So, you talk to angels?" I asked, shaking my head a little. How did this make her different to Beth? Ezekiel said she was different, but I couldn't see it right now.

"Oh, no." Anna said. "No, no way. Um, they probably don't even know I exist. I just kind of… overhear them."

"You overhear them?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, they talk, and sometimes I just… hear them… in my head," she looked at Beth. "Like you."

"Can you hear them now?" Beth asked and she shook her head.

"Not right this second, but a lot. And I can't shut them out, there are so many of them," Anna answered. Beth nodded as if she understood what she was going through.

"So, they lock you up with a case of the crazies when really you were just…tuning in to angel radio?" I asked, looking at her.

"Yes," Anna said turning to me. "Thank you!" She sounded genuinely relieved that we actually believed her.

"Anna, when did the voices start?" Beth asked and I noticed that Anna was still clutching at her hands, this girl was scared. "Do you remember?"

"I can tell you exactly – September 18th," Anna said. Beth turned to look at me, her eyes widening.

"The day I got out of Hell," I said, glancing at Sam.

"First words I heard, clear as a bell – 'Dean Winchester is saved.'" Anna said, "It was your voice," she added to Beth, who sucked in a short breath, closing her eyes. I reached out and put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing tightly. I knew she still dreamed of that night. Castiel had come to her in a dream, but she didn't realise it was reality at the time, she didn't know she was a vessel.

He'd asked her to use her body to slip into Hell, saying that there was a better chance of success if he was able to take a physical form no one would expect. Not even hesitating, even in a dream, she'd agreed if it meant getting me out. It still chilled me to the bone thinking about it. I didn't remember it, but Beth said Cas had grabbed me, pulling me away from a demon with white eyes – I can only assume it had been Ashmedai - who had been instructing me in the finer arts of pleasure and pain.

Beth had woken up thinking it was a dream, when in actuality, Cas had just returned her to bed, no longer needing her as a vessel.

"What do you think?" I asked Sam, who shrugged.

"It's above my pay grade, man."

"Well, at least now we know why the demons want you so bad. They get a hold of you, they can hear everything the other side's cooking. You're 1-900-Angel." I said and Anna smiled at the little joke. I decided I liked her, anyone who could appreciate my jokes got a nod from me.

"Hey um, do you know – are my parents okay?" Anna asked. "I – I didn't go home. I was afraid."

The door behind us swung open and I rolled my eyes as Ruby came rushing through.

"You got the girl? Good, let's go!" She insisted.

"Her face!" Anna cried out, letting go of Beth and backing up, a look of fear on her face.

"It's okay," Sam said. "She's here to help."

"Yeah, don't be so sure," I muttered, gaining a glare from Sam.

"We have to hurry," Ruby said.

"Why?" Beth asked, looking at Ruby with as much wariness as I was feeling.

"Because a demon's coming – big-timer. We can fight later, guys." Ruby said.

"Well, that's pretty convenient – showing up right when we find the girl with some bigwig on your tail?" I snapped. It seemed like she was always showing up at the most convenient of times.

"I didn't bring him here. You did." Ruby said.

"What?"

"He followed you from the girl's house," she said. "We got to go now." She looked genuinely scared and while I wasn't about to show it, I was feeling the panic to get out of there in a hurry.

"Dean," Beth said, pointing to a statue of Mary that was bleeding from the eyes.

"It's too late," Ruby said, seeing it too. "He's here."

Sam grabbed Anna by the arm and pulled her into the back of the room, hiding her in the closet. "Okay. Stay in there," Sam instructed. "Don't move." I exchanged a look with Beth, and debated telling her to hide with Anna, but I knew better than to walk down that road. If she felt she needed to be with Anna, she'd be there.

As he returned, Sam pulled a flask of holy water out of his pocket.

"No Sam, you got to pull him right away," Ruby said.

"Whoa, hold on a sec," I said, feeling instantly on edge at the talk about Sam using any of his psychic powers.

"Now's not the time to bellyache about Sam going dark side. He does his thing, he exorcises that demon, or we die," Ruby said and that stopped me.

I glanced from Ruby to Sam who was looking uncomfortable at the idea, but put the flask away just the same.

We waited, breathless and our hearts pounding for the demon to come. His footsteps echoed ominously up the stairs as he got closer, and then the door burst open. I found myself looking at a middle-aged man with a comb-over wearing a brown suit. He scowled when he saw us and proceeded into the room without any hesitation whatsoever.

Sam stretched out a hand toward him, and I could see him straining to yank the demon out of its vessel, but it wasn't working. The demon in front of us coughed a little and then his eyes flashed white, just like Lilith's, before fading to brown again.

"That tickles," he said in a strange husky voice, waving his finger in the air at Sam. "You don't have the juice to take me on, Sam." He stepped forward, grasping in the air like he had just taken a handful of shirt, and he yanked back. Sam started to fly through the air as if by invisible tether, and he was propelled behind the demon and through the railing, falling down the stairs.

"Sam!" Beth called out as I pulled the knife out of my jacket.

"Beth, get Anna out of here, now." I instructed before lunging at the demon. He blocked my downward swing with his left arm, and I lashed out with a left hook. The demon caught my left arm in his right hand and pinned it to my chest, still holding the knife at bay easily while I struggled to break his hold.

"Hello again, Dean," he said as I grappled to move us. He grabbed my shirt, swinging me hard against the wall and I dropped the knife. Ruby had moved to the closet and I heard Anna scream as she pulled her out, for once I actually hoped that hell bitch was on our side.

Beth had been stunned momentarily but was now on the move, she slid along the floorboards, coming along next to me and grabbing the knife I'd dropped. Taking it in hand she swung upwards with a hard blow, bringing her arm up and under my own which was pinned by the demon. She was aiming for the chest, but the demon let go of my left arm and blocked her. With a snarl, he twisted her wrist and squeezed at the same time. She cried out in pain, dropping the knife.

"Nice to see your stay in Hell hasn't damaged your marriage any," he said as he looked her up and down. "Fine piece of ass, but nothing like you had down below, hey Dean?" He made another twisting motion and sent Beth flying across the room into a wall, she hit hard with a cry and fell to the floor motionless.

Rage boiled to the surface in me as I renewed my efforts to get free of the demon, but he was so much stronger than me. He held me against the wall as if I were a child as I swung and hit him with a right hook, barely even snapping his head back. I felt searing fire run down my face as he returned the right hook, and followed with a left jab. Hot blood trickled down my nose as he looked smugly down at me.

"Come on Dean, don't you recognise me?" He asked, grabbing my shirt and pulling me closer to him. I narrowed my eyes, trying to figure who the Hell he was. "Oh, I forgot – I'm wearing a paediatrician. But we were so close…in Hell."

Something about the way he said that, and the flash of recognition behind his eyes hit me in the stomach like a knife. My body tensed, I felt every cell in my body scream and want to run with fear as he punched me again. The metallic taste of my bleeding nose hit me and I tried to fight the terror that was threatening to engulf me.

"Alastair," I muttered. He smiled and then chuckled, hitting me again. White, blinding pain stabbed through me and I groaned. It wasn't like he hadn't heard much worse from me.

Sam picked up the knife Beth had dropped beside us and Alastair dropped me, turning to face my brother as he rammed the knife deep into his chest. There was a sizzling pop as the knife entered, but Alastair barely even flinched.

"You're gonna have to try a whole lot harder than that, son," he said, his lip curling cruelly as he took hold of Sam, swinging him around and throwing him further into the room. Alastair grabbed at the knife, grimacing slightly as he pulled it from his body. Hands were grasping at me and I realised Beth had found her way back to my side, and she looked urgently at Alastair before helping me up.

"Come on, we gotta go," she said, pulling me away only to find Alastair blocking the exit. We glanced at each other and then I spotted the stained glass window, grimacing.

"You're not gonna like it," I said, nodding and she bit her lip.

"Oh damn," she muttered, but nodded. Sam climbed to his feet and looked as if he was going to charge after Alastair who was now calmly walking toward us, knife in hand.

"Sam!" Beth called out, and then I took her hand, running at the window. I hit it first, hoping to take most of the brunt, but the glass splintered as we both fell through to the ground below. I heard her cry out and roll as she landed and there was a pop and searing pain in my shoulder as I hit. God damn, I'd just done a number on myself. Sam came barrelling down beside us and I forced myself to my feet, we had to keep moving, we had to run.

Grasping at Beth's hips, I pulled her up, Sam also helping to steady her as we looked up to see Alastair watching us from the window. He made no effort to follow, but one thing was for sure, he had won this round.

Motel Room

Beth's POV

A huge shard of glass had cut into my upper arm as we hit the ground, it needed stitches and, being that we were now on Hell's most wanted list, a hospital was out of the question. Not that it mattered because between the three of us we had enough experience to rival any field medic, but as Sam prepared to put the needle through my skin again without any pain killers, I was starting to lament the conveniences of modern medicine.

"Gah!" I muttered as he put the eighth stitch in, pulling the skin tight. "Oh frick me," I said, grasping Sam's thigh tightly as I faced him.

"You okay?" He asked, and I nodded, feeling the sweat pouring down my face as I grit my teeth.

"Yeah, just finish it," I said, licking my lips.

Dean came in from the bathroom where he'd been washing blood from his face, and threw me a sympathetic look.

"Almost done?" He asked and Sam nodded.

"I'm going as fast as I can," he said.

"Good, 'cause you know I got a dislocated shoulder over here," Dean said, picking up a bottle of whiskey and drinking from it long and hard.

"Yeah, I'll pop it back when I'm finished," Sam said, shaking his head at Dean's impatience and cutting the thread.

"Give me that," he said as Dean finished taking a drink. Taking the bottle, Sam poured some of the alcohol over his completed stitches and I hissed at the sting it sent down my whole arm. I used my right arm to grab at the bottle from him, taking three or four gulps of whiskey to dull the pain.

"So you lost the magic knife?" Dean said, standing next to us.

"Yeah, saving your ass. Who the Hell was that demon?" Sam asked, looking up at him.

"No one good," Dean answered quietly, looking at me. I could see a haunted expression behind those eyes, he was braving some bad memories.

"We have to find Anna," I said, drawing his attention back to the moment.

"Ruby's got her. I'm sure she's okay," Sam said. He stood up, limping a bit from his own injuries where he'd sprained his ankle on the fall, and looking at Dean. "Come on," he said, positioning himself next to Dean and placing his hands at his shoulder and arm.

He checked in with Dean, nodding and then said, "On three. One…" Dean yelled in pain as Sam forced his shoulder back into the socket ahead of the count. Gasping in pain, Dean walked back into the bathroom, hanging his head and groaning a little.

"You sure about Ruby?" He asked, his voice echoing out to us. "Because I think it's just as likely she used us to find radio girl and then brought that demon in to kill us."

"No, she took Anna to keep her safe," Sam argued.

"Yeah. Well why hasn't she called to tell us where she is?" Dean asked, and I had to admit, he had a point.

"Because that demon is probably watching us right now, waiting to follow us right back to Anna again. That's why he let us go," Sam said

"You call this letting us go?" Dean asked, turning around with a grunt.

"Yeah, hey I thought that's why we were laying low, you mean I could have gone to a hospital to get this sorted?" I said, "Oh the sweet bliss of pain killers," I groaned, lying back on the bed. Dean chuckled at me.

"Wuss," he said and I laughed, nodding. "You know you rarely have to get stitches, this is kind of funny."

"Yeah, I'm not so keen on it," I agreed. "At least I fed you a steady drip of whiskey whenever you got yours."

Dean looked contemplatively at me and then nodded, pouring a couple of shots of whiskey into a glass and then walking over to me, holding it to my lips, I gratefully drank from the glass. When finished I lay back with another groan, sighing happily.

"Mmm better."

"You guys done?" Sam asked, rolling his eyes at us. Dean shrugged at me and sat down on the bed, looking over at Sam.

"Look, killing us would've been no problem to that thing," Sam continued. "That's why, for now, we just got to lay low and wait for Ruby to contact us."

"How's she gonna do that?" Dean asked. Sam shrugged.

"Why do you trust her so much?" I asked, frowning and sitting up.

"I told you," Sam answered.

"You got to do better that that," Dean said, looking over at him and Sam bristled, automatically reading the worst into Dean's comments. "Hey, I'm not trying to pick a fight here. I mean, I really want to understand. But I need to know more. I mean, I deserve to know more."

Sam hesitated, glancing at me and then looking at the floor, nodding to himself.

"Because… she saved my life," Sam said. "She saved both our lives." Dean looked at me and I shrugged.

"Still not convinced on that, she brought those thugs with her… if she hadn't been coming after us, then there'd have been no one to be saved from," I said.

"Yeah, well that wasn't the only time," Sam said, looking at me.

"What are you guys talking about?" Dean asked. I met his eyes, sighing, and Sam started to speak.

Motel Room

Sam's POV

"It was about two and half months after you died," I started, taking a deep breath. "We'd been doing everything we could to find a way to get you out, we went to crossroads, several devil's gates, voodoo witch doctors, and spoke with every religious expert we could find… nothing was working. Jefferson was off on his own quest to find a religious angle, he'd also suggested we go after Lilith because she held your contract, but we weren't getting far with that either."

I stopped, thinking back to the day Ruby had found us, it was still clear in my mind and I looked at Beth, sighing.

I stood helplessly in the chapel foyer listening to Beth as she sobbed through her prayers; she came here morning and night, her prayers never changing. She begged the angels, God, whoever was listening for mercy, to reverse the deal and intercede on Dean's behalf. When she was really bad she'd beg to be taken in his place, to end his torment and her crying would be inconsolable. She'd started out strong, but after we'd received that DVD from Maggie, she'd had a visual reminder of what she was missing, and she tortured herself with it regularly.

I sighed, running a hand across my tired eyes. I felt like I hadn't slept in weeks. I had managed a few hours of sleep each night, it just never felt like it. Beth was having nightmares every night, and would wake me with her cries, often yelling for Dean and then rolling over into the pillows she would pile up beside her and then cry herself back to sleep. I felt useless, I couldn't help her, and I felt just as desolate as she, only I wasn't allowed to show it; I had to be strong for her.

As a result I'd taken to drinking more and more, trying to dull the pain, and also pass out so that I didn't have to hear her through the night. She was drinking too, but not nearly as much as I was starting to put away every night. I tried to hide it, but she was worried, and worse than that, she was starting to lecture. I was beginning to think it was a little too much like the pot calling the kettle black, though I had to admit, she never drank so much that she passed out for hours on end.

I turned back toward the motel across the road and thought about what was to come. We'd had a lead on a demon, and as soon as Beth was through with her prayers and pulled herself together for the day, we would move and take it down. I pulled out Ruby's knife, looking at it as it glinted in the early morning light. It was our only asset where the demons were concerned. We'd started to come up with a few torturous moves using it that nearly always got the demon spilling their guts if they knew anything. Problem was finding someone in the know.

I paused, looking up and seeing Dean staring at Beth who was curled up next to him in bed, her head in his lap. He had such a look of melancholy on his face, like he wanted to take back all her pain if he could. Beth rolled on to her back to look up at him and he brushed the hair out of her eyes with a smile.

"I'm sorry," he said softly and she sighed, nodding.

"It wasn't your fault," she replied and I felt guilt settle in my stomach. They'd been through Hell, loss and pain, and continued to do so, all for me. I pushed it back and took another deep breath as Dean looked at me, nodding for me to continue.

"Well, that day, we caught a demon who supposedly knew someone who could get us to Lilith," I continued and Beth nodded. "She wasn't cooperating though, even when we used the knife to try and get information out of her. She kept pushing and pushing and said some really nasty things to Beth. At one point I pulled Beth out of the room because I couldn't listen to it anymore, and I could see her wavering…" Beth sighed and nodded.

"Yeah… she was a bitch."

"That was when Ruby showed up with two goons. Caught us unexpectedly, taking the knife from me. Then just as I thought she was going to kill us both, she stabbed the demon holding me, and then threw the knife, hitting the other one holding Beth and freeing us both. She didn't have to do that, she could have just killed us like Lilith had ordered her to do." I finished, looking at Dean.

"Still going with they wouldn't have been there if she wasn't," Beth muttered and I frowned. She wasn't going to let up on that, was she?

"Well, someone would have come for us eventually; maybe it was luck that Ruby got sent, because she wants to help us." I said. Beth sighed, shaking her head and Dean frowned down at her.

"Let's just hear the rest of the story," Dean said, looking up at me.

"Well, you know some of it," I said with a shrug. "Beth refused to come with us, threw me the keys to the Impala, so I took it. We were getting nowhere as we were, so I figured maybe Ruby would be able to give me the inside edge I needed, she had just saved my life, and she was keen to help. Of course, it took her a little bit of effort to convince me…"

"You know what sounds good?" Ruby asked, sitting beside me as I drove the Impala away from where I'd been staying with Beth for the last few weeks. "French fries. I just escaped Hell. I deserve a treat," Ruby said with a grin, looking at me. Her face fell at the lack of enthusiasm from me.

"You know a 'thank you' would be nice." She said.

"Who asked for your help?" I asked testily, Beth's words still echoing in my head, I was starting to have second thoughts.

"You have no idea what I've been through. When Lilith gets pissed, she gets creative," Ruby said, looking sternly at me. "You want to hear about the corners of Hell I've seen, Sam?"

"No, I don't."

"And the things I had to do to convince her I was sorry? That I could be trusted?"

"Well, this'll definitely get you a fat Christmas bonus," I said, eyes on the road.

"Very funny," Ruby said, rolling her eyes. "I'm a fugitive… for you, Sam. I took all this risk to get back to you, so, yeah, I deserve a damn 'thank you'," she finished. I shook my head, glaring at her.

"Who asked you to save me?"

"I'm just trying to help," Ruby said.

"Can you help me save Dean?" I asked, that was my only focus right now.

"No," Ruby answered quietly. "Nothing I know of is powerful enough to do that."

I snapped, pulling the car to a screeching stop by the side of the road.

"Then I have no use for you," I said, staring straight ahead. Beth had been right, she was useless.

"What?" Ruby asked incredulously.

"Get out," I ordered.

"Sam."

"Whose body are you riding, Ruby?" I asked, thinking about all the people we'd managed to help in the last month by exorcising them of the demons that had been riding them hard, almost like they wanted to break them.

"What do you care? You've never asked me that before," Ruby said.

"I'm asking now."

"Some secretary," she said with a slight sigh.

"Let her go."

"Sam…"

"Or I send you right back to Hell," I said.

"You would have exorcised her?" Beth asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, I was pissed, she'd just told me nothing could save Dean, so what was I keeping her around for? I'd just left you, and I know you think I did it without so much as a second thought, but that's not true Beth. You're my big sister, I love you, and leaving you in that chapel was the hardest thing I'd ever done." I said quietly and I saw tears shimmer in her eyes as she rolled back on to her side to watch me.

"Well, whatever, clearly you stuck it out with Ruby?" Dean cut in and I nodded.

"Yeah, I dumped her on the side of the road, and I find this abandoned house to stay in. I called Beth but she had her phone off, so I figured I'd try again in the morning. In the meantime, I'm cleaning my guns, drinking profusely, and trying to nut out a new course of action. Then there's a knock on the door, and I'm confused, not expecting anyone…"

I opened the door and standing there in front of me was a short woman sporting a tan and long black hair, holding a piece of paper.

"Proof!" She declared, handing the paper to me. "This body is 100% socially conscious. I recycle. Al Gore would be proud," she said sarcastically, pushing her way into the hallway.

"You grabbed a coma patient?" I asked, reading over the paperwork and realising it was Ruby talking to me.

"You didn't want me to take a body with someone in it, and I made sure that the spirit was gone," Ruby said, walking down toward the living area. "Apartment was empty. You happy?"

"Why are you here?" I asked, still confused as to what she wanted from me.

"I can't bring Dean back. But I can get you something else that you want," Ruby said, turning to face me.

"And, uh…what's that?" I asked. Dean was the only thing I wanted right now.

"Lilith."

My heart skipped a beat when she said that. If we could get to Lilith, we could kill her, maybe bargain with her to release Dean if we agreed to spare her life. But it was clear what I'd have to do in order to run that kind of deal. I'd been giving it a lot of thought actually.

"You want me to use my psychic whatever," I said, cautious.

"Look, I know that it spooks you…"

"Skip the speech," I cut in, much to her surprise. "I'm ready. Let's go."

"Slow down there cowboy," Ruby said, her eyes suddenly concerned.

"Just tell me what I have to do," I said. I was ready, it was time, and maybe this is what I'd been looking for all along. Someone to tell me it was okay to give in to these powers, to use them to help me for once in my life. Beth would never agree, she was just as annoying as Dean on that front, but she wasn't here anymore – maybe it was a sign.

"Look, Lilith is one scary bitch. When I was in the Pit, there was talk. She's cooking up something big – apocalyptic big," Ruby said.

"So let's kill her."

"You want to go in there and half-ass it like before?" Ruby asked, shaking her head. "We have the time to get it right. Let's get it right."

"Okay," I agreed. "What do you want from me?"

"Well," Ruby said, eyeing me off. "A little patience…" I scoffed at her. "And sobriety." She said this as I took a swig from the whiskey bottle in my hand.

"Promise me that…and I will teach you everything I know."

"So what did she teach you?" Dean asked, watching me intently, wrapped up in the story. He was softly stroking along Beth's forehead as she lay in his lap and I saw her eyes fluttering with exhaustion. The pain and alcohol finally getting to her, she fell asleep with a whimper.

"Well," I said, raising my eyebrow as sighing. "First thing I learned…I'm a crappy student."

The demon in front of me was infuriating. The only light was from the fireplace, and it was playing with my mind, the shadows jumping across us. I turned my attention to the man in front of me, tied to a chair inside a devil's trap. I pulled on my power within, focusing on hooking in to the demon inside, but each time I tried to pull the creature, I'd only get so far. The black smoke of the demon would come out of the mouth for a small distance, and then it would go back in as I felt it slipping through my fingers, like water.

The second time the smoke went back in the demon laughed loudly at me, just adding insult to injury. I grabbed at my head as it started to split with pain. This was killing me. Ruby scowled and walked up to the demon, stabbing him in the stomach.

"Not funny," she said, watching as he died right in front of her. She turned to look at me as I struggled, fighting back the pain.

A short while later I'd buried the body out back, and was starting to thinking too much about the bottle of whiskey on the table. Ruby was hovering inside, watching me as I popped a couple of aspirin out of a bottle and washed it down with the whiskey.

"Just give it time, Sam. It'll get better."

"What? I need more practice?" I asked, scowling at her.

"I'm not talking about pulling demons," she said as I glanced at my phone. There was a new message there, telling me I had another voicemail. I knew without checking who it was from: Beth. She'd been calling every couple of days, but I couldn't talk to her. She'd read it in my voice and insist on coming to me, helping. I had to do this without her, to keep her safe.

"I know losing Dean was – "

"Hey!" I said loudly, pointing Ruby and interrupting her mid-sentence. "I don't want to talk about it. You know what? Where do you get off slapping me with that greeting-card, time-heals crap? Did you see Beth in that church? What the Hell do you know?"

Ruby sucked in a breath, a shadow flicking behind her eyes as she looked at me. "I used to be human. And I still remember what it feels like to lose someone," she said. "I'm sorry." She stepped up, putting a hand on my shoulder and that was starting to feel just a little too comfortable.

"Uhn-huh, don't." I said, pushing her hand away. It felt too good. "I can't…" I said, looking at her.

"Sam, you're not alone," Ruby said, and before I could stop her she grabbed my head, pulling herself up to my face and kissing me hard. I reached up, wanting to run my hands through her long black hair, wanting to give in. Instead I pushed her back, standing up and walking away, shaking my head. I couldn't, it wasn't right, she was a demon!

"What are you doing?" I asked, stalking into the next room and sitting down on a couch.

"Sam, it's okay!" Ruby said, turning to me.

"No, that is anything but okay!" I snapped at her.

"What's wrong?" Ruby asked, the pain of rejection in her voice.

"What's wrong?" I asked angrily. "Where do I start?!"

I stared into the dying embers of the fire, shaking my head and fighting against every urge in my body that was telling me just to give in and take what I wanted, to take what she wanted to give me.

"Is it because of the body?" Ruby asked, walking over and standing in front of me, shrugging out of her jacket. "Because I told you… it's all me inside of here." She knelt in front of me, her hands resting on my knees as she moved in closer, her lips mere inches from mine. "There is no one else."

She took my right hand and pressed it against her stomach, sliding it over her hip. "And it's nice inside this body, Sam. Soft and warm…" I sucked in a breath, trying to fight it, shaking my head – but she felt so good, so warm, and I just wanted to touch her.

"What are you doing?" I asked instead.

"Isn't it because you're really scared to go there with a demon?" She asked, pressing in against me. I could feel her breasts as they rubbed against my chest, and her breath was hot on my neck as she nuzzled into my neck. "Because it's wrong and it's bad and we shouldn't?"

I groaned, pulling away but she moved my hands along her skin again and I gave in, it had been so long since I'd known any comfort, and I really needed her now. I moaned, grabbing her head and holding it still as my lips found hers, kissing her with a frenzy. I was still trying to fight it, yet my body was giving in to it at the same time, I'd never been so conflicted in my life.

Lifting her from her knees, I easily slid Ruby onto my lap, grinding her against my already hardening erection. I groaned, thrusting up at her slightly as she slid her arms around me. I slid my hands into her hair as she kissed me back. With a gasp for breath, she broke away, and I peeled away her top, releasing her soft, perky breasts from underneath. She hadn't been wearing a bra, and this knowledge made my arousal grow even harder.

Ruby stripped me of my own t-shirt as I grabbed a fistful of hair, pulling her head back so I could kiss her neck. I gasped with pleasure as she ripped her nails down my back; the pain felt good, like I needed it with the pleasure. Within minutes I had her out of her trousers, and she slid my pants down, freeing my hard erection. As I watched, her eyes darkened with desire and she plunged down on me, impaling herself….

"Sam?" Dean's voice startled me back to the present.

"Yeah?"

"Too much information," he said with a frown. I looked down and noticed he'd covered Beth's ear with his hand, even though she was sleeping soundly at this point.

"Hey, I told you I was coming clean," I said to him, trying not to laugh.

"Yeah, but now I feel dirty," Dean muttered, shaking his head and taking a sip of the whiskey he had in hand.

"Dean, I can't tell you how many times I've walked in on you two, or woken up to one of your midnight romps… and you're feeling dirty just listening?"

"That's different," Dean said.

"How?"

"Well… we're uh… we're married, yeah. And Beth's not a demon," Dean answered. I raised my eyebrow, shaking my head at him. The truth was, at the end of the day, the difference was that it wasn't him walking in on me. Never let it be said that my brother didn't have double standards.

"Okay, well, uh, brain-stabbing imagery aside... So far, all you've told me about is a manipulative bitch who, uh, screwed you, played mind games with you, and did everything in the book to get you to go bad, including ignoring Beth who was reaching out to you man."

"Yeah, well, there's more to the story," I said, smarting a little at the Beth comment.

"Just…skip the nudity, please," Dean said, shaking his head.

I paused, rolling my eyes, but thinking I could just leave him hanging – however this was my story and one that obviously Beth hadn't told him, not that she knew all of it.

"Pretty soon after... that, um... I put together some signs... Omens."

"Saying what?"

"Lilith was in town. And I wanted to strike her first."

Ruby was following me around the house as I prepared, shoving all my demon-hunting supplies into the weapons bag.

"You're not ready," she stated and I turned, looking at her.

"It's now or never."

"No, we gotta wait until you get it right. You haven't been too successful."

I pulled the knife out of the bag, brandishing it in front of her. "All right, I'll use this."

"Stop." Ruby said, grabbing my wrist and looking up at me with troubled dark eyes. "You can't just fly in there reckless, Sam. We need you to take the bitch out."

"Oh, I'll take her out all right," I sneered, I was angry and I was ready, this was going down.

"You get one shot, and you're it," Ruby said, releasing my hand with a jerk. "You're the only one who can do it, Sam. So if she kills you first…" I smirked at that comment, looking away and then back at her. Ruby stopped speaking, observing my face.

"What?" I asked when she stared at me, no longer speaking.

"You don't want to survive this."

"Come on," I scoffed. Truth was, she was right. I was still smarting from the way I'd hurt Beth when she'd walked in on us one night. I'd been in the middle of having sex with Ruby, but Beth hadn't known it was the demon, so I was able to play that down but not before getting so upset with her that I'd said some of the nastiest things I'd ever said. And I'd meant them.

I was so damn angry with Beth, she'd caught me at a low point and I'd just dug myself even deeper. I replayed in my head some of the things I'd said to her, accusing her of not caring about Dean, saying it was her fault he was in Hell and no longer with us. Just as I thought I wouldn't get any lower I'd swung the final blow where I'd told her she was poison, and she made those around her weak, and I'd said I wished Dad had left her in Wisconsin the day we'd found her. And I damn well meant it.

Now that she was gone, I didn't care what happened to her, she could put a bullet through her brain and I was too numb to care, I just wanted my brother back and it wasn't going to happen, so I was doing the next best thing. I was going to take out the bitch who had put him there, and if she killed me in the process, so be it.

"It's a kamikaze attack," Ruby said, looking at me. "You want to die fighting Lilith."

"That's stupid," I denied, but she had hit the nail right on the head. I walked away before she could see it in my eyes, and she chased after me.

"No, it's the truth, because if you kill her and you survive this, then you have to go on without your brother! You've pushed Beth away, she's gone, and there's nobody left. This isn't what Dean would've wanted. This isn't what he died for," Ruby said, cutting in front of me and pushing her back to the door, blocking the exit.

"Get out of my way," I said in a threatening tone to her. She wasn't going to stop me, I didn't care what we'd been doing to each other.

"No, Sam. This is suicide!"

I grabbed her, pushing her against the wall and holding the knife to her throat, watching her eyes. I was in control here, not her, this was my call and I was going after Lilith, ready or not. Ruby didn't fight as I left her gasping against the wall, stalking out the door.

By the time I reached the house where there had been omens I had calmed down, now my head was clear. I pulled out the knife, and entered the house, seeing the little girl – Lilith – at the dining table. I crept up on her, the knife extended up, ready to be thrust down into the kid when she turned, tears running down her face.

"Please, I want to go home," she cried and I realised my mistake too late. Two demons grabbed me from behind and I was disarmed, the knife falling to the ground.

"Lilith sends her regrets," one of them said, getting in my face. "She couldn't make it."

Suddenly the other demon called out in surprise and then fell to the ground. I looked to see Ruby had followed me, taking the knife and attacking.

"Take the girl and run!" Ruby called out as she circled face to face with the other demon, twirling the knife in her hand.

I nodded, grabbing the girl and leaving by the French doors nearby, running with her to the car. I put her in, and then looked back through the window. Ruby was fighting with the demon, but he'd gotten the upper hand. He was twisting her hand in front of him and with a pained cry she dropped the knife, looking scared. I ran back as hard as I could. I got into the room in time to see him slam Ruby up against the wall.

"Rhuddem," the demon said with a smirk. "You're in so much trouble. When we get you down in the basement – the things we're gonna do to you."

Reaching forth with my hand, I concentrated, pulling on that place inside of me that held my rage, my darkness, the part that held the demon blood circulating through me. The demon coughed, and I focused all my will on the cloud of smoke inside of him, imagining a hook sinking deeply into him and then pulling. Black smoke started to pour out of his mouth as he looked surprised and then fell to the floor, his demonic form being forced into Hell.

Ruby leaned heavily against the wall, gasping for breath as she looked at me with worry when she saw the blood dripping out of my nose. "Sam."

"I'm okay…" I reassured her with a nod. "Thanks."

I looked up at Dean, something I'd just said sitting wrong with me all of a sudden. I pushed it aside and shook my head. I had to finish what I was saying.

"Ruby came back for me. Whatever you have to say, she saved me. More than that, she got through to me," I said, watching Dean carefully. "What she said to me…it's what you would've said. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be here."

Dean scowled, shaking his head. "Yeah, but that's half the problem Sam. You push away the people who want to help you and run into the arms of the enemy."

"Ruby is not…"

"Rhuddem, Sam!" Dean said loudly, glancing down at Beth as she stirred from the sudden noise. He lowered his voice again, looking sternly at me. "That's what you say this demon called her?"

"Yeah."

"You don't recognise that name? You've heard it yelled enough over the years," Dean said and I frowned. I had? What was he talking about? Sure it sounded familiar but…

"Haven't you ever wondered why Ruby was so quick to cut Beth out of your life when I was gone?" Dean asked, and I shrugged. I hadn't, it didn't seem related.

"Rhuddem, Sam. Think harder. There was a reason I told Beth to stay away from that bitch Ruby." Dean sighed, leaning back against the headboard, his hand softly caressing Beth's hair.

"What?" I asked, feeling confused.

Dean moved Beth's head slightly, slipping his legs out from underneath and replacing them with a pillow. She sighed and buried her face in the pillow with a little whimper. I started to stare at her, clearly he was agitated because of this reference, and it had something to do with… I stopped, looking up at him. Beth had called that name out many times in her sleep.

"Yeah, now you're seeing it little brother," Dean said with a nod, standing up and walking over to the sink, placing his empty glass there.

"No…" I said, shaking my head.

"Yeah, that's what I thought too, but it's true."

"Ruby… Ruby is the demon who possessed Beth? Who killed her father?" Sam asked incredulously.

Motel Room

Dean's POV

I'd just told Sam what I swore I wouldn't tell anyone until I was ready to tell Beth. That Ruby had been the very demon to possess her; not only possess, but stab and kill her father during that time too. Sam was looking at me with horror, and I felt bad that I had to break it to him now that he'd just gotten through telling me he'd been sleeping with Ruby.

"Yeah, and the rest of her family too, from what Jefferson has told me. She's got a serious vendetta going on there." I said in answer to Sam's question.

"Why?" He asked, frowning.

"Like you can believe a word a demon says… but if you do, it had something to do with her selling her soul to save one of Beth's ancestors, and to repay the favour he went self-righteous church-goer on her and burned her at the stake."

"Ouch," Sam said and I nodded.

"Yeah, so for the last six hundred years or so she's been plotting her revenge, taking out the entire bloodline."

"But Ruby, she's helped save Beth…"

"An act, no doubt. I don't trust her, I think given half a chance she'd turn on Beth, and wouldn't hesitate to kill her."

"No, no, Dean, you're wrong."

"She told me herself!" I snapped at him. "As soon as Beth stops being useful she will turn like a rabid dog, and I will not stand by and let her harm Beth!"

"Calm down Dean, that's not going to happen, she's got Anna, sure, but Beth is here with us and she's safe. I just… I can't believe it." Sam said to me and I nodded.

"Yeah I know man, imagine if Beth found out," I said.

"You haven't told her?"

"Does it look like I've told her?!" I snapped and Sam sucked in a breath realising what a stupid question that had been.

"But you guys talk about everything," Sam pointed out.

"Yeah well, not about this, I can't… she doesn't need more stress put upon her. I'll tell her when the time is right."

"Dean… secrets aren't the best thing to keep in this family."

"I know! But look at her man," I said, gesturing to where I'd left her sprawled out on the bed, sleeping with a smile on her face. "We tell her now, she is gonna freak out, and she's been through enough. You know, we're only just getting back to good now, I'm not going to risk taking that away. I don't like it, but Ruby seems to be helping us, for now. But if she so much as looks at Beth in the wrong way… I will not hesitate to end her, you understand?"

Sam nodded quietly, thinking this statement over.

There was a sudden knock at the door. "Housekeeping," a woman said from the other side.

"Not now!" I called back.

"Sir, I've got clean towels," she insisted. I sighed and walked over to the door, opening it. A burly black maid in a uniform pushed her way into the room.

"Couldn't you just leave 'em at the door?" I asked, frowning at her as she closed the curtains and walked up to Sam, pressing a note into his hand.

"I'm at this address," she said.

"I'm sorry. What?" Sam asked.

"Go now. Go through the bathroom window, don't stop, don't take your car, don't pass go. There are demons in the hallway and in the parking lot," she said in a sassy booming voice.

"Ruby?" Sam asked incredulously.

"Okay, yes, so I'm possessing this maid for a hot minute. Sue me," she said with attitude and I did have to chuckle at that.

"What about…"

"Coma girl? Slowly rotting on the floor back at the cabin with Anna, so I've got to hurry back. See you when you get there. Go!" Ruby urged before leaving the room like a tornado, closing the door and leaving me standing there with fresh towels in my hands and what had to be the world's most stunned look on my face.

Cabin

Beth's POV

I was awoken to a throbbing arm and Dean's soft voice urging me to get up. I'd missed all the action while I slept. According to Dean, Ruby had come and possessed a maid in order to pass a message on to us. She was holed up in a cabin with Anna somewhere on the outskirts of town. We climbed out the bathroom window as instructed and made our way through the back alley to a car that was sitting a few blocks over. Dean hot-wired it and we were on our way.

The cabin was a hunting lodge, at this time of year it sat empty and unattended. It was a good choice for a hiding place.

"Glad you could make it," Ruby said as we arrived, letting ourselves in.

"Yeah, thanks," Sam said, nodding at her and walking over to Anna.

"Anna, are you okay?" He asked. The red-head was sitting on a couch and smiled when she saw us.

"Yeah. I think so. Ruby's not like other demons. She saved my life," Anna answered with another smile.

"Yeah, I hear she does that," Dean said, looking at Ruby. "I guess I… you know…"

"What?" Ruby asked, raising her eyebrow and I looked at him curiously.

"I guess I owe you for…Sam. And I just wanted … you know…" Dean looked uncomfortably at his feet and Ruby rolled her eyes.

"Don't strain yourself," she snapped and this seemed to get Dean back to his normal self.

"Okay then. Is the moment over?" He asked, Ruby nodded. "Good, 'cause that was awkward."

"Hey, Beth, do you think it'd be safe to make a quick call, just to tell my parents I'm okay?" Anna asked, looking up at me. "They must be completely freaked."

I felt a coldness settle in my stomach and hurt for the girl in front of me. Sitting down, I looked into those big blue eyes, so trusting and innocent. "Ummm, Anna… about that, your parents…" I found it hard to get the words out.

"What about them?" Anna asked, starting to look worried.

"Look, I'm sorry," I said, biting my lip. I put the message into my eyes, and she got it.

"No, they're not…" Anna shook her head, starting to put it together.

"Anna, I'm sorry," I offered, cringing as Anna burst into tears, rocking forward and holding her head with her hands. I reached out, rubbing her back in large round circles as she sobbed. Dean exchanged a sympathetic look with me and I sighed. I hated this part of the job.

"Why is this happening to me?!" Anna wailed, sitting back up and throwing her hands in the air.

"I don't know," I said softly. She sobbed again, dropping her head into her hands as we all watched, helpless to make her feel better.

Suddenly Anna sat up, gasping, and looking frightened. "They're coming." The lights to the cabin started to flicker and everyone looked around.

"Back room," Dean said to me and I nodded, pulling Anna to her feet and leading us into the room. "Stay there!" Dean called out, and this this I didn't argue. I leaned against the doorframe, listening to the movements in the room beyond. I could hear the others getting weapons, and the cocking of shotguns. I pulled my own gun out from the small of my back, but if these were demons, it wasn't going to do much good.

"Where's the knife?" Ruby asked and there was hesitation on the boys' part.

"Uh…about that," Dean said. There was a pause as Ruby digested what he was saying.

"You're kidding?" Ruby asked disgustedly.

"Hey, don't look at me," Dean said and I could imagine him pointing the finger at our little brother.

"Thanks a lot," Sam said.

"Great. Just peachy. Impeccable timing, guys, really," Ruby complained with a sigh.

I opened the door a crack, just in time to see the door to the cabin burst open. A blast of air swept into the room, and the guys and Ruby flinched as it hit them, then turned back to the open door. I felt a familiar presence and wasn't surprised to see Castiel walk in through the door, followed closely by Uriel.

"Please tell me you're here to help. We've been having demon issues all day," Dean said to Cas, who was looking around the room, his eyes wide and determined.

"Well, I can see that. You want to explain why you have that stain in the room?" Uriel asked, looking at Ruby.

"We're here for Anna," Cas said before anyone could answer Uriel.

"Here for her like…here for her?" Dean asked.

"Stop talking," Uriel ordered him and I felt a chill go down my spine. I recalled Uriel's conversation from the woods about how he would like nothing more than to kill us all, and I knew it was dangerous to piss off this angel. "Give her to us." Uriel said.

"Are you gonna help her?" Sam asked.

Castiel looked beyond Dean to meet my eyes from where I was hiding. It was dark, and a lesser being wouldn't have even known I was there, but this was no ordinary person, this was an angel, and one I was bonded to no less. He would have known I was there even with the door shut.

"No," Cas replied to Sam, still watching me. "She has to die."

~ To Be Continued ~

AUTHOR'S NOTES

Song for this chapter is: Forgive Me by Group 1 Crew. One of my favourites! I love scripture put into modern music, it's awesome.

Big thanks to everyone who reviewed or PM'ed last chapter, I really do appreciate it, and I will be getting around to responding to you individually if I haven't already, I've just been flat out with work and all my spare time has been simply put into this chapter. Just know that I love and cherish all your comments and they inspire me to keep writing xoxo

I am hoping to get the next update out fairly fast, but I am swamped at the moment, so I don't know how that will go. You might like to check out Highway to Hell- Faith, and Hell To Pay – Malleus Maleficarum and To Hell & Back – Dark Places as background to some of this story too, plus, they're just fun reads to go over again

Please make my day and leave a review.