A/N thanks for readng, sorry i should have said at the start this first post ep is 3 chapters long

o/n dont own CSI

POST EPISODE: COMITTED SEASON 5 EP 21 CONTINUED

Sara opened the door, she was shocked to see Grissom standing there, looking particularly disheveled in the early hours of the morning.

'Grissom?' Sara said, 'What are you doing here so late?' Sara turned into the house allowing Grissom to enter behind her

'Or early as it happens to be' She said smirking at him a little as he took of his coat.

'Sara, i...' Grissom stumbled around his words, he couldn't construct a coherent sentence and the truth was, he had no idea.

'Well, i was driving around and i sort of just ended up here, and thought I'd see if you were awake' Grissom said to her, trying to make it sound like it's just something one dose on a regular basis

'Grissom, really, why are you hear?, you look like you could do with some sleep and maybe even a shower!' Sara said staring him down.

She wanted the truth, and she hopped that the truth was he had just wanted to see her. She kept quiet, waiting for the cogs to turn in Grissoms head. She knew he was not a man of action, but her advances were always thwarted in the past, so she left it up to him. When she broke down he had come to her. When it was decided she needed counseling, he had arrange it for her. And he had told her to call him at night when she couldn't sleep. So now as they stood facing each other, she waited for him.
Standing in the middle of Sara's lounge room, the silence was awkward, neither knowing what to do.

'Sara' Grissom started, 'you left the lab before i had a chance to catch you, i mean, i just wanted to make sure that you were ok, you know after today and all.' He paused and looked at Sara, she just stared back him, her expression neutral.

'Sara, are you ok? I should have asked you, made you, tell me the truth please' He was practically begging her

Sara looked at him, she studied his face. She was glad that he was there but she felt awkward, what should she tell him? She hated breaking down all the time. She reached out and took his hands and pulled him gently toward her as she took a seat on the lounge.

'Griss, i'm glad you stopped by, I was thinking about calling you anyway' Sara spoke to him softly. 'Today at the lab, i didn't want you to find me, i thought if i saw you i might breakdown and i didn't want to do that at work.' She turned her head away from him 'like i said i'm glad you stopped by, but I'm fine really'

Grissom looked at Sara, the bags under her eyes told a completely different story. Pulling his hands from hers he cupped them around her face, so she couldn't turn away from him

'Don't lie to me Sara, if you're fine what are you doing awake now? Why didn't you tell me to leave? Because you're not fine, you might not want to admit it to me or to yourself but you're not fine.' Grissom stared into her eyes and he saw the glistening of tears in them

Sara closed her eyes as the tear started to fall. All the emotions of the day seemed to flow like a river from her soul, and Grissom felt every sting of those tears in his heart. He wanted to make her happy again, he wanted to see her laugh and smile like when they first met. This girl in front of him was so broken, and he wanted to be the one to fix her. After all, he had been part of the cause. While he hadn't admitted this at the time of Sara's epic break down, he had come to accept responsibility for it. He was trying to put her back together, one piece at a time.
Grissom pulled Sara into him so her head was resting against his chest, he held her there as tight as he could hopping this small gesture made her feel safe. Sara cried for hours and Grissom stayed, stroking her hair and face as she let a lifetime of hurt and pain out.
Finally, Grissom wasn't sure when, but Sara stopped crying. He looked down at her, as she started to fall asleep on him. Feeling that this might be overstepping his role as her friend he gently lifted her up and guided her into the bedroom. He let her fall gently on the bed before covering her with the blankets. He was so close to her now he could smell her wonderful scent, and not really knowing what came over him, he lent down and kissed Sara on the forehead.
He smiled as he stood up to leave, but was overcome by sadness, this was probably as close to Sara as he was ever going to get. Was this enough?, he wondered, could i live with this?
As he turned to leave, he felt Sara pull on his shirt, placing his hand over hers, he looked at her

'Griss, please don't leave' Sara mumbled 'please'

Grissom looked at her. He supposed it couldn't hurt, he bent low and whispered in her ear

'Honey, I'll be in the lounge room if you need me' He had like the feeling of kissing her forehead so he took a risk and did it again.

'No Griss, here please,' Sara rolled toward the middle of the bed 'i don't want to be alone'

Grissom hesitated, Sara was vulnerable and half asleep, what if she woke up in the morning and regretted every word of this conversation.

'Don't worry Griss' Sara said 'i won't try anything funny, promise,' She said with a grin on her face she was more awake now, even though exhaustion was taking hold of her.

'I just want to feel safe, and i feel safe with you'

Grissom took of his shoes and lay down on the bed next to her, letting her fit herself into the curves of his body. He put his arms around her and began to whispered his favorite Shakespeare into her ear. Sara fell asleep, for the first time in a very long time the nightmares didn't come. When Grissom saw Sara had fallen asleep he allowed himself to close his eyes. As he fell asleep he smiled to himself. He hoped that today would be the first day of forever, and that he would fall asleep with Sara in his arms every day, after all, life without her would be no life at all.